Happy Forth of July! And Happy birthday to you Mr. America! Just a silly little one shot I did to celebrate my country's independence day with a nifty little one shot based on my favorite pairing of all time! I warn you now it's ubber fluffy! But C'mon, lets get real here, who doesn't like a little fluff! Hope you all like it! Happy Fourth! :)
Happy Birthday America
"Thanks dudes for coming! That was such a blast!" I smile and waved at the countries leaving my house after yet another Fourth of July. A fun one at that, complete with big presents, big fireworks, and of course big cakes! I turned back into my house and sighed at the massive mother of all messes I was going to have to clean up. Decorations, empty cups and plates, the occasional unused faulty firework scattered here and there, this was going to be a LONG night of cleaning. Being the procrastinator I am, I turned to the couch and fiddled with some of the gifts I received before I start the clean up.
I picked up and examined further all the gifts from my friends, wondering which one I'd consider my favorite. There was a pair of expensive looking flight goggles accompanied by a bottle of "The Worlds Best" maple syrup, (Need I say who gave me that gift) the newest and scariest video game out there courtesy of Japan, a brand new Smith & Wesson revolver given to me by the awesome Prussia himself, a bottle of wine that is supposedly said to give the drinker the feeling of being absolutely in love, (Not that I needed it, I don't think I could be more in love.) and tons of other gifts from the rest of the other countries. And then there was his gift.
I clutched the red, white, and blue box with a tag saying "From England" dangling off the side of it. I held the box as far away from myself as I could as I untied the ribbon and popped off the top. A large spring loaded boxing glove immediately popped out of the box and swayed back and forth in the air until it stopped and remained suspended by the spring. Though a little painful for me, everyone else at the party found it hilarious when the glove punched me square in the face. Refusing to make that same mistake at the party, I made sure I had taken the proper precautions before re-opening the gag gift.
"Very funny Iggy." I said to myself. Every year England either attempted to get me an actual present, which tragically failed each time, or he resorted to a gag gift like this. The worst part is I really just had myself to blame for that. I would complain about the gifts Britain got me, like shirts or socks or that one year he got me The Complete Cookbook of English Cuisine. (With that last present I really thought he did that just to annoy me, turns out I was wrong…he was serious! Oops!) So now the Brit resorted to the cruel art of gag gifts. The trade started about three years ago, that year Iggy gave me chocolates, but not just any chocolates. Those specific chocolates were 5x's stickier than peanut butter and Laughy Taffy combined. Basically, that year I couldn't open my mouth for the rest of the night after devouring five of the chocolates.
Each year was something different and just when I thought I figured out what each of the gag gifts did, it turned around and bit me in the ass, so to speak. This year seemed to be the first year England used large objects popping out of box, he was evolving. Good one Iggy.
I poked again and again at the suspended boxing glove and made it sway back and fourth as I thought about the Brit. Don't get me wrong, I love Britain with all my heart, but don't you think after being together for as long as we have, he would know what I liked rather than indirectly punching me in the face? Lost in thought, I poked too hard at the box and accidentally knocked it over the table it rested on.
"Oh crap." I said as I leaned over to pick up the box. That's when I noticed the glove and spring separated from the box.
"I broke it." I said mildly surprised, or at least I think I broke it. I set the spring loaded glove aside and peered into the box. In the box, a red mid-sized note card rested at the very bottom and read;
Al! I am surprised you found this! To be honest I had my doubts that you would. Anyways, I first want to start off by saying happy birthday! Secondly, and most importantly, I have your true birthday gift with me. If you want to find me and the gift, you will have to figure out a small series of four clues I have left around your house, just for you! They are each completely different and will gradually get harder. Oh, by the way, you have until midnight before your gift expires. If you don't make it in time, I'll have to give you your gift at Christmas or some other time. But believe me when I say if I have to give it to you for Christmas, I'll make sure to create another challenge like this one, only harder. Good luck Alfred!
Love Arthur.
Here's your first clue:
If the next clue is what you hope to find, search under a pair of keys. Good luck! Remember, time is of the essence!
I glanced quickly at my watch, 11:18! Am I going to be able to find all of these clues on time? I hoped so. So the second clue is going to be under a pair of keys huh? Well the first thing that comes to mind when keys are mentioned is the key rack next to my front door. I sped over to the rack and only saw the keys to my house and cars.
"What the heck?" There was no note card or letter or even a slip of paper in sight! And believe me when I say I searched the area around the rack. There was nothing there!'
"Well then, if they're not there I'm gonna have to search any other place involving keys. If I were Britain, I think a good place to hide it would have to be a piano…if only I had one. Hm, maybe a key hole? It's worth a shot." I started to go through every door in the house, yet no note. The last door I checked was in the living room, the door leading out to the back yard. And surprise, surprise, no note.
"Well then where else could it be?" I said to myself as I glared at the furniture in the room. Not that it would help me find a clue or anything like that, but it did give me the chance to zone out and think where I would put a clue if I were Arthur. If I were him, I'd put it somewhere completely unexpected, yet kinda obvious at the same time. So let me see… maybe the-
"Oh you gotta be freakin' kidding me." I walked over to the computer desk and picked up my key board; there it was a white note card with "Clue Two" scribbled onto the front. Wow, I can't believe I didn't catch that sooner.
Congratulations Al! You found clue #2! I'm impressed! So here's your next clue:
Kings and Queens may cling to power
And the Jester's got his call
But you may all discover
The common one outranks them all.
Remember; solve these as quickly as you can!
Love Arthur
"Hm? The common one? What does that mean? C'mon Iggy, did you have to make it so difficult!" I walked out of the living room and paced the hallway as I went over the riddle in my head again and again, when a certain picture frame caught my eye. In my hallway I have a picture of every single one of my states, from the east coast to the west; they were all present on the wall. The one that had caught my eye was a picture of Nevada. Nevada is a very easy going, laid back, and fun state. She was the type of girl people love to hang out with. One specific pass-time of hers, which she excels at and rarely ever looses at, is gambling. Russian roulette, black jack, poker, the slots, you name it, she's played it. (And won at it) Her motto in life is even "The house ALWAYS wins!" And what is the one thing about Nevada that may just be the answer to this riddle? Playing cards! An Ace would outrank all the other cards! Thank you Nevada!
I ran to my bedroom and pulled my deck of vintage playing cards I got last Christmas (from Nevada) out of my night stand, and there it was, England's next clue tucked behind an Ace! Man, I'm getting good at this stuff!
Clue Three
Alfred, you're going to murder me for this one, but I really can't resist.
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Love Arthur
"Really Arthur? Really?" Now this is getting a little silly, he's stealing quotes now! And that quote doesn't even have a true answer, so that means I'm going to have to come up with this on my own! Arthur I swear…
I glanced at my watch once again, 11:45! Crap, I better get a move on this!
"A raven like a writing desk," I said out load. "Well it's got to do with something I know. Arthur wouldn't choose to base a clue off of something I have no idea about." I bit my nails and thought about the similarities between the two. The answer would have to be a physical object that can harbor a clue, but what could it be? A raven and a desk have nothing in common!
"A raven… hmm raven…Nevermore! Take thy beak from out my heart and take thy form from off my door! Quoth the raven, Nevermore!" I recited Edgar Allen Poe dramatically. And that would be a reasonable answer if you ask me! Edgar must be the answer, because Poe wrote on both! Nice one Arthur, using one of my favorite writers as an answer to your riddles. Now that wasn't too hard!
I ran to an office space I set aside for work and pulled down the books I had by Poe and in no time the fourth clue fluttered down into my hands.
Clue Four
Didn't I tell you this would be a short little clue find? Anyways, here is the last inkling I have! Hope you find it on time!
It runs and runs
But never tires.
It has a mouth, but cannot smile.
This is where I'll be, shorter than a mile
With a gift that is greater than any in that giant present pile.
Love Arthur
11:55, Oh boy I'm going to be cutting it close!
"Okay, so he's going to be within a range less than a mile, and it runs, but doesn't get tired. Oh and it's got a mouth but apparently doesn't smile… why does this all sound like Germany when he's running? No, no that can't be it. Within a mile? Hmm… Oh I think I got it! There's a river not to far away from my house! England has to be there!"
I made a mad dash out of the house and navigated my way to the river with a minute to spare! I silently congratulated myself as I called out Arthur's name again and again.
"Al!" I whipped around to see England's glossy emerald green eyes and blond hair pop put from behind a tree.
"I'm impressed, you actually made it! And with a minute to spare!"
"Why's a raven like a writing desk? Really Arthur?"
"I couldn't resist. And just as I promised, here this is for you!" He pulled put a small box wrapped in golden wrapping paper. I didn't hesitate to rip the paper to shreds, which left the little wooden box exposed.
"Arthur, I swear if this is another clue,"
"It's not, now just shut up and open it!"
"Alright, alright. Jees!" I popped open the lid to the box and inside rested a golden ring. My mouth gapped open as Arthur reached for the ring and slid it onto my left hand. He smiled at me and said;
"Alfred, will you-"
"Hell yeah!" I interrupted as I pulled the little Brit into a tight embrace and repeatedly kissed his bright red cheeks.
"Arthur," I said still tightly hugging him, "this is the BEST birthday present I have EVER gotten! I love you Art! So very much!"
"Happy birthday America!"
Soo, how'd you all like it? :) I hope you did anyways! Please feel free to review! I love reading what you guys think! Hope you liked it and once again Happy Fourth of July! :D
-Nash Stone