Author's Note: This is just something I thought of while doing the dishes one day after watching an episode of Reba. This is based on one of the many Reba vs Barbara Jean arguments. Yes this is anti-Twilight.
Bella vs Brianna
Bella gave Brianna a nervous, puppy-brown eyed look that would melt the hearts of any living soul… except Brianna's.
The bronze haired woman placed her hands on her hips and gave Bella a 'look'.
"Okay, come on Bella, what's going on?" asked Brianna in a would-be-dangerous tone.
Bella began to play with her hair while she attempted to not look the half-elf in the eyes. The hard look of the teal eyed woman finally won out and the brunette caved.
"Oh, I'm in love with Jacob Black!" she whined.
Brianna's jaw dropped and she was suddenly speechless.
She shook her mind back into order after a few seconds and exclaimed, "WHAT?"
Bella cleared her throat and gave Brianna a nervous smile as she fidgeted with her hands.
"W-well, you see, Bri, Jake and I, we just have a sort of connection and if it wasn't for Edward I think-" Brianna exploded into a verbal rage; cutting her cousin off mid-rant.
"What are you thinking you imbecile! You have any idea how much trouble you'll be in if you say this out loud to anyone else? Or if anything ended up happening? DO YOU WANT TO BE A REGISTERED CHILD MOLESTER?" she yelled hoarsely.
Bella cowered in the corner and Brianna glared at her. She then whipped her phone out and started dialing. Bella looked confused.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
Brianna gave her a dirty look.
"Calling your father."
"Why?"
Brianna rolled her eyes as the phone began to ring.
"SO HE CAN ARREST YOU!" she snapped.
Bella ran up to Brianna and attempted to grab the phone away from her. The half-elf whipped herself out of Bella's reach as fast as lightening.
"Bri, come on! If dad hears about this, he's going to be livid!" she exclaimed.
Brianna gave her a look, "Oh yes, just kind of how livid he's going to be when he finds out that you're dating a one hundred and eight year old vampire!"
"BRI PLEASE DON'T!" begged Bella.
Brianna clicked the phone shut and then began to dial another number after re-opening it. Bella looked fearful.
"Please say that you're not doing something rash like calling the elf queen?" she begged.
Brianna rolled her eyes, "No, I'm not calling the elf queen. If I was going to I would have done so a long time ago. No, I'm calling a therapist."
Bella's jaw dropped, "But- but Brianna, I can't go to a therapist and tell them about my life!"
Brianna sighed as she felt the head ache coming on full force.
"I'm calling a non-human therapist. Mine to be exact. She'll help you out," insisted the woman.
Bella looked curious, "A full blooded elf?"
"No, she's a witch. Tall black hat, black dress and everything. She'll be of some use, I reckon," explained Brianna simply.