Saturday, Oct. 11, 1986

Well, today was the day that the doctors (Dr. Doyle Ferguson and Dr. Isabel Schaeffer) tied the knot. I don't know what it is about weddings, but they do start you thinking about taking the plunge. Of course, I've never found Ms. Right, but I did meet a lovely woman at the reception.

Her name is Angela Bower, and she is angelic. She's a tall but not too tall, slender but not skinny, blonde (OK, probably not natural). And she's intelligent and sensitive, too. With a good sense of humor. And not a bad dancer either. Not to mention she's very driven and successful, as head of her own ad agency.

Her housekeeper introduced us. He said—Yes, he. Well, it's the '80s. Anyway, he said we were each other's type. She's certainly mine, and I think she likes me, too. She said yes to a date on Friday.

Saturday, Oct. 18, 1986

Me and my girl went to Me and My Girl last night. OK, she's not my girl yet, but we did have a great first kiss. And we're going out again next weekend.

Saturday, Oct. 25, 1986

Angela had to cancel on me. Her son had a gymnastics injury. The weird thing is, I thought he was more the bookish type.

I haven't met him yet. She wants to wait till things get more serious. I have to admit I'm not in any hurry. I don't hate kids or anything, but I'm not great with them. But she is a great woman, and I want to keep seeing her (we'll try again next weekend), so maybe I will meet Nathan down the road.

But probably not till his cast comes off in six weeks.

Saturday, Nov. 15, 1986

Angel (my new pet name for her) and I went out to dinner with her friends (and Dr. Isabel's), Herb and Wendy Wittener. When the ladies came back from the ladies' room (why is it they never go alone?), I overheard Wendy say, "Well, he's not as cute of course, but Geoff isn't bad." I almost corrected her that it's Geoffrey, but I didn't want her to know I was eavesdropping.

It just goes to show how love can blind you. To me, Herb seems bland and boring, but after all their years of marriage, Wendy still thinks he's cute. I also resisted saying, "At least I have a full head of hair."

Saturday, Nov. 29, 1986

Well, I met Jonathan (without his cast, he got it off a week early) and I think it went OK. Angel was nervous about it and kept it short, just a quick introduction when I picked her up tonight. Tony's teenaged daughter was babysitting the kid, since her dad had a date that night.

I have to admit, though I try to be a modern man, I do have moments when I feel a little, not jealous, but weird about Angel's living situation. I believe her when she says that there's nothing but friendship between her and Tony. OK, it is unusual to be "friends" with your servants. I mean, I don't watch horror movies with my cleaning lady, and I wouldn't even if she was a live-in. And Angel is a classy, educated, successful woman, so of course she wouldn't have anything to do with Tony romantically, even if he didn't work for her. I mean, not to be snobbish, but he did grow up in Brooklyn! And he's a jock and she cares nothing about sports.

But that doesn't mean he might not be attracted to her. I mean, who could blame him? So it's a relief to me that he goes out with other women, and from the sound of it, she's not his type. It doesn't say much for his intelligence that he can't appreciate her, but I'm fine with that. The important thing is, I appreciate her.

In fact, I'm thinking of asking her to go away to Maine with me next weekend. I think we're ready for that next step in our relationship. You know I don't like to rush into things, but it's been a few weeks and I really like her.

Not to kiss and tell, but there's not much to tell about besides kissing. But I want more and I think she does, too.

Monday, Dec. 8, 1986

Well, that was a mixed weekend.

Angel looked like an angel, all in white (well, off white) when I picked her up on Friday. The Saab looked good, too, as I'd had it waxed and detailed.

But we never made it to Maine. We got lost on the way and ended up back at her place. Then we had our first fight. But we were able to laugh about it, so it was a milestone.

I thought we could maybe cozy up at her place (I'd see about getting a refund on the hotel in Maine), since everyone else was out of the house. The kids were in Washington, and Tony had a date in Brooklyn.

But one minute Angel and I were playing Eskimo, rubbing noses together, and the next thing Tony walked in carrying his date in his arms. I guess he never made it to Brooklyn.

Then Angel's mother stopped by for a moment. I don't know how a nice, classy woman like Angel ended up with a mother like that, but there you are. Mona is, ahem, a bit wilder than Angel. OK, she sleeps around. She was with a snowplow-driver that night. And guess what happened to my Saab? Yeah, it's a Saab story, ha ha.

Angel talked to Tony in the kitchen. I don't know what she said, but he and his date took off for Brooklyn. Angel and I were alone at last.

But after a very nice kiss, she suddenly said she couldn't relax at home. I know, it didn't make any sense to me either, but clearly it was not going to work for us at her place. So I suggested we take her car to the Fairfield Inn. She thought that was a great idea.

We got a beautiful suite. Unfortunately, I had a mishap with the fireplace and the room filled with smoke.

But we sipped some champagne as we waited for the air to clear out. That was nice, except for Angel thinking she heard Tony when the people next door spoke Italian, even though we knew he was in Brooklyn. She swears that there's nothing between the two of them, and I still believe her. But it is funny how he kept affecting our date.

Still, we, well, I'm too much of a gentleman to say much even in my journal. But let me just say that we took things to the next level. I think it went pretty well. Angel is very sweet and affectionate. I felt bad that she didn't, well, you know. But she said she hardly ever does and I shouldn't worry about it, especially since it was our first time.

I suggested we stay an extra night, but she said she'd brought a lot of work home with her and she did want to get to it by Monday. I was disappointed, but there will be other weekends, hopefully ones that will go more smoothly.

Anyway, I had to get my Turbo towed out of the snow and then re-waxed and re-detailed.

Thursday, Dec. 11, 1986

Mother wants to meet not only Angel but her family, so she asked me to invite all three of them to spend Christmas Day with all of us (cousins and everyone as usual) at her house. Jonathan and I still haven't spent much time together, although I have given him some investment advice which he thanked me for. This will be a chance for everyone to get to know each other. And it might be fun having a kid around at that time of year.

Mother is really going all out, caterers and everything. It should be a blast!

Friday, Dec. 12, 1986

I told Angel about the invitation, and she seems excited about it. She did say Tony usually goes all out at Christmastime, but I think he'll be relieved to be spared all that work. We're spending tomorrow together at her place, getting our Christmas cards stamped and addressed, so it'll be a good time to ask Mona and Jonathan.

Saturday, Dec. 13, 1986

Well, Mona doesn't want to go, but that's probably just as well. Our mothers have very strong if different personalities, and I don't think they'd get along too well, although I suppose they'll have to meet eventually.

Tony seemed surprised about the change in plans, but he understood that Christmas is for families. Not that Angel and I are family yet, but who knows, someday?

Saturday, Dec. 20, 1986

I got diamond earrings and a rider for her insurance policy for Angel, and an ant farm and a Rubik's cube for Jonathan. I think they'll both be very pleased. I also got a little robot for Tony, to show that I accept his friendship with Angel.

Angel and I discussed it and, as a compromise, we'll open gifts at her place Christmas morning before heading to Mother's.

Friday, Dec. 26, 1986

Christmas went well. Mother and Angel seemed to get along. And I got to know Jonathan a little better.

I have to admit to being surprised that Tony could afford a crystal vase from Tiffany's as Angel's gift. After all, Angel pays him well, but not that well! It turned out that he sold his baseball card, from when he played for the Cardinals, in order to buy the vase. Then in an O. Henry twist, she bought the card for him, not knowing it was his own copy.

I'm glad we don't have miscommunication problems like that, but it's different when you're in a relationship, and when you have as much in common as we do. And she loved the earrings and the insurance rider.

Thursday, Jan. 1, 1987

Angel and I rang in the New Year together. I asked what her resolutions were, but she said she didn't have any. She's happy with herself the way she is. And so am I (happy with her as she is).

Saturday, Jan. 10, 1987

Angel's business apparently wasn't as successful as I initially thought. It's only recently that it's started showing a profit. Not that I'm a gold-digger of course. It's just she carries herself with such confidence, it's easy to be fooled.

She says Tony has been very supportive of her business, and it was his idea to start her own agency. She wants to throw a party to show her appreciation. Well, I can be supportive, too, so I'm happy to attend. I'll even bring the kazoos.

She's starting to include me in more of the little moments of her family, and in a funny sort of way her housekeeper is family to her. Well, he is kind of Jonathan's nanny, so I guess it makes sense.

Saturday, Jan. 17, 1987

The party for Tony went pretty well, except when Angel burst into tears. She has her sentimental side. She looked stunning in a red number with gold streaks, classy but sexy, with a slit up the side.

And my kazoos were a big hit.

Saturday, Jan. 24, 1987

As you know, the Saab never recovered from being snow-plowed under. But now I have a new beauty, a Porsche, pricey but worth it. It's got a telephone with voice-activated dialing and it can do 157 per.

Unfortunately, I have to leave my baby behind while I'm in Boston, and I can't leave it in my garage because it's being painted and the fumes might ruin the car's high gloss finish. Fortunately, I have a very responsible girlfriend who has agreed to look after it.

And, yes, this is another big step in our relationship. I might even let her drive it while I'm away.

Friday, January 30, 1987

How funny, I'm in Boston and I hear of a time-share opportunity in the Catskills. I'm not sure I could swing it by myself, but maybe Angel would be interested in sharing my share. I'll ask her about it when I get back. I know it's a big step, but I think we're ready for it.

Sunday, Feb. 1, 1987

I don't believe this! Angela wrecked my car! She swears it's an accident, but it's not like her to be accident-prone. OK, yes, she didn't know the neighbors' tree would fall on it, but what was the car doing outside the garage? If I can't trust her with something valuable, maybe I can't trust her at all.

We exchanged bitter words and agreed to dissolve our relationship. I can't imagine making up with her. And I'm glad I didn't mention the Catskills. Well, I still might try to afford it on my own, especially now that I'm back on the market. Not that I'm ready to date again, but when I am, it'll be a great place to meet women.

And it'll be a terrific tax write-off.

Monday, Feb. 2, 1987

I was sitting there watching morning news coverage of the groundhog (six more weeks of Winter), and I thought of how much I miss Angela. Not that she's like a groundhog, but she was my winter snugglebunny, and I feel so cold without her. But I said some pretty harsh things to her and I doubt she'd take me back, or even talk to me.

Tuesday, Feb. 3, 1987

I was desperate, so I asked Tony's advice. I told him how important she is to me. I even said that her happiness means so much to me that if she's better off without me, I'd leave her forever. But he said she's unhappy without me, so I begged him to get her to give me another chance.

I know she listens to him, and not just about the household. She must've this time, because soon we were back to Eskimo kisses. And she loved the red roses I brought her.

We did argue over who would pay the deductible, but it's my insurance and it was my car, and I should take care of it. Besides, I realized, I love her, and that's what really matters.

I don't know how she feels, but we're going to spend next weekend in the country. Yes, I hope it goes better than our attempt to get to Maine. But I think all these little bumps in the road are part of growing and getting closer. Our relationship is stronger than ever.

Monday, Feb. 9, 1987

Mmm, that was a nice weekend. Compared to the Maine weekend a couple months ago, well, we reached our destination, and I don't just mean Rhode Island. We've been working on Angel's little problem ever since the night at the Fairfield Inn and finally she got where she needed to be. I'm very happy I was able to take her there.

Wednesday, Feb. 11, 1987

I've been thinking it over, and I've decided to tell Angel about the time-share. As of Friday, we'll have been seeing each other 116 days. (I don't count the couple days of our break-up. And our first kiss wasn't till after midnight.)

I haven't told her anything about the time-share yet, just that there's something big I want to discuss with her on a Valentine's weekend in the mountains. That way she'll get to see how beautiful the time-share is and she'll be more likely to say yes.

Friday, Feb. 13, 1987

I don't know what went wrong. Angel and I were sitting there sipping wine by the light of the fire and the candles, after my gourmet dinner. She seemed receptive, but when I proposed the time-share, she burnt the brochure! Yes, I have an extra one, but that's not the point. She almost set me on fire! And not in a good way.

Then she stormed out of the room. I think she's repacking. Oh, she's coming back. Gotta go!

Saturday, Feb. 14, 1987

Angel and I cleared things up. She was expecting a different kind of proposal. When I realized this, I was thrilled. It never occurred to me that she'd marry me after only 116 days.

She did say she'll have to think about it, but I feel optimistic. After all, it's Valentine's Day!

I'm going to make a list of how perfect we are for each other.

Later that day

Poor Angel has laryngitis! I'm going over there. I know she can't talk, but if she's going to say yes, there are other ways to communicate it. And I have to know!

But first let me make a copy of the list for Angel. Do I have time to buy her roses? Nah, I'll skip it so she won't feel pressured.

Sunday, Feb. 15, 1987

Well, I got my answer. And it's over. It wasn't an ugly break-up but it was a break-up. She's such a sweet woman that even when she let me down, she did it gently. And, yes, the time-share's out of the question.

Why did she say no? She said it was because she couldn't say yes enthusiastically. I was sure she was the perfect woman for me, but I guess she's still searching for the perfect man. I love her enough to hope she finds him. But not right away.

Oct. 18, 1991

I missed the fifth-anniversary party for Drs. Ferguson and Schaeffer last week, but my new lady and I took them out to dinner last night. Abigail St. Clair (Harvard '83) hadn't met any of my friends yet, so this seemed a good opportunity. Plus, it was nice to catch up with Doyle and Isabel. For instance, his daughter Marci just started college.

And they told me gossip. Herb and Wendy Wittener split up. I guess she doesn't think he's so cute anymore.

And then Doyle said, "Do you remember Angela Bower?"

Isabel nudged him. I guess he'd forgotten I dated Angela. I haven't thought of her in years. Well, not much anyway.

"Oh, right, never mind," he said.

"No, it's OK. How's she doing?"

"Well, her ad agency is thriving."

"That's good." I glanced at Saint (my new pet name for her). She's not the jealous type, and goodness knows I'm over Angela, but I hesitated before I asked, "Is she seeing anyone?"

"Well, as a matter of fact, she's dating Tony."

"Tony? Not the Tony from Brooklyn? Tony her housekeeper?" Was he kidding me?

"He's not just a housekeeper," Isabel said defensively.

"Apparently not," Saint murmured.

"I mean he's gone back to college to become a teacher."

That surprised me almost as much, considering he wasn't exactly the intellectual type.

I managed to say I was very happy for them, but I admit to being puzzled and distracted through the rest of the meal. It's not that I didn't hear rumors over the years, but near as I could tell they weren't true. I'm sure she and Tony weren't involved at the time she was seeing me, unless she was cheating on me then and hiding it well. But then why did she expect me to propose? If it was just a physical thing with Tony, why would it have lasted all this time?

When I took Saint home, she proposed a theory. "Well, Angela Bower must be past 40 now. She's probably a little desperate."

"Hey, I'm over 40!" I protested.

"It's different for men. You get more distinguished and attractive. Angela's probably let herself go and the best she can do now is this bum from Brooklyn."

"He's not a bum." I liked Tony at the time. I thought of us as friends, although not close of course since we had so little in common.

"OK, but he's not in your league. She blew her chance with you and she has to settle."

I asked how she knew that I dated Angela and she said that Isabel told her when they went to the ladies' room. (Why is it they never go alone?) At least she's not jealous. And it is flattering that she thinks Tony is a step down from me. Because, Brooklyn and all that aside, he was a good-looking guy with a lot of charm, although I never would've thought he was Angela's type.

I think this discussion brought me and Saint closer. And later that night, well, let's just say I took her to Rhode Island.