STORY TITLE: Incinerated
CHAPTER TITLE: Miserable
WORD COUNT: 1,047
DISCLAIMER: I do not own QUEER AS FOLK, none of the characters or the places and events that have happened previously and sometimes with in my story. The QUEER AS FOLK people created them and I take no claim of them. However, my plot and these chapters and words are all mine.
RATING: M (Mature content= including a relationship between many gay sweaty men, mostly BRIAN AND JUSTIN-SO BEWARE.)
CHAPTER ONE:
Two years stuck in the never-ending rerun of his own life. It hadn't been kind to him either. Sure, his infamous looks and classic attitude hadn't changed much, but now at the age of twenty-six Brian Kinney is about to admit something for the first time in his life. "I'm lonely, you hear that world! I'm fucking lonely! BRIAN KINNEY IS LONELY!" His hands are thrown up as if in surrender to the heavens, not as if he believes in anything after death except the hopes of his form never aging and a particular blonde to accompany him for eternity in bed.
He shouts it loudly from the rooftop of his apartment building, earning quite a few 'SHUT THE FUCK UP's in the process. "Damn, two o'clock in the morning ain't what it used to be," Brian grumbles, sucking a drag from his hand rolled joint. Brian drops to the ledge, sitting heavily on the brick and trying to stifle a yawn. Even at the age of the thirty-six, the man is a vision, his perfectly kempt figure lounging aristocratically on the ledge as if it were a golden throne. There are minimal wrinkles around his eyes or mouth, possibly attesting to the fact that not many laughs had passed those lips during childhood, but that doesn't bother the auburn-haired man, his childhood was nothing to laugh about. Even his honey colored hazel eyes still have the glow of youth with in the depths, attracting even the attention of straight men to his curious nature. Yes, Brian Kinney had always been something of a mystery, no one quite understood what he was all about, not to mention his blatant blunt nature that seemed to precede him, but never seemed to dampen the line of girls desperate to date him. It seemed almost ironic that the man came out of the womb destined to be the best queer in the history of queers.
A quiet sigh sounds behind the stoned brunette, drawing his attention only slightly. "Brian if you miss him…like I know and everyone else know you do, then you should go visit him." The shot hits low, and Brian feels the air pushed out of him as he thinks of the past few years and how he only visited Justin in New York when the blonde boy had a show, and even then the brunette only snuck in and secretly visited, never letting on to Justin that he was ever there. It made him hollow inside to fall asleep every night without that familiar warmth beside him, huddled against his chest after a rather exuberant romp in the sack.
As much as Brian doesn't want to admit it he never would allow himself to see Justin because if he truly got the chance to touch him again, Brian would never let the boy go from his arms, and he would kidnap him back to Pittsburgh. He didn't mean those words he said to Justin about him being free to chose whichever path he decided, no, deep down in Brian's heart if it were his choice he would never let Justin leave the safety of his loft again. Of course, people have certain necessities and Brian's dreams of keeping Justin like a secret personal sex toy are just too inconvenient. Especially since Brian also has desires of showing off Justin as his and his alone.
"Mikey you're being ridiculous, queers aren't sharers, we suffer in silence. Fuck talk about feelings." Mikey expected the answer, knowing that had been the mantra Brian engrained in himself after the first time he had realized just how great being gay really was.
"Yeah, whatever Brian, ruin your life, you're just going to regret it." Michael hisses, pinching the bridge of his nose and exhaling hastily. Talking to Brian nowadays only seems to agitate the man, causing its own conflicts at home thanks to his sudden short temper. Ben however, has been more than accepting of the worry Michael has placed on Brian since Justin left.
Brian turns on him, standing from sitting on the ledge and stalking over to Mikey, his oldest friend, "Michael, I don't think you, the-the happy fucking faggot housewife, have any right to tell my how to run my life. These are my problems, my life, my fucking Justin. You don't have any fucking right sticking your nose into my business." Michael takes a step back from the whiplash, shocked at the sudden on-rush of Brian's anger.
The brunette man doesn't wait for a response, he pushes past Michael and walks down the apartment stairs heading back to his loft. His departure marks the end of the conversation in Mikey's eyes. So, the man turns to leave as well, and doesn't even bother stopping to check up on Brian, he just leaves, exhausted from the fight with his best friend. He grumbles all the way back to his house, and after stripping down to nothing, he slides into bed beside Ben and relaxes into the comforting heat of the man's back.
He lies awake for a few minutes, thinking, yet again, over the frustrating conversation with Brian. Michael lets his breath ghost over the bare flesh of Ben's neck and bites his lip at the thought of ever having to give the man up. His heart suddenly goes out to Brian, who is currently dealing with all that by himself. However, a flare of anger sparks in Michael at the thought that Brian is separating himself by choice, Mikey himself has been trying to get him to talk for ages, but the damn stubborn fool just wants to wallow in pain by himself.
/
Brian strips silently, shivering as the cold air hits his body. He finishes off the joint before laying down in his bed, over top the messy sheets, and staring at the ceiling. Hours pass before he closes his eyes and finally feels sleep trapping him, however, by then it is already five in the morning and the sun is already rising. Sunlight streams in through his huge windows, but still the brunette sleeps, his soft snores echoing through the empty loft. Somewhere in the air a blonde miserably curls up on a crowded plane, dreaming of the chance to see the brunette again.
Thanks for reading the first chapter to my new fic. Uhhhhhhm, so to explain something really fast, i posted two chapters of this before, but i accidentally screwed it up because
1. i wasn't quite happy with what i wrote
2. since i usually post late at night i for some reason posted a chapter of another story of mine that made absolutely no sense when you read the first chapter of this one annnnnndddd when i tried to fix it screwed up on me and so i dunno. I deleted the whole story and went back on the past two chapters and revised them until i liked them C:
Okay, now with that over PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW, I'm not going to say things like I write faster when you review, but it makes me happy to see people enjoying my story.
-Hana