A/N- I own nothing associated with TVD or TO.
These are drabbles detailed Elijah and Caroline's friendship that I put up on my tumblr pages and are now here.
Caroline bit her lip to keep from screaming as she climaxed. She faltered in her movements and Klaus grabbed her hips, keeping her steady as she rode him through her orgasm until he exploded deep within her. She fell onto his chest panting and he laughed breathlessly,
"Good morning sweetheart" he murmurs, always pleased to wake up to find Caroline half-naked and ordering him to 'Fuck her hard'
She kissed his jaw and wiggled against him, "Good morning best lay ever"
Klaus frowned at that, Caroline usually only relented and uttered such phrases when she was dripping wet, desperate for his touch and begging which meant…
"I've just been used" he noted with a frown and she nodded, completely unrepentant,
"Yep, so in return for morning sex you're going to help me with this little problem…"
Living with one's entire family could occasionally be quite burdensome.
Especially when those family members all had supernatural hearing.
It meant that one had to be somewhat restrained during sex.
Or make improper use of silk ties.
Which led to an entirely different line of debauchery.
Elijah grinned as Katherine pulled against the ties that had her spread eagled on her stomach in their bed, holding onto the material as another orgasm rocked her body. He reached under her hip and played with her clit as he continued thrusting into her, ensuring a build-up of another orgasm before the last one had truly abated. She's moaning around the gag and her brunette curls are bouncing across her shoulders when her next orgasm has her walls clenching and driving him to his own delayed release.
He strokes her back tenderly and checks to ensure the gag isn't hurting her in anyway before kissing her neck,
"And how would you rate that performance?" he asks, trying to calculate the number of orgasms they'd had during the night's repeated activities. The silk beneath them was soaking wet and the smell of sex permeated the entire room.
Katherine can't speak but she can gesture with her hands and that gesture has him cursing at her stubbornness and storming into the shower, leaving her tied up amongst the ruined sheets.
Caroline heard the sound of butter- not margarine but French butter made in the same way it had been two hundred years ago with a special churner imported from Versailles- being scraped across toasted bread- German bread, made by a lovely old lady with the cutest little bakery- and swept into the kitchen with a bright smile on her face,
"Morning Elijah!"
Nothing.
"Lovely day today huh?"
Still nothing.
She scowled and turned to Klaus who had slunk in and was already at the table, slouched down in a chair and rapidly unfolding the newspaper in the hopes of avoiding this entire scenario.
Not after that morning sex he wasn't.
"Klaus!" Caroline stomped her bare foot and glared at him pointedly, "Tell Elijah to talk to me!"
He sighs, "Elijah, talk to Caroline"
Elijah raises his head from his breakfast preparations, "Who?"
She groans, "Seriously?! Okay, I'm sorry already, I've apologised like a billion times!"
He tosses the knife he was using in the sink and places both hands on the counter before glaring at Caroline, "It has not been 'a billion times' and if it had been it still would not make up for the damage you have caused"
Caroline's response is momentarily paused while the vampires listen to the sounds of Katherine working her way free of her restraints and
'Who has the brains to break her chains and seize the reins?…'
"Okay" she quickly regroups, "This isn't entirely my fault because the only things Katherine and I have in common is shopping and sex and I could handle another day shoe shopping with her. It is both exhausting and terrifying"
"You could have found something else" he points out and she throws her hands up,
"I did! We went to strip clubs together for like…three days straight but there's only so many penises I can look at before I start seeing all men as commodities who exist purely for my sexual gratification!"
Elijah snorts, "Niklaus?"
Klaus looked up from the paper, "Just to be clear, I have no problem whatsoever being reduced to a commodity that exists purely for Caroline's sexual pleasure"
"See" he gestures to his little brother, "You had an activity that worked for everyone involved, you spent time with Katherine, you both kept out of danger, you contributed to the New Orleans economy, you found fresh food and you both came home usually quite amorous, you could have maintained your friendship through that but you had to try and find a 'healthier outlet'"
"I'm sorry!" she repeated, "How was I supposed to know she'd take a musical comedy to heart and declare a fictional evil queen her 'spirit animal'?"
"By the simple fact that she was an evil, brunette queen who wore high heels and invaded entire countries for a single jewel?" Elijah pointed out,
"When have you ever not known Katherine to be attracted to powerful, fashionable women?"
The sound of Katherine singing reached their ears, as she started running the shower
'…More than just okay, I'd absolutely say more like middling to fair'
"And do you know how irritating it is to have centuries of sexual talent reduced to the score of middling to fair?!"
"Seriously?!" Caroline rolled her eyes, "Obviously she just likes the phrase, nobody buys that many costumes and that truly horrific number of thongs if she doesn't enjoy sex and there is no way she could fake that many orgasms. She won't even drink a cocktail if the alcohol to sugar ratio isn't perfect, she wouldn't go down on you if she didn't get off on the…reciprocity"
"Please stop thinking and talking about my brother's sex life" Klaus interrupted, "And I hate to side with my brother…temporarily" he adds hastily when he sees that Caroline is giving him the ensuing abstinence glare, "But my minions are starting to get annoyed by the constant referral to them as 'inbreeds and halfwits'"
"Well if they were smarter they wouldn't have become your minions and they're all pureblood werewolves so statistically speaking they would have had to have inbred at some point" Caroline argues,
"And" she continues, "I thought the show would get her off Game of Thrones"
"Ah yes," Elijah sighs, "Let us not forget the Game of Thrones month long incident. The reason our sister Rebekah is currently sequestered in the Himalayas in a yurt three miles outside a tiny village with no internet connection and no clue who George R. R Martin is. My nephew Erik still answers to the name Joffrey and Niklaus is currently growing out his hair and wasting brain cells learning a fictional language just so he can command his horses again!"
"The silver bells are nice though" Klaus comments only to find Elijah pointing an angry finger at him,
"You put one silver bell in your hair and I will burn New Orleans to the ground!"
Caroline winced, "Well…surely this is better than that?"
"Is it?" he challenged, "Because at this point I have a legitimate fear that Katherine will wear a push up bra and start a détente"
"Push up bra!" Caroline jumped on the detail eagerly, "Katherine's wearing more push up bras now, that's a good thing"
"Why?" he asked and she floundered, "Her breasts look bigger and perkier?"
"That only attracts more attention from others, I know perfectly well the shape and size of her breasts I have such an intimate acquaintance with them that I could draw an anatomically correct picture down to the last visible vein with my eyes blindfolded"
Caroline quickly realised that she was not winning this argument, especially when Katherine broke out into a rendition of 'Not the worst thing ever',
"Maybe I could substitute this current addiction for something less…" she tries to find the right words, "Threatening and annoying?"
Elijah only glares, "You will run it past me first or so help me god I will track down every last one of Niklaus' ex-girlfriends and invite them to New Orleans before compelling them to recount on camera every single sexual act performed between them and my brother, I will then lock you in a small room and play the video on loop for a week straight!"
He storms from the room, having completely forgotten his breakfast and Caroline turns to Klaus with an eyebrow raised,
"You know" he states, folding the paper back up, "I think he's really beginning to like you"
"How many ex-girlfriends do you have that are currently living?" she asks in a deadly tone,
"Oh don't worry sweetheart" he shrugs, "It won't come to that I'm sure we'll find something to distract Katherine before then"
The tv show in question is called Galavant and the songs are
1. I love you
2. No-one but you
3. Maybe you're not the worst thing ever.