Up on a hill, far, far, FAR away from the Konoha village sits a scary house. Around that house are clouds that sit there in the sky for 24/7, and around that house only. Nobody ever goes up that house, since it's just too damn scary. There is no grass, and no color (not even purple), just BLACK. Lighting rips the sky every second. And there are no bats, since they're too scared of peeing their invisible pants at the sight of the owner.
Yes...I think you know who I'm talking about...that owner of the emo house...
The witch...
The dreamer of ruling the whole damn world (YES, the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD.)...
HINATA HYUUGA.
A little chibi (well dur. The whole stupid world is chibi) screamed in frustration, crumpled up her paper, and chucked it as hard her chibi little hands possibly could into the pile of the rest of the rejected papers. The papers balls of paper went all the way to the ceiling, in front of a picture of a blonde chibi that was ripped into shreds.
A small figure scribbled insanely at a desk where the only source of light in the house lit up in a wane yellow light.
"VWALA!" She cackled in a high pitched voice, throwing her head back to laugh. "I'VE GOT IT! I'VE GOT THE PLAN TO KILL NARUTO!"
A Chibi Moment: Hinata
Hinata stands before you, she's chibi with large lavender eyes and black hair. Her head is big, and blah blah, just imagine what Hinata would look like chibi.
"My name is Hinata Hyuuga."
"I am evil!" Lightning cracks behind her, "MUHAHA!"
"Right now, I am trying to kill Naruto." She takes a pencil and draws an ugly stick figure of a blonde boy. Taking a red colored pencil, she draws an 'x' on him.
"I would shoot him with my Super Awesome Kill Anyone in One Second Because You Hate Him and Want to Rid the World of Him So This Will Kill Him. Holds as many bullets you want and travels up to 1,000,000,000,000 miles. Only for $60,000,000 machine gun." She reads the tag carefully (of course, it's the commercial tag).
"But then of course, my cover would be blown." She sighs. Of course, everyone thinks she's shy, and weak. And that she loves Naruto, but now you know, she actually wants to KILL him.
"But now my minions, behold my NEW PLAN!"
Chibi Moment Done.
"Is this all?" A dork asked.
"Yes it is." Hinata smiled sweetly and dropped the cans of white, red, and blue paint on the counter.
"That costs $23," He grinned, "But if you want it cheap..."
Hinata looked slightly annoyed, here goes pervert move #1. For pure amusement, she played along. "Oh?" She asked touching her lip, "You want some of this?"
He drooled, and as if she was that sexy, his nose drooled as well. "Yes..."
"Okay!" She spat in his face, "Eat that R-tard!"
She ran off with the paint cans.
Paint cans, check. Paintbrush, check. Now for the cloning! She made a handsign and she poofed into someone so different...someone like...
NARUTO!
BUM BUM BUM!
And the plan began.
"Mommy! Mommy! Look!" A super deformed kid pointed at the carving of the Hokage.
The kid's mother clasps his eyes, "Goddammit, it's that Naruto kid again!"
Everyone began shouting at the boy scrambling on the stone carvings. Yes...they are all falling for it! Those idiotic mortals! Hinata/Naruto cackled.
And she began to paint on their faces.
A Chibi Moment: Naruto
Imagine Naruto as a chibi.
"Okay, so here I am studying for my exam and then BOOM! That fag, whoyoumacallit...Iruka! Yeah, you know what people, lemme redefine this for you: I NO LIKEY HIM!! I mean, Iruka is a dolphin, so half of the time, you think: why doesn't he just screw land and swim like the good little mergay he is?"
Naruto rants and screams, jumping up and down. "ONE DAY, I WILL TAKE THAT STUPID IRUKA AND THROW HIM INTO THE OCEAN!"
He coughs, "Now where was I..."
"Yes. Well, Iruka just walks in, grabs me by the collar, yea he probably was just jealous that I'm sexy and he's not, but he starts yelling gibberish!"
Chibi Moment Done"BLah BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH..."
That was all Naruto heard as Iruka shouted. But he growled when he heard, "WHY WOULD YOU PAINT ON THE OLD PEOPLES' FACES?"
"I DID NOT PAINT ON THE OLD FAGS' FACES!" Naruto screamed. Goddammit, it's Hinata again.
"ONE CHANCE NARUTO! THAT'S ALL YOU GET!"
"FINE!"
Next day at school...
"Hi NEEEEEEEEJJJJJJJJIIIIIIIIIII!" A spiky haired boy wearing an outfit of pink skipped gayly (both ways) into the room. Everyone groaned and smacked their heads on the table as the boy walked to his seat and started screaming.
"I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES! EVERYBODY'S NERVES! EVERYBODY'S NERVES!..."
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!" Ino yelled.
The boy gasped, "INO said a BAD BAD word! Hurry! Wash your tongue!" He grabbed her hair and pushed her head into a sink, squeezing soap into her mouth.
"SASUKE! YOU ASSHOLE!" Sakura took the boy as slapped him in the face.
"Aww...why is everyone swearing these days?" He sobbed on his knees.
Sakura took him by his pink collar and brought him back to his seat, where he played with his pink purse.
And of course, he got bored after 5 whole seconds.
"NEJI!"
Neji ignored him.
"NEJI!"
No response.
"NEJI!"
"NEJI!"
"NEJI!"
"NEJI!"
"NEJI"!
Still nothing.
"NE NE!"
"NE NE!"
"NE NE!"
Neji didn't bother to yell at him for his new pet name.
"JI JI!"
"JI JI!"
"JI JI!"
"NEJ NEJ!"
"NEJ NEJ!"
"NEJ NEJ!"
"NEJ NEJ!"
"EJI EJI!"
"EJI EJI!"
"NEJI!"
"NEJI!"
"NEJI!"
"GODDAMMIT! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT!??"
"HI!" He waved.
"ARG!!!!" Neji banged his head on his desk.
"OMG Neji! Are you ok? Aw..." Ino immediately hugged him, trying to seem as hott as she could. Sakura glared at her and leaned on his desk, squeezing her arms together trying to make her boobs seem larger (and of course, it doesn't work since she's a chibi).
"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!!!!" Neji yelled.
Sasuke looked at Neji sadly. I always wanted a guy to like me like that...
He screamed in a high-pitched voice when a kunai hit the wall only centimeters away from him.
Iruka walked in just then and saw this and decided to blame Naruto
"NARUTO!! THAT'S IT! INTO JAIL WITH YOU!!!!"
To be continued...
This was my first fanfiction and oringinally used for my personal amusement to show to my friends. However, I decided to let the world know about my ideas. And to people who might be slightly insulted: I do not feel this way about Naruto, I am simply adding slight humor. Anyway, comment, just push the button and type, you know you want to...