Author's Note: For this story, I picked the last line of a poem I love based on the book The DeVouring. The quote is: "Your body is here, but not your soul." Sounds pretty morbid and otherworldly, yeah, but I took it somewhere different entirely.

I hope you like this, guys.

Here's my first PLL fanfic!

La Tortura, 1800+ words of pure Aria & Ezra goodness! :D


Two hours. Two hours until graduation, and Aria had never felt so empty, so sad, so alone.

"Time to get ready!" Ella Montgomery peeked her head into her daughter's room, a smile on her face. "Big day."

Aria managed a pained smile. "I'm on it."

She went back to gazing in the mirror. Emotionless eyes, expressionless face. Hair unwashed, complexion pale. Her eyes had dark circles underneath. It looked as if she hadn't slept in weeks.

When had she last slept?

"Why did you leave me?" Aria murmured.

She stood up, stripped, and shrugged on her robe, trying not to look at her reflection again. What used to satisfy her now was her greatest disappointment.

Hideous.

She walked to the bathroom and turned the faucet, waiting for a warm stream of water to come out of the showerhead.

She had a lot of work ahead if she was going to make herself presentable.


It had been three months since he had ended it with her, sixteen weeks since he'd slept through the night, 112 days since he'd been truly happy.

It was torture. That was the only way he was able to describe these awful feelings. Being tortured. There was no light left: the darkness had devoured him alive.

"I already told you: I can keep my feelings in check," Aria said, fisting her hands in his shirt.

"I can't," Ezra said, rubbing a hand over his face. "When I'm around you, I can't control myself. I see you in class, and I want to touch you. Just lean in and kiss your forehead. Rest a hand on your leg. Brush your hair out of your face. I've come so close to giving us away."

"We can try harder."

Aria's voice sounded strained. Ezra couldn't look at her, for he knew what he'd see. Tears in her beautiful hazel eyes, her full lower lip trembling. He couldn't handle watching her come apart when he himself was breaking.

He shook his head. "We have to wait. Wait until graduation. We can move away together."

He chanced a look up and saw Aria smile sadly through her tears. "We can run away together, you mean."

He sighed. "It's the only way this can work. If you want this to work."

"I want this," Aria said firmly.

Being away from her was hard. He almost wished he'd just chanced it. Let her continue coming to his after school tutoring sessions, and help him work with the younger students at Rosewood High. She was good at what she did, and it made her happy. It made him happy to see her every day outside of class, though it was still in the school. At least he wasn't teaching her then.

He wanted to touch her. Make sure he was still real.

How could something that felt so right, so perfect, be so extremely, disgustingly wrong to so many people?

That's why Ezra ended it. Temporarily, but it felt like a lifetime. He longed to acknowledge her, to whisper "I love you," but he couldn't.

Not until she graduated.


Her parents knew she was moving out after graduation. They knew she had a flat in New York, a job lined up, a scholarship to NYU, and a roommate.

They didn't know she had Ezra.

"Congratulations!" Byron, her father, said, enveloping her in a hug. "It finally happened!"

"I thought it never would," Aria managed to joke.

"Well done, kiddo," her dad said before moving to talk to one of his friends.

Spotting her friends at a picnic table a few yards away, Aria approached Spencer, Emily, and Hanna.

"I can't believe it's finally over," Hanna said, gray eyes wide. "I thought we'd be trapped in high school forever."

"Now we just have to worry about college," Emily said dejectedly.

Spencer groaned. "I have so many summer assignments to get through before I go to field hockey camp."

Hanna snorted. "If you're going to complain about going Ivy, switch to a state school like me, or just get yourself a sports scholarship like Em."

"Wait, aren't you a little old for camp?" Aria interrupted before Spencer could snap back a response. Her stress and activity levels were already dangerously high; there was no need to add fuel to the fire.

"I'm coaching," Spence explained. "I'm in charge of the 9-12 year old girls, but I'm gonna try to get 13-16 instead. They're not as…little and annoying."

"You know what's really annoying?" Hanna asked. "Aria when she and Ezra are on a break."

Aria shrunk down in her seat.

"Graduation happened," Emily said. "Aren't you guys moving in together now?"

"Won't it be weird to move in with him when you haven't talked in 3 months?" Spencer asked.

Aria put her head in her hands.

"I don't know," she moaned.

"Guys, cool it," Spencer interjected. "The last thing this girl needs is more stress. I would know."

They laughed, and Aria decided at that moment that these next few days would be spent having fun with her best friends.


Ezra spent the next few days finalizing his plans and attending the various graduation parties he was invited to by his students. He saw Aria at every single one, but he tried to be friendly – nothing more, nothing less.

He already sent in his final rent payment, and his apartment was empty. Everything but a duffel bag containing the essentials was gone, and he felt even lonelier than before.

He had one more party to go to before he could live his life once again.

"Mr. Fitz!"

He turned around and saw Ella Montgomery approaching him with her son. And husband.

And daughter.

"I haven't seen you in so long!" Ella said. "I've been asking Aria about you, but you know how she is."

Annoyed, Ezra thought. Mortified, if her expression is anything to go by.

"I've been well," Ezra responded. A lie. He'd been awful, sick, tired, entirely unwell. "And you? How's teaching?"

"Great!" Ella said. "Nothing's better than a job that gives you the summer off. Are you teaching any classes over the summer?"

"No," he said, eyes flicking to Aria nervously. "Actually, I'm interviewing."

"Interviewing?" Ella asked, eyes shooting up in surprise. "Where?'

"Uh," he said, trying to choose his words carefully. "Philadelphia, New York, IUP…" NYU.

"Aria's going to school in Manhattan," Ella said proudly.

Ezra nodded. "Congratulations, Aria. I remember you telling me you were interested in moving to New York."

"I'm excited," Aria said, eyes locking with his. "There are a lot of great opportunities in New York."

"City that never sleeps," Ezra responded with a grin.

And then he knew that everything would be okay.


She only had a few boxes. She didn't need much: clothes, her favorite books, a few pictures, and her journal.

All she had to do was wait.

Finally, Ezra pulled into her driveway. He was right on time, but it felt like she had waited an eternity, would wait forever. But he came for her, just like he said he would, at a time and place they had agreed upon three months prior.

"Are Ella and Byron around?" Ezra asked after he got out of the car.

"They left," she said as he picked up the biggest box. "I already said goodbye."

Ezra nodded, then picked up the next box, putting it in his truck with the first one. "Are you sure you still want to do this?"

Aria took a deep breath. "I'm sure." If she didn't leave now, she would in three months. And if it wasn't with Ezra, she wasn't sure that she'd survive the next four years of school.

Her heart thrummed erratically for the entire drive up to New York. When they finally got to the city, it still took 45 minutes to get to Greenwich in the horrible traffic.

"I missed you," she finally said, glancing into his blue eyes.

His hand found hers, and their fingers locked together.

The apartment was beautiful. She wasn't sure if she thought that because of all the dark hardwood, warm tones, and lamplight, the fact that it had so much of Ezra in it, or if it was because finally, finally she had her own home, and she shared it with someone she cared for so deeply.

Suddenly, Aria spun around and launched herself into Ezra's arms.

"I love it!" she squealed and kissed every inch of his face.

"I'm glad," Ezra responded with a laugh and a grin so wide, it made his cheeks hurt.

Slowing down her kisses and looking into his eyes, she stated with conviction, "I love you."

He kissed her nose. "I know."

She giggled, and then looked serious once more.

"This is too perfect."

Ezra's eyebrows knit together and he put her down gently, immediately missing her legs wrapped around his waist, her arms around his neck. "What do you mean?"

"It's too good to be true," she said, kicking off her shoes and shrugging off her jacket. She plopped down on the sofa and groaned, running a hand on the leather. "God, I love this couch. I'm glad we got to keep it. Is this my couch now?" She added the last part as a joke.

Ezra picked up her feet, sat, and put them down again on his lap.

She suddenly sat up straight and pulled her legs into a pretzel position.

"Do we have enough money for this flat?" Aria asked.

"Yes," Ezra said, now understanding what she meant about things being too perfect.

"Did you get the job at NYU?"

"Yes." He nodded slowly. "It's Literary Analysis, so you don't have to switch out of Creative Writing."

"Is Hardy still mad at us?" she asked, arching a sculpted black eyebrow.

"No."

"Hmmm." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "How's about this: will your new professor friends care that I'm a student?"

Ezra rolled his eyes. "Professors are boring. Who cares what they think?"

"You are pretty boring," Aria agreed. "All you ever want to do is sit in coffee shops and read and write and buy me tea." All of her favorite things, of course.

"I never said I was an exciting guy," Ezra returned.

"Will you get bored with me?" Aria wondered aloud.

"Never."

"Will we fight?"

"Probably."

"Do you love me?"

"Absolutely."

Aria nodded, satisfied, then stood up to go to the kitchen.

"Where's the food?" Aria called.

"I didn't have time to shop for groceries," Ezra responded.

"Why's there a litter box?" She wondered from the archway connecting the kitchen and living room.

"I bought you a cat."

"No way."

"We have to walk two blocks to do laundry."

"Aha!" Aria shouted, pointing a finger accusatorially. "I see what you did there. Sneaking that in, thinking you'd distract me with the kitten." She sniffed aristocratically. "It isn't perfect."

"I never said it was," Ezra said, standing up to kiss his excited girlfriend.

It was worth it. Worth the torture.

Anything was worth it as long as he got to be with Aria.

"So where's my cat?"