Disclaimer: All characters/registered names are not mine, and owned by their respective owners, and are used for entertainment purposes...
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Bold underline indicates a caption on the TV screen
Special Thanks to my buddy NewLyfe06 for editing/proofreading for me...
Drew: Good evening everybody and welcome to a special One hour Love Hina edition of Whose Line is it Anyway—on tonight's show, Shinobu's favorite singer, Wayne Brady (smiles brightly); Captain Hair, Colin Mochrie (imitates Dr. Evil with pinky in mouth); too tall for the Hinata-Sou walkways, Ryan Stiles (acts like he's steering and shifting gears), and special guest, Landlord of Hinata-Sou, Keitaro Urashima (throws hands in air like he doesn't care)! And, I'm your host, Drew Carey, c'mon down and let's have some fun!
Drew: Welcome to the special Love Hina edition of Whose Line is it Anyway-the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter. That's right the points don't matter, just like Kentaro's role—it doesn't matter.
Kentaro: What the hell?
Drew: Quick Colin, do Jurassic Park!
(Colin gets up as a T-rex and chases Kentaro off screen, while everyone laughs)
Drew: That was great Colin, he didn't see that one coming! (Colin waves and smiles) Hey, for a special bonus, the Hina Girls (Except Haruka) know nothing of this taping of Whose Line in Hinata-Sou. We have used a spare room to house the improvisers, and myself, while placing several hidden cameras, mics, and speakers (for the buzzer and doorbell) around Hinata-Sou that even Kaolla Suu herself can't find. That's right, 60 minutes of the regular Whose Line action packed fun, all in Hinata-Sou! Also, normally at the end we pick a winner, and they get to do a little something special with me, but in the second to last game, we will reveal ourselves to the Hina girls, and we will pick one of them as a winner to star in the last game. Ready to get started and see how this works?
(The audience cheers)
Drew: Our first game is called 'Superheros' and it's for all four of you with a Twist. You're all going to act out a scene as unlikely superheroes; Keitaro, you're going to start followed by Colin, Ryan and Wayne. They're each going to make up each other's superhero names as they come in and to add a twist, we've just spilled the last of Naru's tea on the floor in the front foyer, and Keitaro is going to go down there as a superhero, while the other three sneak around to the front door to jump in. Now, what I need from the audience is a name of an unlikely superhero for Keitaro.
(audience yelling suggestions)
Drew: I heard Captain Crys-a-lot! So Captain Crys-a-lot, what are you gonna do!
Keitaro: Riiiiiight…
(Kei runs downstairs as Naru proceeds to yell about the dirty floor and panic about no more tea)
Naru: My tea! Keitaro, you gotta clean this up and find a way for me to get more tea in the next 20 seconds so I can study or else!
Keitaro: (gulps, then assumes character role as bawling) Oh No! They said don't cry over spilt tea! WAAAAH! I hope my super-friends arrive soon!
Colin: (jumping in) I hurried in as fast as I could!
Keitaro: (weeping) WAAAH! Thank goodness you're here Butt-Buffer Man! Naru's tea spilled making a mess and there's no more tea here!
(Naru is left speechless with the arrival of Colin, audience laughs)
Colin: (sits on the floor pretending his butt is an electric floor buffer with appropriate noises) What are we gonna do! (Looks at Naru) I need a towel to wipe the spill with!
(Naru grabs a towel and gives it to Colin when Ryan nonchalantly walks in)
Ryan: I was sleeping until I was splashed in the face by green tea falling from the ceiling!
Colin: (buffing the floor still) Oh, It's 'Bumps-His-Head-On-Everything Man'!
Ryan: (giving Colin a dirty look; bumps his head on the ceiling beam) OW! What's wrong here!
Keitaro: There's spilt tea on the floor and There's no more here!
Ryan: (hits his head on the floor while Colin butt-buff's the mess up with the towel) OW! Why did this tea have to get spilt in the first place!
Wayne: (Jumps in) I'm sorry I was caught in traffic!
Ryan: (hits head on door) Wow it's the OW South Park Chef Man!
Keitaro: Waaah! Chef-man, there's this spill and Naru has no more tea!
Wayne: Now, now, children, there's plenty of lovin' to go around!
Naru: Keitaro, what's your problem and who are these people!
Wayne: I got it! My chef's hat can finish the butt-buffing and Kyle gave me this box of green tea for my birthday yesterday that I hate! (Gives the unopened box to Naru, who again is speechless) Got to go now, my Chocolate Salty Balls are burning! (runs out)
Keitaro (sobbing) W-w-why couldn't I think of that? T-th-thanks, South Park Chef Man…
Ryan: OW! This ceiling is too low for me! I'm gonna go check the plumbing under my house! (runs away)
Keitaro: (Now weeping) B-b-but, isn't there a l-l-lot of p-p-pipes to hit your h-h-head on? (sighs) Oh well!
Colin: (throws towel out of view and feels his butt) Oh, I knew I should have brought toilet paper! See ya!
Keitaro: (weeping) An-nother crisis av-verted….
BUZZ-buzz-buzz-buzz!
Naru: What the hell is your problem crybaby! (Smashes Keitaro's face into the floor) You're such a pervert for having a guy clean the floor with his butt, but at least the tea makes up for it…
Keitaro: (Bawling) WAAAAH! I need to go to the bathroom! (runs upstairs quickly and disappears to the spare room, and locks the door, while everyone laughs.) That was absolutely great. Naru is still in shock!
Naru: (back downstairs) What the hell was that buzzing sound?
Drew: That was fantastic, I give you each 1000 points and a bonus 5000 points to Keitaro for getting his face smashed into the butt-cleaned floor.
Ryan: That girl was clueless. I think she was scared of my height.
Colin: Well you are taller than some trees! (Drew Laughs)
Drew: Alright, lets continue with a game called 'Weird Newscasters' for all four of you. Colin, you are gonna be the anchor on a local news program, Keitaro, you are the co-anchor. Keitaro, you are gonna play Naru Narusegawa who has had a bit too much to drink—just like when she hangs out with Kitsune, right?
Keitaro: (Chuckling) Naru's gonna be pissed!
Drew: Hey, that's theater, right? Wayne's doing the sports, and Wayne, you are a werewolf on a chain with a shock-collar.
Wayne: (Laughing hysterically) What!
Drew: (Shows Wayne the card, Laughing) Sorry man, it's comedy, right? OK, Ryan, you are doing the weather as usual, and you are psycho with a chainsaw!
Ryan: I did that in a previous episode! (sighs)
Drew: Yes, but it's funny. You can slay the werewolf if you want.
Ryan: Yesss! Ok, you got it.
Drew: Now the Love Hina edition twist to this game is that the girls are all in the Living Room thinking the normal news is coming on. But, as usual Haruka knows the true details and will clue them in that this is a new newscast, and, as usual, the captions will show to add a twist. So Colin, as soon as you hear the music, start this sad newscast.
(Meanwhile, downstairs, the girls are in the living room, and Haruka speaks up)
Haruka: Well, the news is fixing to come on. Kitsune, will you change to channel 4?
Kitsune: Sure, Haruka, but doesn't the news come on channel 10?
Haruka: This is supposed to be a comical look at the news, kind of like 'The Daily Show' but it's directed by Drew Carey…
Motoko: Are you sure you want the news in comedy form?
Naru: Yeah and where is that idiot Keitaro? He always watches the news with us…
Motoko: I don't care that he doesn't show up! I like the peace and quiet with no peeping.
Naru: He had some goofy friends show up earlier to clean up a stupid spill, and they were all acting like weird superheroes, while Keitaro cried like a baby.
Haruka: (secretly giggles) Keitaro said he had to go run an errand, so he will miss the news with us.
Shinobu: That's too bad… Come to think of it, I haven't seen him all morning. I hope he is ok.
(News comes on and Music Starts)
Naru: Is that Keitaro sitting on that chair next to the anchor? What the hell is he doing there?
(Girls start muttering comments about Keitaro on TV)
Kitsune: Shut up, y'all, let's see what this is about…
Colin: Welcome to the morning news. I'm your anchor, Don… Ask-me-for-anymore-money-kitsune. (Drew Laughs, Motoko mutters something on the lines of 'Is he for real?' whilst Kitsune mutters 'did he just say my name?') Our top story today: Tragedy was strangely averted after famous pop-singer Amy Lee from Evanescence tried to cross a street that was being repaved, and was experiencing rush-hour. The singer was violently flung around by 14 cars, 2 buses and an 18-wheeler, all traveling at speeds in excess of 50 miles per hour. She then landed on a lane covered in hot asphalt face-first, where she was flattened by a steamroller, after which she got up, dusted herself off, and simply stated to horrified onlookers before leaving the scene, "My Immortal…" (Drew laughs more)
Colin: And now over to my co-anchor Hinata Dat-good-in-bed. Hinata…
Keitaro: Naru Narusegawa who has had a bit too much to drink Today, thaaat daaamn perrert walkt-int haaasprings on-us giiirls again.
Naru: I don't act like that towards him!
Suu/Shinobu: Yes you do, Naru!
Keitaro: (Starts swaying, acting like he is launching a Naru punch) I shooowd him a thiig-or-to. (falls off stool, then gets back up and looks to Colin) Saaaaay, you think-my b-b-breaaaasts are ge-ing biiigerrr?
Colin: (looking at Keitaro's chest) I would say they look closer to mosquito bites myself.
Keitaro: Whyyyy-I-outta… (acts like he is fixing to barf)
Colin: More on that coming up later.
(All the Girls except Naru are laughing)
Naru: That damn idiot. I'm gonna cremate him when he gets back!
Suu: Does cremate taste good?
Kitsune: Hey Naru, will you tell him to bring me back some more sake?
All girls: NO!
Colin: And now over to our big guy in sports, Joe Bigtooth! Joe...
Wayne: Werewolf on a chain with a shock collar Aroooooh! Today in the football game the Steelers made a 20 yard drive like this… (starts running acting like he is in the game, and… ZAP!) Arooooh, that hurt. I am hungry! (Runs towards Keitaro, growling and… ZAP!) What the… (ZAAAAP!) Damn!
Colin: Thanks for that shocking report! Speaking of Shocking, lets go to our favorite weatherman, Jason, for the latest on the lightning! Jason!
Ryan: Psycho with a chainsaw (Acts like he is starting a chainsaw) Rnnnnnng! Rnnng! Rnnngggggggggngngngngnggggg! We're expecting typhoons in Hokkaido today… So lets just get rid of Hokkaido! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (Acts like he is cutting Hokkaido off the map)
Wayne: (Snarling Viciously)
Keitaro: (barfs towards Wayne)
Ryan: (chainsaw) grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (chasing after Wayne, cuts Wayne's leg)
Wayne: (squealing in pain) Oww oww oww oww! ZAP! Owwww! ZAP!
Colin: And that's all the time we have for the news today, join us again tomorrow morning! Good Day!
BUZZZZ!
(Haruka changes the channel)
Haruka: That was informative… Let's see what is on 'The View'…
Naru: What the hell was going on with that news show? They were all weird!
Motoko: That man was on it as well, and he was mocking you, Naru…
Shinobu: I actually thought it was kinda funny. I didn't know Keitaro did good impersonations. That sports guy looks kinda familiar…
Suu: I want bananas… Oh, that Jason guy needs to loan me his chainsaw for my new Mecha-Tama invention! Can we get Keitaro to ask him for us?
Naru: First off, that tall guy can't be named Jason. Those 3 guys with Keitaro on that newscast were the same guys acting like those stupid superheroes when I made the pervert clean the tea off the floor!
Motoko: What is that perverted idiot up to?
-Meanwhile-
Drew: That was great, I give Wayne 50,000 points for acting like he was getting shocked all the time, and Keitaro, 10,000 for throwing up all over the place!
Keitaro: Awesome. This is easier than my Tokyo U entrance exams!
Drew: We'll be right back after these commercials, so don't go anywhere!
Well guys, please give me some reviews. I have just finished Chapter 2 (the second segment of the 'show') and it looks good so far. Also, one game I plan on including later on in the show will be 'Quick Change' and it will involve the girls.. Thats the only spoiler I'm giving so far...