Title: Fierce Bitch Baby!

Rating: M for inappropriate use of a foot massager

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto I would fully fund Johnny Weir's visions, dreams, and anything else he would ask of me! Until then I can just Youtube him *swoon*

Description: Naruto embraces two loves: Johnny Weir's foot massager and sex.

Author's Note: OMG is anyone else in love with the fabulously delicious man meat known as Olympic figure skater Johnny Weir? I absolutely love everything about him, from his pink tassel to his beautiful heart shaped butt. DID ANYONE ELSE SEE HIM IN CHICAGO AT ICE DREAMS?! Johnny Weir acknowledged my existence!

Playlist: Johnny and I both love our Gaga!

~~~~Enbu no akumu…

Naruto fell deeply, madly in love. Now if anyone were to ask, he would say his relationship with Sasuke was going smoothly but Naruto could not deny the love he held for Olympic figure skater Johnny Weir.

Naruto practically made love to the TV every time his beloved Johnny graced the screen. The Olympics brought Naruto closer to his idol and his reality show made Naruto almost melt every time the Sundance channel played a rerun or new episode. Naruto loved his beloved Johnny so much he purchased a pair of ice skates in hopes Sasuke would role play as Johnny in bed. Sasuke on the other hand was not too thrilled.

Still Naruto (or Sasuke for that matter) could not figure what made Johnny so appealing. Maybe it was Johnny's beautifully graceful skate routines which could only be compared angels dancing? Or perhaps his charming personality and his fierce 'you-can't-stop-me' attitude? Or maybe Naruto loved his Marie Antoinette mullet, sparkling eyes, cherubic baby face, and pure smile that would melt diamonds to mush? Whatever it was Naruto could not get enough of the gorgeous figure skater, which led to Naruto's addiction to the reality show.

So Naruto sat on his couch, having missed the previous night's episode and catching the rerun during the day. The end of the episode came much too fast for Naruto's taste, but the end held the best for last. Naruto sat, transfixed at the TV as Johnny thoroughly enjoyed the company of a foot massager. Before Johnny could cry out, "Oh daddy," Naruto was halfway to the door with one goal in mind: Bed, Bath, and Beyond.

Half an hour later, Naruto returned to his shared apartment with his new toy of a foot massager. Pulling the massager out of the box, Naruto dimmed the lights to test out his new toy.

"Oh Johnny, you are so right," moaned Naruto as he laid his feet. "Time to have fun."

Naruto moved to lay his ankles across the machine, all the while moaning and enjoying the sensation. Just like Johnny mounted the massager, Naruto mounted his when all the lights in the bedroom came on.

"Exactly what are you doing?" asked a rather amused Sasuke standing in the doorway, one hand still on the light switch.

"Ah, Sasuke you should try this," cooed Naruto still atop of the massager.

Sasuke laughed. "What the hell is that thing even for?"

Naruto closed his eyes and smiled. "For Johnny to feel fabulous."

Sasuke went over to his boyfriend and turned off the machine. Naruto protested with curses and Sasuke laughed again.

"I should have known Johnny was involved. I swear when we have sex, is it me or Johnny you are thinking about?" he asked.

Naruto thought for a moment which caused Sasuke to get annoyed. "You have to think about the answer?" he cried out.

"Well do I have to choose?" Naruto snapped back.

Sasuke pulled Naruto off the machine and sat himself down in it instead. "Let's see if this thing is worth how ever much you paid for it."

Sasuke switch on the machine and laid back. He was overcome with surprise for the massager really was quite enjoyable. He closed his eyes in relaxation to fully enjoy the machine.

"So you like it?" Naruto asked.

"I guess we can keep it," Sasuke sighed as he sat up. He looked over at Naruto then smirked. "All right, I admit Johnny did something good with this idea."

He pulled Naruto close to him and gave him a sweet kiss. Naruto smiled at the romantic gesture but that smile dropped when Sasuke practically ripped off Naruto's shirt.

"What the-" a confused Naruto tried to ask as Sasuke ripped off both of their clothing materials. Sasuke pulled Naruto closer with his back against Sasuke's stomach. He attached his lips to the tan neck facing him and enjoyed the treatment he gave his lover.

"So I guess you really like the machine?" Naruto asked, melting into Sasuke's embrace. Sasuke muttered something against Naruto's neck, the vibration of his breath sending a shutter down Naruto's spine. Naruto reached his hand around to Sasuke's crotch and gave a squeeze. Sasuke lifted his hips up towards Naruto's hand, allowing Naruto to run his hand along Sasuke's now growing member. Sasuke himself reached his hand around Naruto and massaged Naruto's own body.

A few moments of the same seductive activity, Sasuke decided enough was enough and pulled Naruto onto his lap, straddling it. Naruto wrapped his arms around his heated boyfriend and rolled those delicate hips up for Sasuke to have room. Sasuke kissed Naruto's ear in a pleasing manner; he loved when his Naruto was ready for submission.

Pulling a bottle of lubricant from who-knows-where, Sasuke coated his finger liberally and poked the quivering entrance. Pleased with the way the hole sucked in his finger, Sasuke pumped his finger in and out of the hole to get it thoroughly slicked. He reached with his other hand to tweak the tip of Naruto, wanting to tease him a bit more.

"Sasuke, stop…..teasing" Naruto moaned out. He sucked a sensitive spot on Sasuke's neck to get him to speed up. Getting the hint, Sasuke shoved in another finger and stretched the hole to his accommodation.

"All right Naruto, here we go," Sasuke lifted Naruto's hips to hover over Sasuke's lap, and then their bodies made contact. Naruto slowly lowered himself down on Sasuke's lap until he felt himself entirely filled and used the feeling. A twitch of hips and Naruto lifted up slowly, then to Sasuke's surprise rammed back down. Naruto continued this pattern, gripping to Sasuke's neck in a vice.

"I got this Naruto," Sasuke whispered. He grabbed Naruto's hips and intensified the motions of bringing Naruto crashing down and Sasuke raising his own hips for deeper contact. A repeated pattern as Sasuke adjusted his angles to find what he so desired, and then Naruto nearly pulled his hair out as he cried out. Sasuke smirked and hit the spot again to the same effect.

Sasuke kept thrusting in that angle until he felt his own completion beginning to come full circle. Several deep thrusts and he found himself emptying inside of Naruto, who held on to Sasuke for dear life. Naruto continued to bounce on Sasuke's spurting member until he too soiled their bodies. The pair found themselves a tangle mess on the floor, Sasuke's legs still locked on the foot massager.

"We can keep the machine," Sasuke murmured, sedated. Naruto gave a whoop of joy and proceeded to kiss the day-lights out of Sasuke's neck. Sasuke grabbed Naruto's middle and tossed him onto the bed, ready for round two. Just as Sasuke crawled on top for Naruto, he pushed off Sasuke and ran to the closet.

"Please Sasuke," Naruto begged as he held up a pair of ice skates.

Sasuke could not help but wonder if murder by ice skate blades were possible.

End.

So at Ice Dreams, wearing the awesome shirt I made with Johnny being beautiful on it, I cried out to Johnny as he passed by during the photo shoot "Johnny you are beautiful and fabulous and I love you so much! Will you stop for a picture?" He laughed his adorable modest laugh and STOPPED FOR ME TO TAKE A PICTURE! JOHNNY WEIR ACKNOWLEDGED MY EXISTENCE!

So aside from my fangirling, thanks for reading! Here's to all the Weirlandians out there!

~Dante