Frozen Thunder
By: Prissrei
Disclaimer: No I dont own it never will
Summary: I suck at this.. Just try reading it and find out
Pairings: Makoto/Rei... Hints of Rei/Ami
Have you ever had that feeling utter loneliness that seemed to engulf your soul making you feel utterly alone? Like you were standing in the middle of an snow covered field in the middle of the night? So that each time you talked much less yelled only your own voice came back to mock you? Thanks to the ever increasing snow fall that accumulated on the ground? Not only sending your own voice back to you but also swallowing it so no one else could hear your anguished cries? I did, and it ripped me apart, made me embittered towards anyone that tried to get near me, until she entered my life.
I remember when it all started, when the snow started falling encasing me in its frozen grip. It started not too long after my parents died in that horrible contraption human kind called a plane. It single handedly took my world away from me at a young age throwing me into a world of chaos. I wasn't old enough to even consider living on my own I was sent to an orphanage, not long mind you just long enough to make things seem even worse than they already were. The other children were just like me had no parents or relatives to take them in, rather unwilling to take them in in short sending them to this hell to be forgotten.
I managed to survive, I locked myself up let the snow encase me surround me and make me numb to the pain. I grew tired of crying they weren't coming back nothing could make them come back. The moment I could leave that hell hole I did, the adults in charge frowned upon me. Not for the fact that I refused to socialize with the other child but for the fact any school they sent me to I was kicked from for fighting. Didn't matter it wasn't my fault I was the outcast I was the one who didn't belong they all had their families their loved ones. Me, I had nothing but myself even while the snow continued to climb higher in my soul reaching my heart.
Now don't mistaken me for turning utterly cold I still had feelings I just chose not show them. It was easier that way, no one had to know that deep down the little girl that had lost everything still cried for comfort. But she was nothing compared to the woman I had become. Time had softened me a little since I ran into that girl Usagi Tsukino, who befriended me who somehow saw the person slowly being swallowed by the snow that continued to fall. She stopped the snowfall but did nothing to thaw it and free me from its confines. No the one that managed to do that was a raven haired priestess who showed no interest in me beyond being my friend.
But yet I never gave each time I was near the miko I felt the snow melt around me a little more. It forced me to deal with my demons in my haunting nightmares that I worked so hard to ignore. Each time I was looked at as no more than a friend I felt horrible my past pains felt nothing like the stabbing pain I felt each time. Slowly killing me each time, more so when I caught the looks she sent towards another person in our group, the one who controlled ice. Seemingly trying to melt the ever studious girl's ice around her. I thought it was best to kept my thoughts and feelings to myself only the snow wouldn't fall the snow wouldn't start piling anymore, it wouldn't allow me to isolate myself as I wish it would.
Throughout each fight we took part in, all of us fighting alongside each other, I was joyful she was near me helping me when I needed it. Her gracefulness on the battle field was unheard of, never knew of anyone with those kinds of moves in high heels. She was only challenged in my eyes by the senshi of Neptune. Who exhumed grace with every breath, whereas the miko showed passion at every turn. Following her heart no matter what she decided to do. I feel almost saddened now that there is peace for I will no longer see her fight unless something comes forth to threaten that which we fought so hard for and lost our lives for at one time.
Now that we were all grown I had followed my dreams took what was left of my inheritance that my parents left me opening my own restaurant. The only other thing that kept me sane, it was my baby so to speak something that wouldn't hurt me. I rarely take a night off from working so it was a surprise when the object of my true affections suddenly gave me a call requesting my presence. I couldn't remember the last time we spoke and then it had ended on a bad terms causing us not to speak for quite some time. Something I regretted but her words cut me to the quick, I couldn't look at her the same. I had an excuse each time Usagi or one of the others wanted me to join them for a get together, work.
But now after all this time of silence she wanted to speak of what I didn't know, nor did I care. I was apprehensive as to what could happen and what wouldn't happen. Something's were meant to be just dreams and I had contented myself to that. As I got ready for our little meeting I wanted to scream once more but I knew it wouldn't do me much good. I wasn't stupid I had been left alone a long time ago in that field, surrounded by the snow that mocked me with the echo's and swallowing my cries before they could reach the one who could save me. Grabbing out my favorite cream colored slacks as well as my favorite crimson colored shirt I went about getting ready. Already having made sure my business was in good hands for the night, I trusted my staff they have been with me from the beginning.
She never said for sure when she would be at my door step just had announced she would pick me up this evening. Not once did she call it a date nor would I think of it as such. We were just two friends going out to catch up. I fully intended to pay my share of things as I pocketed my wallet made sure my keys were nearby and within easy reach when she arrived. I had heard of her failed attempts with the senshi of ice. But nothing out of that made me feel good I kept to myself, how her love life went I paid no attention. I myself knew I was better off alone and worked to keep it that way. The knock on door startled me; I didn't realize how nervous I was until I heard that one single knock.
It caused me to smile she was never one to do things over board, but rather she was secure enough within herself she always thought once was enough she had nothing to prove to anyone. She handled losing her parents far better than I ever did, granted her father still lived but had very little to do with her. Her grandfather had long since taken over that role in his own way, something that had proved to be very good for her. Walking to the door I didn't say anything it wasn't my way, never was. As my hand rose to meet the cool brass knob and turned the mechanism slowly feeling the latch give before I pulled open the door. Planting a smile of welcome on my lips as I did so still not saying anything as I shifted allowing her to enter, my eyes drinking in the sight of her.
The time we spent apart only seemed to enhance her looks to me, age had served her well she looked even more beautiful than ever. When we were in school it only hinted at the woman she would become. It was impossible to believe she didn't have men and women alike falling at her feet begging for the chance that she would even glance at them. I knew I would have at one point, not now though I have grown to see that it wasn't something that would make me happy. "Give me just one moment Rei-chan, I just need to go double check the back door then I'm ready to go." Was that my voice? I don't ever remember it being that unsteady, even when talking to her.
Turning to go check on the back door of my home as I had said I took my time. Wanting to settle my nerves bring myself back on an even keel. The sight of her had almost been my undoing, I never expected her to show up at my door in that dress. The burgundy fabric clung to her like a second skin, hugging each curve like a lover would, showing off her figure perfectly. She had to know what she did to me with that dress with just that alone but no it continued the neck line swooped down low enough it gave one a tantalizing view of the starting swell of her breasts as one strap came up over her left shoulder holding the already sinuous material to her frame. Her hair is as I always remembered it hanging loosely down her back looking as if it was waiting to be a blanket for the one who claimed the child of fire. Her light make up only succeeded to enhance her already good looks; she looked as if she stepped right out of a glossy page from a model magazine.
Shaking the dancing visions from my mind as I pictured that dress falling from her frame, was not something I wanted to do but needed to be done. I refuse to lose a friend because I can't keep in the right frame of mind. Making sure the door was locked I proceeded back to where she waited only halting as I reentered my living room. As sparsely decorated as it was it was still as I like it. Few pictures adorned my walls with one in particular setting on a stand facing the door to greet me each time I entered. I knew this picture well it was the one that had been taken the day we all graduated, before decisions that were made changed the courses of our lives making our once close knit family spread out a bit.
Others from that day sat in an album tucked away safely from prying eyes. But this one had been taking without me realizing what was going on. I had been talking to Rei, something that never failed to make a smile form on my lips or my hard attitude soften as the snow in that field melted and someone seemingly came to my rescue; or so I thought. She had just given me a hug before turning me towards the waiting camera. My smile was anything but a friendly smile, it showed actual happiness something I hadn't known since before I lost my parents. I had leaned into her as her arms settled around my waist making me feel comforted. Her look was carefree but I could always imagine that smile was loving, and that arm was her claim to me. It made us look like a couple, it was my favorite picture and also my favorite torture of what I could never have.
I cleared my throat after a minute, she was so engrossed in the picture she never noticed me returning. Something I found odd, she never used to let anyone sneak up on her unless she was doing a fire reading and even then it was dangerous to do so. I knew this from experience, each of our little family did it only took once for us to each learn. She didn't start as I expected she would, she just set the frame she had picked up back into its place her finger tips caressed the frame lovingly. This pained me I had wanted to feel that touch at one time and still did. She was the reason I couldn't move on, the reason why I couldn't look at another person to be in my life like I wanted, no needed her to save me from that cold abyss I had long since fallen into.
She turned smiling at me a smile I hadn't seen in such a long time it made me catch my breath at the sight of it. That was the smile she used to show to the ice senshi, why I receiving it was what I wanted to know. "Sorry Mako-chan I was just looking around a bit while I waited." She paused as if she was trying to figure out how to continue. It perplexed me. "I guess I got lost in this one picture here," She tilted her head I knew she was going to ask why that was the only one truly visible to a visitors. I steeled myself for the question but it never came. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who cherishes that picture." I blinked I couldn't believe my ears. She had the same picture out on display for all to see? It didn't seem possible much less plausible, she probably had several pictures from that day sitting around her room, the one of her and Ami probably set close to her bed. That thought alone had me fighting a sneer that wanted to cross over my lips.
That one thought ruined my mood I wanted to snap at her force her to leave but I had promised I would try to make the best of our little outing and push all those other thoughts out of my mind. "It's fine Rei-chan. I just never got around to putting the rest out." No she didn't need to know the truth I refused to tell her. She had in her own way caused me enough pain I didn't need more. "I'm ready when you are." She gave a nod as she headed back towards the door opening it before stepping back through waiting patiently on the front stoop for me to appear. Something I did rather quickly closing the door after I emerged outside and locking it before pocketing my keys. I didn't ask where we were going I just followed her to her car. Opening her door for her as she entered the car closing it after she was fully inside and moving back over to the passenger side to get settled into my own seat.
I didn't glance over at her as she drove I didn't even pay attention to the passing sights around me. I was too engrossed in my own thoughts. What did she want from me? What did she hope to gain from this little outing? I couldn't play the distraction for her as I had so many years ago my heart couldn't take it. Not when it cried out for her to save me from the loneliness that seemed to engulf me at every turn. I hadn't even been aware the care had stopped or that my door was being held open for me. I accepted the proffered hand as I stepped from the car, seeing that Rei had already been offered the same service before someone took her keys from her to park her vehicle. I glanced around now as I stepped up next to her automatically offering her my arm which she willingly looped hers through it.
A sight we had to be, atleast it seemed that way as all eyes turned towards us as we entered the restaurant. I knew this place and its owner, it was one of the more well-known traditional Japanese establishments. And it was rare to get an reservation in anything less than three months ahead of time. It made me wonder just how long she had planned this and what she was up to. I myself could have managed getting a reservation on the fly and that was because the owner owed me a favor. The Maitre d' himself led us to our table. Taking us towards the back, away from the other guests this in itself made my sweat a bit.
It was nothing less the romantic atmosphere that was being dropped in my lap something I had no way to prepare for. As we settled in our chairs we weren't asked what we would like to drink the man just scurried off only to return a moment later with a bucket of ice accompanied by an bottle of wine one he showed to her. One she barely glanced at as she nodded it wasn't until now that I realized her eyes had yet to leave me in any shape or form. This made me squirm in my seat, no one had ever looked at me that way, or atleast that I could remember.
The miko though looking at me like that was very new I didn't know how to react. I didn't even pay attention to the server as our glasses were poured the bottle then placed into the bucket next to us. I wasn't stupid I knew about how much that bottle alone cost this made my head spin, just what was going through the raven haired girls mind. Was she that desperate she turned to me? Or was there something I was missing? Something I should have known all along but had missed since I had isolated myself and become far more comfortable then I should have in my own snowy prison and endless torture it brought to me.
I could do little more than arch an eyebrow at her requesting silently an explanation as to what was going on. As I took a sip of glass letting the wine flow smooth down over my tongue and throat she finally spoke. "I know this seems odd, me calling you up out of the blue inviting you to come spend the evening with me like a.." Her voice trailed off like she was hesitant. I almost grinned at the deep breath she took to steady herself as she continued. "I just want to spend some time with you… time we never got to spend together when we were younger."
I was floored to say the least I could see her squirm now, it was ever so slightly one had to pay attention to catch it, it was that subtle. She never finished that first sentence but then again I can fill in a blank. It was what it seemed like the question was; why she was reflecting on their past and a missed opportunity?
A/N: Yes I know its been like forever since I've done something on here.. Sorry been busy and dealing with several important rl issues that sprung up. I do fully intend to work on Vampire inside.. The story Longing I'm considering putting it on hiatus depends if I can come up with ideas for it.. Or if someone can give one that will go along with the story. I swear I'll try to update sooner then I have as of late. But its dependent on how much free time I have between classes, studying, getting out RP posts and considering joining an RP group. if you would like to talk to me you can email me at Priss(underscore)rei8503(at)yahoo(dot)com or find me on YIM. I'm up for ideas for any of the stories. Anyways please R&R this is my first time writing in a First person POV. Thank you
~Prissrei