Hellllooooo Rookieteers! It's been too long since I've written an actual fanfic. I wouldn't really call this a fic. It's more a rambling of my inner fangirl after listening to Taylor Swift. Meh, tomato tomahto. Anywho, this is severely based off "The Way I Loved You" by Taylor Swift, which I believe is one of the best songs to describe the Luke/Andy/Sam relationship ever. I said so on Twitter and people attacked me to write this. So I wrote... this.

...So, erm. Enjoy. I think.

"He can't see the smile I'm faking
And my heart's not breaking
Cause I'm not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating, intoxicating,
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now
I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It's 2am and I'm cursing your name
I'm so in love that I acted insane
And that's the way I loved you."

-The Way I Loved You, Taylor Swift

She grins, jogs a few steps to catch up, and takes his hand. "I love you too," she murmurs back. He smiles and they continue their walk in the woods behind the beautiful house. She's happy. Unbelievably happy. It just goes to show that with a little effort and a couple uncomfortable decisions, anyone can be happy. She wishes the rest of the world can feel like this.

So why is it that something's nagging at the back of her mind? A little something she can't quite put her finger on is killing the wonderful mood she has been in since the move. It could be work. It could be her overwhelming suspicion that her father isn't going to his AA meetings. It could even be that she couldn't remember where she put her keys this morning. But if it's any of those things, she knows it wouldn't be bothering her this much.

"You okay?" he asks, concern in his voice and on his face. She smiles and nods silently, leaning her head against his shoulder. They start to walk back towards the house so they can enjoy the beautiful sunset.

So maybe she does have an idea of what's nagging her. But she refuses to acknowledge it. She refuses to acknowledge him. She's happy.

Later that night, while Luke's asleep beside her, she's awake. She stares at the clock, subconsciously counting down the hours and minutes until parade where maybe, just maybe, she'll meet the eyes of her former partner and relive every moment she's spent with him. Sometimes she wonders if he ever thinks about her constantly like this. She doubts it. Why would he anyway? She's living with her boyfriend that she loves, and she's done almost everything to push him out of her life.

Luke was the safe choice. He always has been and he always will be. It's the kind of person he is, incapable of hurting people. Maybe that's just the way she sees him. He's charming, sensible, just all around incredible. His eyes alone make her smile. The way that he looks at her while she's talking lets her know that he's listening. They live in a big, beautiful, perfect house together. He's the boyfriend she's wanted all of her life. These are the days she's dreamed about since she was able to imagine her future.

So how is it that it's Sam who's there for her more often than Luke is? Sam is the kind of person she used to date. The bad boy, the one who always ended up breaking her heart. Girls flirt with the dangerous kind. He definitely is dangerous, driving around in the squad car like a demon, waving his gun around like a flag. However, he also protects her and challenges her. He isn't afraid to point out her faults and help her fix trouble spots. They've spent months in close quarters together and he cares about her in a way she can't explain. It's all new and amazing to her.

"Dammit, Sam," she mutters, glaring at the ceiling as if it were the cause of all of her man-problems.

Luke rolls over and opens an eye at her. "Did you say something, Andy?" he mumbles sleepily.

"No. Just go back to sleep." She kisses his forehead but he's already out again. She decides to get up, grabs her phone and a blanket in the corner (one of the warm, crocheted ones that her dad's AA friend made for her) and silently heads downstairs and outside. She is content to just sit there in the security of a hand-made blanket and stare at the beautiful stars. They are still fairly close to the city, so she could only see the important ones. It doesn't matter, though. Any stars are better than no stars and she enjoys this moment. The new moon hides in a dark expanse of space that is only barely possible to distinguish from the rest of the night sky.

Her phone buzzes once in her hand, signaling a text message. From Traci, she discovers. All it says is: "Are you sure?"

She has to think about it. Luke, the sensible, honest, respectful, charming, hardworking, amazing choice. Or Sam, the dangerous, wild, crazy, frustrating, complicated, intoxicating, irritating, sarcastic, amusing, idiotic choice?

Her fingers tap out a response and she sends it. Yes, she's sure. Of course she's sure. Why wouldn't she be sure?

Wasn't she supposed to be happy?