The Jonah Returns
Midshipman Hollom jumps into the water, not to his death, but into the future. One shot, unless you like it.
AN: The song refered to in the end of this chapter is called Hymn to the sea and it is sung by Sissel. It's part of Titanic's soundtrack!
Chapter 1
He was so tired of all the whispering, of the crew talking on his back. He wanted to hide, to flee this prison his life had become. He longed for the sea, and to be a better man than he was, but everything seemed to go wrong anywhere he went.
They hated him. The lads sided with Nargle, their own, of course. And it was so difficult every moment he was forced to interact with others, except perhaps… Will Blakeney. The young Lord he had helped as he could, especially in the beginning, when so far away from home and land, homesickness would sometimes sadden him, had not turned his back on him.
Yet, said a malicious caustic little voice from the darkness. Give it time.
It didn't matter that he did all that he could. He lost Warley, he failed to Beat to Quarters that cursed foggy morning, and all could see that he could barely stand the sight of Nargle being flogged, his guilt consuming him. He felt so useless.
And so afraid. Gods, but he felt like a pariah, and like a scared little rabbit after passing by all of them below, the crew saluting him, their eyes serious, others mocking, others with a menacing glint, like a crowd of hungry dark tooth fairies ready to jump at you and bite the meat off your bones. Like the coward he was, he made the mistake of looking them in their eyes, showing his fear in such an obvious fashion and fled, feeling as if his stomach had dropped to his feet, and hiding, in panic, among the little midshipmen, all so much younger than him. And braver too.
Was there no hope? He felt like all had come to a stop. He wanted it to end. Why couldn't there be rain and wind? If only there was rain and wind and good tide… he would not feel so guilty! He suppressed a sob. What had he done to deserve to be shunned like a worthless leper and WHY did he feel so wretched and guilty?
It's all your fault. Was there nothing he could do?
You know what needs to be done.End this, all of it.
And then he knew.
He put on his uniform with measured movements and looked, for the last time, at his beloved Spanish guitar, given to him by an old lady, an acquaintance of his dearly yet deceased mother, a spinster whose last name was Moon. An odd name, that was for certain. Perhaps good, young Lord Blakeney would keep it, even though he could not play it, lacking his right arm. But surely he would have descendants, and maybe, just maybe, he could pass it on to his younglings, and something of Bradley Hollom would remain, and perhaps he would be remembered, if only as a distant memory.
How would he be remembered?
Wake up. Was that the wind whispering?, he thought, hoping. But no, his shoulders slumped, it was only a light, momentary breeze swiping the deck of the ship.
Will Blakeney was on watch. He didn't want him to be the last to see him, lest the young boy be traumatized. As he will be, if he won't hate you outright for taking the coward way out. But I'm also doing this for them… so maybe their luck will turn, he sighed, reaching for little boy, startling the young midshipman, who nearly jumped.
"You gave me quite the fright, Mr. Hollom!"
"I'm sorry,", he replied, smiling sadly. "I did not intend to."
Blakeney asks him something about the wind or was it the rain? Tomorrow? Yes, oh yes, he is quite certain it will come, the change for the better. His hat forgotten, holding a canon shot in his hands with some difficulty, he utters, softly, his final words.
"You have always been… very kind… to me." The boy smiles. "Goodbye Blakeney."
Feeling strangely calm, canon ball in a deathly grip, he jumps overboard, all of the world suspended in his flight between the wooden world, the air and the water, Blakeney's cry of help, his face and Lucky Jack Aubrey's looking at him from above as he sinks into the deep, his eyes open.
Forgive me, my friend. Forgive me, my God. Will you forgive me?
His descent, curious thing, into the ocean, seems never-ending, and surely he must have passed the veil, all the worries and anguish gone. A warm kind light surrounds him, a haunting song with no words comforts him, and then oblivion.
"No!", screams Will, his tears blinding him. "Bradley!"
"It's done, lad. He's gone, I can't see him anymore." the boy sniffs in my hands for a bit, and then we hear it.
"What is THAT?"
I'm an experienced seaman, and the dark plays many tricks on many a sailor's mind, especially if most, if not all, suspect or believe there is a Jonah aboard. But never have I heard a voice like that, in the middle of nothing. A woman's voice that sings no words, and with such enchanting beauty. She or it, whatever it may be, continues to sing for a few minutes more, and it seems as if all the souls in this vessel have come to see what is going on.
"Sir?", asks Peter Calamy. "What is this?"
It appears to come from the water, all around us. Then, an unearthly glow briefly surrounds the ship and after that, the voice quiets and the blessed, boring darkness returns.
Suddenly, it begins to rain.
Ok, this is, for now, a one-shot. If you'd care for it, I could make some more, just PM me or review. Thanks for reading!