The Great Hunt
"Mr. Trumble?" Heyes strode forward and held out his hand. "Colonel Harper sent us, said you needed some men familiar with the area and able to help you on your hunting expedition."
"Ah, yes. Colonel Harper recommended you two highly. You know the terms of course?" The gentleman, clearly not from the west, was well dressed but in practical clothes that would do for the trail. He also spoke with a distinct accent.
"What are you huntin'?" the Kid asked, shaking his hand in turn.
"Well, as to that…" Trumble hemmed and hawed a bit. "As I said, the terms are ten dollars a day for each of you and a fifty dollar bonus if we succeed in the hunt."
"That's very generous pay, Mr. Trumble," Heyes responded. "Now, what exactly are we hunting that would justify such pay?"
"Please, it's just Trumble. Really, I am a hired guide as are the two of you, although I have guided our employers before. You must understand that they are eccentrics, and I have found that it often works better to humor them."
"To take their money, you mean," Heyes said shrewdly.
"Ah. Well. Yes. But if I didn't someone else would, and they can well afford it. Anyway will you take the job? I'd prefer it if our employers explained the quarry of this hunt."
Heyes and the Kid communed silently. The money was too good to turn down, and they wouldn't want to disappoint Colonel Harper, but Trumble was strangely reticent to tell them what was being hunted, and that didn't sit well.
"We're not bounty huntin' are we?" the Kid asked.
"No, no, I assure you the quarry is not human. Quite a small animal actually, and not at all dangerous, I assure you."
Heyes and the Kid communed silently once more before Heyes turned to Trumble. "Alright, we'll be here in the morning."
~~~oOo~~~
Heyes and the Kid entered the lobby to find Trumble standing with two elegantly dressed men.
"Ah, hello, right on time. Let me introduce you all. Joshua Smith, Thaddeu Jones are our new guides; they come highly recommended as trackers and hunters. Please meet Mr. E.G. Gusthwite and the Honorable Hobart Humperdink."
Heyes and Curry blinked slightly, but nodded their heads in greetings.
"Call me HH, please," Humperdink responded, shaking hands. "My name's a mouthful, but not too bad; old Eggy here is Englebert Gillian Gusthwaite."
"HH is right. I suppose if we will be on the – trail – isn't that what you chaps call it? Anyway, if we are to be on the trail together, we should start on a friendly basis. You Yanks are so open about that sort of thing, aren't you? I'm generally called Egg or Eggy, and you met Percy last night. What shall we call you?"
"I'm Joshua and he's Thaddeus," Heyes replied. "Now, tell was what we are hunting so we know the best direction to head."
"Oh, it's quite exciting really." Eggy smiled broadly and bounced on his toes as he spoke. "Why we believe that we have found the home of the most exotic fauna on earth. We are hoping to catch the elusive…"
HH interrupted him. "Really, Eggy, not around so many people." He glanced around pointedly. "I think we should wait until we are out of town to tell them. After all, we don't want anyone else to pick up the scent from us."
Eggy's face fell and he glanced around furtively. "True, true. Let's head out west of town, and then we'll explain," was his mysterious response.
The Kid rolled his eyes at Heyes, but they were getting well paid after all. "Do you have rifles or shotguns, other gear?"
Percy Trumble spoke, "Yes, gentlemen, we've taken care of all the necessary equipment and provisions, so let's mount up and head on out."
~~~oOo~~~
After riding for an hour or so, Heyes led them to a stand of trees and stopped to rest the horses.
"Alright," Heyes announced. "We are going no further until you tell us what we're hunting. We cannot do the job you hired us for if we don't know what you want to hunt."
HH and Eggy glanced at each other. Trumble looked off, distancing himself from the discussion.
After a long silence, Eggy spoke, "We've spent years studying its habits and learning all we can about this rare creature. We, gentlemen, are seeking the rare Lepus Pasqua. As you know, unlike its more pedestrian cousins, they make nests in the grass and lay eggs. We hope to capture one alive, and perhaps a nest filled with eggs, to prove to the world the Lepus Pasqua is not a creature of fantasy."
HH spoke as Eggy fell silent. "People are skeptical of something they have never seen. Now, we know the Lepus Pasqua exists, and we intend to prove it to the world. We have spent years studying them and are convinced they reside in this area. It's mating season, so we hope to be able to find them as they begin their annual nesting."
"And a Lepus Pasqua is what exactly?"
Trumble turned around. "A rabbit." He grimaced and walked a distance away, whistling to himself before turning to watch the others.
"So we're hunting rabbits?"
"Yes."
"You think there's a rabbit that lays eggs?" Heyes and the Kid looked at each other incredulously.
"Well, there have been stories of this rabbit for many years. In the spring, many celebrate the arrival by sharing the rabbits' eggs and other festivities," Eggy responded. "We have studied folk traditions for many years and have found that most have a basis in fact. We are convinced that this rabbit exists, and our studies have indicated that it is a native of these parts."
"We're huntin' the Easter bunny?" The Kid hooted.
Heyes and Curry turned to Trumble, who shrugged sympathetically at their expressions and nodded.
"Yes," he replied. "HH and Eggy here are quite insistent that this rabbit really exists and are willing to pay well for the privilege of finding one to bring back to England to prove it."
"Ten dollars a day for each of us," Heyes confirmed.
HH spoke forcefully, "Yes, and of course a fifty dollar bonus for each of you if we are able to capture an adult rabbit and its nest. We don't require you to believe."
"Uh, huh," the Kid grunted. "And just how long are you willin' to hunt the bunny?"
"Oh, no more than a few weeks, I'm afraid. We have commitments back in London. I do so hope that we can find our quarry in that time. I will be so disappointed if we fail again."
Heyes and Curry looked at each other and at Trumble but made no move to remount their horses.
"We do realize that to you our quest may sound absurd, but I assure you we are quite serious."
Silence.
Finally, Heyes spoke, "Alright, far be it from us to refuse to assist in a scientific expedition, but we want the first five day's pay in advance."
Curry's eyes had widened at Heyes' choice of words, but he backed his partner as always.
HH and Eggy exchanged relieved smiles and quickly counted out one hundred dollars, which Heyes and the Kid even more quickly pocketed.
~~~oOo~~~
Several days later…
Heyes and Curry had dismounted to look for tracks.
"This is ridiculous, you know that, don't you?" Curry asked his friend. "Who looks for rabbit tracks, especially Easter Bunny tracks?"
"You know, despite their eccentricities, as Trumble calls it, HH and Eggy seem like nice enough men."
"Yeah, almost seems wrong to take their money."
"Where are these scruples coming from? They know we don't believe in this hunt, so why shouldn't we take the money? It's like that hunt I did for those seven-foot, redheaded Indians. This time though, I made sure we got paid some in advance. But there's no way we're getting that bonus, Kid."
"I guess. After all, Trumble don't seem to worry about the money, and they sure seem able to afford it."
Heyes looked at the Kid for a moment then grinned. "The names sure are mouthfuls aren't they? Percival, Englebert Gillian, and Hobart? Don't hear those often. No wonder none of them go by their full names."
"True, seems like I know someone else who won't use his first name," the Kid replied. "Although, I gotta say, after hearing the names in this crowd, yours doesn't seem so bad."
Heyes rolled his eyes and shook his head at the smirk the Kid gave him. "Let's find us some bunny tracks."
~~~oOo~~~
Several more days later…
"If I hav'ta go 'What about that one?' one more time when I see a rabbit, I may shoot someone."
"Relax, we're eating well; we're making money."
"Yeah, and I haven't seen a bed in two weeks. I have money to spend and I'm out here huntin' the Easter Bunny, and I can't even shoot it if I find it," the Kid complained.
Trumble walked over to the two of them. "Yes, well HH and Eggy are beginning to worry that they will have to leave without their blamed Lepus Pasqua. They're beginning to think I'm bad luck. I need your help. Guiding these two is the best job I've ever had, I don't intend to lose it out here over a rabbit."
"What do you have in mind?" Heyes asked cautiously. He and the Kid looked at each other. They had grown to like and respect Trumble over the past two weeks, recognizing a kindred spirit in his willingness to skirt the edge of the law, while exhibiting a basic goodness.
"I just need you two to find me a dead rabbit – don't shoot it though. And if it's white, that would be helpful. Then just play along."
"Dead rabbits aren't just lyin' around waitin' to be found, you know."
Heyes rolled his eyes. "I think we could arrange a dead rabbit that didn't indicate how it died."
"Good. Give me a two-hour heads-up before you bring it to HH and Eggy to identify if it's their rabbit. Also, I need to be present when you bring it to them."
"Tomorrow then."
They shook hands.
~~~oOo~~~
The next day as Trumble, HH, and Eggy were settling down to late afternoon tea, Heyes and the Kid came riding up with a dead white rabbit.
"We found this back over by that hill over there. The one we hadn't searched yet. I have to tell you, it's pretty unusual to find a dead animal, rabbit or not, just lying around, and this one doesn't look like the other rabbits in the area. I've never seen a white rabbit in the wild before." Heyes announced.
HH and Eggy crowded around. "Do you think? How dreadful if our poor Lepus is dead."
Trumble jumped in. "Why don't you show us where you found it, and we can examine the area."
They all rode quickly to the spot. Trumble dismounted and the five spread out to explore the hillside. After about fifteen minutes, Trumble shouted, "Look, I found a nest, and there are eggs in it!"
HH and Eggy ran to his side. They exclaimed over the rosy eggs lying nestled in the grass. HH and Eggy carefully picked one up examining it closely.
"Oh, good job, Percy. Look, Eggy, the nest has eggs and their color is likely. Maybe we can save the eggs," HH exclaimed.
He and Eggy went into a huddle then hustled back to the campsite, returning with a bag and cotton wool. After carefully wrapping each egg in the cotton wool, they placed them in the bag.
"Tomorrow we'll head back and try to incubate the eggs."
Heyes and the Kid exchanged raised eyebrows and turned questioningly to Trumble, who shrugged and grinned sheepishly, before joining HH and Eggy in discussing their plans for bringing the eggs safely back to London.
~~~oOo~~~
That evening, after the Kid had bagged two prairie hens, they feasted.
"You are quite wonderful with that weapon, Thaddeus," HH said wistfully, pouring more of the whiskey they were drinking as they ate. "I doubt I could ever shoot that well."
"Out here it's useful to be good with a gun if you're goin' to carry one," the Kid replied.
"I do wish you'd tell us about the fauna you've seen in your travels, even if you won't admit that you've seen a Lepus Pasqua before," Eggy invited.
"Fauna?" the Kid asked, sipping the whiskey appreciatively.
"Animals, I mean."
"Well…" Heyes took another sip of whiskey and stretched out before the fire, making himself more comfortable. "We've seen all kinds of animals, it's true. We've hunted and been hunted by some of the most dangerous of them all – mountain lions, grizzly bears, wolves. Yes, we've seen them all. Or so we thought, but we've never seen your rabbits – the Lepus Pasqua before that we know of." He took another sip and spoke meditatively, "I did catch sight of the jackalope a time or two."
The Kid snorted quietly into his whiskey.
"Jackalope? What's that?" Eggy asked eagerly.
"You've seen the jack rabbits in the distance, haven't you, and seen how big they get?" Heyes continued, drawing his listeners in. "Well, they can get big, bigger than you can imagine. But the Jackalope is bigger than the biggest jack rabbits. Some say Jakalopes came about when the biggest jack rabbits bred with antelopes. I don't know if that's true or not, but they're called Jackalopes because their horns remind you of an antelope's antlers. Yes, indeed, the Jackalope is a rare sight around here, but it's considered lucky to see one."
Trumble looked skeptical but kept silent. HH and Eggy drew in deep breaths. "Maybe, once we prove the existence of the Lepus Pasqua, we will return and you gentlemen can help us find a Jackalope."
"Maybe."
"Do you know their habitats? Where we could find them?" HH asked.
Well they're mighty hard to find if you go hunting them. You rarely find one if you're looking for it. They seem to like towns, but they hide in the alleys and are generally only seen late at night. Usually solitary men have seen them on their way home, but I don't know anyone who's caught one."
"Perhaps they're seen on these men's returns from the saloons?" Trumble leaned over and quietly asked the Kid. Curry nodded. Trumble snorted.
~~~oOo~~~
Three days later, they saw Trumble, HH, and Eggy off at the train station.
"What do you think they'll do when they find out those're prairie hen eggs, not Easter bunny eggs?" the Kid asked.
"Well, if I know Trumble, those eggs will meet with an accident before ever making it to London, and they'll never learn," answered Heyes, counting his money.
"Probably," the Kid laughed. "Say, how do you think he colored those eggs?"
"I don't know." Heyes looked up from his money counting. "Now I think of it, I really never have seen a white rabbit in the wild before."
"Heyes, you don't suppose it really was..." the Kid asked. "Nah…"
"Who knows at this point?" Heyes smiled and clapped the Kid on the back. "What say we head to the saloon and see if we can find ourselves some Jackalopes?"
"Jackalopes it is," the Kid laughed.