WARNING: This story contains spoilers from Harry Potter and the Cursed Child. It's nothing pertaining much to the actual plot line of the play, but still something that'll give you feels so I strongly suggest you experience them via the book first.
DISCLAIMER: I am obviously not JK Rowling, just another innocent victim of the magical black hole she's created.
It had been years since Jane had last seen Draco Malfoy, even longer since they had spoken. They had run into each other in Diagon Alley when he was shopping with his son, Scorpius, for his first year at Hogwarts while buying some last second supplies for herself. After many years of pushing quills and clawing her way through the Ministry's Department of Defense, she had been chosen to groom the next generation of Witches and Wizards as Professor of Charms at Hogwarts. Her promotion, albeit unexpected, turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Life working behind a desk at the Ministry proved to be less exciting than she had originally anticipated, so when Jane was asked to return to her Alma Matter she had jumped at the chance. It had been just before her twelfth year teaching.
When she ran into Draco in Diagon Alley that day, she wasn't sure how to react. Truth be told, if it hadn't been for her friendly relationship with the younger Greengrass, Astoria, she probably would have avoided him entirely. The three had all been in Slytherin House together, though Jane had always leaned more toward the unity quality of the House than superiority, hence her casual friendship with Astoria. Unfortunately, she was also seriously afflicted with the characteristic of fierce loyalty. This became a more prominent issue for Jane during sixth year. She and Draco had very few interactions over the years beforehand, nothing more than a strictly cordial acknowledgment and assigned pairings in class. It had become very obvious very fast that something was wrong with Draco that year. He withdrew almost entirely from his small circle of trust, his face becoming more gaunt and eyes more listless as the weeks passed. When he missed the much anticipated Gryffindor-Slytherin Quidditch match, Jane had decided it was time to intervene.
Draco wanted nothing to do with her, predictably. It wasn't enough to deter her though, her hero complex was resolute, so when when it came to the previously infallible Draco Malfoy she couldn't turn back. Even though she couldn't figure out where he would vanish to when he reached the seventh floor, couldn't stir more than a curt nod when they passed in the Common Room, Jane still tallied her small victories.
Her most notable victory had been one night after Easter Break. She had gotten distracted by her Potions essay and was running late for dinner, but she didn't miss the blur of platinum blonde disappearing into the second floor girls lavatory. Jane remembered pausing in that moment and questioning whether, now that he had no place further to scurry off to, she should follow. The feeling of uncertainty dragged behind her as she approached the door, her breath hitching in her throat when she heard sobbing. Full body, trembling sobs. She saw him hunched over the sink, gripping on to the cool porcelain of the sink for dear life. Her approach was slow and silent as she asked herself what in the hell she was thinking. At least, it was silent until Draco ripped off his sweater and accidentally whipped it straight in her face, earning an involuntary 'oof'. Jane was sure Draco would get whiplash from how quickly his head turned to face her, though she'd never once been sure whether in was the rage or tears in his eyes that made them red.
"What the hell do you want from me, Wentworth?"
"Draco, I – "
"No, you know what? You don't get to explain yourself. Piss off. Why haven't you realized that I don't want anything to do with you? Why won't you just leave me be?"
"Because unlike your shite excuse for friends I'm not just going to stand by and watch you break apart. I know how you are, you're far too prideful to admit that you need help or at the very least someone to talk to. You feel like needing another person like that makes you weak so you just turn and push everyone away while you drown. I'm not going to pretend I understand what's going on with your family but you can't – ." Jane was cut off by another choked sob as Draco's knees buckled beneath him. His knuckles turned a ghastly white as his hand clenched into fists, tears he tried to hide in shame splashing off of his alabaster skin.
"I – I have to...Mother, she's not...he'll – I have to..." Draco talked himself in stammered circles, never quite divulging what was ripping him apart as he sunk closer to the floor. He sunk down until his forehead met the cold tile floor and his fingers knotted desperately in his hair as if his physical presence was the only thing convincing him that this was all real. Eight months of trying to persuade him to confide in her, but never once did Jane imagine it would be like this. Troubled or not, she was still expecting him to at most spit obscurities at her with his nose still turned up in the air. This though, Draco was broken, completely devoid of any signs of the once proud Slytherin that could strike fear into any student with a single calculated glare.
Jane knelt next to him, struggling to find any words to comfort him. His body was completely rigid, but somehow she'd managed to shift him to his side, head resting defeated in her lap. Still she couldn't decide what to say, so she offered instead whatever sense of emotional comfort she could provide by running her fingers through his hair. Draco remained silent, just laid there completely defeated while more hot tears than he ever thought he was capable of producing fell. He felt dirty in that moment, weak as he lay cradled in the arms of a girl he'd sworn to avoid on a dark bathroom floor. He was raised to be stronger than this, he was stronger than this. It was nearly the end of the school year though, and the Dark Lord had made it very clear how disappointed he was that the Vanishing Cabinet wasn't mended yet over Easter Break. His mother had paid the price.
"Draco, you don't have to be alone."
Not even a second later he was sitting straight up again, wiping tears from his wild eyes and yanking Jane to her feet.
"Hide."
Jane had sought refuge in one of the toilet cubicles while Draco and Harry Potter exchanged a flurry of curses. She'd heard as Harry yelled out a spell she'd never seen in their texts, staggered as Draco's mangled scream of pain reverberated off the walls, held herself back as she heard him hit the flooded floor and Snape whispered the counter curse that saved his life.
That was the last time Draco had spoken to her until they crossed paths at Diagon Alley. Not after he was released from the hospital wing, not when they passed each other during the attack he orchestrated, not once during their entire seventh year. Jane had been sitting on a bench with Astoria while Draco and Scorpius were inside Flourish and Blotts. The two had been excited to catch up, but it was obvious how weary Astoria was. She had always been ill as a child, the result of a blood curse she'd spoken only once of before, but Jane found herself worrying about how bad it had gotten since Scorpius' birth and what that could mean in the future for the boy and Draco. Soon a young boy ran to Astoria's arms rambling about some advanced potions book he'd found even though he wasn't skilled enough to use it yet. Jane nearly laughed at how much he looked like his father and reveled in the very different manner in which he'd been raised.
"Scorpius, darling, this is an old friend of mine. She'll be your Charms teacher. Jane, this is Scorpius."
Jane could have almost drowned in the waves of pride crashing off of Astoria. Almost. She had been distracted by the sharp intake of breath from behind her. Draco stood there with the same aristocratic beauty he'd always possessed, age having only matured that appearance like a fine bottle of firewhisky. Having not seen him since seventh year, nearly twenty years beforehand, it was comforting to see him standing proud once again. His hair was much longer now, and while he had begun to show an uncanny resemblance to Lucius it was clear that he was much kinder than his senior ever was.
"I'll be looking forward to having you, Scorpius. If you're anything like your father I'm sure you'll have an absolutely exceptional gift for Charms. Though, between you and me," she leaned forward and whispered, "the closer you sit to the front, the less likely I'll make you answer questions. The lazy ones always sit in the back." Jane put a reassuring hand on the young Malfoy's shoulder as she stood to walk away.
"Jane..." Her name barely fell as a whisper from Draco's lips as she wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders.
"See, Draco? I told you you didn't have to be alone."
That was the last time they had spoken. For someone who had been so desperate to comfort him she was absolutely miserable at finding the words to do so. They had both been silent at Astoria's funeral. After the next four and a total of fifteen year at Hogwarts she was offered a position as Professor of Charms and Head of Wampus House at Ilvermorny in the United States. Jane left without much thought, as her busy teaching schedule kept her from maintaining many personal relationships. The change of scenery had been refreshing, and though Ilvermorny provided year-round housing to its staff she opted to live elsewhere. After more than forty years in notoriously gloomy England the promise of an arid climate was too good to pass up and soon she found herself living in the nearly alien landscape of Arizona. Due to the wide stretches of desert it was easy to conceal a thriving Wizarding community, but Jane still enjoyed time spent in the Muggle world – or No-Maj's as they were called there. That's why, with the Muggle location and 8,300 km difference, Jane thought she might be hallucinating when she received an owl from Draco Malfoy. With the trans-continental mail exchange she'd nearly missed the date he'd requested to meet her. It had been forwarded from her address at Ilvermorny since they were on Easter Break.
Jane met him the following day just outside of Phoenix at an odd land formation called Hole in the Rock. Needless to say, American Muggles weren't well known for their creativity when it came to naming things. Walking around the large red rock she scaled the back side to the opening. Draco sat on the carved steps, staring intently at the horizon. She didn't bother announcing herself, just sat down next to him and joined in silent observation.
"I wasn't sure you'd come."
"Even after all these years, I'll always be here if you need to talk, Draco. I am a little surprised you knew where to find me, though."
"I may have done some asking around." Jane switched her observation to the man sitting beside her. Still a bottle of firewhisky, that one. "What are you looking at, Wentworth?"
Jane laughed at the utter lack of malice that statement held. "Just you, Draco. You've cut your hair since we've last seen each other. That and I don't think I've ever seen you looking so – casual before. I thought for sure Muggle clothes would give you some sort of rash." A smirk tugged at his lips.
"I'll have you know I've begun to spend a fairly regular amount of time with the Muggles, robes stick out to much. As for my hair, call it a mid-life crisis maybe. I suppose it's like a fresh start." Elegant fingers cut through shorter hair that reminded Jane of sixth year.
"Draco Malfoy spending time with Muggles...now that you mention it I thought I saw a Pygmysnap fly the other day..."
What happened next Jane was sure was a figment of her imagination, but there Draco sat throwing his head back and releasing melodious laughter.
"Scorp misses you, you know. Says the new Charms teacher is a complete tosser."
"Merlin it's refreshing to hear someone talk like that, I'm lucky the students here don't understand half the slang I'm using otherwise I'd be on probation for sure. You tell Scorp he was always one of my favorites, and he's definitely better than his father ever was."
"You wound me, Wentworth."
"Poor thing, though I'm sure your fragile ego will recover." Again he smirked. "How's Scor doing? Shouldn't he be on break with you?" Draco mumbled something incoherently. "Sorry, what was that?"
"I said...he's on holiday...with the Potter's."
"With – with Harry Potter?"
"By association. Of all the people he could befriend...Albus Potter. Albus Severus Potter. Honestly, I don't know what Weasley was thinking when she let him name their children."
"Oh trust me, I know. I had his eldest, James Sirius, and just missed the youngest, Lily Luna. You think he knows there's other names to chose from? I remember how close those boys were, guess I'm just surprised you'd allow him to go with them." There was a moment of pointed silence before she continued. "So, what's motivated you to explore the Muggle world?"
"Anonymity, I suppose. Astoria," he frowned, "Astoria never cared much about what I had done in the past. We both came from a place of mutual understanding of pure-blooded involvement in the Wizarding Wars and both wanted to get away from it all. When we had Scorpius – I don't think I've ever felt more complete in my life. Astoria was more than forgiving, but Scorpius has only ever known the man I became after the war. When...when we lost her I lost that comfort too. Muggles are far less judgmental because they're completely oblivious to it all. With Scor at Hogwarts most of the year I suppose that's where it started. No one here looks at me with disgust if I slip and let this show." Draco flipped his left arm over, sneering at the Dark Mark marring his skin.
"For what it's worth," Jane sighed, covering as much of the Mark as she could with a reassuring hand, "I forgave you a long time ago. If you'd spoken to me during seventh year you would have known that."
"I should have assumed so much, you never were any good at staying away from me. I didn't really believe I had any place reaching back out to you after what happened during sixth year. To you there was a part of me that deserved saving, so I suppose I felt like I betrayed that faith you had in me. At the end of the day I was too busy – "
"Punishing yourself?"
"Something like that."
"You seem more...at peace now."
"I learned to forgive myself a long time ago. I can't undo the choices I made or fix the pain I've caused, but I've done everything I can to make up for it."
"And raised a wonderful son in the process. True to Malfoy form, he idolizes his father. He's a good man though, so as far as role models go I think, despite his shortcomings, he's definitely lucked out."
"Are you trying to butter me up, Wentworth?"
"I don't think your head could possibly get any bigger so I think we're safe."
There was a brief moment of silence between them before Draco started talking again.
"What about family for you? I admit I'm guilty of not knowing nearly as much about you these days."
"Oh...um, nothing special really. I never married, since that's what you're really asking." A slight blush crept to his cheeks. "I was really caught up in my work at the Ministry, that and Hogwarts and Ilvermorny aren't exactly teeming with bachelors, even Longbottom's married off now. I dated during the summers but they were never meant to last with my teaching schedule. It's never really bothered me much, I love what I do so I guess that's what made me feel complete." Jane sighed and chuckled. "Sometimes I wonder, though."
"About?"
"You. I wonder what might have happened had you not been such a git seventh year."
"Are you trying to say you fancied me?"
"Honestly, Draco, are you really surprised?"
"Not entirely, no. I guess I'm sorry to have tarnished my perfectly suave appearance with that stunt I pulled in the girls lavatory."
"No, I think that night was what finally did me in. Of course I'd thought you were attractive before, but I couldn't look at you the same after that night. I've only had my heart broken once before in my life, Draco Malfoy, and it was when you ran past me that night. You could have blown right through, but for just a second you gave me this look, like you wanted to stay but couldn't. Then you came back the next year and just – it was like I didn't exist. I suppose it could have been twice my heart was broken, again when you fled during the final battle, but I don't think a broken heart can break again. It was like this ridiculous unrequited love I didn't think I would ever get over."
"You did though."
"I did, until I saw you at Diagon Alley. It was a lot easier to believe I'd moved past it when you had disappeared from my life. But – each time I saw you all I could think of was this broken boy that I'd somehow managed to fall in love with despite him wanting nothing to do with me. That wasn't fair to either of us, that boy doesn't exist anymore, the boy that broke my heart is gone. I'm ok with that now, it was just a complicated thing to come to terms with."
"I didn't...It wasn't that I wanted nothing to do with you. My company just wasn't the safest to keep."
"Yeah, well," Jane smiled at Draco, "you try explaining that to a sixteen year old girl. You were never any good at discussing your feelings anyway."
"Would it –" Draco paused, "would it be all right if I visited again?" A knot in Jane's chest twisted.
"That...that sounds really nice, actually. If you'd like, you ought to bring Scorp some time too."
He smiled. "I think he'd like that. I would like that."
And there she is! I've been playing around with the idea of an adult Draco story since The Cursed Child book came out, poor guy breaks my frail fan girl heart. This fic also incorporated some of my favorite personal head canons currently:
1. What causes Draco's intense emotional breakdown is that with the Vanishing Cabinet still not repaired, Draco's first thought when he sees Katie Bell is that it's all over, he'll be discovered. His reaction has little to do with what that means for himself, instead agonizing over what will become of his mother who was already tortured because of his failures over Easter Break.
2. Draco seeking anonymity in the Muggle world. It wasn't really a believable thing for his character until TCC was released, and I think his loneliness after Astoria's death would be enough to push him there, especially since I'm sure he wouldn't dare seek interaction in a community that still identifies him with his wrong doings.
Anyway, let me know what you think! As of right now this is a completed story, but who knows, I might turn it into a sort of drabbly series of one shots...assuming that isn't an oxymoron.