Meteor Shower

A Beetlejuice fanfic interquel

by Lady Norbert

A/N: It seems that a few people were not best pleased with me that I ended The Bug Princess where I did, without showing the Outerworld wedding between BJ and Lydia. One of those people was Prince Vince. No, I'm not confusing reality with fantasy (this time); my Tumblr is actually followed by a blog called princevinceoftheneitherworld, and His Highness made it quite clear that he was not happy. He was there, of course, but he pleaded with me on behalf of the rest of my readers to show the wedding.

This being the case, you get the wedding - from Prince Vince's point of view, since he's so insistent. Seriously, you can go to his Tumblr and find the argument if you don't believe me. It was a little disconcerting.

Furthermore, I did say in the FAQ on that story that I don't trust my brain as far as I can throw it, and it's because I always end up writing more than I intend. So in addition to this little "interquel," expect two more sequels beyond Sleeping Beetle. I seem to have accidentally invented a mythology, and it's actually been surfacing throughout the first two stories - I just didn't know it at the time.

As you may have guessed, the titling scheme here comes from the song "Meteor Shower" by Owl City. It is, to my thinking, absolutely perfect for BJ and Lydia as I've written them (especially with this mythology in mind), so I've borrowed it here.

Part I: I Can Finally See That You're Right There Beside Me

The most interesting thing to Prince Vince, regarding the bond between his adopted sister and her husband, was how little they spoke of it.

There were no sonnets, no love songs, no speeches. Were he the one forever entwined with his soul mate, his prosings on the matter could (and almost certainly would) fill volumes. But for Beetlejuice and Lydia, there could hardly have been fewer words exchanged between them on the subject. Occasionally he would remark that he was her idiot, and she would agree, or she would make the assertion and he would concur. The prince could recognize the affection in the strange comment, but it never seemed to go any farther.

It was a puzzle to him, not least because he knew how they really felt. Anyone who spent perhaps five minutes in their presence would be able to figure out that these two loved each other, with a depth and a nigh purity that put some of the old fairy tales to shame. But to speak of it was, for Beetlejuice at least, almost anathema.

They were reunited now, of course, and thanks to Tumblr he was aware of the situation. But he was curious as to what exactly Beetlejuice was plotting; the chapters following Lydia's return to the Outerworld made it clear that he was up to something, but it was a mystery as to just what that was. As he finished reading another update, however, one of his pages told him that the very ghost in question had come to pay him a visit.

"Ah, send him in."

He smiled at Beetlejuice when the latter entered. "It's always good to see you, my friend. Congratulations on your victory over the Shadow Man."

"Well, the credit there goes more to Lyds than anybody - and some to you too, s'far as that goes. But thanks." He shuffled, a bit uncomfortably. "Got to talk to you about something."

"Of course. You seem troubled."

"No, not exactly. I mean - things are fine. Great, even. But I've got something in the works and I need some help."

Puzzled now, the prince dismissed his attendants, guessing that what Beetlejuice needed was privacy to speak openly. "Lydia is well, I trust?"

"Oh, sure. Actually, that's part of what I have to talk to you about." He looked... a little grumpy, for some reason. "See, here in the Neitherworld, we're married by contract - you know it, I know it, she knows it, everybody knows it. But out in the human world, they don't know it."

"Which is why you gave her the ring, I remember."

"Oh, yeah, you helped me pick it out, I almost forgot. So the thing is, her mom's kinda nuts and is trying to plan the wedding behind our backs, practically. And Lyds is ready to go spare over it. I came up with a better plan - talked it over with her dad, got him on board, everything is set up." He smirked a little. "Still have to tell her about it, but otherwise, we're good to go on July 6th."

"I'm pleased to hear it." Prince Vince was even more puzzled now. "So what is it you need from me?"

"Chuckie - that's her dad - says I have to have a best man stand up with me, to make sure I don't run away or something goofy like that. Like I'm gonna run. I guess it's tradition though, and so..."

He blinked. "You want me to be the best man?"

Beetlejuice's expression turned serious. "Look, I'm not a fan of sayin' stuff like this, but let's be real. You were there for her when I was stuck in the Outerworld. You kept her safe, tried to make her happy, all that stuff. You are the best man. Know what I mean?"

"I'm honored. I am truly honored."

"'Course, if I'm inviting her brother, I guess I have to invite mine too," he added, grumbling again. "We need somebody to hold the camera, anyway, she'll be too busy."

"That seems perfectly reasonable. But we'll need to arrange the passage to the Outerworld," the prince mused. "Perhaps I should speak with the Fairy Godfather; this does seem to be his area of expertise, after all."

"I'll let you handle it," Beetlejuice said wryly. "Pretty sure I'm clean out of favors with him."

Donny responded to the royal summons with all his usual punctuality, and was predictably delighted by the invitation. Beetlejuice had found a convenient excuse to get back to the Outerworld before his brother arrived, which Prince Vince suspected had less to do with his needing to be there and more to do with him wanting to be well out of reach of any joyful hugs.

"I can hardly believe this! Me, going to the Outerworld to see my brother get married! And hey, I just realized - Lydia's your sister now, so your sister is married to my brother and that almost makes us family, Prince Vince!" He beamed. "Oh, this is going to be so exciting! What am I going to wear?"

"I expect we'll let the Fairy Godfather decide on our appearances," said the prince, amused. "He did well enough by Beetlejuice when he crafted the 'BJ' persona; I'm sure he'll select something suitable for us as well."

"Oh, right, we can't be all purple and green in front of Lydia's parents! I didn't think about that. Oh, Mother and Dad will be so disappointed that they couldn't go, but I understand - we have to keep it small. I'm sure they will too." Donny seemed like he hardly knew what to do with himself, pacing up and down and all but fluttering with anticipation.

"Do your parents know about his, er, double life - so to speak?" Prince Vince asked. It had never occurred to him to wonder until now. "That he changes form to be with Lydia in the Outerworld, and so forth?"

"Oh, sure. I mean, they watched the whole after-prom debacle on television, just like everybody else," Donny reminded him. "It wasn't too hard for them to understand the rest, even if it's a bit weird to them. They both really like Lydia; Dad says she's the smartest decision Beetlejuice ever made." He chuckled.

"Actually, Donny, that brings me to another question, if you don't mind," he said. "Your parents' names are Gnat and Bee, your brother is Beetle..."

"And I don't quite fit the pattern, is that it?" Donny smiled. "Well, Donny's not my real name. It's actually Dobsonfly. But that's a bit of a mouthful for a little kid, so Beetlejuice started calling me Donny when we were young and it stuck."

"Speaking of Beetlejuice, I've often wondered - why is your brother always called by his full name, as if it's one word?"

"Truthfully, your guess is as good as mine," Donny admitted. "Our parents call him Junior - he was named after our grandfather Beetle, who was our mother's father. I suppose people started calling him Beetle Juice to differentiate between the two, and over time it sort of turned into one word. He can't say his own name, on account of his curse, so it's not as though he could correct anyone."

"What curse is he under?"

"Another good question I can't rightly answer. Apparently the terms of the curse prevent him from explaining it to anyone. Something happened to him a long time ago..." Donny shook his head. "I wish I understood it better, maybe I could find a way to help him break it."

"I wonder if the Fairy Godfather would know."

"We could ask. No harm in asking, I always say!"

Part II: I Am Not My Own, For I Have Been Made New

"To what do I owe the honor of a royal visit, Your Highness?" The Fairy Godfather seemed like he was in a good mood, and Prince Vince hoped that boded well.

"It's always a pleasure to see you, sir. I was hoping you might be able to assist us" - he gestured to Donny - "with a situation."

"Please, sit." He gestured to the chairs opposite himself. "Now, as I understand it, there's to be a wedding in the Outerworld of those who are already joined by contract here in the Neitherworld."

The prince and Donny exchanged surprised looks. "You're very well informed, Godfather."

"Your Highness is not the only one who knows how to use the internet," he pointed out. All politeness he was.

"Ah. Of course."

"However, the details of your particular request are yet unknown to me. How may I help?"

"Well, sir, Beetlejuice has requested that I stand as his best man in the ceremony, and would like his brother on hand for the proceedings as well."

"So you were hoping I might be able to arrange a pair of disguises, is that it?"

"That, and the passage to the Outerworld itself."

"Oh, you have no need of my assistance for that," said the Godfather. "Beetlejuice's own power is sufficient to bring you there and back - all you'll need to do is have him take you with him. It's a simple enough matter. As for your appearance, I believe I have shoes that will provide sufficient cloaking of your true forms."

"Like the ones you loaned to Beetlejuice?" Donny ventured to speak for the first time.

"Precisely."

"And the terms of the contract?" inquired the prince.

"No contract necessary. I will do this out of the goodness of my heart," the Godfather replied. "It is a rare gesture I make, but in light of the circumstances, it seems like the least I can do. This wedding must take place, and it is of critical importance that the ceremony has sufficient witnesses from the Neitherworld."

Vince and Donny exchanged another look. "And... why might that be, sir?"

"I do not expect you to fully understand as yet. Forces are at work here, forces far beyond your comprehension or mine. But make no mistake, the union of Beetlejuice and Lydia - on both sides of what some mortals call the Veil - is a necessary undertaking." He leaned back in his chair and studied them thoughtfully. "To put it in simplest terms, it has been foretold."

"By... whom? When?"

"These are questions for another time. All that matters for the present is that you are there to witness the marriage. The contract has already secured their bond in the Neitherworld; it will fall to the two of you to ensure that all goes well and nothing impedes the Outerworld ceremony."

"I shouldn't think that's likely," said Prince Vince, thoughtfully. "Beetlejuice said it's to be a very small affair - Lydia's parents and a few other relations, two of her old school friends, and the two of us, plus the officiant."

"Good. The fewer individuals who know of the wedding, the less probable it is that anything will go wrong."

"I don't understand," said Donny. "Why would anyone want to stop Beetlejuice's wedding?"

"Perhaps no one would. It may be that the knowledge of which I speak is closely guarded enough that no danger exists. But it is a chance which we cannot afford to take." The Godfather shook his head. "Ask me no more. I am not at liberty to speak of this just now."

"Well," Donny ventured after a moment, "I do have a different question, if you don't mind, sir."

"You may ask. I cannot promise I will be able to answer."

"My brother's been under a curse for as long as I can remember. He can't speak his own name, or even tell anyone the nature of the curse itself. Is there some way to free him from it? Some way I can help him, maybe?"

The Fairy Godfather made no reply at first, only lifted his eyebrows. Prince Vince watched him curiously. Something about his expression made the prince think there was a vast deal more at stake than a simple wedding, but he wasn't sure what else could be.

"Your brother is not cursed," he said finally. "Not the way you or he might think, that is. He was cursed a long time ago, before his very existence, to be that which he became until he found the countermeasure which could help him be more than what he was."

Donny opened his mouth, then closed it again, wearing a perplexed expression which strongly reminded the prince of Beetlejuice. "I'm afraid I don't understand."

"It is a curious situation, that of your brother. The actual nature of his curse is a very simple one," the Godfather explained. "There is no harm, I think, in telling you this. Being a poltergeist, Beetlejuice is by nature a creature of emotion. Simply put, the more he feels, the less he articulates. He longed for centuries to speak his own name, and for that very reason, he could not do it. A name has power, you must understand, and to give someone your true name is to give them a certain amount of power over you. In Beetlejuice's case, this is literally true, since the speaking of his name summons or banishes him, and so this spell was placed upon him to prevent him from giving that power to the wrong individual."

"But everyone in the Neitherworld knows his name!"

"In the Neitherworld, yes. The Neitherworld was not the potential source of danger. It was the mortal world, the Outerworld, which could not know his name."

Donny scratched his head, apparently absorbing all of this. "I presume," said Prince Vince, "that if there was a chance of him giving the power to the wrong individual, there must also be a right one?"

"You see things clearly, Your Highness. The right one was, of course, Lydia. As there was no way to know when she would appear, it was necessary to keep Beetlejuice tongue-tied indefinitely."

"But why -"

"No more, please, I beg you. The details will explain themselves when the time is right," said the Godfather. "As it is, you know more than either Beetlejuice or Lydia themselves do about the situation. Be content with that. Fredo," he called, "bring me shoes for the prince and his guest. And indulge me," he added, glancing at them. "Make sure I get a picture."

"I'll bring a slice of the cake if I can," Prince Vince promised, vaguely amused despite his confusion.

"Much appreciated."

"I'm more perplexed about Beetlejuice's curse now than I was when we got here," Donny admitted as they were leaving.

"I quite understand. I begin to suspect we are not dealing with the usual sort of magic," the prince mused. "There is something much stronger at work here, something very old and very mysterious. I expect we'll know sooner or later what he means, but for now, I suppose we just have to be patient."

"And we have a wedding to attend."

"Indeed! Let's head back to the castle. Beetlejuice will make an appearance when the time is right."

Part III: Please Don't Let Me Go, I Desperately Need You

As Prince Vince expected, Beetlejuice arrived on the morning of his Outerworld wedding looking remarkably as he had done when he first donned his "BJ" persona for Lydia's high school dance. "Pretty much just waiting on you two at this point," he said. "Lyds is in the house with her friends getting dolled up, and her relatives are waiting with the judge."

"I'm so excited! Brother, thank you so much for including me in this, it means so much to me that you want me there!" Donny was almost beside himself with joy.

"Yeah, yeah." The groom looked more amused than anything. "Just don't say anything weird to anybody, okay? Nobody there knows we're dead, or that Lyds is a part-time princess, or any of that stuff. And call me BJ."

"And what will you need me to do, Beetlejuice?" the prince inquired. "I've never served as a best man before, I'm uncertain as to my duties."

"Mostly just stand next to me and make sure I don't run screaming into the trees."

"That's very likely, is it?"

Beetlejuice snorted. "Oh yeah. Totally what I had planned."

They reached the little house which Beetlejuice had purchased for his bride's birthday, and followed him through the copse of trees to the clearing where the wedding was to take place. "This is a splendid piece of property, Bee- er, BJ," the prince commented. "Lydia must have been thrilled with the gift."

"Thought she was gonna cry, honestly. Glad she didn't, I never know what to do with it when she cries. Okay, so - Mr. and Mrs. Deetz, this is my brother Donny and my best man Vincent. Guys, these are Lydia's parents."

"I didn't know you had a brother, BJ! Oh, it's so nice to meet you both," gushed Lydia's mother. Her father rolled his eyes faintly, though he smiled.

While Donny conversed amiably with Mrs. Deetz, Mr. Deetz beckoned to "BJ" and they stepped away from her; the prince, curious, followed. "Listen, BJ," he said, "I know I'm supposed to give Lydia away and everything. But - well, you know how Delia can be. You had to set all this up just so she wouldn't do anything you didn't like. Honestly, I'm half afraid she'll take it into her head to slip away from the reception at some point to start redecorating your living room or something."

"Uh... yeah. I don't think Lyds would appreciate that."

"No, neither do I. So I know it's not typical, but maybe you'd better walk Lydia out here yourself. I kind of want to keep an eye on Delia as much as possible."

"No problem, Mr. D. I think Lyds will understand."

Mr. Deetz smiled, and shook BJ by the hand. "Just keep making my daughter happy. Okay?"

"I'll try." BJ seemed like he wanted to say something else, but couldn't quite formulate the words. And suddenly, Vince was reminded of what the Fairy Godfather had said - the more he feels, the less he articulates.

He finally understood, now, why they spoke so little of their obvious attachment. It was like in one of Jane Austen's novels, when Mr. Knightley spoke to Emma about the matter. "If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more." A hundred poems buzzed about in his head, trying to express Beetlejuice's sentiments for him, but they would have to wait until he was at liberty to write. (Tumblr would be ecstatic.) For now, he had a wedding to witness.

While Mr. Deetz turned his attention to getting the guests to sit down, BJ started walking toward the house. After a moment's hesitation, the prince followed him.

"BJ, a word?"

"Huh?"

Well away from everyone else, Vince put a hand on the groom's shoulder. "A word of advice, my friend? Tell the lady you love her."

"...what?"

"I mean, in those words."

"Why?"

"I just think it will mean a lot to her. That's all." He smiled. "Go on, retrieve my sister."

BJ shook his head, smiling slightly, and socked the prince gently on the arm. "Right. You're weird, but I like that in a guy. Be back soon."

Vince was standing at the little altar beside the officiant several minutes later when some music started playing. "Where's that coming from?" he heard one of Lydia's uncles ask.

"I believe BJ set up something in the trees," said Donny, catching on. "Here they come!" He had Lydia's camera in his hands, and was definitely getting into his role as wedding photographer.

They emerged from the copse then, and paused at the threshold of the little clearing. The prince couldn't help but smile. Lydia wasn't wearing her tiara, which he understood, but her hair was pulled up into something similar, with the veil cascading around her shoulders. She was a fairy tale princess in her soft white gown, ornamented with black embroidery and red satin. Her smile was gentle, slightly nervous; BJ's, by contrast, was almost goofy from how proud it was. He walked her past her admiring relatives to where the judge stood, and she handed her bouquet to one of the young ladies seated nearby.

They faced one another, and in truth, Vince found himself regretting that his place was at BJ's side rather than Lydia's. He could see her face clearly enough - pale and yet flushed, radiant with joy, her dark eyes shining - but BJ's expression was not his to experience. Fortunately, Donny was taking his duties seriously, and he knew there would be pictures enough later.

Had it been his wedding, he thought, he would have penned elaborate vows for himself and his bride. BJ, however, would have choked on the words, unable to speak them. As it was, they kept their promises very simple, and he seemed to have enough difficulty saying "I do." Lydia's engagement ring doubled as her token of marriage; for BJ there was a silver band with some decorative engraving.

When the judge inquired whether anyone objected to the proceedings, Vince felt himself taking a sharp breath. The Fairy Godfather had been afraid of this happening. But who present would question it? Surely they could all see, as clearly as he himself did, that this union was too perfectly arranged. They were the Neitherworld's collective "OTP," as someone on Tumblr might call it, and being in the Outerworld didn't change that for an instant.

And then it was over, and the whole thing was sealed with a kiss almost before the judge could finish saying "You may kiss the bride." The music changed, as if by magic (imagine that), into something more triumphant, and once Lydia had collected her flowers again, they led everyone out of the clearing and back to the house, where the lawn was laid out with food and drink and chairs and room to dance.

It was just as well that Beetlejuice had found a place so far removed from most society, Vince thought, because the party went on well past sundown. He suddenly heard Donny say, "Oh, would you look at that? A shooting star! Make a wish!"

Vince glanced over at BJ, who had an arm around Lydia's shoulders and was speaking quietly in her ear. What he said, the prince didn't know, but he could see BJ gesturing subtly with his other hand. Suddenly, the night sky came alive with multiple shooting stars, backlit just faintly by the rising moon. Everyone paused in their celebrations to gaze in awe at the brief meteor shower, and the prince took the opportunity to sidle up behind the newlyweds.

"That's a bit showy, don't you think?" Lydia said teasingly.

"Whaaat?" He smiled. "Hey, like Donny said, make a wish."

"I already did," she said, "a long time ago. I wished that when I moved to Peaceful Pines, I would find a friend."

"Ah, Babes... you ain't seen nothin' yet."

"So all went according to plan, did it?"

The Fairy Godfather was entirely satisfied - with the return of the shoes, with the slice of cake, and with the spread of photos he was admiring on his desktop.

"As far as I'm aware, the only hitch was Donny catching the bouquet instead of one of Lydia's friends." The prince pointed at one of the photos. "Otherwise, everything went extremely well."

"They are joined in both worlds. Good."

"I think if you found another plane of existence where they could get married, they probably would," he admitted, chuckling.

"It doesn't look as though Lydia puts much stock in some of those wedding customs," the Godfather noted, picking up a photo of her alone. "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue?"

"Well, the dress was new, and she told me later that her shoes were blue for that exact reason," the prince said. Laughing, he added, "She said that Beetlejuice decided he was her something old."

"And borrowed?"

"You can't tell in the photo, but there is actually a very small library book hidden in her bouquet. Some little herb manual she borrowed to try to identify some of the plants on their property."

"A library book and a poltergeist. She's well suited to him, all right." The Godfather shook his head and finished his cake. "So what will they do now?"

"For the time being, I think they're just nesting. He's setting up shop as an exterminator, and she's working on her photography portfolio. But they'll be here fairly often too."

"Good. Keep an eye on things, Your Highness, and if anything strange or unexpected crops up... well, just make sure I'm informed."

"Do you think that's probable?"

"My prince, consider who we're discussing. I would say it is inevitable."

~Fin~