Chapter 1: Surrendering

Anderson had taken control of the Normandy a few hours ago and ordered the ship to Omega. Shepard couldn't fathom why they would be going to the pisshole of the galaxy, especially right now. Earth was where she was to be tried and prosecuted as a war criminal. Omega seemed like an unusual detour. But, she wasn't in charge anymore and she didn't have the will to question Anderson.

She sat on the cot that was once Jack's and stared at her hands. The Normandy didn't have an official brig so the small storage space seemed a decent place to keep a prisoner. They even omni-cuffed her, per Alliance regulations. She stared at her hands for hours, trying to remind herself that the handcuffs were just a formality. Anderson actually looked like he was in pain when he put them on her. He kept them loose, far too loose for any other prisoner, but he knew Shepard. She was honorable and didn't deserve what she was getting. She wouldn't run, she wouldn't hide. She made the best decision with the information she had and she would face the consequences like a true soldier.

Her honor didn't stop her from wanting to remove the cuffs though. She willed herself to continue to sit patiently and stare at her hands. She would be strong and would face whatever the Alliance had to throw at her. She was Commander Shepard, Hero of the Citadel, First Human Spectre, and she just saved the galaxy from the Collectors and postponed a Reaper invasion. She would be the paragon of humanities strength, even if she wanted to break down like a small child. Now was not the time to lose it.

She heard EDI announce that Anderson and the shore party had returned and steeled herself for what might happen next. Her gut was churning and she swallowed bile. She desperately wished that she had asked Joker what the hell they were doing on Omega. In her head, she knew this was probably some unrelated Alliance business. But, there was a sinking feeling in her heart that, somehow, she might be turned over to the Batarians as some form of political appeasement.

Her thoughts turned to Elysium. She tried to remind herself that Anderson had her back. He would fight tooth and nail to ensure her safety. The Batarians just need to see her punished, they didn't need to do the actual punishing. She would never have to face their particular brand of brutality again.

"Hey Shepard?" Joker's voice interrupted her morbid thoughts and she tried to calm her nerves before responding.

"I don't think you're supposed to talk to the prisoner Joker." She replied coolly.

"Yeah well…" he let his voice trail off before he continued. "Just thought you might like to know; Anderson is heading your way. Figured a heads up wouldn't hurt."

"Thanks Joker." She managed to reply. She knew that he warned her so that she could build some composure. Joker knew that this was rock bottom for Shepard and that she wouldn't want anyone to see her falling apart. He would never say it outright but he was probably the only person who knew how she was feeling. He had lost the Normandy and everything he had cared about when he was grounded. Now, Shepard was facing the same fate.

Shepard hadn't even noticed when Anderson walked through the door. She only looked up when she heard several sets of steps begin to descend the stairs to her informal prison.

Anderson looked as professional as ever. His dress blues were pressed and only the slightest bit of grime hinted at the fact that he had been on Omega. He made eye contact with Shepard and smiled. The smile lit up his features in a way that made him look as if he were ten years younger. Shepard missed that smile. She saw that smile in some of her fondest memories; the day she joined the alliance, the day she made N7, and when she was appointed to be a Spectre. Anderson had been there for all the important milestones in her life. It was only fitting that he was finally there for a low point.

She turned her attention briefly to the marine that was following Anderson. He was a tank in human skin, built like a fucking mountain. He seemed upset and was bleeding? Shepard suddenly was confused as to why Anderson had brought this man to meet her. He needed to see Chawkwas about the gash on the side of his head. Seemed odd to come meet her first considering she was a prisoner and wasn't going anywhere.

Shepard barely caught the end of their conversation in time to understand what was happening.

"You're not far off Lieutenant. Only, you'll be guarding the brig. One prisoner in particular." Anderson sounded almost amused but Shepard couldn't find the humor in the situation. It was slowly starting to hit her that her career, and everything she had ever cared about, were being stripped away.

The Lieutenant seemed to see her for the first time after Anderson had finished speaking.

"Commander… Shepard?" He seemed at a loss and Shepard found it endearing. For a lot of marines, she was the goal. Most grunts either wanted to be her, or sleep with her. She wondered if the man in front of her had either of those intentions. She looked him over studying the nasty cut he had on the side of his head. He wasn't in uniform and seemed to have just been in a fight. Shepard wondered briefly why he had been on Omega and why Anderson specifically chose him for guard duty.

She offered him a grin as she responded. "That's me… at least for now. I'm pretty sure they're going to take my rank." Her heart sank as she said the words. She knew they were going to strip her of her title and it hurt her to her core. She tried to recover with humor as she added "I would shake your hand but…" She lifted her hands to highlight the cuffs connecting them.

Anderson cut in to introduce them. "Shepard this is Lieutenant James Vega, hell of a marine. Kind of reminds me of you." There was laughter in his voice and Shepard consciously forced a smile in response. Her heart was aching but she would put on a show of strength for everyone else.

"Nice to meet you Lieutenant." She managed to say with practiced ease.

James on the other hand was star struck. His mouth opened and closed a few times like a fish before he managed a response.

"It's nice to meet you too ma'am." He punctuated his words with a quick salute. Only afterwards did he realize how obnoxious it all seemed given the circumstances.

Shepard wanted to groan in response but buried the urge.

"You can call me Shepard. Anderson can attest to the fact that I hate formalities."

Anderson smiled and allowed himself to chuckle deeply before he responded. "She takes after me in more ways than I care to admit."

Shepard rolled her eyes as if she were a teenager frustrated with her parents. Anderson always found the opportunity to tease her.

"You and my mother Anderson… You both will be the death of me." Anderson feigned offense at Shepard's jibe.

James stood in stunned silence. Anderson and Shepard went way beyond the traditionally military friendship. It made James feel like an outsider and shifted uncomfortably as he stood next to them. Anderson seemed to noticed and straightened; looking suddenly more like the admiral he was. He turned his attention to Vega and began to lay out his assignment.

"All right, here's the deal. The Alliance will be investigating the incident with the Alpha relay. Shepard will likely be court martialed as a result but I am going to do everything in my power to make sure it goes in her favor. During the investigation, the brass has decided the confine her to house arrest on Earth. She will be provided a small apartment in Alliance HQ. She is not allowed to leave the apartment without an escort and is not allowed to leave HQ without the express permission of myself or Admiral Hackett. Understood so far?"

James provided a curt not in response.

"Okay, good. James, you are Shepard's guard. You aren't there to keep her in, I know she'll do that on her own. You are there to keep the threats out. Reporters, Cerberus, and the Batarians would all love to get their hands on Shepard. You are the last line of defense. As such, you will also be staying in the apartment with Shepard. When she's awake, you're awake, understood Lieutenant?"

"Yes sir. Permission to speak freely sir?" James was gnawing on the inside of his cheek. Everything about this situation seemed wrong to him and he hoped that Anderson would allow him the opportunity to work through his questions.

"Granted." Anderson knew this wasn't an easy task and James was still dealing with his own demons. Allowing him the opportunity to express his concerns now would prevent issues later.

"If anyone in the galaxy can defend themselves, it's the Commander. Why does she need me to guard her?" Shepard noted the insecurity in James' voice. She turned to Anderson to see what he would say.

"Shepard won't be allowed a gun, armor, or any communication devices. Hell the brass will probably try to restrict her biotics." Shepard scoffed, causing both men to turn their attention to her.

"I'd like to see them try." She chided.

"Careful what you wish for Jane." Anderson's voice was soft and full of remorse. He continued after a brief pause. "Shepard is a hell of a soldier but she won't be able to take on everything, especially when they take away most of her defenses. Hell, she won't even be able to call for help. You are there to do all the things Shepard can't on her own if an emergency arises. You will have several guards at your disposal who carry night shifts and cover for you when other duties arise. You will get to meet them when we land in Vancouver. Think you can handle this Vega?" Anderson eyed the young marine intently.

No. I'm a terrible soldier and I should be the one locked up.

James swallowed hard, burying all his apprehension. He was going to be living with and defending Commander Jane Shepard. How the hell could he say no? He dreamed of serving with her for years and while the current situation was not what he expected, he would take it.

"Yes sir!" James replied with almost too much enthusiasm. It was Shepard's turn to chuckle. Anderson turned to her in response with a stern look on his face.

"Play nice, Commander." She sat a little straighter under his gaze as if she had just been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

"I always do Anderson." She winked at James as the words left her lips and he felt the heat radiate through his cheeks. Anderson responded to her jest with mock frustration.

"You are never going to make things easy for me are you?" He moved toward the stairs as if to leave before adding, "Shepard, the cuffs can come off for now but the Lieutenant will have to put them back on when we reach Earth. Vega, your duties start now. Stick to Shepard like glue until she is safely in her apartment on Earth. I don't expect trouble yet but I would like to be prepared for it all the same. I am going to speak with Joker and the rest of the crew. We should reach Sol in a few hours." With those words, Anderson nodded and left.

Shepard had the cuffs off before Anderson finished speaking the words. She laid them on table across from the cot and returned to her seat. James stood at parade rest near the stairs and Shepard tried hard not to laugh at him. He seemed lost, deep in his own thoughts.

"Lieutenant?"

"Yes ma'am?" He responded with military precision like any marine speaking with their CO. She had just said to call her Shepard, maybe she could use this to break the ice.

"First of all, stop calling me ma'am. It's Shepard, or if you really need to be formal Commander. Although, I don't know how long you'll get to call me that. Enjoy the opportunity while you can I guess…" Her thoughts shifted to melancholy and she almost forget what she was trying to accomplish. "Anyway, I seriously hate that ma'am shit. Secondly, you can sit down. Anderson said you had to guard me, he said nothing about killing your back while you do it." She tried her best to smile but it never quite reached her eyes. She continued trying to ease the tension in the room by flirting with the marine. "Although, given your…uh, impressive physique, I'm sure there are lots of things you can do for hours on end." She winked at him again and was rewarded as he shifted uncomfortable.

James was dumbfounded for a moment. Did Commander Shepard just come on to him? No, he knew better. This was her attempt as diffusing tension. He had seen it before. Marines under stress became shameless flirts in an attempt to calm themselves. He knew this assignment was going to be a long stint. He also knew that if Shepard was anything like him, she would hit rock bottom a few times while on house arrest. James resolved to be there for her no matter what. Commander Shepard had been the reason he wanted to be a good Marine. The least he could do was keep her sane. He felt himself relax as he made his way to her and sat down on the cot.

Shepard's eyes widened slightly as she was lifted off her seat for a moment. James was less than a foot away from her, the cot they shared wasn't exactly roomy. This vantage point gave Shepard a more intimate view of the man she'd be living with for who knows how long. James was physically impressive. Shepard couldn't fathom how someone could bulk up that much on military rations. She watched a smirk play at the corner of his mouth before he turned to her to speak.

"Anything in particular you have in mind?" The devilish grin on his face made her body react in ways she wasn't expecting. She pushed the thoughts aside.

"Wouldn't you like to know Lieutenant?" She put on her best sultry voice and waited for Vega's reaction. But as quickly as the flirting had started it was over. Shepard was briefly disappointed. This was the first time she felt like a normal woman in a long time. Everyone saw her as Commander Shepard, badass extraordinaire. Very few people took the time to get to know her as a person. Almost no one was interested in her as a woman, at least no sane people.

"You can call just call me James." He interrupted her thoughts.

"Okay James, how did you end up with shitty guard duty?" He visibly tensed at the question. Fehl Prime flooded his mind and he was suddenly angry again. He shouldn't be guarding Shepard. He couldn't even guard the colonists. James knew that the silence was drawing on for too long. He didn't know what to say. He felt like he made the wrong decision. Shepard stopped the Collectors, he should have saved the colonists. He pinched the bridge of his nose to relieve the pressure building there. The silence stretched out between them until Shepard spoke again a few moments later.

"Tough call?" She knew the instant the tension was in his shoulders that he was dealing with a bad mission. She had more of those than she would care to admit so she knew what the fall out looked like. This was probably why he was her guard. Anderson had a knack for finding the people who didn't crack under pressure; who knew how to make the right call even when it felt like shit. How many times had she been in James' shoes?

The silence stretched on for a few more moments before James could bring himself to speak.

"Yeah…" It was all he could mutter. It was all still too raw for him to talk about openly and he doubted if he could ever really tell Shepard what happened. His intel was moot because she was kicking Collector ass. Deep down, part of him blamed her for making him waste lives. He knew that she wasn't at fault and it wasn't fair for him to pin his shortcomings on her, but he couldn't help it.

"We all have a few of those…" Her tone was solemn and she looked like she was reliving the ghosts of her own past. James watched in awe as he saw the emotions play out on her face. She had built walls up around herself. Every interview or promo vid showed Commander Shepard, badass savior of the galaxy. This was the woman behind the act, the marine who had to make tough calls and live with herself after. James felt like he was intruding on a private moment and looked away.

They sat in silence for over an hour.

"I wish we had a deck of cards or something." James uttered half-heartedly. He always played poker when he was trying to escape his own thoughts. He could just focus on the game and allow himself a little peace. He didn't even notice that Shepard lit up next to him. She knew Jack had cards down here. She was always trying to win money off the crew. Shepard guessed that Jack liked getting a little bit of payback against Cerberus in any way she could.

"We do have cards." She returned to the cot triumphantly and began to shuffle the deck. "What's your game Vega?"

"Poker." He began to move crates to either side of the table in the room. Shepard perched herself so that she could see both entrances to her prison. James was impressed. If she hadn't sat there first, he would have because he could see any potential threats coming. Shepard spoke, breaking him from his thoughts.

"What, no Skyllian Five?" She smiled as she spoke and James noted her features for the first time. Well, he had noted her features many times before, her face was everywhere in the Alliance. But, this was the first time she looked human. She wasn't larger than life, only her accomplishments made people see her that way. She was just a person, with too much weight on her shoulders. He could relate to that feeling.

"Nah Shepard. Poker reminds me of home." It was sincere. Skyllian Five was fun and everyone in the galaxy knew how to play, regardless of their homeworld. But, for James, poker reminded him of his uncle and all the things he loved about home.

"Fair enough." She didn't really care what they played, she was just happy for the distraction.

She passed him the deck so that he could set up and was suddenly aware that his head was still bleeding.

"Hey EDI, can you send Chawkwas down here? James has a pretty nasty gash that needs to be looked at." She knew he couldn't leave and since she was pretty sure she could escort him to the crew deck, this would have to do. The metallic voice answered through the ceiling.

"She's on her way Shepard." James was suddenly self-conscious. He had almost forgotten the fight he was in a few hours before.

"I'm good Shepard. It'll take a lot more than this to keep me down." James hated seeming weak and he couldn't hide the defensiveness in his tone.

"I'm sure" she nodded as she spoke. "But I am going to have to spend a lot of my time looking at you. So, I'm going to do everything in my power to protect your pretty face." He smiled in response to her remarks.

"It'll take more than that to make me blush." He jokingly shot back at her.

"I'll keep trying." She was smiling now. There was genuine joy in her expression but it still didn't quite reach her eyes.

Their card game was set up just as Dr. Chawkwas was coming down the stairs. She made short work of caring for James. Reprimanded him for not seeking medical attention as soon as he was on the ship and then made her way back to the medbay.

They began their game in companionable silence. Both were lost deep in dark thoughts. James studied the Commander. She was chewing the inside of her lip. Normally he would see this as a tell that she was bluffing. But, she had been doing it non-stop, even when she had an amazing hand. He broke their silence.

"Penny for your thoughts commander?" She shook her head, clearing the thoughts from her mind. She really needed to work on her poker face. She looked up at James and struggled for an answer.

"I… I haven't been to Earth since n-school. It's weird to come back like this." She rubbed her forehead with the palm of her hand. She was a spacer; Earth had never been her home. But, it was the home for humanity. It didn't seem right to be returning in shackles.

"Think of this as shore leave." James was trying to be helpful but he knew that nothing he could say would make this any easier. He hoped his platitude would convey his support of Shepard if nothing else.

"I fucking hate shore leave." The words left her lips without thought. Her mind was still swirling with the gravity of her current situation. She didn't stop to think about her tone or the lighthearted atmosphere she had tried so hard to build with James.

"Oh?" He wasn't sure what else to say. Soldiers lived and breathed for shore leave. They got to feel normal for a few days before they had to be super human. It was the best part of the job. He wanted desperately to know what had happened to make Shepard hate being off duty so much.

"Elysium was shore leave." Shit.

You stupid pendejo.

Vega knew everything about Shepard. He knew that her squad was on shore leave during the Blitz but somehow he managed to stick his foot in his mouth anyway.

A quiet "oh" was all James could muster in response. He was too busy mentally berating himself to think of anything else to say.

Shepard realized what she had said after she had said it. Her shoulders tensed. She didn't talk about Elysium. She didn't want to think about Elysium. She sunk her head into her hands and tried hard to take deep breaths.

"Tough calls huh?" James chuckled nervously from his side of the table.

"Yeah, I guess they never really leave you." Her words hung in the air. Anderson came over the comm just in time to break the dark mood.

"We're through the Sol relay, ETA to Earth, 25 minutes. James, bring the Commander to the cargo bay…" There was a pause before Anderson apologetically added "and Shepard, you'll have to be cuffed again."

"Well, I guess it's time to face the music." Shepard held out her hands for James. He was exceptionally gentle as he cuffed her. She wondered how much more there was to this man as they both stood to leave.