Dear diary,
Today I saw a butterfly. It made me happy inside, until my stupid dog ate it. I tried to tell my older brother, you know the one that is the king and all, but he just called me a pussy and said that he had better things to do than listen to his brother cry. I take his calling of me a pussy because cats are great and classy animals… MOAR CATZ! Also, I lost the game. I was still crying in the corner when Elise was staring at my smoking hot abs probably craving me like you know dem bitches do. I won't be able to talk to you tomorrow because I have the feeling that Sir Walter won't let me bring you on our trip.
Love,
The Hero of Brightwall
P.S. I hate how my dad named me this. Oh well, I guess it's better than chicken chaser.