POV: Jasper
It seems that, yes, I do envy Bella, but not for the love she shares with Edward. She has everything she's ever wanted, Edward, a house of her own, to be part of our family, and a young half-human child. I envy her and Edward for their amazing will-power not to kill or even taste this young child, Renesmee. Her blood, its scent. It's almost as taunting as Bella's was. Maybe more.
I am not around her often, no barely ever, and this is due to the problem of my lack in self restraint. She asks for me occasionally. She's learning, and very quickly, that I could cause her pain, and quite possibly kill her. It's quite amazing how a child, even if she's vampire or not, could be so knowledgeable at such a young age. She knows that the Volturi are bad, I could kill her, and Jacob is everything she's ever wanted, and everything she'll ever want.
The pain that fills my body when she's around is almost unbearable. It's so tempting to just bite her at any moment, filling my body with her beautiful mahogany, sweet tasting blood. But the wrath following Renesmee's death would be something to avoid. Six revenge seeking vampires, and sixteen werewolves, due to the imprinting rule. I'd be dead for sure.
Though, if I leave, Alice will feel that she must come too. She loves this family too much to leave it behind, as we did only a few months before, when the Volturi were attacking. She hated that more than anything. It killed her to leave when she needed too, but to leave now when she doesn't need to would destroy her. She does love me, and I love her in return, but would she leave this family for me?
The iridescent lights shone through into my room. Alices doing. Renesmee was only 6 months old, and they were having a party. Wow, seems Renesmee has made a huge influence on the family. I looked to the door as Alice entered, her small purple cocktail dress barely covering her knees. She grinned at me, her hands swinging past her sides as she danced her way toward me.
"C'mon Jazzie! This will be great!" She said, her grin reaching her ears, as she grabbed my hand and kissed my forehead.
"Alice, Is this not in anyway similar to Bella's birthday just a few years ago?" I asked, the frustration radiating through the room. Alice's emotions felt light. She was quite happy. I knew I was dampening them with my frustration and rage. This made me angrier. Alice sighed, pulling me off of my spot on the bed. I left a dint in the sheets.
"No. Jasper, you're forgetting I can see everything that will happen. And you wont kill Renesmee, don't worry." She whispered, just before we exited our room. Before leaving, she kissed me once lightly.
"Yeah, I won't kill her…" I said, knowing there was another meaning under her sentence.
"Jacob is here isn't he?" I asked, shaking my head once. She didn't reply as she led me down the stairs, walking first in front of me. As we descended, I heard the cute, tiny laugh of Renesmee, and the booming, rough laugh of Jacob. Then the smell hit me. A mix of beautifully scented blood, and werewolf. She even made the werewolf smell good. I groaned very lightly in frustration and Alice stopped walking to slap me in the stomach. My groan ceased, and then together we descended the last few stairs.
Alice was the first of us to receive a hug from Renesmee, everyone of my family, Jacob included, hovered, waiting for her to move to me. My eyes stayed on Renesmee as her beautiful features smothered my lovely wife. Her smell now reaching my safe perimeter. Edward, reading what I was thinking, nudged Emmett, who then came to stand beside me... On me, rather. Renesmee pulled away from Alice, a smile that showed all her white teeth gleaming, and time seemed to slow.
Emmett pushed hard down on my foot, and Renesmee stepped slowly towards me, her arms outstretched. Edward's alerted face turned from me, to Renesmee, then to Bella. Bella's worried face was now fixated on her daughter, her outstretched hands and my face. My eyes left Renesmee, and went to Alice, whose face had a stern expression upon it; she seemed to be the only one who trusted that I could do this. I was much undecided at this moment. I would do everything to stop myself from making a feast out of Renesmee, despite how difficult that may be.
My eyes ran back to Renesmee.