'Are you in love with him?'
She laughed in disbelief 'What?'
'You heard me'
'Why do you not trust me? Oh wait I already know the answer to that. No I am not in love with Carter Buckley'
'Then why were you all over him tonight'
'Well at least it got some reaction from you' she spat.
'What's that meant to mean?' he replied.
'Did it make you jealous? Did it annoy you? Upset you?'
'Kirsten?' he was utterly confused. He didn't really believe deep down that she had feelings for Carter but he hadn't expected this reaction.
'Why do you think I've been spending so much time at the office, with Carter?' she didn't let him speak but continued' because you left me Sandy, you abandoned me, I had no other choice. I wanted to make you feel just a fraction of what I felt'.
'Kirsten what are you talking about, I'd never leave you what?' He shook his head oblivious to what she was getting at. He tried to close the physical gap between them, a gap which had been growing significantly for some time. She however, flinched as he approached her.
She was seething, her blood pressure rising, he really didn't get it. 'What, you thought that once Rebecca left everything would go back to normal, are you kidding me?'
'We're talking about Rebecca again?' he responded as if the matter had been discussed in minute detail previously.
'Again? No Sandy we never talked about Rebecca. How she suddenly appeared and you fell for her all over again, spending nights with her, leaving me on my own, not ringing, need I go on?' tears were streaming down her face. 'You choose her all over again. You confirmed my worst fears, that I would always be second to her. You'II never understand what it felt like when you walked out that door on Valentines Day! Ever since the day I found out about Rebecca a story which I might add you refused to tell me about when we were in college I knew you would always have feelings for her but I was so in love with you that I took a chance' and with that she turned and left the room. 'And you know I realise now what a fool I was to believe you when you promised you'd never break my heart'.
He decided to venture up towards the bedroom an hour or so later, He thought she might have cooled down, maybe give him a chance to explain, apologise. He had been so stupid, he knew that, he had treated her so badly during the Rebecca fiasco and she was right. Did he really think a plastic ring was going to make up for all the hurt he'd caused. It frightened him to see her so insecure, he may not have acted like it but she was his world. What if she left him? He couldn't carry on with out her. He began to panic, he needed to do something. He knocked on their bedroom door, before entering. She was in their bathroom. He changed into his pyjamas. Was she going to let him sleep next to her? She exited the bedroom, he examined her face another wave of guilt passing over him when he say her beautiful tear stained face. She made no effort to look at him, not even acknowledging his presence she quickly got into bed and turned her back to him. She had contemplated sleeping in the guest room, but that would mean they had serious problems and she wasn't ready to except that they had become one of those couples. Usually when they had a fight, one of them would cave and they'd subsequently have mind-blowing sex. But this was different and what's more it petrified her, What if she lost him? What if he decided to call it quits, which would be the easy thing to do right? Everyone had said from the beginning they were too different. She squeezed her eyes shut, willing sleep to come.
'Kirsten' he whispered in the dark. He received no reply. Thinking she was asleep he continued 'I just want you to know that I take full responsibility for what's happened to us. It's my entire fault and I am so sorry for screwing up so badly. You may not believe it but you will always be my one and only. I just lost my path for a while and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you but just please don't give up on us! I just don't know what I'd do. I just want us to be happy again', He was secretly hoping that she would turn around and forgive him but even he knew he had crossed the line this time and even though she probably would forgive him eventually, she would never forget.
After hearing this, her will almost broke and she almost gave into temptation wanting so badly to reach out to him but she stopped herself. This wasn't a normal fight where he had merely done something to piss her off, no she was going to make him prove his promise. They needed to get back on firm ground so he was going to have to earn her trust again.
She felt such warmth as she awoke from her sleep, there were arms wrapped tightly around her as she was almost on top of Sandy's chest. How was it that even when they were having the worst fight in the world they still managed to find each other during the night. She allowed herself one more minute to bask in what seemed to her like heaven before she reluctantly got up and left the bedroom. Sandy had been awake for at least an hour watching Kirsten sleep on top of him, petrified that this would be the last time she did. She looked so beautiful so innocent. Why had he gone and taken her for granted? His eyes had clamped shut when he registered that she had woken. She had laid there for a moment sighing quietly before exiting. He had to do something to win her back he just had no idea what.
'Kirsten'
'Hey Carter'
'Want to meet me for breakfast?'
She almost instinctively agreed but then remembered what Sandy had said. Was she in love with Carter? No attracted maybe but definitely not love. She just liked having someone's undivided attention, it used to be that way with Sandy- she'd enter the room and he'd drop everything else. However, now that she thought about it she really had been spending to much time with Carter, she felt guilty, not just for Sandy but about the lack of time she had been spending with the boys. She then glanced at the picture on the fridge. They looked so happy as a couple. No she was not going to give up on them. Yes he had hurt her and they had a lot of issues to sort out but it was worth it. Sandy was everything to her and she wasn't going to give Rebecca Bloom the satisfaction of tearing her family apart.
'Listen Carter I'm actually taking today off so I'II see you in the office on Monday. Bye'. She hung up before he could reply. She decided that the situation needed to be confronted. As she poured coffee for herself she instinctively poured a cup for Sandy. Even this simple gesture made her tear up. How had things got so bad? She loved him more then anything and after his from the heart statement last night she knew he still loved her. Maybe it was time to make a new start on their relationship. She grabbed the two mugs of coffee and headed towards the bedroom. He was sitting at the table on the far side of the room frantically looking for something in a cardboard box. He jumped when he felt her touch his arm. He turned around and she handed him the coffee. Their eyes met and for the first time in a long time only silent communication was needed to convey the message. She was ready to forgive, he was sorry, they both loved each other and they would make it work like they always did. 'We need to talk….'
Lots of kandy and angst coming up. Let me know what you think it'II motivate me. I miss my favourite show ;(