~Paopu Ed~Ven's Story~
"You know, you should really try those games out. They're pretty fun." I could feel the uprising nausea blowing through my throat as my heartbeat hastened. Her eyes glistened with interest, probably because she loved video games too, not because she had noticed the deep thrumming coming from the very core of my being. She didn't notice the radiating heat pulsing off of my skin.
For a moment, I thought I was going to blow apart into little pieces from the tension.
"So, have you tried the new ice cream they have at the candy shop?"
"What?"
"The new ice cream they have? Sea-Salt Ice Cream?"
"Uh…n-no." I stuttered.
"Oh, well, we should go get some. I mean, the sweet shop is only five minutes away."
"Yeah." My mind trailed off again to what I had been thinking about before. The distant lapping of the waves gnawing at the shore calmed me just a little bit, their rhythmic, soothing tunes seemed to nullify the situation at hand. Along with that was the rustling of the lush lime fronds of the nearby palm trees and the distant calls of the seagulls. I could see them from where Aqua and I were, floating almost as if they were wisps of dandelion seeds drifting in the wind. A few of them neared the small islet we were on. We called it the play-islet since the local four-year-olds were often found there whacking their toy wooden swords at each other.
I remember the first time I met Aqua. We were back in preschool and it was 'snack time'. Every day the teacher would hand out either juice boxes or tiny cartons of plain and chocolate milk along with a warm chocolate chip cookie.
I could feel the presence of someone behind me. When I had fully turned around to look my eyes met no one's. I focused my attention back to the empty white napkin that sat on the table in front of me.
Where did my cookie go?
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
I saw his greasy black hair first. I looked downward and saw piercing green eyes and puffy red lips. Crumbs shot out of his mouth in a three-hundred and sixty degree radius, a few managing to meet my face. My left eye started to twitch. A huge, milky chunk of chewed up cookie slathered onto my forehead as Ricky cackled in delight. The glob left a trail of slime before it met the air between me and the floor. The icky brown goo splattered when it hit the dark blue carpeting next to my shoe. The longer I watched the crumbs fly, the more anger I felt. My fists began to tighten.
Water flooded into my eyes.
I'm not gonna cry. I'm not gonna cry. I'm not gonna-
A soft poke nudged my shoulder.
"Here."
A blue haired girl held a cookie out to me. As I looked into her face, I noticed the tears welling up in her eyes at the same time mine dried up. Her ocean blue eyes blinked and a lucid tear fell down her bright, rosy cheek.
"Well, aren't you going to eat it?"
"Uh…"
"Here." Before I could respond, she took the beige cookie filled with chunks of chocolate and shoved it into my mouth.
For the next few seconds all I could breathe in was baked dough and sugar. The girl turned around and chuckled, "You have to chew it."
Next to me, Ricky began to pout, "How come she gave you her cookie? I ask her all the time and she never gives me one."
"What's her name?" I asked the rat-faced boy. He steamed because I didn't answer his question. I mean, how was I supposed to know why the blue-haired girl had never given him a cookie?
"Aqua." Ricky muttered as he stumbled away on his skinny legs.
"Ven, Earth to Ven." I was shot back into the present because I had finally noticed the feminine, pale hand waving in front of my face.
What is it with that memory? It's so familiar…There's something more to it…
I glanced at Aqua in admiration. Her beauty…was so unique. I had never seen someone with such distinguishing features as Aqua. Her face a near oval but a little more thin, her nose tiny with a little point at the end.
The other stunning thing about her looks was her figure. She was extremely curvaceous with a shape almost like an hourglass. Well, not almost. It was an hourglass.
And last of all was her huge-
…..
Never mind that.
"Are you okay?" Her sudden question forced me to focus back to the matter at hand. I raised my hand to my hair and rubbed the blond spikes that were often made fun of by the other guys my age. That was probably why none of the girls really liked me at school…my hair was spiky enough to stab someone's eye out. But it didn't matter to me whether or not the other females noticed me as long as Aqua didn't think I was ugly.
"Yeah, um…I'm just a little tired."
Suddenly I had gotten the idea to surprise her. So, I started to talk about the most random thing I could've.
"You know what I don't get? How the stars can shine so brightly when they're so far apart and alone in the darkness."
Aqua cocked her head to the side to contemplate my question.
"I guess…"
We sat there in total silence for what seemed like ages as Aqua pondered the unknown. The brilliant, casting rays of the Sun were outlined in a rosy, warm color, as if it were a blanket slowly drifting down as the world as it settled in for nighttime. I could feel the warmth as the bright point of light began to dip into the water at the horizon, leaving a blazing trail of fire between us. At the very top edge of this scene was a deep splash of midnight blue with a little speck of white here and there. Silky bands of silver wove around and between each wave of navy, reminding me of its rightful name, the Milky Way.
She sniffled.
"I guess they just-"
A surge of courage burst through my chest as I readied to move my lips. Every time beforehand I had mustered up some bravery to ask her and utterly failed. But this time, though, I wasn't going to screw it up.
"Will you go out with me?"
Her blue eyes flashed with utter shock and disbelief.
Silence….
"What?" Her eyebrows rose as far as they could reach.
Oh great, now she's gonna say no. I knew it. This was totally the wrong time to ask.
When was there a right time?
"Um…" I shifted my position and put my right hand on my forehead, leaning over, my other arm acting as a support as I was weighed down by the awkward silence.
I sighed and repeated with pain, "Will you, uh, go out with me?"
Focusing on the ground helped me stave off the urge to glance at her face. I was scared to see anything negative.
Then, I heard the word, "Yes."
I kept staring down at the ground and thought about everything that had changed between me and her with just one word.
Fireworks sparked in the pit of my stomach and shot up into the recesses of my throat. All I could feel was glee and relief.
She said yes. Oh my God, she actually said yes.
Then I looked at her and saw the expectation in her eyes. I got scared.
What if I screwed up with her? Aqua wasn't just any girl. I knew she had high hopes for her first ever boyfriend. But who wouldn't?
Oh, God. Hell, I don't even know how to hold her hand.
A warm digit brushed up against my hand. Five fingers curled around mine and were held tightly for the next few moments. Then I jumped up and stood in front of her.
"What's wrong?" Her abandoned hand lifted to her chin in seeming puzzlement.
"Well, it's just that I…I…" The truth was that I needed….
"I'll go get some ice cream!"
"Well, wait for me!"
Both of us raced toward the boat. As soon as I was within a five-foot radius I dove into the wooden structure. I scrambled onto the seat and positioned my hair back into place. At that moment I didn't want to look scruffy in front of my girlfriend. I sat up to take my position at the oars. Once Aqua settled on the seat she reminded me, somewhat sullenly, that she was supposed to paddle us over to the main island on the way back, since I had done it on the way there.
"Oh well, you can get us here tomorrow or something." The truth was that I needed something to keep me busy and work out the rising constriction in my throat. My hands tightened and loosened rhythmically in a pattern, a few seconds for each, before I grabbed the wooden poles and rowed like crazy.
Within about two minutes we were already nearing the shore of the main island. Aqua seemed concerned.
"Are you okay?"
"I…really don't know."
She sighed with impatience.
Please don't tell me that I made her mad…anything but that.
I tried to steer her attention elsewhere. "We should try that new flavor you were talking about. Sea-something or other?"
"Sea-Salt Ice Cream."
Once inside the candy shop I handed the munny over to the elderly lady at the counter. She glanced down at the pitiful amount in her hand and shook it a bit.
"You call this forty-two mun-"
"Here." Giving up, I reached into the empty depths of my pocket to scrounge around for some cash. I found nothing.
"Here you go, ma'am." Aqua dropped the remaining difference into the woman's palm. The wrinkles on the old woman's face flexed as she grinned.
"What a pretty little thing you are. You're lucky you have a girl like that, cheapskate." She poked my chest with force, hurting me a little bit. I wondered how she knew that we were going out.
What? Is she a mind reader, or something? I mean, is it that obvious? It's not like I have a sign on my chest that says, "Boyfriend of girl standing next to me.". I'm already being criticized as boyfriend material.
"He's not a cheapskate, are you Ven?" It made me happy that Aqua still stuck up for me after all these years.
"I guess not."
"You're also lucky that she looks past your flaws." The old lady budged back into the conversation.
"Well, she's the only one that does." I admitted back to her in response.
She handed Aqua and I each a stick topped with a cerulean chunk of water and sugar, frozen, of course.
I licked the side of the thing and stood there, awed at the taste.
"Salty, but…sweet?"
"Yeah, it's supposed to be a mix of sea salt and saltwater taffy."
"Yeah, it seems like it. Let's go to the docks." Well, I wouldn't of minded going somewhere else, but getting away from the critical old lady was my first priority.
"Okay."
The path to the docks was nearby. Well, nothing was really far from anything on this miniscule island. Sand kicked up behind us as we wandered toward the main shore at a moderate pace. Aqua folded her arms around her back as we strolled. At least she wasn't trying to spring another hand-lock on me. Not that it was all that bad, but I didn't think I was ready for anything like that. I suddenly just didn't feel that ready to be a boyfriend, either, even though I liked Aqua a lot. Was that how relationships went? I didn't have any older brothers to give me pointers, thus, I was doomed to learn everything on my own.
"Here." Aqua sat down at the edge of the wooden dock and patted the spot next to her. I made my way over and plopped down.
We sat there in silence for a while. Then Aqua started talking. I didn't really hear her words since I was too busy carving our initials into the piece of plank next to me with my bare popsicle stick.
A and V.
The seagull's calls and the swishing of waves seeping back into the ocean faded from my hearing as the memory of that first day faded out.
------------------------------------------------
I found myself needing advice. It had been a few weeks since I had asked Aqua to be my girlfriend. I hadn't seen her since. Not because she had moved away but because I was afraid to see her.
Hey, don't call me a wimp. It's just that I thought if I saw her again, I would say something stupid or mess up with her. You know, make her angry and hate me.
School started a week after I asked her to be my girlfriend. I attended the first few days, but I avoided Aqua that whole time. When the rumors began to fly, as they always do, I found it hard to make it back to school every day. I started to play hooky.
While moping at home, I called all of my friends daily to see if there was any news about Aqua. I also asked them to tell her that I was sick with some horrible flu, or a cold.
She sent me a get-well card.
I felt really bad about avoiding her, especially when she sent me the card. As the days rolled on, I found myself more and more uptight about facing her. Sooner or later I had to, though.
Once that day came I checked my school schedule again – I had forgotten since the last time I'd been there - and noticed the words, "Physical Ed" in the first hour slot. I headed towards the back of Destiny High and slunk into the boys' locker room, my gym uniform in hand. The first face I saw was Terra's. He had been my best bud, besides Aqua, since I was about four. Terra tapped the green locker next to his and grinned, "Saved one for you."
I dropped my giant stack of books and the uniform on the faded wooden bench in the middle of two rows of metal lockers. The padlock clanked as it was rammed against the door, then it made a grinding noise as I finished putting in the last number for the code. Before I could grab it, the padlock fell to the floor.
"Here." Terra bent over and tossed the lock into my left hand.
"So, I heard you're Aqua's boyfriend now. How come you didn't tell me?" He raised his dark eyebrow in suspicion.
"Yeah, I told you. Remember? Like almost a million times?"
"No duh! Of course I remember. Who wouldn't? Well, more like who couldn't? You remind me almost every second of the day."
I looked to my feet in embarrassment. Did I really talk about her that much? It was almost as if Terra had read my mind, for he said, "You really do talk about her a lot."
Once he was finished putting on his signature uniform, literally filled with signatures from his football team, he left me standing in the locker room alone. None of the other students had arrived. Silence echoed.
"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you," Terra suddenly slapped his powerful hand on my right shoulder. I jumped.
"Don't screw up," he said.
I heard his cackle cascade through the room as he entered the hallway leading to the gym.
Nervousness collected like dust in my throat, causing me to swallow hard with the rising tension. I was so scared. I mean, really, really scared. Like, evil creepy old man with yellow eyes armed with a gun and/or some sort of weapon standing in front of you with the intent of murder scared. I thought about staying in the locker room for the rest of my life, meeting no one and curling up to die alone. Sadly, it wasn't possible. Terra would've found me and dragged me out to face everyone. Even the popular kids would come from their corners to make fun of me. They'd call me freak, or r-tard, or worst of all….
A wimp.
For some reason, that insult got to me much easier than the countless others. Maybe it was because I was actually smaller than most and it had a slight bit of truth to it.
When I got to the gymnasium, I saw her. Aqua stood talking to Jackie Daily in the middle of the wooden floor. Jackie was a very tall girl who had consumed her fair share of doughnuts. My girlfriend twiddled her feet and glanced at the ground every now and then, seeming uncomfortable talking to Jackie Daily.
I wasn't so sure that I trusted Jackie, really, but she had gotten me out of a few tight spots in the past.
Courage suddenly welled up in my chest and urged me to walk up to the pair.
"Hey, Aqua. How are you?"
Aqua gave me a big, tight hug. Well, at least I thought she would've. She just stood there and smiled sweetly instead. That was something she was good at.
The Phy Ed teacher yelled an order with strictness, "Choose your partners for today, class. You'll be needing them."
Before I could get to Aqua, Jackie beat me, "Aqua? Do you wanna be my partner?"
Aqua coughed a few times before she answered, "Uh…well," She paused mid-sentence to glance at me and shrug.
"I guess so."
"Great!" Jackie grabbed Aqua's hand and ran off with her to the other side of the gym where everyone was lining up.
I felt sick all of a sudden. Was this really how my relationship with Aqua was going to be? The farther she made the distance between us, the more stomach pain I felt. I decided that I should sit down somewhere. If I didn't, I would've hurled in front of everyone.
I plopped down next to the nearest wall and listened to my stomach lurch and gurgle. If I didn't make it to the nurse's in the next few minutes, the gym floor would be all of the colors of the rainbow.
Jackie ran over, "What's wrong?"
"I need to go to the nurse's."
I couldn't believe it! Jackie had gotten to me before Aqua. I mean, didn't Aqua even care about me? I guess not.
"Teacher, I'm taking Ven to the nurse's office!" Before I could even flinch, Jackie wrapped her flabby arm around my waist and chucked me over her shoulder. Due to her height and size, my feet and hands were dangling five feet from the ground. Since I was too queasy to protest, I was hauled off at a rapid pace with Jackie sprinting as we headed down the long hallway.
"You didn't really have to do that, you know."
"I know, it's just that Aqua wasn't going to do it. " She stopped to spit. "So I thought I should."
The Kemp's ice cream bucket's handle clanked as the nurse dropped it in front of me. I hurled into the clear plastic as the world began to spin. The nausea came in unbearable waves. I had nearly filled the bucket.
In between two sessions of hurling, I saw Aqua slowly walk past in the hallway. Our eyes locked. She stopped momentarily, but was rushed ahead by a group of skater kids behind her.
Jackie noticed this and patted my back, "Don't worry, Ven, I'm here for you, even if she isn't."
Those words began to sting as they settled into my heart. Was Jackie suggesting that Aqua wouldn't back me up in a situation where it was needed? I didn't know that Jackie knew my girlfriend that well. The thought of Aqua's potential betrayal caused my stomach to churn again.
I bent over the bucket and lost some more of my breakfast.
"Well, I got to get to class now, but just remember…." Jackie slapped her huge hand on my back and made me hurl again. Wow, she was even more powerful than Terra…
"I'm here if you me for anything, especially if you need advice about Aqua." She shook her head and clicked her tongue as she trampled out of the room.
Despite what Jackie had implied, I decided still try to have a relationship with Aqua, regardless of what had happened between us up to this point.
---------------------------
The smells of cotton candy, hot dogs, and fried pickles on a stick wafted into my nose as my girlfriend and I wandered about the local fair that they had every year near the beginning of the school year. We decided to go at the last minute. It was Aqua's idea. Usually last minute stuff was my category, but I guess not in this case.
"Hey, let's go on the Ferris Wheel." Aqua pointed to the looming circular ride that lit up the Friday night sky. The last load of kids were just getting off.
"C'mon!" Aqua begged me. The truth was that I really didn't want to go on the most boring and cheesy ride in the whole park, but she insisted. Plus, I could be alone with Aqua and make sure that all the other guys our age in the park weren't staring at her.
"Okay, but we have to go to the burping contest afterwards. I've been waiting for that for ages."
"All right." Aqua agreed.
Metal clanked as we jerked back and forth. The operator started the ride up.
Aqua moved her hand towards mine slowly. I still wasn't too comfortable with the idea of holding hands, even though it had been a while since she first tried it. When her index finger touched mine, I instantly took it away and settled it down in my lap. She seemed to flinch at this, obviously disappointed at her failed attempt.
Suddenly, an idea popped up in my head. I decided that I was going to slip my hand under her butt.
We were going downwards and Aqua was fixated on some far off horizon or some star. I took the chance and copped a feel. Instantly my hand landed back in my lap.
Aqua cleared her throat and raised her eyebrow at me.
I shrugged at her and grinned. Sadly, she was not amused.
Crap. Why did I do that? Now she hates me even more than before. Maybe if I win the burping contest, I'll make it up to her.
Yeah, that'll make it better.
The Ferris Wheel lurched and came to a stop. Aqua leaped out of the compartment and ran off before I could even move, probably mad at me. I didn't really understand why.
The burping contest was crowded with a bunch of chumps who decided Aqua was eye candy. I wanted to beat them to prove I was the better man.
Myself and the other guys all puffed our chests up in anticipation.
The first guy only managed to let out a lame squeak. Boy, I felt bad for him. It was so pathetic I couldn't even laugh.
The second guy, a tall, lanky dude with a fake pirate hat on, managed to let out a considerably large belt of raunchy air, but it wasn't enough to scare me. Heck, none of these useless tards could best me. I practiced with Terra at home all the time and always won. And that's saying a lot since Terra was known in our group as the best, at least before I came along.
Aqua shuffled her feet and looked off into the distance with pink etching the outlines of her cheeks. I patted her back and whispered, "You just wait until it's my turn."
"Um…all right." She glanced around, her eyes darting to and fro.
A mug filled to the brim with root beer was handed to me. I smiled and gulped down humongous amounts of sugary carbonated goodness and waited for the inevitable.
Every single head turned my way with a decided look of disgust as I belched to the heavens and sky.
Some little kid's ice cream slid off his cone as he walked past, obviously disturbed by the thunderous amps of my burp.
The guy who was up next stood there in awe and began to sweat. Intimidated by my prowess, all he could manage was a miniscule gum flapper. I had won the contest.
I hadn't paid attention to what the prize was since I was too busy dissing the other contestants. The contest announcer raised my hand and yelled into his microphone, "Ventus Toshi is the winner! Here he stands before you, the biggest swine in all of Destiny Islands!"
The crowd of onlookers and my new fans cheered as I cracked a smirk and raised my arms. All the other teenage guys who were in the contest gathered around me and slapped my back even harder than Jackie had, which was saying a lot.
A colossal orange tabby cat plushie was tossed at me by the spokesperson. I was surrounded by a ton of felines at home. (I was adopted by an old cat lady when I was young, since my parents died when I was an infant), so I decided to give it to Aqua. I handed the behemoth kitty over to Aqua. For the first time ever that day, she finally smiled. She also kissed it. Aqua thanked me with affection underlying her tone.
That should be me. Stupid cat, I shouldn't have given it to her. I mean, she'd rather hug and kiss a stuffed piece of crap than me?
To make matters worse, she stuck her new "friend" in between us on the scrambler ride and kept rubbing her cheek against its fluffy white paw.
Suddenly someone sneezed and a huge glob of sticky goo hit my cheek. I instantly raised my hand and pulled it away to see a huge web of snot.
I couldn't let Aqua see it. I had to get rid of it fast.
"Ugh!" The giant booger resisted the first hard flick. You'd think that since we were on a fast, spinning ride it would've gave up and flew away. I saw my girlfriend's head turning towards me in slow motion. It was kinda like one of those things you see on TV where everything is happening slowly and someone is yelling, "Noooooooo!" with a deep voice.
I gave its vile presence another tough toss and it landed on the kitty's plush paw.
Another one of those slow motion "Noooooooooo!"'s happened as Aqua took the paw and rubbed it against her face. The gooey green glob stuck to her blue hair and I was too afraid to attempt an extraction or tell her.
Later as we were walking towards the exit of the fair Aqua hugged the kitty again and said "It's so cute!" The snot was still in her hair but had dried into a stiff hank on the side of her head.
---------------------------------
I don't know what certain event triggered the outcome that followed. In my mind, I wished I had a do-over. But I still have yet to figure out all the details of everything.
It's funny how much time you have to think when you're stuck in what seems like eternal silence.
After the fair incident, my relationship with Jackie somehow became more of a dependency than I had expected. I had absolutely no idea of how to be a great boyfriend. I came to depend on her for advice. I thought that since she had the mind of a girl, Jackie would help me get closer to Aqua.
---------------------------------
"God, you're so helpless, Ven! I guess I'm going to have to do everything for you."
We were standing outside in the field next to the cafeteria, leaning up against the wall. The supervisors of the lunchroom let the kids out once in a while if the weather outside was nice. Today was one of those days.
Jackie shook her head next to me and scoffed, "You know, you can't do anything rightwith Aqua without me."
She's right. I can't make Aqua happy without her help. I feel so stupid…
During that whole day, Aqua hadn't talked to me at all. She didn't even give me her usual smile when she trailed past me during passing time in between first and second hour. It was making me uncomfortable.
"The best way to get your girlfriend's attention is to make her jealous. Then she'll stop ignoring you."
"Do you really think that's the way to do it? What if she gets mad at me?" I was beginning to feel a little awkward. This was definitely uncharted territory for me. But I guess I'd do anything for Aqua to start liking me again.
"Of course! Now, just listen and do what I say."
----------------------------------
Although I felt that Jackie was helping me, some of the things she suggested were kinda weird. But what else did I have to go on? I had to trust her. I thought these techniques were working since Aqua gave me a bear hug one day. Later, Jackie said to me, "What was she trying to do? Kill you? All I saw was a death hug."
Would Aqua really try to kill me? No, Jackie was just joking, of course.
"Oh yeah, Ven. Here's another tip: when you're around your friends, like Terra or me, act like you don't care about Aqua. That'll get her attention."
The next day when Aqua met me in homebase I did exactly as Jackie told me and kind of ignored Aqua. Then one time when Aqua tried to pass me a note in class, I wrote back to her, "Don't write me anymore notes. It's getting annoying.". The truth was I really liked it when she flirted with me by note, and I felt bad afterwards. To loose up some tension, I flirted back with her after class. Shortly afterward Jackie asked about Aqua again and how it was going between us.
"I think it's getting better-"
"No it isn't. Here's what you do."
I nodded.
"Okay, there's a school dance coming up. When you're there with her, talk to me and some other girls and make sure she's watching. Then when it's time to go, give me a hug before you leave with her."
I sighed. "All right."
---------------------------
During the dance I did exactly as Jackie had said. I guess it worked, but Aqua became even more distant with me. Was this really how it was supposed to be?
Jackie also changed a bit. She began to threaten suicide when I told her I wasn't sure I needed her advice anymore and told me things that were very strange, like that she had seen Abraham Lincoln's ghost at our local library.
I talked to Aqua about Jackie's bizarre behavior and asked her what she would do. All that Aqua recommended was taking Jackie to the school counselor. I didn't do it since I felt that would be betrayal, and Jackie had helped me.
A few weeks later we started our kickball unit in gym. I was on the bench and Aqua was in the outfield. During our entire childhood, Aqua hadn't been too much into sports, and kickball was, in fact, her most hated activity.
She'd been ignoring me pretty much the whole day and I was upset with her. Suddenly, the kickball was shot at her. Aqua instantly jumped for it but inevitably missed.
I got the idea to insult her. I stood up and cupped my hands around my mouth and screamed, "Come on! How could you even miss that?!"
Even from my position I could see the resentment in her eyes. Droplets began to fall down her cheeks and glint in the early morning sunlight. Her eyesight met mine, but only for a fleeting moment, for she turned away.
The teacher ordered some of the outfielders to get into line to bat. Well, kick I guess, in this case. Aqua was one of them.
I was also told to get a place in line. When I got there I lined up behind Aqua.
"Hey."
She turned to look at me, but then swiftly moved her eyes to stare at a vacant spot.
"You can go in front of me." She said.
"Why?"
"Because I suck."
Her words bit at me. I felt sort of bad about it afterwards. But I did exactly as Jackie decreed. Why was Aqua so vexed?
That night Aqua called me on the phone and dumped me. I played it cool and everything when I was still talking to her but as soon as she hung up, I stuck my foot in the wall. Literally, I made a gaping hole in the cloud-colored wall in my living room with my huge foot. My adopted grandmother came wobbling out of her room to see what was wrong and started chastising me when she saw the hole.
How could something that I had wanted to go so well go so totally wrong?
Quite a few days later when I had managed to actually drag myself out of the house again, I stormed outside and found myself unconsciously roaming towards the dock where Aqua and I had shared Sea-Salt Ice Cream; where I'd carved our initials.
I had forgotten about them until now. Those two letters…they had been so important to me that first day. I had abandoned what was dear to me and began to forget, I had lost everything. And I still didn't understand.
I ran my fingers across the carved letters and realized that I had done exactly what I had yearned not to do; exactly what I had feared the most.
"Don't screw up."