IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT!! there was a mountain on the mountain there was a temple in the temple there was a monk and the monk's like " I wanna tell a story!" So there was a mountain on the mountian was a temple on the temple there was a mo- ITAI!
Get on with the story or I'll Hit you even harder!!
Fine you grumpy old fur-ball!
"Bold means Kyuubi, demon talk or Inner Self which multiple people will have"
"this means demon thoughts"
"Normal talk"
"Normal thoughts"
"I'm soooooooo hungry. Maybe I can try and steal one the mean guy's bread sticks." Thought a little 4 year old boy
Sneaking up to his dinner, he quickly snatched the bread and rsn down the alley way he called home.
"What the? Hey! Get back here you little demon! Help! The demon stole one of my bread sticks!" a plump man shouted waving a rolling pin in the air.
"Come on guys! I feel like having a fun time beating up our little demon!" a man yelled to his friends. Then more people started to join the chase as Naruto had already eaten the bread long ago. The chase went on for what seemed hours until Naruto took a wrong turn into an alley we had never been in before
As the small mop of bloody, blonde hair ran down a dark alley, thoughts were racing though his head:
"Why do they hate me? What have I ever done to them? I know I stole bread but I was hungry"
"Come back here you demon!! We aren't finished with you yet!" one of the angry villages yelled in rage, throwing a sharp pointy object at the boy proclaimed as a demon.
As they were doing this Kyuubi was watching from his cage.
"Kit!"
"W-Who's t-there?" Naruto replied fearing it might be another hidden enraged villager.
"Down here! In your gut!"
Naruto quickly whipped his head to face his gut, making his neck crack in the process.
"Ow!" Naruto said as he felt more kunai bury themselves in his flesh. Naruto fell to the ground with a thud when a kunai hit his right knee.
"Heh heh heh heh, look what we have here, a little demon trying to live in our village. What do you guys say we teach this trash a lesson?" A man said with a sinister grin on his face getting shouts of agreement from the ever growing crowd.
The 4-year old boy knew this was the end. He had a talking stomach – "Hey! I resent that!" –a group of over 50 people ready to kill him, and he was already severely dehydrated and starved.
"Kit! Get out of there now or you're gonna die and I don't want to die now either!"
"Don't you think I know that already?"
"Whatever, just calm down and I'll handle the rest"
Naruto shifted his weight to the uninjured limb and started gathering demonic chakra while making blurred hand-seals.
"Kitsune teleportation no jutsu!" I know it's very lame
The red chakra quickly turning to black as Naruto/Kyuubi seemed to dissolve into the shadows of the alley way.
The villagers attempted to keep their little punching bag within their grasp but failed pathetically.
Hokage's Office
The Hokage was just sitting there filling out yet another boring piece of paperwork wishing something exciting would happen, which soon did when a stack of new paperwork got engulfed with purple and black flames.
" Ojiji, we need to talk." a voice within the flames said.
The Hokage didn't know whether to thank whoever it was for destroying his worst enemy or get ready to battle this god sent man.
" Aww. Man, don't give me that face; I need to ask you for a favor." Naruto whined at the confused face of his "Grandfather".
"Naruto?" the old man asked, wondering how the boy got here with such a flashy entrance.
"Damn, I need to get him to teach me that someday, it'll scare the shit out of the assholes of council I have and get them in line," he thought to himself mentally picturing an image of the council members actually scared of him in a good way.
"Ah, Sarutobi, good friend of Minato, my brother from another mother!" Kyuubi spoke though Naruto's body gave him a thumbs-up.
The Hokage just stood there not knowing how to react to the insult/compliment from Kyuubi/Naruto.
"Don't know how to react, old man? Then I'll start first. Hi! I'm the most recent Kyuubi no Kitsune, though my real name is Hikira. Kyuubi is more of a title such as king or emperor. The reason I attacked is because I was doing a job assigned to me by Kami and the Shinigami themselves. The mission was to kill a man by the name of Orochimaru who had been killing innocent souls with his sick experiments making both gods really pissed off now. Now they had to take another soul which was Minato, my best friend, because I didn't recognize him by your village's stuck up bitches I think called Uchihas with their devil cursed Sharingan."
Here Kyuubi allowed some time for the man to soak up the new info and to take a deep breath before continuing.
"Then, I got sealed up by him into his son knowing that he could trust both of us not to destroy the village. I have seen a lot of bad treatment in my life but not to this degree. This boy named Naruto has been treated lower than flies and even dung. As I think, people should look at it like this: you shouldn't hate and try to destroy the prison that keeps the prisoner for there is a chance that he can escape. And now here we are, having this very talk.
Oh and by the way, this has been the 783rd attempt on this boy's since he was born. I'm surprised he hasn't gone insane or tried suicide yet."
Kyuubi finally concluded after having to sit down since the boy's body wasn't accustomed to be talking for such a long time without stopping.
Blink, blink, blink "SAY WHAT!!" Sarutobi exclaimed, his brain finally finished processing the information just given.
"You just came in here, burst a pile of paperwork right in front of me, which I thank you greatly for (Kyuubi/Naruto sweat dropped). Then tell me that you were like a brother to Minato! And now you claim that the great Kyuubi no Kitsune's name is Hikira!" Sarutobi finished, still panting and gasping for air after his ranting.
"Okay, now we got that done, I need to ask you if I can take the boy outside the village to train him for say 7 years, and know that no hunter ninjas are gonna be after us. If that is all, ja ne! Oh, and by the way, Minato told me to tell you to use Kage Bunshin no Jutsu for the damned paperwork." Kyuubi/Naruto said smirking at the confused look on the Hokage's face before teleporting out of the village, destroying yet another huge stack of paper with flames.
"Damn gotta love that guy." Sarutobi thought solemnly before finally realizing that he was doing paperwork the wrong way. Taking out a slip of paper that said "Bang Head here, old man", he placed it on the desk and did what the paper said.
Lupo: Whew! My first fanfic! I really made this one like a month ago but was too lazy to type it up. You see, I have a bunch of fanfics in my head that are either in progess or finished. Please review, it maybe lame but I need to know why!
"Damn straight it is! I mean " Kitsune teleportation no jutsu!" Come on! My grandma can think of something better"
Lupo: "Oh shut up you old fur ball, besides she's a master at jutsus while I'm just in 7th Grade!!"
"Damn, you're in 7th! You shouldn't even be on this website!"
Lupo: "Hey! I resent that! And besides, who's in control of the fanfic?"
"Whatever. Hey, any pairings?"
Lupo: "Nope, I suck at writing lovey dovey stuff. But I just have to put this one in."
Naruto/Temari
"Hmmmmm, good choice, at least it's not that pink banshee bitch."
Lupo: "Thank you. Oh! And there's going to be Sasuke and Sakura Bashing!!"
"YES! YES! YES! Hah! I win the bet, take that One Tail!!"
Lupo: sweatdrop "Anyways please review!"
And now for Character interview
Lupo: Hello everyone and thank you for reading character interview. I'm your host , Lupo or Lupo-sama if you wish. Today we will be interviewing a fox, kyuu-
"Oh! That's me!! Hiiiiiii everyoneeeeeeee!!"
"um…. You had chocolate before the show didn't you?'
"oooo! Chocolate! Where where! I loooooove chocolate!"
"Janitor! Can you please clean up the mess behind stage of chocolate wrappers I'm most certain are there. Okay then, let's start our first part, Burning questions!
Q: so Kyuubi, are you going to train Naruto's ass off more than Gai trains lee
A: Oh dear no! I'm noting going to do that!! I'm going to train Naruto ten times harder than them!
Q: Dear Kyuubi ,What do you like to do in your spare time?
A: Hmmm… well I eat, play with other foxes, and make bets with one tail over there. Hey! One tail! You still owe my 10,000 stars for the one with Naurto/Temari!
Shit! He still remembers! I gotta get outta here!
Qcough okay last one, where are you going to take Naruto on your trips outside the village?
A: Oh I'm not going to tell you! That would be a spoiler!
Lupo : And that ends today's episode of character interview! Please E-mail me characters you want interviewed and questions you want answered!
Munch munch munch! And don't forget to bring chocolate!!
Lupo: Someone restrain him, he's gonna go full hyper!!And please don't flame, we want to keep Gai and Lee as sane as possible. More flames conjure up their flames of youth!
Gai: Ah Lee did you hear that!! We must run 10,000 laps around Konoha!
Lupo: What the Fuck! How the hell did you get here! Security!