"What did you want to talk about?"
Victor missed the ice. Some small part of Yuuri had known for a while now, but it had been easy to ignore; Victor loved coaching him more than he loved skating, he'd thought. But today, Yuuri knew for sure - Victor couldn't be happy living like this. Yuuri felt overwhelmingly guilty. He stole Victor from the world, and he stole skating from Victor.
I'm so selfish. Yuuri looked away from Victor, who sat in the window drying his hair, down at his own hands - now fists - in his lap.
"After the final," he said, "let's end this."
The silence was loud. Yuuri couldn't bring himself to look up.
"What do you mean?" Victor's voice was empty.
Yuuri looked at Victor's ring. Why had he given him a ring? He'd tied him down.
"I don't want you to coach me anymore," he said quietly, his voice just as empty.
Victor leaned back against the window - a backdrop of stars. He dropped the hand towel, letting it slide from his fingers to the floor. "Is it because of your score today?" he asked. "You'll make it up tomorrow."
"It's not that," said Yuuri quickly. He bit his lip. He felt so useless.
"Then why?"
"I want you to skate again!" Yuuri blurted out. "You miss it, and everyone misses you. You thought I would be great, but I'm not! Yurio beat both of us. I'm no better than I was last year. I've held you back, I've held everyone back!" He hung his head and his shoulders, determined to hide his tears.
"Yuuri," said Victor. Yuuri could hear the smile in his voice, and he knew Victor was going to try and talk him out of it. "It's the opposite. Everyone's more determined because of you. I love skating more because of you. I love watching you."
"Liar!" Yuuri shouted, standing up and looking at Victor now. His expression was pained as he plead for understanding. "Yurio broke your record. You need to skate again!"
Victor went quiet, then stood up and put his hands on Yuuri's shoulders, gently pushing him backwards onto the hotel bed.
"Don't tell me what I want," said Victor. He hovered over Yuuri, his hair still wet from his shower. Their faces were inches apart, but Yuuri looked past Victor at the ceiling.
"Look at me," urged Victor. "If I ever skate again, it will be with you."
Yuuri could feel his neck growing warm. A drop of water fell from Victor's hair, and Victor raised a hand to trace it down Yuuri's cheek. He cupped Yuuri's chin, and reluctantly, Yuuri looked back at him. Victor smiled.
"And if I ever compete again," he continued, "it will be with you."
"I - I don't know what that means," Yuuri admitted.
Victor flopped off of Yuuri and onto his side, but continued to trace his fingers down Yuuri's cheek, along his jaw, down his collarbone. "I want you to win the Grand Prix," he said gently. "And after you do, even if we both compete again, I want us to train together, to learn together. I want us to stay like this forever."
"Victor," Yuuri whispered, half in awe, half in appreciation.
Victor pulled him in closer. "Let me sleep with you tonight," he said teasingly.
Yuuri's blushed, but he let himself relax against Victor's body. "Okay," he said quietly.
Victor's face lit up, and, without regard for Yuuri's comfort, he rolled Yuuri on top of him and hugged him tightly. "And no more talk about us ending, it's depressing," he said with a laugh.
"Okay."
"I'll always be here," he said, more warmly, running his hand through Yuuri's hair.
Yuuri smiled as he lay his head on Victor's chest. He still hated himself. He was still afraid. He still felt selfish. But right now, none of that mattered.
"Okay."
Note: I wrote a one shot to help me get over the end of episode 11! As always, please review! More to come!
Note 2: I thought I made it clear, but this isn't the only 'chapter' of the series. A lot of reviews are reminding me to add 'complete' (or 'COMPLETE')? IDK. I did forget the character tags though, thanks for the heads up!