A/N: I was going to make this a one-shot, but then I got nine pages in and realized that I probably had about twenty pages to go, and it's not as…cohesive as my last Teddy/Lily story, so I figured that I could probably break it into a multi-chaptered fic. Right now, it's looking to be about three, maybe four, chapters.
Also, I put Lily in Gryffindor in this one, which is weird for me, and I'm not sure if I like her there…but she's there.
(I am procrastinating on internship applications and fifteen page research papers and French translations like mad right now, you have no idea.)
I hope you enjoy, and please review!
Disclaimer: Je n'en ai rien.
ONE
once upon a time,
one princess got her fairytale ending,
and another was forgotten.
Bright May sunlight glinted off the glass covers of the displays surrounding Teddy. He turned his eyes from a gold ring set with three stones – a diamond in the center and two rubies at the sides – to one sporting an enormous rock and a price tag that made his heart seize.
Harry kept a tight rein on his facial expression as he pretended to examine the rings in the case beside the one Teddy agonized over. He had agreed, after some urging from Ginny and Hermione, to accompany Teddy on this ring search, but even in his worst nightmares he had not expected the endeavor to last more than an hour, or to require more than three stops at the very most. Merlin knew that it hadn't taken him nearly this long to find Ginny's ring. He had caught sight of the white gold circle with a diamond at the center and ruby and emerald chips set into its band in a shop window, entered the store, made the purchase, and walked out. He hadn't requested seven different jewelry merchants to remove fifteen different rings from their cases. He hadn't shaken his head at each and every one, finding something wrong in its composition or setting or bloody color. As if white diamonds even came in different colors.
Teddy sighed, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, Harry, I just want this to be perfect. I've made her wait so long…I don't want to screw it up now."
Instead of simply agreeing, which he could have done if Ginny and Hermione hadn't settled themselves quite firmly into his brain with their constant analysis of everything, Harry asked, "Teddy, are you certain that you want to do this?"
Teddy glanced up, surprise spreading across his features, although he managed to keep the color of his eyes and hair a simple, unassuming, brown, "Don't you think it's time?"
"That's not what I asked," Harry ran a hand through his messy hair, revealing the old lightning bolt scar for a fraction of a second, "Are you sure you want to get married?"
Teddy closed his eyes, "If I don't propose soon, Victoire will get tired of waiting for me. She is, as she has been fond of reminding me lately, twenty-five. Which is apparently ancient in girl years, or something."
Harry signed, "But if you don't want to get married yet, Ted, she should understand that."
The younger man shook his head, "What she doesn't understand is how we've been dating for eight years and haven't gotten married yet. She thinks that if I'm not ready to commit now, then I never will be, and if I never will be, then she doesn't want to waste her time on me." Teddy shrugged, "It's not like it's so unusual not to get married these days. Plenty of people are together for their entire lives without getting hitched." Teddy fell silent for a moment, "Although I'm fairly certain that Victoire's parents and grandparents wouldn't be very pleased with that prospect."
Harry grinned, "No, I don't believe they would. But Teddy, if you don't want to marry her, doesn't that mean that you don't want to be with her?"
"I never said I didn't want to marry her," Teddy pointed out. "I just said I wasn't sure about getting married now. But…" he hesitated, "Harry, I think that what I'm about to say will make you think I'm a bad person, so just remember that I'm not, all right?"
His godfather shook his head, "Theodore Lupin, I could never think of you as a bad person."
Teddy smiled gratefully, "Right, so, by proposing, I think I can buy some time. Not a lot, you see, but enough so that I'm ready when the wedding does happen. This way, I can promise a future to her and make her feel as if we're moving forward – which we are – just not necessarily as quickly as she'd like."
Harry bit back a smile, "I think you'd be surprised at how many men get engaged for that very reason. But just be sure, Ted, before you ask her, that you are positive that you do want to marry her sometime soon. Because if not, it would be better to break up with her now, rather than later."
"I'm sure," Teddy turned his attention back to the rings in front of him. "I like that one." He pointed to a twisted gold band sporting a medium-sized diamond and two sapphires on either side. Harry let out a sigh of relief as Teddy placed an order for the proper size and they left the jeweler's, both more than ready for drinks at the Leaky Cauldron.
Teddy later admitted that he chose a poor evening to propose to Victoire, but it had seemed right, at the time. The June night air smelled like honeysuckle and heather and the moon glowed so brightly that every street lamp and metal gate appeared glazed in silver. Teddy had a bottle of expensive champagne, two crystal wine glasses, a very beautiful engagement ring, and a well-practiced heart-quickening speech rolling around on the tip of his tongue.
Of course, when the moment came, the perfection of his speech didn't matter. Which was good, because he stumbled over the all-important question. He got through the "I love you"s and the "I want to spend every morning and night and every second in between with you"s no problem, but when it came to actually asking, "Victoire, will you be my wife?" his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth and he ended up forcing out, "Vic, d'you want to marry me?"
But he probably could have just mumbled the word "marry" and she would have reacted in the same way. She would have squealed and thrown her arms around him in absolute joy, knocking over her champagne and squishing the black velvet ring box against his body.
"Finally," she breathed as she kissed him.
So all that went well, if not perfectly. But Teddy had misjudged Victoire's excitement over getting some form of commitment out of him; her joy lasted well into the next day, which had long ago been reserved for a Potter-Weasley family gathering.
They Flooed into the Burrow to find a sign strung across the kitchen exclaiming: "Congratulations Hugo and Lily!" with two gold and red roaring lions racing around the edges. The whole thing was rather overwhelming, and Lily, who stood at the stove when Teddy and Victoire tumbled through the fireplace, laughed at the expressions on their faces when they caught sight of it.
"I know, it's awful. But Hugo's girlfriend made it and she'd be hurt if we didn't put it up," Lily explained as she greeted her cousin and Teddy with hugs. "Everyone's out back, if you guys want to join them."
"You go ahead, Vic, I'll be out in a minute," Teddy said, and Victoire kissed him lightly on the cheek before ruffling Lily's already messy red hair and slipping out the screen door.
"So how's it feel, kid?" Teddy asked, leaning against the counter and grabbing an apple from the bowl on the sideboard.
Lily had returned to the stove, and she directed her wand at the pot of potatoes as she replied, "Strange. I never really thought this day would come, you know? I expected to spend my whole life at Hogwarts, and I wasn't really too torn up about that idea. Leaving, though…it feels odd." She wiped the back of her hand beneath her eyes, catching some of the wetness that overflowed her lashes. She forced a smile to her lips, "I guess it'd be easier if I was certain about what comes next."
Teddy wrapped his arm around Lily's shoulders and squeezed her gently in a one-armed hug. She repressed the electric shiver that his touch sent through her veins and leaned her head against his shoulder, breathing in his familiar scent. "Everyone feels scared when they leave school, Lil. But you're talented and smart and strong, I'm sure you'll find your way soon."
She shrugged, "I've gotten job offers from Potion brewing and Charm invention organizations in London, Paris, and the States, but I'm not sure what I want to do yet."
"And you're worried? Merlin, Lil, most people leave Hogwarts without an idea of what they're going to do. You're lucky." He hesitated, "But you wouldn't leave the UK, would you?"
She sighed, "That's the question. The London job involves more the association of Potions and Charms with Dark Magic – I'd have to go through Auror training, and I'm not too keen on that type of study. I'm thinking I might go to Paris."
Teddy stiffened. He couldn't imagine Lily as far away as France, although it was considerably better than the States. "Just make sure the decision is the right one for you," Teddy murmured against her hair, dropping a kiss on the top of her messy scarlet head.
"No worries there, Ted." Lily pulled away from him and removed the potatoes from the stove. "Want to go let everyone know it's time to eat?"
He glanced at her, "Why're you cooking today, anyway? Isn't it supposed to be 'your special day' and all that?"
She laughed, "I'd rather cook than have everyone congratulating me all day. Like it's so difficult to graduate from Hogwarts."
"Some people would say it is," Teddy grinned as Lily rolled her eyes. "All right, all right, I'll go make the announcement. But really, Lil, you should try and spend some time with the family today. They did come out here to see you, after all."
"And Hugo," Lily pointed out. "Go on, Ted, stop trying to manage my life." She spoke with a grin, but Teddy could tell from the way she had lowered her right eyebrow that she was partially serious.
"Right, you're all grown up and responsible now." He broke the gravity of his statement with a laugh and banged out the screen door, calling to gather the family into the expanded dining room.
The day was supposed to be about Lily and Hugo, and although Lily usually disliked being the center of attention, she found herself enjoying the dinnertime conversation. Everyone who had been at Hogwarts with the two youngest cousins began rehashing their experiences, and while some memories made Lily's skin burn bright red under her freckles, they all spurred on minutes of laughter.
Hugo had just reappeared from beneath the table, where he had ducked when James began telling a particularly mortifying story about the first time Hugo had come off of reserve and played Seeker in a Quidditch match, when Victoire interrupted the continuous flow of joking nostalgia.
"I'm sorry, can I have the floor for a moment?" She stood, her pale right hand draped possessively over Teddy's shoulder, squeezing rosy pink nails into his tee-shirt for a fraction of a second.
James caught his breath and waved his hand, "Go on, Vic. I'm sure Lily will thank you, I had one of her rather disastrous experiences saved up to tell you all."
"Vicky," Teddy muttered, so low that he clearly hadn't intended anyone but Vic to hear.
"No, Ted, I can't wait any longer." Victoire turned her smile to the faces lining the long table, "Teddy asked me last night – we're getting married!" She held up her left hand, and Lily felt as if the light that glittered off the diamond cut straight through her chest.
She bit her lip, hard, and added her faint voice to the chorus of "Congratulations" echoing from her end of the table, watching as her uncles and her father stood to shake Teddy's hand, and her mother and aunts hurried to embrace the couple – all looking horribly unsurprised.
To be honest, no one looked particularly surprised. This was one of those things that had been a long time coming, and everyone had expected it ages ago. Lily herself had self-destructively placed a bet with James, Al, Rose and Scorpius on the exact date – and she realized with horror-tinged amusement that she had won that wager when all four of them rose and tossed coins to the table in front of her.
"I think you deserve more congratulations than them," Al told Lily softly as he handed her his five galleons, "You're getting more out of their engagement than they are."
"Al," Rose hissed, "Honestly, they're getting married. Nothing beats that!" Scorpius shot a terrified look at Rose, who just tossed her curly red hair over her shoulder and moved to hug Victoire.
"You don't think she's getting any ideas, do you?" Scorpius whispered as he added his rather large contribution to Lily's winnings.
"Honestly, Scor, girls always have ideas about marriage," Lily informed him, forcing a smile to her lips as she collected the money from the table in two freckled hands. "I need to go put this somewhere that the others won't find it."
Scorpius narrowed his gray eyes at her – for a Ravenclaw he had a surprising level of human intuition, "Are you all right, Lily?" His voice was soft enough that no one should have heard it, but Lily could feel Teddy's eyes jerk to her back at Scorpius's question.
"Yeah," Lily kept the smile on her face with effort – dammit, she was no good at hiding her emotions, "It's just…Hogwarts is over, you know?"
Scorpius nodded, his eyes not leaving her face, "Sure, but…are you certain that's all that's wrong?"
Rose appeared at her boyfriend's side, her hand tugging at his, "Come on, Scor, the boys want to play a game of Quidditch before it gets dark out. Coming, Lil?" she called over her shoulder, and she didn't seem surprised when her cousin shook her head.
"I'll be out in a few minutes." Lily carried the coins awkwardly upstairs to Uncle Percy's old room, which she and her brothers now shared whenever they visited their grandparents. She grabbed her bag from the bed where she had tossed it earlier and poured the jangling coins in.
"Lily?" Hugo and his girlfriend, Fee Thomas, appeared silently in the doorway, "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, of course," Lily whirled to face them, a smile already stretched across her face. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"You didn't gloat," Fee pointed out. "You always gloat when you win something."
"And you won a shitload," Hugo added.
"Well, we've all got to grow up sometime," Lily said, tugging her red hair back into a ponytail and securing it with a rubber band. "You guys ready to play some Quidditch?"
She didn't notice the worried look that Fee and Hugo exchanged as they followed her out of the room – if she had, she would have tried harder to convince them that she was okay.
Lily managed to block out the pain that irrational, unrequited love had caused and allowed the inspiring, infallible joy of flying to take her away, and she, Rose, Roxy and Lucy completely trashed the boys in the first game. But then Teddy had to go and join the next one, and she couldn't keep her eyes on the Quaffle with him hovering at the opposite end of the field, guarding that goal. His hair shifted between a vibrant blue and his usual brown and his tee kept blowing up in the wind, affording Lily an occasional glance at the faint six-pack that had featured prominently in her favorite, most heart-wrenching dreams for the last three years. She couldn't keep her focus on the Quaffle that kept barreling by her.
She landed after that game and shrugged off the defeat, "Two days out of school and I've apparently lost my Quidditch touch. Good thing I didn't want to follow in your footsteps, Jamie."
She could feel Rose and Scorpius's eyes tracking her as she brought her broom to the shed at the back of the garden and returned to watch the Quidditch match. It would have been too strange if she had locked herself in her room or Flooed home, the way she wanted to. Lily wanted, needed, her family to be in the dark about her feelings for Teddy, she couldn't even imagine how they would react if they knew how she woke in the middle of the night, shaking with longing from a dream in which she and Teddy lay curled around each other, blanketed in lust (and love).
So she sat next to her mother and father and cheered on her cousins and brothers until it got too dark to see the balls and they all landed, exhausted, finally ready to go home. Lily hurried upstairs to grab her bag, then went down to say goodbye to everyone, and almost got out of there without incident. She would have, if Scorpius and Rose hadn't grabbed her by the hands as she was about to apparate and dragged her out into the darkness.
" Lily." Rose began.
"Yes, Rose?" Lily glanced from Rose's pale outline to Scorpius's, "What's up?"
"We've asked you this already, but we just want to make sure you're really all right."
Lily took a deep breath and held it, forcing herself to meet their shadowed gazes, "I'm good. Why does everyone think something's wrong?"
"Because you're shit at lying," Scorpius answered.
"And you're never as quiet as you've been today," Rose supplied.
"And that was the worst I've ever seen you play at Quidditch. Even worse than that time that you got really drunk at a Gryffindor party and organized a midnight match." Scorpius added, and Lily was grateful that the darkness covered up her blush.
"Is it Teddy, Lil?" Rose asked.
"What do you mean?" Lily tugged at the hem of her red shirt.
Scorpius sighed, "We mean, are you in love with Teddy?"
His voice was soft, and the noise from inside the house ensured that no one would overhear their conversation, but Lily couldn't help but glance over Scorpius's shoulder toward the light spilling from the screen door. No one stood anywhere near it.
She looked from Rose to Scorpius and tried to lie, "That is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in ages. He's eleven years older than me, and obviously perfect for Vic and – "
"He's been your best friend since you were born," Rose interrupted. "That's all that matters, right?"
Lily closed her eyes, "Merlin, you don't know how hard I've tried…"
"It'll be all right." Scorpius promised; Rose had thrown her arms around her cousin, and he awkwardly reached over to smooth Lily's red hair away from her flushed face.
"How do you know?" She asked, pulling away from Rose and turning her back on the house, "What if I never move on?"
Rose sighed, "Eventually it won't hurt as much, I'm sure of it."
"And until then?" Lily turned to look at them. They had had to fight against family prejudices, but to Lily their love, their relationship, seemed easy. Pure. Simple.
"Until then…" Scorpius looked at her, "What do you want to do, Lily?"
"Aside from him," Rose added with a small sad smile.
"Get away." Lily looked up at the stars, catching sight of the three stars of Orion's belt, "Be happy. Do something."
"So accept one of the jobs that people seem to be throwing at you. Go off and do something for yourself, not for anyone else," Scorpius suggested, wrapping an arm around Rose's shoulders.
Rose bit back the protest that had risen in her throat – she didn't want Lily to leave, but Scorpius's suggestion made sense. "We'll miss you, but maybe it'd be best."
Lily broke her eyes away from the dazzling stars and smiled at the two of them, "You're probably right. But can you guys please not tell anyone about this? It's…not something I really want anyone to know."
"Of course," Scorpius nodded, squeezing Rose's shoulders sharply so that she added "No worries, Lily. It's a secret, we promise."
What was not a secret, at least among the Potters and Weasleys, was that Lily had accepted the Charm invention position in the States. Over the next week, everyone, including her Uncle Charlie, whom she hadn't seen for several months, Flooed into the Potter's cottage and tried to convince her to stay.
"Honestly, Lil, I don't get it," James complained, late on the night before her departure. He lay on the floor of her room, tossing a rolled up pair of bright blue tights into the air and catching them absentmindedly. Al perched on Lily's stripped mattress, watching as his sister flicked her wand around the room, directing piles of folded clothes into a trunk and high-heeled pumps and sling-backs into a box.
"What don't you get?" Lily asked, snatching a tattered school robe out of the air and chucking it into a pile in the corner.
"Why you're leaving," Albus answered. "Why not work in London? You'll be closer to the family that way."
"Or at the very least, why not Paris? Then you could visit Aunt Fleur's family whenever you're homesick and you'd see Uncle Bill and Vic and Dom and Louis pretty often."
"Because the departments in both London and Paris offered me jobs that I'm not particularly interested in." Lily tried not to think about how awkward it would be to see Victoire on a regular basis, without the rest of the family around to tamper her jealousy.
"Oh, come on." Albus groaned, "You're Lily bloody Potter, for Merlin's sake. If you want a particular job, you just walk up to your boss, tell her what you want to do, and she'll let you do it. She'd probably create a bloody position out of nothing for you."
"It's possible," Lily reached for a necklace that lay tangled with a clunky charm bracelet on her bedside table. "But I don't want to get by on just my name."
"What good is it being a Potter if you don't use it? Plus," James chucked the tights against the wall and seemed disappointed when the nylon ball didn't come bouncing back toward him, "those Americans probably won't even know who Harry Potter is."
"And if they do, it won't mean as much to them. He's probably like some boring character in a history text, not a celebrity." Albus watched as Lily disentangled the swallow necklace from the charm bracelet and clasped the necklace around her neck, leaving the bracelet in a pile on the table. He reached for it.
"Again," Lily grabbed for the bracelet, but Al held it out of reach, "I want to see what it's like to be kind of normal. To not have everyone give me everything just because of who I am. Give that back, Albus."
"Didn't Teddy give these to you?" Her brother ignored her, flipping through the charms – a broomstick, a quaffle, a green and red star, a jet of sparkling flame, a tiny screech owl that flapped its wings… – one for every year Lily had been alive, plus a few Christmases.
"Yeah," Lily turned away, stooping to grab the tights from the floor.
"Aren't you going to take it with you?" Al asked, flipping over the newest one, a silver moon that looked surprisingly pretty hanging from the gold chain among a group of multicolored charms. The moon was inscribed with the words toujours nous…always us.
"No."
James sat up and exchanged a panicked look with Albus. "Lily," James began as Albus tried to stop staring at the words on the charm. "You're not leaving because of Teddy and Victoire, are you?"
Lily hadn't expected her brothers to pick up on this, but she had been prepared for badgering from someone in her family. After all, her mum and Aunt Hermione were forever trying to nose into her love life. So while she hadn't thought she'd be answering the boys' questions, she was prepared to answer someone's. "If anything, I considered staying because of them." The lies felt strange on her tongue, and she remained facing her wardrobe, sorting through the piles of clothes that she was leaving at home. She didn't trust herself to lie to their faces. "I mean, Teddy's my best friend, and Vic's one of our closest cousins, and I want to be here to help them get ready for the wedding. But this job was just too good an offer to pass up."
James heaved a sigh of relief, but Albus said, "What does the inscription on the moon charm mean, Lil?"
"Which one?" Lily feigned ignorance, her hands shaking. That charm had inspired a miniscule amount of hope. Teddy had given it to her that Christmas, and had told her that the silver color would change in accordance with her mood when she wore the bracelet – kind of the way his hair and eyes changed colors with his. He told her that it would always be the two of them, that they'd always have each other's backs. Like two best friends, not the way lovers do.
"The one that says toujours nous." James stiffened as Al's voice shifted into the lilting French tones. What the hell had Teddy been thinking?
"You speak French, Al. It means always us."
"I understand the literal meaning. What'd Teddy mean when he gave it to you?"
"That we're best friends, and that we'll never leave each other. Merlin, what'd you think he meant?" Lily whirled, her eyes flashing angrily.
"That he's in love with you." James supplied, "Which would be weird, seeing as how he's just proposed to Victoire."
"And he's eleven years older than me," Lily added. "How could we ever think about each other that way?"
Albus shrugged, "Love does crazy things to the mind. Or, anyway, that's what Mum always says."
Lily laughed self-deprecatingly, leaning down to shut her trunk, "Not that crazy."
"But you're leaving," James said. "What does that mean for Teddy?"
"I'm leaving physically. I'm still his friend." Lily turned to face her brothers, "Just like I'm still your sister. And believe me, it is good to know that you will miss me, but I am going, no matter what you say. So come hug me and then go, because I need to get some rest before tomorrow."
Al and James stood and grabbed their little sister in brief hugs, ruffling her red hair and pressing rough kisses to her temple. "You'll be good, Lil."
"Damn straight I will." She shooed them from her room and fell onto her bare mattress, reaching for the charm bracelet that Al had dropped on the striped fabric. She slipped it onto her wrist before remembering why she had stopped wearing it ages ago. The moon burned a deep, fiery red, and the words on the back shifted, although Teddy hadn't told her that the charm extended to them: toujours amour. Always love.
She ripped the bracelet from her wrist and chucked it toward her wardrobe, where it slid beneath the cabinet in a clatter of metal on wood. She shut her eyes, trying to think about New York City, towering skyscrapers and new opportunities. But Teddy's smile and his color changing hair and his unwavering voice kept intruding on the images of busy streets and clinical Charm labs and wild, age-appropriate, American boys.
A/N: If I decide to actually do work, this won't be updated for a while, but that's unlikely, so it'll probably be updated later this week at the latest.
Thanks for reading, and hope you liked! (review?)
hugs&kisses