I didn't liked to be touched. At a young age I had learned that being touched meant pain and trouble. That's why I didn't have any friends. I kept everyone at a distance. My parents and my brother. And everyone else around me. I showed it by only wearing black. And I didn't talk to anyone. I would answer if they asked me something. But I kept my answers short and private.

I was an angry child and now I was an even more angry eighteen year old. I was angry at myself and the entire world. Growing up in a broken family did that. And it didn't help either that my mom was extremely abusive. And I didn't even want to talk about my brother.

And today I was extremely pissed off. Today I moved in to Barden. My mother didn't want me anymore so she called my dad. Apparantly they agreed that I needed an education at college. So now I had to attend the university my father taught.

I didn't want to go to college. I wanted to go to L.A. to become a music producer. I wanted to go as far as possible from him. And now I had to practically live with him. At least I would live in a dorm. I didn't want see him. I still had nightmares about the last time I saw him.

After I had finally arrived in my dorm I was more than angry. First I was being serenade by some nerd. And now my new room mate turned out to be some creep. When I thought it couldn't possibly be worse, my father came to visit me. I didn't want to see him. I hadn't seen him for ten years. He wasn't there when I needed him the most. He wasn't there to protect me, when I needed protection. And that was one of the reasons I was angry at him.

My room mate gave me a way out and I took it. I walked around the activities fair and signed up for interning at the radio station. I walked around when I saw them. Two stunning girls from some a capella group. A gorgeous redhead and a equally beautiful blonde. They asked me to join them. But I didn't do friends. Or group activities. So I told them I couldn't sing. I walked away and went back to my dorm.

My room mate was still out so I put on my headphones. I was so focused on my music that I didn't hear my door open. I didn't hear him come in. I didn't noticed he walked up to me. When he tapped me on my shoulders I turned around. I froze when I saw it was him. He was the last person I wanted to see. He was the reason I was broken and angry. And seeing his disgusting face made me sick.

"Hello dear sister, long time no see" he said.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered.

I felt instantly I was that helpless little girl again. He noticed that and enjoyed my weak state.

He wanted to answer my question when the door opened and my room mate came in.

"I see you later sissy' and walked out of my dorm.

Still shaken but glad my room mate saved me. I went to bed and tried to sleep. When I finally fell asleep, my nightmares came back.

A month went by and the only thing I did was working at the radio station. I loved working there but I wasn't happy with my coworker. It was that nerd who serenade me at my first day. He wanted to befriend me, but I didn't do friendship.

My father wasn't pleased when he found out I didn't go to any of my classes. He promised to help me to move to L.A. if I joined one group on campus. I promised I would think about it.

I needed to shower but I hated the public showers. I didn't feel comfortabele being naked in a public place. But I had no other choice. So I usually went when most people already slept. I walked in the shower and turned on the water. I was singing 'Titanium' and was about to start showering , when somebody opened the shower curtain. I panicked and turned around to see who it was. It was the stunning redhead I saw at the activities fair. She asked me something but I was so scared that I didn't hear it. She didn't notice my fear. I put the shower curtain around me but she came in. She talked about the song being her lady jam. But I tried to focus on my breathing. She demanded that I sing.I just wanted her to leave. But she wouldn't go till I sang. In the end I gave in. Anything so that she would leave.

I started to sing and then she joined me. Our voices sounded perfect together. I was still scared but also amazed about what just happened. And then her naked boyfriend also came in my shower to compliment me about my voice. I immediately felt terrified again. This time the redhead seemed to notice I was uncomfortable. So she left. But not before telling me to audition for the Barden Bella's.

I quickly finish my shower and went back to my dorm. Thinking about what had happened. I really didn't want to audition for anything. But my fathers promise kept going through my head. It was my only way out to get away from him. He didn't show up after that last time. But I knew he would come back.

It was my fear for him that made me decide to audition. I would take any chance to get away from him. I didn't want a a replay about what happened before.

To my own surprise I got in. Only I didn't know that they would kidnap me for initiation. So when a sack was put over my head I freaked out. I had a full breakdown. I panicked and lost all control. My kidnapper noticed and removed the sack. I calmed down a little bit when I saw it was the beautiful blonde captain of the Bella's.

"Beca are you okay?" she asked me concerned.

But I was so panicked I couldn't answer. I just shook my head.

"Breathe Beca. You need to focus on your breathing" she said.

She coached me and soon I started to feel better.

"Sorry, it is a part of initiation. I didn't mean to scare you" she said.

"It's okay. Lets finish this okay" I said.

She guided me to the Bella's headquarters and before we got in she put the sack back over my head.