1. Coffee (dramatic music plays)

"Gaara…" Naruto shook Gaara who was asleep on his desk. 'He's actually asleep….but of course it's the day I visit him….' They he thought about it. "Oh I know!' Naruto quickly sped out of the office and went to the lounge where he poured some tea. But it wasn't tea. The idiot poured black expresso coffee instead…but as usual he didn't notice. He ran back into the office to see Gaara waking up. He grabbed him and poured the hot liquid down his friends throat…almost choking him.

"Naruto! What the hell?!" Gaara said calmly.

"You were asleep…I came to visit and well I didn't know if you were going to wake up by tomorrow or not…so I gave you tea…" Naruto said smiling his genuine smile that showed how much of a knucklehead he was.

"Naruto…" Gaara began clearly showing he was annoyed. "That wasn't tea…its was coffee!" Gaara said standing up. Temari and Kankuro walked in at that point.

"Yo little bro! Whats up?!" Kankuro walks in with a grin plastered on his face. Temari hit him.

"He's Kazekage! Don't call him that when your in his office idiot!" she said knocking him on the head. Temari looked at the cup on Gaara's desk. "Gaara…what did he give you?"

"Coffee."

"What kind of coffee?" She asked curious.

"I'm not sure…" He looked at the cup. She walked over and took it smelling it.

'Expresso…' She got a worried look on her face now. She turned to Kankuro. "Kankuro…it…it's expresso…" Kankuro's eyed widened. He looked at Naruto who was confused.

"You ultimate idiot…giving him expresso is the worst thing you could possibly do!"

"Eh?" Naruto said tilting his head in confusion. Just then he turned to Gaara who started twitching. Then it dawned on him. "Oh Shit."

"Yah…Oh shit is right!" Kankuro said getting up. "Nee-chan…how bout we let Naruto take care of Gaara right now?" Temari looked at him.

"Sure!" She said walking out with him at a fast pace. "Good luck!" She said before slamming the door. Hammers and nail guns could be heard from outside. Naruto sweat dropped.

"It can't be that bad….can it?" Naruto said turning to Gaara whose eye was twitching and leg was twitching. "Maybe it is…Gaara?" Gaara turned his head abruptly staring him dead in the eye with a look of pure insanity. "…Shit!" Naruto ran for the door but was stopped by a wall of sand. "Now Gaara…let's uh be rational about this…"

"R-Rational…w-why d-do y-you say r-r-r-r-rational?" Gaara asked stuttering more that Hinata would. Gaara walked over to Naruto…well more like step twitch step twitch…but it could be considered walking. Then it happened. "Did you ever wonder why we have air? Why am I so hated? Is Kankuro as stupid as he looks? Why are you backing up Naruto? Can I have a hug? I like pie…do you like pie? Cake is good but I don't like it when Temari makes it…do you eat cake? Do you know how to dance? Can you make ramen? I want my teddy…do you have one? Naruto get back here…why are you trying to break down the door? Naruto…what's it like to fall in love? Kankuro gave me the talk but I didn't get it…could you explain it? Naruto the windows are locked get back here…why are you trying to cut your throat? Why is the sun so bright? Why is Sai gay? Is Sai gay? I want a girlfriend…do you have one? Where's my gourd? Would you like to dance? Can you teach me to dance? Naruto why are trying to hang yourself? Where is Temari and Kankuro? Did you ever ask Sakura out? Hinata? Should I ask out Matsuri? Is Jiriyia as perverted as he looks? Do you know who your dad is? How old is Kyuubi? Did you like Sasuke? Are you bi? Are you bored? Can I have more coffee? Naruto why are you forming more hand signs?"

5 long hours later

Sounds can be heard form outside as Kankuro and Temari decide to open the door. The remove the last nail and walk in. "Gaara?" Temari asks. She looks around and finds him hanging up side down on his couch zoned out. "Hi Gaara…feeling better?"

"What happened?" Gaara asked opening his eyes looking zoned out.

"You had coffee with expresso…" Kankuro said coming in.

"Oh…" Gaara looked guilty. He got up and walked over to his desk to look at papers.

"Ummm…where's Naruto-kun?" Temari said looking around for him. She walked behind the desk and found him. He was curled up in a ball under the desk.

"…questions…so…many questions…." Naruto said staying like that rocking back and forth. Kankuro felt bad for him and picked him up and took him out the room.

"You left him in here…with me…when I was like that?" Gaara said staring at his sister.

"Ummm yeah…." She said

"Why?"

"Cause it looked fun!" She said walking out leaving him to finish his work.

"Fun…hmmm…maybe I should have coffee more often." Gaara said to himself. He looked at the cup and picked it up. "There's still some left…" He got a devilish look in his eye. He took it with him and left the office. He walked home and found Naruto on his bed still in a ball. He whispered something in his ear that caused the blonde to perk up. He pulled out two cups full of coffee. They hid under Kankuro's bed, waited till he was asleep and drank the cups. Poor Kankuro.

END welll hope that was funny…review dattebayo!