Disclaimer: I don't own any of the themes, names, etc etc
"Happy Christmas, George!"
"Happy Christmas, Fred!"
They smiled brightly at each other as they sat up in bed. The pair stretched and looked around the room, the sun wasn't up yet, but a small fire roared to life as they began moving about, and there was a small pile of gifts at the foot of each bed. They eagerly crawled to the end of their bed, then, after a quick inspection, they hopped onto one another's bed with a chuckle. The twins weren't quite sure if the house elves just couldn't tell them apart, or if they were getting them back for all the dungbombs the pair had set off in the kitchen. After settling down in front of the correct pile of presents, they started opening the parcels.
"Oh look, a jumper." said George, fondly remembering their Christmases at the burrow.
"Fancy that," replied Fred, sarcastically. He looked up and, with a sly grin, snatched the jumper his brother was holding. Stuffing himself into the lumpy handmade garment, a large "G" now sat on his chest. A smile crept across George's face, his brother was up to something, and that usually meant trouble.
[2hrs later]
"We had no idea you were so attached to those trees!" mocked Fred. He and George sat on the bench outside Filch's office, trying not to laugh. They had spent much of the day setting off dung bombs all over the castle. They did fantastic at not getting caught until Filch found them setting a particularly nasty one off in one of the castle's many magnificent Christmas trees. Before Filch could formulate a reply, however, there was a scream from down the hall. The old caretaker's head whipped around in the direction of the outburst, while the two ginger wizards turned to each other and shared a look of excitement and curiosity.
A small group of Ravenclaws came darting around the corner, letting out a few more shrieks as a familiar cackle rang out. A large red orb went sailing over one boy's head, it shattered in a brilliant explosion of glass as it hit the stone wall.
"Ding dong! Ding dong! Ring the Hogwarts bell!" sang Peeves as he soared around the corner a handful of colorful glass decorations in his hands. When he saw Filch standing there, his eyes lit up.
"DING! DONG! DING! DONG!" He screeched, punctuating each word by hurling an ornament at Filch's head. He winked at the trouble making twins, causing them to burst into a fit of giggles, angering Filch all the more.
Dodging the baubles as best he could, the old Squib grabbed the boys painfully by the ears and yanked them into is office.
"Sit down. Shut up. Don't move. I'll deal with you two in a minute," sputtered Filch before slamming the door. A muffled yelling was heard as he chased after the cackling poltergeist. As soon as it was quiet, Fred stood up and immediately started rifling through papers on the desk in front of him.
"Between him and Mum, I sometimes wish I didn't have ears." George muttered as he rubbed his left ear in disdain. "Anything good?" he added.
"Just a bunch of detention slips, mostly ours" chuckled Fred, as he moved onto the drawers, glancing up as his brother locked the door, and pushed a filing cabinet in front of it. With one final shove, the cabinet hit the doorknob with a bang, both boys froze, listening to the hall and hoping they weren't caught. One of the drawers slowly rolled out in the silence, two sets of nearly identical eyes darted towards it and the words "CONFISCATED and HIGHLY DANGEROUS" in scratchy handwriting instantly caught their attention. Abandoning the drawer he was in, Fred sprinted across the office stopping in front of the drawer.
"Wicked," they breathed in unison. With a chuckle, they both reached for the drawer, a sound in the hall startled them. They quickly, and without thought, threw open the box and started shoving its contents, into the pockets of their jeans. As the sound in the hall grew louder George shoved the cabinet back into its place and pulled out another dungbomb, while Fred quickly returned the things onto the desk as best he could. Which, after years of practise snooping in Charlie and Bill's rooms, he was pretty good at. Quickly George dropped the bomb, just as a sweaty and angry Filch opened the door.
[Back in their dorm]
"3 WEEKS OF DETENTION!" Huffed George, flopping onto his bed with a sigh.
"That's the best yet!" exclaimed Fred, as he sat down beside his brother. George rolled his eyes and laughed, he rolled onto his belly and was promptly stabbed in the leg by something sharp. He was quickly, and painfully, reminded of all the things they had gathered from Filch's file cabinet.
"Oy, what 'chu think this rubbish is?" the ginger boy asked, as he started pulling fistfuls of paper and odd trinkets out of his pockets.
They quickly recognized some Muggle firecrackers, very similar to some they had pinched off their Dad's desk at the ministry. A few of the papers looked to have jinxes and they quickly stashed those in their trunk for another day.
"This is just a detention slip!" exclaimed a very disappointed Fred, as he flattened out a particularly crumpled page. Looking up from the badge in his hand—apparently "Tom" was Head Boy and apparently that was dangerous—George chuckled a bit.
"I have a few of those too," he replied, gesturing to a discarded pile of parchment. His brother picked them up and started reading them aloud.
"Peter, James, Siri- OW!!" he yelped, as he tossed the pile down and looked at his fingers. "The damned things burned me!" he started, in surprise. George laughed loudly.
"What? These musty old things?" he mocked, retrieving one from the bed where they had landed. "6 weeks detention for improper use of - Hey! Bloody hell!!" tossing the offending paper just as his sibling had moments before. They both stared in astonishment for a moment, then glanced at each other angrily.
"What a load of bollocks this mess is!" Fred grumbled as he quickly piled everything into a box. "Highly Dangerous, my arse," he continued
"What 'chu going to do with it?" asked Fred
"Here, pass me that bit of parchment, what is it?" George replied, ignoring the question his brother asked. "It's blank?" he wondered, as he opened up the neatly folded yellowed page. After making a disgusted face he tossed it on top of the rest of the mess. He moved around, gather a few more bits and bobs, angrily tossing them in the pile.
Once he was satisfied with the collection, he pulled a small jar containing a blue flame out of a pocket in his cloak, as he took out the stopper, a flash of light caught George's eye. "It burned us, we burn it. Seems fair," he announced, matter of factly, as he dumped the small blue flame into the box. The papers quickly caught and the flame swelled, as George looked on he remembered the headboy pin that had stabbed him. He quickly retrieved it and tossed it into the flames with a chuckle. As he did so, something caught his eye. He looked on and watched the words "OY, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" slowly appear on the large piece of parchment.
"Fred! Fred, do you see that?"
"See what, George? A burning pile of junk? Yeah I helped make it," Fred replied, mocking the other wizard.
"No, arsehole," He pushed past the other Weasley boy. "The parchment! Words just… Appeared on it."
Fred turned to see his brother reaching into the fire and grabbing the paper, burning himself in the process.
"Bloody hell, George! It's a bit of rubbish!"
Before George could respond more words started to appear:
"Speak for yourself mate!" and directly beneath that the words "Yah, who are you calling rubbish, you plug-ugly git."
George read the insult out loud and started laughing hysterically. "I think you pissed off the rubbish, mate."
"You do realize you're identical twins? That means you're a plug-ugly git, too!"
"Prongs, I reckon he's the uglier twin, yeah? Just look at him. Manky looking knob, that one is."
"Right you are, Padfoot."
It was Fred's turn to laugh this time. "We're being insulted by a piece of bloody old scrap paper," he said, wiping away tears. "They're right, though. You are the uglier twin." He smirked at his brother with a wiggle of his brows. He looked back down as more words started to pop up.
"How did you blithering idiots find this bit of rubbish, as you say, anyway?"
Fred and George looked at each other mischievously. "We stole it," George announced with a grin.
"Yeah," Fred added, "Right from Filthy Filch's office."
"Caught ourselves three weeks of detention just to get in there and look around," George finished, proudly.
"Only three weeks? Now that is rubbish."
"Indeed, it is."
"We could've pulled off much better than that, couldn't we, Wormtail?"
"Oh definitely, Moony!"
"That's a new record for us, you know." sputtered the older brother, indignantly.
"What are you two up to anyway?"
The fiery haired twins looked at the paper and back to each other with a twinkle in their eyes. "Usually no good," they chimed together, "No good at all."
"Is that so?"
"Would you swear it?"
"Of course," Fred said. George followed him with a "Yeah" and a nod of his head.
"Alright then, say it."
"Wands out… "
"You solemnly swear…"
The twins each looked curious, wondering what a shabby old piece of parchment could be up to. They quickly pulled out their wands and, together, they recited, "We solemnly swear that we are up to no good."
Slowly, the words on the page vanished and something else began to materialize. "Messers Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers" Georgeread aloud quietly, his eyes followed the words as they danced across the page "Must be the blokes that were insulting us…" his voice trailed off as the parchment came to life again.
Fred nodded his head with a grin plastered across his freckled face, he picked up where his brother had left off
"... Are proud to present the Marauder's Map…
MAP? MAP! It's a map!" a sharp punch in the arm reminded him to stop shouting.
As the wizards looked on, thin lines started to spread across the page, linking together to make passageways and corridors, as they studied it they soon realized they were looking at a very detailed map of Hogwarts. There were small ink dots, moving about the map, with tiny labels beneath them. A dot labeled "Mrs Norris" and another labeled "Argus Filch" were in the office they had been in not long before. As they scanned the page they noted two dots with the titles "George Weasley" and "Fred Weasley" huddled together, in Gryffindor tower.
"Bloody Hell," they sighed in unison.
"This- this map shows every person in the castle, and even on the grounds." George added, pointing to a dot labeled "Rubeus Hagrid"
"Yeah, I can see that," replied Fred sarcastically, "Wait… What's that there?" He pointed to a note in the corner of the map that was written in the same handwriting from the Messers, earlier.
"Don't forget, keep it safe and clear it when you're done, you don't want that greasy git Snape seeing it.
"Tap it with your wand and say, 'Mischief Managed',"
"Mischief Managed," they read, in unison, as they tapped the page with their wands. The ink on the page disintegrated until it was once again a blank piece of old parchment. They slowly turned to each other.
"Wicked!"