A/N: Another songfic! Yeah! **Groans from the audience** This one is humorous. **Extra groans** If you live through this you get, **does Dr. Evil thing** 100 billion...good luck. The song lyrics will be double or single starred. *
Disclaimer: Disney owns my song, and J.K. owns everything else.

Sung to "Kill the Beast" From Disney's Beauty and the Beast.

**Pack your wands, pack your books, give a kick to Mrs. Norris, we mustn't have any intruders in the way, **

"Harry! Harry!" Ron came running up. "I think I kicked Mrs. Norris a bit to hard, is she supposed to be walking funny like that?"

**Fred and George, did you tie Filch up really, really, tight, we're doing something that we won't do everyday. **

"Fred! Tie him tighter than that, his circulation isn't even being cut off!" "I can't! He's wiggling too much!" George struggled with the bonds that held Filch down. "I wish we had a devil's snare..." "You mean like that one?"

** (This is the refrain...) He's a beast with blue eyes, hypnotizing, we won't rest till his hair is deceased! We will roar we will pour, but we're not coming home till his curlers are ours! Kill the Beast! **

**Here we go, down the hall, where the "Lockhart Beast" is sleeping, we know we mustn't give ourselves away,

Hermione whipped her head around. "George! Stop sniggering and shut up! Filch turning blue can't be all that funny!"

**Here take that, Malfoy's wand, Crabbe's old boots and Goyle's spare robes, any evidence to lead the staff astray. **

Harry ran up to Hermione. "Hermione, how long until Malfoy changes back from being a slug and figures out we have his wand?" "Half and hour! Hurry!"

**Refrain**

**Say goodbye, to the spy, who is claiming he's a wizard but has never cast a real spell in his life, **

"I wonder if he can actually counteract spells," said Seamus thoughtfully to Neville. Neville looked quite shaken at the thought. "Lets hope not..."

**Get your wands, in your hands in there readily positions, Hermione find some spells to cause him strife**

Hermione dug through her bag, pulled out a thick and dull looking book, and flipped open the first few pages. "Found one!" She cried. "LETS GO!"

**Refrain**

**Cast a spell, say farewell, to your tiny little memory, we know you will turn over a new leaf, **

"Filch got out of the devils snare! Now what do we do?" (Zap sounds in the background.) "That." "That's got to hurt." "Not the spell I was thinking of to use on Lockhart, but we can use it as a backup." The Weasley twins grin evilly.

**We know that, somewhere far, someone will be really missing you, but not us, 'cause you've caused us too much grief, **

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN???" Hermione yelled. "I'LL MISS HIM!!!

**Refrain**

(All students sing)

"We will roar, we will pour, but we're not, coming home, 'til his vanity table is gone! Kill the beast!"

"OBLIVIATE!"