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July 10th
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I "borrowed" this idea from a book. So, technically, the idea is not original. And technically, the idea is PROBABLY copyrighted. But I doubt Nora Roberts will mind if I use an idea of hers and use my own characters to make a story - somewhat similar, not exact - and make no profit from it. It's for my pleasure, and my readers only. Sorry Nora!
There will be some time skipping. Because it starts out when Carol's just finds out she is pregnant, but progresses throughout the story.
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"Ma, I'm pregnant." Carol said. She was sitting in her mother's house. Helen Hathaway was sitting across from her on the couch. Helen's mouth dropped open at Carol's unexpected news.
"You're what?" She asked. Carol sighed softly.
"Ma, I believe you heard me. And I know very well you know that it means." Carol said, her voice tinted with exasperation.
"I heard you and I do know what it means to be with child. Dear God, Carol. Doug's the father?" Carol raised her eyebrows, slightly insulted.
"Yes, Ma. Doug is the baby's father."
"Have you told him?" Helen asked. Carol shook her head.
"No. He has no right anymore, Ma. He left me easily enough and with him he took his rights as a father. This child is mine." Carol explained clearly and painfully. Her hands were clutched together in her lap. Helen nodded, satisfied.
"You shouldn't have to raise a child on your own, Carol. But I'd rather you raise it alone than with Douglas." Carol nodded, making her mother believe she agreed. Inside, Carol's heart was breaking into pieces.
"I'm sorry I never listened to you before, Ma. I should have." Carol said. Helen nodded, satisfied.
"Well, without him, you wouldn't be an expectant mother, either. So, you could say it's good." Helen said with a smile. She made her way to Carol and bent over her, hugging her gently. Helen looked back up and her eyes were filled with rare tears.
"My baby's having a baby." Helen said.
"Oh Ma!" Carol exclaimed and pushed herself up to wrap her arms around Helen's waist. "I'm so scared."
"I know, baby. I know." Helen said and held her daughter close to her.
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Carol lay awake, alone, in the darkness. She'd gone to bed nearly two hours ago and she couldn't sleep. Her mind kept drifting to Doug. And to the babies she had found out she was carrying. Two, not one. Carol rolled onto her side.
How was she going to cope? One was hard enough as a single mother. But two at the same time....Carol didn't want to dwell on it. She'd do it. Because she had to and because she couldn't let Doug win. She loved him and always would but he was gone. And she'd move on, with their children. The only thing wrong was Doug wouldn't be there.
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Carol sat in her kitchen, quietly eating breakfast. She was due at work in an hour. She was tired, the babies had kept her up all night, kicking their way around her stomach. At six months pregnant, the babies were big enough and had enough room to have their own personal soccer games with Carol's bladder. Gently Carol pressed a hand to her stomach.
"C'mon children, let Mommy rest, would you?" She asked and smiled when she felt a strong kick right against her head. "Nice aim, baby." She shook her head and continued eating her eggs.
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"Mark, I'm fine. I don't need to rest." Carol said. Mark smiled and took her arm.
"You will sit. You're eight months pregnant, with twins I might add, and you need to stay off your feet." He insisted, pushing her gently into a seat at the admit desk.
"Dammit, Mark. I know I'm having twins. And I know I'm eight months pregnant. And I know when I need to get off my feet." Carol said. Mark chuckled.
"Do as I say, or I'll send you home. I'm the boss, remember?" Mark asked, smiling, but being serious.
"Yes, boss." Carol resigned and muttered to herself as he walked off to tend to a patient. "I know my limit." She mumbled and reached for a pen to work on the charts Mark had handed off to her. "He just wanted me to finish his damn charts." Carol finished griping but sulked silently.
"Carol." She heard a quiet voice coming from above her. Her entire being froze. Slowly, slowly she lifted her head and looked into Doug's chocolate eyes. They stared for a few moments before Carol shuffled her feet forward and slid a bit further under the desk. She knew Doug hadn't seen her expanded belly, he was back too far and she was hidden by the desk.
"Hello Doug." She said after clearing her throat and holding her head up strongly.
"I.." He trailed off.
"Is there something you need? I could page Mark." Carol said. Her hands rested on her stomach as she tried to 'protect' the babies from Doug.
"No, I...I came to see you." Carol lifted one eyebrow carefully.
"Oh? Well, I'm working as you can see.." Carol trailed off. For the first time Doug noticed the dark blue scrub top she was wearing. He looked down the hall a bit and saw two nurses with the mandatory pink scrubs on. He turned back to her but pushed the thought away. It wasn't important.
"We need to talk." Doug said.
"Do you really think this is the appropriate place for this?" Carol said, her voice cool. Doug looked away from her and saw Lydia and Randi watching him and listening to their conversation. Elizabeth rounded the corner.
"Carol, I need you to..." She trailed off when she spotted Doug. "Oh..Excuse me." Elizabeth murmured and backed away. She knew Carol hadn't told Doug about the babies. And she could tell by the look on Doug's face that he'd yet to find out. Doug swallowed and shook his head.
"I..No, I guess not. Could I come over later, maybe?" Carol sighed. There was no way she would put this off. She had no excuses. None.
"I get off at seven, come over then or a little later." Carol said. She got off at six but figured she'd need some time to herself. He nodded and scratched his face slightly.
"Umm, alright. I guess I'll see you then." Doug said. Carol nodded and watched as Doug backed away from her. He made his way out of the hospital and Carol lay her forehead against the desk and groaned.
"What the hell am I going to do?" Carol asked as she felt Lydia and Randi step up beside her. Lydia touched her back gently, reassuring.
"Tell him to go back to where he came from." Randi suggested. Carol laughed weakly.
"I'll just sic you on him." Carol said. Randi laughed but it wasn't genuine, for she realized the emotional pain Carol was going through. Carol groaned again and leaned back in the chair. "How'm I supposed to explain this to him." She placed her hands on her stomach again.
"Tell him they're not his." Lydia suggested. Carol nodded.
"Yeah, that'll work. He won't believe me." Carol said.
"Why not?"
"He would know. Doug would know."
*****
Later that night, Carol sat on the couch, a blanket over her and a pillow over her abdomen. She hoped she could hide it for just a bit longer.
When she heard the knock on the door, her throat constricted. Her heart rate increased and she took several deep breaths.
"Come in!" She yelled loudly, praying he would hear her. She'd left the door unlocked so she wouldn't have to get up to answer the door. Seconds later she heard the rattle of the door as he opened it. Thank God, she thought.
"Carol?" Doug asked as he stepped into the house. He'd thought he'd heard her yell and hoped he was right.
"Hey." She replied, swallowing her nervousness.
"I thought I heard you yell." He said, somewhat puzzled as to why she didn't answer the door herself.
"Uh, yeah. I was being lazy." She said and realized that it just may not have been Doug at the door. Well, Thank God for that too, she thought. "Come on in. Just hang up your coat. You know where it goes." Carol said. Doug nodded and surveyed the room as he hung his coat on the rack. She hadn't changed anything, he thought, as he looked around.
"What would you have done if it wasn't me that came into the house?" Doug asked.
"Kicked some ass." Carol replied. He chuckled nervously and sat beside her on the couch. She sent up another silent pray because he obviously hadn't noticed her big abdomen. Carol dug deep, but she just couldn't find the anger. The bitterness had faded away a long time ago. She had just given in to the fact that she would be a single mother of two. But now he was back and she was at a loss. They sat in silent for a few moments.
"Why are you here?" Carol finally asked. Doug sighed and leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.
"You." Doug murmured and straightened. "I've spent 8 or so months in Seattle. Alone." Doug paused and shook his head. "I hated every God damn second of it. I hated every second I wasn't with you. Carol, I need you. I hate myself for leaving. I shouldn't have left. I realize now that it was the wrong thing to do. I realized that a long time ago.
"I just got up the courage to come back. I couldn't call because I knew you would tell me not to come." Doug closed his eyes and leaned forward again, scared by her silence. Carol studied him with critical eyes. He looked thinner, definitely. His hair was a bit more gray around the edges, she thought. And he looked exhausted. Not tired from jet lag, but a tiredness that came from months of restless nights....Sleepless nights. She knew exactly how that felt. And though her heart ached with the look of him, she wouldn't let herself feel responsible. Or guilty.
She had her own heart to worry over.
"You shouldn't have." Carol said. Doug looked at her. Why was it that she looked, magnificent? He'd lost weight, she'd gained some, he could tell. But not too much. Where his hair was turning gray, hers looked shinier, prettier. It was a bit longer. Her face had a certain glow that it didn't have before.
"Maybe not. But if you don't let me stay, I'm nothing. Carol, I'm nothing without you." On impulse Doug scooted to her and took her hands in his, knocking the pillow aside a bit. He didn't even notice, his eyes were focused on her face. But she noticed and her heart skipped several beats and her stomach dropped. She wanted to move it back into position but her hands were locked in his.
"Doug..." She cleared her throat.
"Carol, please." He kept his hands in hers but didn't hold them up anymore. He let them drop. When they didn't drop into her lap as expected but fell against something higher, something harder, he stopped and looked down. Froze. He kept his hands rested there and simply stared. Carol watched his face turn from shock to confusion. "I..Carol?" He looked up at met her gaze. She swallowed and pushed her way up from the couch, a bit unsteady as her stomach unbalanced her.
"I think you should go." Carol said and walked toward the kitchen. Doug stood.
"You didn't tell me that I'm having a child?" He asked. Carol whirled.
"This baby is not yours! He's mine. You left your rights behind when you left me. You have no right. He's mine!" Carol exclaimed, her eyes filled with tears and her voice raised. She kept one hand on her stomach, shielding it from Doug.
"I'm going to be a father?" He asked. She shook her head.
"Yes, again. But you'll not be a daddy. You won't know this baby anymore than you know your other." Carol said and watched the hurt flash in his eyes.
"I have the right, Carol..."
"No. That's exactly what you don't have. You left me without a thought." She wiped frantically at her tears. "I've been through all of this without you. I'm going to be a single mother."
"I love you, Carol." Doug tried frantically, grasping onto anything he could find.
"No! You wouldn't have left had you really loved me!" Carol exclaimed.
"Dammit, Carol, you could have came with me. I love you just as you love me."
"I don't love you." She said. His face paled and he stopped.
"You don't mean that." He whispered. She didn't answer. He swallowed and straightened. "Alright. I..You should know that I've moved back to Chicago. I got a job in a pediatric private practice. I'll be staying here." He stopped and backed up a foot. He clenched his hand into a fist and squeezed tightly, trying to ward off the emotional pain. "I love you and because of that, I'll respect your wishes for me to leave. But I do have a request. I'd like to pay child support. I want to help you." Carol began to shake her head. "Dammit, Carol, I didn't get to do anything with my son. All I know is he was a boy. I don't even know his name. I've never seen him. I didn't get to do a thing for him. Let me do this, please Carol. God, please let me do this. I need to do it." Finally Carol nodded.
"Alright." She whispered, her voice husky and her throat sore from screaming and crying.
"And...I..I'll send Mark my address and phone number. He can call or write me or anything after the baby is born. Please, Carol. I just...I need to know it's name and...I need more this time. Please." He pleaded, staring her straight in the eyes.
"I won't do anything else. I won't call or...or contact you or anything. I won't even see this child." His breath hitched. "I'll stay out of the way, completely. I just need to know." She saw the tears in his eyes and she closed hers slightly, so she couldn't see the pain in those big brown eyes. Then she nodded.
"I'll tell Mark." She said softly and opened her eyes. She saw a single tear spill over and he made no attempt to wipe it away.
"Thank you." He whispered and turned quickly, reaching for his coat.
"Doug.." Her own breath hitched in her chest. She let out a shaky sob as tears blurred her vision. She saw him turn. "Don't go." Then she was across the room and in his arms. "Please, don't leave me again." She sobbed and buried her face into his neck. He pulled her away a bit and spilled kisses all over her face.
"Oh, Carol."
"Kiss me, Doug. Really kiss me." Carol said. He pressed his lips to hers, but not in the kiss she needed. "Doug, you won't hurt the babies."
"The.." He trailed off, staring at her. "Twins?" He choked out. She nodded happily.
"Two."
"Oh..God, Carol." He fell to his knees and pressed several kisses to her swollen stomach. He rose back up and pressed his lips to hers, giving her that kiss they both needed. He crushed her against him, feeling the subtle movements of his children against his stomach.
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Doug stood in Carol's hospital room, looking down at the twin girls in his arms. Katherine Elizabeth and Tess Ann. He smiled and pressed kisses to their foreheads, marveling in the thick black hair on their heads.
Carol lay on her bed, watching him out of half closed eyes. He thought she was asleep so she kept quiet so she could watch and listen to him with his daughters.
"I love my girls. Oh God, I love you." He smiled. "You'll look just like your mommy. Yes, exactly." The grin never left him. "I'll be here forever." He murmured and stared at them for a few more moments. When he lifted his head to glance at Carol his eyes met hers and held.
They both smiled.
"I love you, Carol."
"I love you, too, Doug." He moved to her and handed her the sleeping Tess. He held Kate in his arms and scooted up onto the bed with her. They sat, as a family, finally and forever.
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