Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me. All rights go to JK Rowling/Warner Bros. I do not profit in any way.
Pregnant
Lily had always believed in using muggle alternatives whenever she could. After all, she'd been brought up without magic, so she naturally trusted muggle methods more than she did wizarding ones.
In their flat, Lily insisted that she and James buy a toaster instead of using toasting charms on their bread and she'd bought a bike which she used to get up to the supermarket instead of apparating. (James refused to try out the bicycle, however much Lily tried to convince him, but he was rather partial to the toaster.)
So when Lily first had suspicions, she'd made her way straight to the nearest pharmacy, on her bike, no less. She went in, looking considerably pale, bought what she needed (had she imagined that disapproving look from the woman at the till?) and left quietly, tucking the brown paper bag discreetly into her bag.
She knew how it worked, but being conscientious Lily Potter, she read the instructions anyway.
And then the time for delay was over. Lily was pretty sure that James was still asleep in their double bed - that had been why she'd left so early in the morning, but she didn't want to tempt fate.
Lily took the pregnancy test out of the bag, and followed the unfortunately diagrammed instructions.
And then the wait.
It was torturous.
Lily tried ever so hard not to think about what a positive outcome could mean for she and James. It couldn't happen... they couldn't do this right now, surely? It was too early... they were so young...
It was time for Lily to remove her head from between her knees, and look at the stick.
She knew what it would tell her before she looked.
Pregnant.
Pregnant.
Lily almost passed out, looking at the stick she'd just unceremoniously urinated on.
Pregnant. With child. Knocked up.
In the middle of a bloody war in which they were soldiers.
Shit.
Could she bring a baby up in this environment?
Could they do it, she and James? Were they ready?
Would they make good parents, or do a completely awful job?
Would they be able to shelter this child from the war?
A knock at the bathroom door interrupted Lily's inner-panicking.
"Lil?" I familiar voice said, husky from sleep. "You in there?"
Lily took a deep breath and stood up.
Her legs were shaking.
"Coming," she said, her voice wavering. She made her way over to the door and unlocked it.
Although she was frantic, Lily couldn't help observing James's boxers-clad form for a moment. His dark hair was tousled from sleep, and the abs that he'd managed to keep through Quidditch with the Marauders were on full display.
He must have caught her looking, because he smiled and gently cupped a hand under her chin so that she was looking him in the eyes again.
"Good morning, beautiful," he said, evidently not seeing her flushed cheeks and slightly brimming eyes for a moment.
Lily attempted a smile in return, but it fell by the wayside.
Lily could tell the moment that he noticed, because his eyebrows pulled together into a concerned expression.
"Lily?" he said, "What's wrong."
Desperately trying not to let her hysteria show, Lily grabbed her pregnancy test from where she'd left in on the floor next to the toilet.
When she shoved it at James, he frowned more.
"What the bloody hell is this?" James asked, "And how has it gotten you so upset? It's just plastic, Lily..."
Lily was pleased that she had a dolt for a husband for a moment, because James's complete obliviousness distracted her from the situation for a minute.
"You should have taken Muggle Studies," Lily said tiredly, softly.
Lily's defeated tone seemed to worry James more.
Before he could question her again, Lily looked him straight in his hazel eyes, and said, "I'm pregnant, James."
There was a moment of completely shocked silence. It seemed more real to Lily now that she'd said it out loud, but having James to share the burden with did make it better.
"You're... you're what?" he asked, even though Lily could tell he knew exactly what she'd said.
"Pregnant," she repeated. "Pregnant with your child."
James's eyebrows lifted ever so slightly, a trace of his trademark smirk playing at the corners of his lips. "You're sure it's mine?"
Lily hit him.
James laughed.
Lily let out a little smile.
James beamed.
"Pregnant," he repeated in wonder. "A baby. Wow."
"Wow," Lily agreed. "We should have been more careful..."
James looked at her, still grinning like he'd just been handed the world on a silver platter.
The curious thing was, Lily could feel her own anxiety melting away with James's reaction.
As if noticing Lily wasn't beaming for the first time, James's smile dimmed a little. "You... don't want it?" he asked. "You don't... we could always..." he broke off, biting his lip in an adorably childlike action, and looking down at the floor. "It's your decision," he said finally, and Lily could tell he meant it. James would never push her into anything.
Lily placed a hand on his cheek, and he looked into her eyes.
"We're in the middle of a war," Lily started. "We're fighting for our lives in the Order, we're seeing friends get injured or worse all the time. The Ministry is corrupted, and Muggleborns are being abducted and killed every single week," she took a deep breath. "This is probably the worst time for us to have a baby."
James closed his eyes for a moment, leaning into her hand. He looked resigned to whatever he thought she was going to say.
"But," Lily said, and James's eyes flew open to meet hers, a dash of hope evident in his eyes. "I must be horrifically selfish, or tremendously stupid, because none of that is going to make me take this away from us."
Smiling truly this time, her mind made up, Lily placed a hand on her lower stomach as she said the last words. Seeing James's beaming smile gradually return, Lily reached out for his hand and placed it under hers.
One of her hands on his shoulder, his holding her gently around the waist, and their other hands linked on Lily's stomach, the young couple stood there for a couple of minutes more.
And then, smiling gently, James pulled his wife against his bare chest, their hands now sandwiched between her abdomen and his.
He kissed Lily on the forehead, both cheeks, and then her nose, making her giggle. And then he rested his forehead on hers, and stared deep into her green eyes.
"I love you," James said, his eyes still burning into Lily's. "And we're going to get through this. Our child will be safe. We'll make sure of it."
A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Let me know what you thought in reviews - they make my day!
Abi xx
