Hello Everyone! Thank you for being so paitent! Deb and I are new to and thus, this is our very first Fanfic. :throws confetti: around In case you're wondering, Deb is kinda anti social and doesn't talk much.
Deb: Yeah..so?
:grins: Well, anyway. Since she's unable to access the net very often currently, I'll be uploading our new chapters, and updating the story most of the time! yay We hope you enjoy. This fic is rated PG 13 for some mild language (Unless Cid comes in :sweatdrop: ) and some fluff scenes. Hurray.
Disclaimer: No, we do not own the chars of Final Fantasy VII! The people at Squaresoft/Enix do. Go them. Now, if you see any chars that do not take place in FFVII or Advent Children, those indeed are our original characters.
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Into Eternity Chapter One: Memories
He stood in silence in the eroding doorway of the collasping church. One leather clad hand resting against it, soft mako infected eyes flickered in the dim light. They shifted from one end of the room to the other, surveying it, drinking it in. It hadn't changed all that much since he had last been here, the familiar stained glass windows refracted the bleak gray light from outside, casting colorful shadows on the old wooden floorboards. Cracks ran up the wall, bricks fallen out of place over the years. Intricate engravings snaked around the pillars, intertwining and fading in some places.
light streamed from an open hole in the roof above, focusing on a small patch of pale yellow lillies, nearly at their deaths, other newly grown ones had spread throughout the church, ones he had tended to himself in reverence of her memory. His gaze rested on them as the memories flicked through his mind.
"You don't see many flowers around here..."
"Oh these? Do you like them? They're only one gil."
"...My name is Aeris, the flower girl."
"Cloud!"
He swallowed hard trying to clear his head of those thoughts, yet they always plagued him, returning with renewed vigour each time he tried to drown them out. He began to walk hesitantly forward, letting his fingers run over the smooth dust ridden mahogany of an old pew, as if it were soothing to him. He looked quietly to the flowers, staring blankly at the scene that unfolded in front of his eyes.
She was there, kneeling in the midst of them, and for a moment they seemed alive again, bathed in the light, returning to their golden color as if welcoming her. Her head was bowed, a slight flush in her pale cheeks, her hands clasped as she uttered whispers of fervant prayer to some unknown god, perhaps to the planet itself.
He watched in awe...but it was too familiar...
She then slowly raised her head to look over at him, verdant green eyes glimmering as if they glowed with the smile that tinged on her lips. Suddenly they widened and her expression seemed to change to that of shock. They dulled as her body stiffened and then relaxed, the smile returning as she fell. The flowers were soon stained crimson with the substance that invaded the gold.
He ran towards her, swiftly trying to take her body into his arms. "Aeris!" he cried as he did so, but he could feel nothing though he held the lifeless form. Only the air that surrounded. "Aeris...No...not again." he was ready to weep for her, and in a way he had been the last two years, in his own silent way. His form seemed to shake slightly as he looked up with an expression mixed of confusion, anger, and sorrow, to see those emerald green eyes, his face, lips curved upwards slightly into a sadistic smirk.
Suddenly it all vanished, as if it had never happened. He knelt there beside where she had fallen, staring at the place. Was it a hallicination? It had to have been...
"What's wrong with me...?"he muttered, "Am I going crazy...?"
He drew himself slowly to his feet, testing his balance, holding back the expression of sorrow, how he wanted to cry, yet never truly had. He couldn't let her go. He walked across the floor, heavy boots making nearly no noise, save for the occasional creak that accompanied his pace. He walked past the pews, and through the doorway, not looking back. He had to get away...get away from it all. So long that church had been like his home, a place to return to when nothing else had felt safe.
He had barely managed to find a pathway for Fenrir to fit through. It was a custom made motorcycle with 8 sword compartments, built like a street bike. He mounted it, pausing a moment to grip his arm lightly, not bothering to conceal a wince as the pain throbbed in his left arm. It was dull usually, but had taken to becoming worse over time. Not only that but it had begun to spread to other parts of his body, and he knew that if he did not survive the mutation process, he would die.
Shaking his head, he ended his thoughts, and turned the key ignition. He then wheeled Fenrir around as it satisfied him with a purr. He pushed off and sped into the distance, dodging large pieces of debree, and the old mako reactor pipeline that ran through the city. As he rode, he could recall everything that had happened, all the people that had died...because he hadn't been strong enough to save him. His expression slowly grew dark, and he could hardly think on it anymore. The wind that blew sharply, bitingly at him seemed to condemn him and he did not fight it.
He pulled into Kalm just as the sun was setting, yet it was hardly noticable due to a thick forboding gray shroud. He parked off in the front, locking the compartments and pocketing his keys. He unmounted, stepping lightly onto his feet and neared the bar that had been newly errected only a year or so ago. The owner, he'd known since he was a kid. She built this bar to serve her expertly mixed drinks, but it had other uses now, along with new additions. It was closed for now, and he guessed why. After he had saved the orphans, they had all come to live here, or at least, the surviving ones anyway.
He took in a breath and let it out slowly, raising one hand to knock quietly on the door. Before his hand could even fall to the first knock, the door opened and he was greeted by a bright smile from little Marlene. "Cloud! It's good to see you!" She said as she went to hug his leg. She was only six after all.
She was a short pale skinned little girl, her hair pulled back, tied by a pink bow, then twisted into a ropebraid. Just like Aeris's had been, he noted, except the child didn't have the bangs.
He let out a low chuckle as one hand rested on her head. His eyes shone in the dark, stating the emotions at the forefront, but his expression told different. It warmed into a smile. "Hey there...is Tif-"but he was suddenly cut off.
From the front and both sides, he was piled onto, clung to and hugged. "Cloud!" "Cloud's back!" came the chorus of young voices as he was knocked flat on his back.
"oof! Hey watch it..."he laughed a bit, even though they had hit the sensitive areas on his side and arm. "Where'd ya go?" asked Marcus, a small black haired boy with green eyes. He was one out of the group of midgar orphans. "What took ya so long?" poked a little girl by the name of Maria. She was a fair girl with short chesnut hair and blue eyes, only at the age of eight, much smaller than she should have been. "Come on, cloud! tell us!" another chorus, "Yeah!" came the other's voices.
He laughed a bit, "I'm supposed to do this with you all on me...?" he moved to tickle one of the children. "Eight against one..just isn't fair."
"Is so!" chided Maria, "You're bigger than us!" "yeah!" "You are!",the the others agreed.
Tifa stood in the doorway trying not to laugh. She was not very tall, but not short either, her figure was one hard to resist for most men. Dark brown, nearly black, hair fell to the small of her back, while mahogany eyes watched them in amusement.
"Tifa...Help me..."he said in the most desperate voice he could muster, giving her an absolutely pathetic look.
She shook her head, no longer stifling the laugh, before allowing it to fade as she spoke. "You got yourself into it, and you can get yourself out." She smirked slightly as she finished.
"You're so cold..."he said with a mock tone of annoyance.
After a few more minutes of him having to endure such "horrible torture", she was no longer able to withstand his pleading look.
"Oh stop that, come on kids, dinner." she said lightly and shook her head as the stampede of children rushed past her. She moved promptly to the right of the stairs and out of the way as they raced up it, their flurry of voices even heard downstairs.
"Come on soldier, you eating too?" She asked, half grinning. The delicious smell of food drifted downstairs, the aroma almost teasing him.
He sat up and chuckled a bit, "Nah...not hungry." Pushing himself up off the ground with slight difficulty, he concealed a wince as he stood. Sometimes the children were a little rough. Then again, they didn't really know how bad his sickness was.
"Well, come inside. There's enough room to at least sit, you know. Let me get you a drink.." she offered as she watched his movements.
"Water's fine." he replied and then turned slightly when he noticed something out of place. A lone child, dressed in clothes of ruddy brown, stood behind him. His hair was slightly curly and was always messy or out of place. He had been one the sickest. His eyes were catlike and a bright emerald green color. A slit down the center served as his pupil. Even though the three brothers, Kadaj, Loz, and Yazoo, had been defeated.. he had never recovered from geostigma.
"Denzel?" Tifa asked, blinking a bit. He was supposed to have been inside.
"I'm going...to die aren't I?" he asked, looking down at the ground and then up at her, his eyes full of an emotion that could not be spoken aloud. "Cloud is too...isn't he?"
A visible look of worry entered her features, as a frown engraced onto her face. "No...not today Denzel. Everyone dies someday, you know that. It'll be alright, okay?" She made a attempt to cover up her concern with a smile as she gestured him inside.
Cloud watched the scene in silence, understanding what the boy was thinking and why. He had been through alot. His cold ice blue eyes seemed to come out from their hardened state. Denzel was only a child.
The boy began to walk inside yet, instead paused a moment to look back at Cloud.
"It's calling us...I think...the planet wants us to return." His voice was quiet as he turned and progressed up the stairs to join the other children. Though it was not visible, he had several bandages wrapped around his body underneath his clothes.
Cloud's face became more stoic, as if thinking, his eyes distant for a few moments. He noticed Tifa's eyes on him. "It's okay Tifa..."he smiled at her, forcefully."I'm not planning to die anytime soon." He said one thing but was thinking the opposite. He doubted she would want to hear what he was planning. I am dying...and the hallicinations are getting worse...
Taking off his gear, he laid it beside the door. Then, following her upstairs, he took to leaning against the wall, being the wallflower that he was, and sipping his glass of water. He watched in amusement as the children talked amongst themselves, seeming not to worry about anything. There were more than eight, those beingthe ones he had been greeted by. As he counted silently he knew in all, there were thirteen. Some had died, and everytime one had passed it was that much harder on him.
Tifa had been able to convince the children that they were only asleep and that they would come back one day, they would meet again. In a sense she was right, if the promised land really was what everyone knew it to be. After the meal, he was dragged away from his wall with a laugh by the younger children, who begged him to tell them a story. They wanted to know what he and the others had done, more than what they had only seen, but he never went into mass detail, the emotions that he felt didn't need to be voiced to them.
He had ended up with Marcus leaning over the back of the couch onto his shoulder, Marlene curled up contently against him, and a few children at his feet, the others piled onto the couch, or the chair nearby. The room was fairly large, a window with blinds directly to his right, and a chair to his left. A large area rug adorned the hardwood floor. Tifa had always been picky about that. She never liked carpet very much, never could afford the upkeep. Especially with little kids romping through the house all day.
She was currently watching him, wondering who would have thought he would have gotten along so well with them?
After a few minutes had passed she sighed a bit, she hated putting an end to this.
"Alright kids, bedtime." she said, glancing at the clock that hung in the kitchen area beside the living room. The kitchen was furnished with broad counters, and she had placed the cups, bowls and plates to where they could be easily accessed. Fortunately the stove was always too high for the little ones to reach.
There were cupboards above the counters where she usually stored the canned food, and other parishable items that she preferred them not to reach. The sink was positioned directly between them, the stove near it. Then, on the right a large table with benches, still laden with leftovers from their dinner. The children had enough courtesy however, to clear them and pile them by the sink, except for the very young ones.
She had gotten a chorus of "Awwwwww..."'s and "No fair."'s. "Can't we stay up later?" Pleaded Angelus, a younger black haired boy with obsidian slanted eyes, he was obviously from Wutai. "Yes please?" pleaded another young girl who was twelve years of age, who had long curly blonde hair and gray eyes.
"I think Cloud's a little tired. Why don't you ask him?" She shook her head slightly and folded her arms loosely across her chest.
Cloud watched her the whole time, chuckling a bit, "Yeah..I am kinda tired kids...come on now, I'll take you to bed."
He stood to his feet and cradled Marlene, while Marcus defiantly clung to his right shoulder, gripping onto his leather shoulder guard with a grin. He made sure they were dressed and then put them to bed, the little boy clinging the whole time. He chuckled. "Enjoying yourself back there?" he asked as he covered Marlene up. She snuggled right down into her comforter, half drowsy as it was.
He plucked the boy off his shoulder and placed him in his bed laughing quietly. "Alright..off we go."
"Goodnight Cloud." some of the ones who were still awake said with an air of sleepiness in their voices.
"Night..."he said ruffling Marcus's hair. "See ya later."
The room was lined with 15 beds, Tifa had had to alter the orginal layout of the bar, but that was alright, he had supplied the money and now it wasn't a problem. A few beds were empty since the other children had passed away, there had been more than just that though. There were a few dressers and bedside tables with lamps, a window lay at the end of the room, the light from the streetlamps filtering in. He sighed a bit, slipping in silence out of the room.
"So...how long are you staying?" Tifa asked, a slight smile on her lips. She obviously was worried about him, but he didn't really know how to react. She had already taken the liberty of scraping a few of the dishes which needed it as he neared the sink.
"..." Turning the knobs as it filled up, "Not very..."he answered truthfully,tugged off his gloves. His eyes glinted dully as he set to washing the dishes so he wouldn't have to focus on her face.
"I see, so...not even the night again." a note of melancholy entered her voice, her brown eyes, undertoned with a reddened hue, seemed to probe him as she laid the plate aside and took up another one.
"Yeah..."he said solemnly.
"The kids miss you everytime you leave you know..." She scraped the dish clean looking down at it when he refused to meet her eyes. "So do I."
"I'm sorry..."he said distantly, washing the dishes, stacking them in the dishdrainer.
"Cloud..I'm worried about you. I haven't seen you in a few weeks, and each time you leave you stay out longer. What if one day you don't come back?" she inquired, her voice having grown more gentle, her feelings conveyed through it.
"I'll be fine."
"You're not fine. You always say that." she persisted. "Please, just stay for a little longer...?" she pleaded.
"Then I'm not fine...and I can't...happy?" he was growing slightly irritated, more with himself than with her.
"No, I'm not..." her lips pursed together lightly, her eyes downcast as the minutes passed without them saying a word.
"I saw her again today..." He said after a long moment. "She..
was in the church." His voice seemed to lose the stoic tone to it.
"Saw who?" she asked, her eyebrows raising in question.
"I see her almost everyday..."he continued. "But...she never talks anymore. She just looks at me...kills me all over again with the look in her eyes...she runs away from me..."he seemed to barely say the last part of his sentence.
"She's dead..." The brunette said softly after a moment's pause. "You know she is, you have to stop living in the past Cloud.." Her tone held a note of genuine concern.
"I know...I...think they are calling me."
She stopped what she was doing and searched his face as he slowly turned it to look at her. The look in his eyes was heartrending.
"I'm already dying Tifa...you know I am. You've known for a long time..."His voice regained its old nearly emotionless tone. "So I...I wanted to say goodbye."
"No." She said stubbornly. How many times had he done this to her? How much longer could he keep doing it to her? "You're coming back." Her tone was commanding, but fell slightly to a question her heart fluttering violently in her chest. "Right?"
"I don't know..." he said simply, his strong demeanor had seemed to have fled from him now. "If there's time."
"But what if..." she bit her lower lip as she placed what she was holding on the countertop, nearing him. "Don't Cloud..."
"Don't touch me. You know I'm infected." he said, stepping back from her.
"I don't care!" She said, her voice trembling. "What about the children? Don't they mean anything to you! What about...what about me?" She stepped closer, looking up into his face.
"You'll manage somehow, you're strong..."he said, hesitantly raising a hand to tuck away a few stray tendrils behind her left ear.
"Come back. Promise me you will." She knew her tone sounded desperate, but in truth, she felt she was. He was the last person from her past that she had left.
"I can't promise anything..." Already he had a sea of broken promises that would never be fulfilled, there was no use trying to make ones he knew he could not keep. He blinked and was taken back slightly as she suddenly wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug, leaning against his chest. Awkwardly, he moved his arms to hug her in return. He had never exactly been that great with women.
He knew that once, he may have desired this so strongly, but not anymore. "I'm sorry..." he said as his arms fell to his sides and she let go reluctantly. "You've...been a great friend."
Her eyes glittered with unshed tears, her cheeks hot with frustration. "Same...to you Cloud." she replied almost in a whisper and turned to walk out of the room and into her own. A friend...that was all she ever would be to him. She'd done her best to be content with that over the years..perhaps she was just being selfish. She should just be happy with what she did have.
He watched her go and deep in himself he was screaming. He loved her yes, but not in the way he had loved Aeris. He would never reach that level of affection or care with her. He wasn't capable of giving anyone what they truly needed. "I'm sorry." he said to the darkness, lingering a few more minutes, savouring this last time. He pulled his gloves back on before he moved down the stairs clipping his sword to his back and vanishing into the night. There was only one place he desired strongly to see, one last time.
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AN: What do you think? Be sure to review and tell us! We'll be posting up new chapters as quickly as possible with Deb's uncharted internet times. Arigatou Gozaimasu :bows: Sayonara.