It had been a week since the Sadie Hawkins dance incident. Blaine still physically hurt but he was getting past it. It was the emotional trauma that had got to him. Being called those names, fag, as his attackers beat him to a pulp. They had threatened to do it again of he went back to their school. He was told to live his life in fear, because this is the only treatment he deserved to get. The abuse from the bullies he could handle, to an extent. He always thought he would have his family behind him.
He was right, of course. Well, right up until he had came out to them a few weeks before. His mother was understanding enough, if not a little confused. His brother said he still loved him, but Blaine couldn't help but notice him acting differently around him, awkwardly avoiding him and failing to make conversations with him. His father, though, his father was the worst. He didn't speak to Blaine for days until Blaine called him out on it.
Disgusting. Disgraceful. Ashamed. No son of mine. These were the words that were being hurled towards Blaine from his own father. These words hurt more than anything Blaine had ever felt. He looked up to his father, he always had. But to hear that his father thought he was disgusting and a disgrace to the family, that was too much to handle.
Blaine locked himself in his room for days, barely spoke to his family out of shame for who he was, for what he was. He began researching camps he could go to, ones that would make him normal. He needed his father's approval, he couldn't imagine life without it and he was going to do anything to get it back, even if it meant denying himself.
Well, that was until he started getting to know the only other gay kid in his school. The one that convinced him that he was normal and that his dad would come around. The one that began to raise Blaine's confidence, at least enough for Blaine to ask him to the dance. The boy, despite his earlier encouragement towards Blaine, insisted that the school wasn't ready for gay kids to be so open, but it was Blaine that wasn't backing down. And therefore, he felt, it was his fault that they had been beaten up for going together. It was his fault that the other kid ended up in hospital and was forced to transfer out of state. Something Blaine wished his family would do for him, but he had no such luck.
The reaction from his father was what sent Blaine spiraling into an even deeper pit of depression, one without even a glimmer of hope. Good, he had said. It should have been more, he continued. Maybe some of the queer could have been beaten out of him. Blaine had cried for days on end thinking about what he could do, about what sort of future he had. It wasn't fair, he didn't choose to be like this, he didn't choose to be a disappointment to his family. It was then he reached his conclusion. Everyone would be better off without him.
That evening, when everyone was out, he walked up the stairs to his room after leaving a simple note on the fridge. Trying to hold back the tears that just kept coming, he dressed himself in his black suit, complete with a bow tie. He grabbed an old belt of his and made his way to the bathroom. Staring in the mirror, he took some time to compose himself. He needed to be strong. He needed to do this and then everything would be better for everyone, including himself. He felt disgusted with himself, and what he had done to his family as he looked at himself in the mirror. Someone like him didn't deserve a decent life, not if it made others completely miserable.
This is it he thought as he climbed up onto the bathroom stool. He looped the belt around his neck and tied it around the beam that ran across the roof of the bathroom. He brushed himself down and took a deep breath in. It would be his last he thought. As he breathed out and tried to relax his body, he stepped off of the stool.