Snow splattered all over his clothes, causing Ichigo to cry out in surprise. The snowball he had in his hand was at the ready the moment he saw any movement. Squinting and looking over the snow covered ground, Ichigo tried to make out any human looking figures. More snow pelted his back. Immediately, he turned around and threw his snowball in the general direction of where he was hit. There was no point in looking out for his best friend out in the snow, especially when he blended in with the ground.
"This isn't fair, Shi! You have to get up and move!" Ichigo stubbornly crossed his arms and made a move to go back inside, done with this game. However, Ogihci suddenly got up and tackled Ichigo back to the ground in the snow with a laugh. Snowflakes covered his winter jacket and parts of his face, which Ichigo puffed his cheek at in annoyance. From the ground, he aimlessly grabbed at whatever snow he could and hit his best friend with it after he cheated.
"That's what you get."
"Using your surroundings is the first part to a good strategy." He grinned down at Ichigo and finally got up, brushing the snow off of his clothes. "That and going for the easiest target," he said, pointing up at Ichigo's orange hair. Ichigo stuck his tongue out at Ogihci. He was never going to agree to snowball fighting with him again.
Suddenly, Masaki opened the door and peeked out to call them both in. The two children didn't want to go inside just yet, but Masaki had another idea.
"Guess that means none of you wants the special holiday hot chocolate, then?" She gave them a smirk as she saw them get interested now. Exactly how she planned. Ogihci and Ichigo looked at each other.
"Last one in is a rotten egg?" Shiro challenged, giving Ichigo a smirk.
"You're on."
Ogihci was at the top rung of the ladder with the Christmas tree star in his hand. Ichigo was at the bottom of the ladder, holding it for stability. He was looking up at Ogihci with a worried expression, praying that his best friend won't fall.
"Shi, we can just ask your parents for help …"
"No, I got this. I told them we could handle it. We're almost highschoolers now, we can do this."
Of course, Ichigo wasn't convinced. He was prepared to run to Ogihci's parents in case anything happened. At least he knew Karin and Yuzu were safe with his Dad back at home … Maybe. Anxiously, Ichigo watched as Ogihci reached out for the top of the Christmas tree and stuck the star on the pine tree branch. "There!" He climbed down.
Releasing his breath, Ichigo stepped back to admire the decorated tree they spent hours doing for Christmas. "We're finally done. Where's the switch for the lights? We should test it." Ichigo looked around briefly before finding it next to the tree. Taking the switch, he turned it on as Ogihci moved to stand next to him. Before he could turn it on, though, Ogihci nudged him a little with a smile.
"C'mon, show a little more enthusiasm, Ichi."
"When you're not about to fall off a ladder, any time."
To cheer Ichigo up a little, Ogihci put his arm around his friend's shoulders and reassured him that he was going to be safe from now on. Sighing, Ichigo mumbled that he was just worried. When they were done talking about it, Ichigo finally switched on the lights, which immediately brightened up the room. The wall nearest to the lights lit up with green, red, and blue. The pair stood in silence to admire their work.
"See, told you we could do it," Ogihci said, teasing Ichigo for his doubts beforehand.
"Don't blame me, this was the first time any of us set up a Christmas tree."
"Next year, we'll do it at your house then. That'll make it the second time."
"Yeah yeah … Merry Christmas, Shi."
"Merry Christmas to you too, Ichi."
In the middle of class, Ichigo and Ogihci received a text in the group chat they were a part of from Rukia. She wanted to do a secret Santa with everyone. Since it sounded fun, they both agreed to take a part in it. After getting everyone's response, Rukia went and set up a meeting place to draw for names and a set date to open the gifts. On their way there, Ichigo and Ogihci met up with each other and Ichigo sent Ogihci a smile which was gladly returned.
"You know, you shouldn't be texting in class, Ichi," Ogihci joked, earning a chuckle from Ichigo.
"Don't talk to me, Mr. First Response."
"After everything we've been through?"
"Never crossed my mind."
"And here I thought we had something."
The conversation each caused them to break out in laughter, which caused a few stares from the other students, but most of them were used to it by now. There wasn't a day where people didn't see them together. That's how it was.
When they finally saw Rukia, she was already surrounded by a circle of all their friends, which was quite large. Especially for two freshmen.
"You two are late!" Rukia scolded, stomping her foot dramatically and shaking the hat in her hand for emphasis. "Now that everyone is here," she holds out the hat in the center of the circle for everyone to reach in, "pick your recipient!"
Everyone reached in and got a slip of paper. Before opening them up, Rukia warned them to make sure to not tell anyone about the person they got. When they all scattered, Ogihci slid up right next to Ichigo when he saw him opening his paper slip. He practically touched cheeks with him as he looked over his shoulder. But Ichigo knew better than that. He turned his head to the side a little to look at Ogihci with a tiny smirk on his face. "Oh, don't think it's going to be that easy, Shi." He had closed the paper slip right before he could get a look at it.
"Aw, c'mon, for me?" He also turned to look Ichigo in the eye. An attempt to beg. Even if he didn't want it a lot.
"You're not getting anything out of me, Shi." Ichigo's eyes were lit up with mirth and it brightened up his expression. For a moment, Ogihci couldn't stop staring, even as Ichigo lightly pushed him off. "Let's walk home, now."
He really wanted something out of Ichigo this time.
Before following Ichigo, he took a quick glance down at his own paper. Not Ichigo. Oh well, better luck next time.
The group of friends Ichigo and Ogihci were a part of headed up the roof for lunch, as they always did. As they settled down to eat, Ichigo remembered something suddenly and pulled out a package of some really nice chocolate.
"I got some for the holidays and I thought we could share it." Ichigo offered the chocolates to all of his friends. Orihime seemed amazed at the chocolate and asked where Ichigo got the money to buy the brand of chocolates. Ichigo stayed silent for a moment, unsure about how to answer. He rubbed his arm a little and glanced off to the side. Ogihci raised an eyebrow at the change in his demeanor, never seeing him change so quickly with a simple question.
"Actually …" Ichigo started and then stopped. Taking a deep breath, he continued, "I didn't buy the chocolates. I found it in my locker today without a tag or anything." He took one of the chocolate out of the box and ate it in thought. "I can't think of many people who would go out of their way to do it for me, though. It's really sweet and …"
Unbeknownst to Ichigo, all of his friends took a quick glance at Ogihci, who was too preoccupied with his best friend to notice. But all of the attention went back to Ichigo the moment he rambled on about the ideas he had.
"I could only imagine it may have been my, uh … boyfriend." His face immediately turned red after saying that. It was the first time he was announcing it to anyone and he knew everyone there was accepting of his sexuality, but it still embarrassed him. Especially when no one said anything. It was Ogihci who spoke up first.
"You … have a boyfriend? Since when?"
"Ah, about a week now? He asked me out, so …"
Ogihci took a deep breath and grinned. "After a year, you finally got yourself going, huh?"
"Shut up, Shi! You haven't even dated anyone yet."
"Oh? Perhaps I'm saving my heart for later."
"Yeah, right."
The bell rang then. Uryu suggested that they get going, which everyone agreed to, so they all got up. Before leaving, they thanked Ichigo for sharing the chocolates. Everyone else left, but Rukia took a hold of Ogihci's wrist so he trailed behind the rest of their friends. She looked up at him with a glare and a deep frown on her face. Ogihci looked away and stared at Ichigo's back as he walked away.
"I know what you're going to say," he whispered.
"Are you ever going to tell him?"
He hesitated, knowing deep down that he wanted nothing else. Rukia interrupted before he even had a chance to talk.
"What about the gift? When are you planning on telling him that it was you?"
"I …" Ogihci couldn't continue. Couldn't even look her in the eye.
"You weren't," Rukia said, exasperated. She let go of his wrist and shook her head. "Do you think he would hate you or something? You've been friends forever, Ichigo wouldn't."
"Let him be happy be with his boyfriend. Don't tell him."
"I won't. Besides, it isn't my job."
Ogihci was helping decorate for Christmas day at Ichigo's house this time around. He was outside with Yuzu and Karin, holding the roll of lights to hang over the house while they carefully put it on the edges of the roof. Ichigo was inside, helping his father with the tree. When it was time for the star, Ichigo went and called for his sisters and best friend, who happily went in. Once everything was ready, Ogihci and Ichigo decided to head out for a small walk since it was a nice day.
The snow crunched beneath their feet and Ichigo was really happy, which made Ogihci happy as well.
"Something exciting coming up?" Ogihci questioned, glancing over at Ichigo with his own smile.
"It's almost Christmas, if that counts."
"Don't fool me now, Ichi, I know you don't get this excited for Christmas."
"I should really stop trying with you, you know that? Yeah, I have a date tomorrow."
"Oh, another one, huh?" Ogihci teased, stepping in front of Ichigo to stop him, smirking at his confession of having a new boyfriend. Ichigo took this chance to flick Ogihci on the forehead, earning him a cry of surprise.
"Oh, no you don't. You're not going to scare this one away, Shi. When I bring him over, you behave."
At the accusation, Ogihci put a hand over his chest and gasped dramatically. "Me? Scare away your lovers? I would never! I only wish the best for you! Doing such a thing … It's simply impossible!"
Ichigo rolled his eyes and grinned, pushing Ogihci back lightly at his dramatic response. "You're the absolute worst, Shi."
"But you do know I only do it for you?"
"Of course. You know your advice means a lot to me."
When everyone came back to school after Christmas break, Ichigo found himself another present in his locker. He was expecting it at this point honestly. Every single year for every single Christmas, he received a new package in his locker. And every time, it was a gift he couldn't help but love and cherish. Chocolates, limited edition Shakespeare books, t-shirts that he wore almost every day … When he opened the new one, Ichigo just stared at it in wonder. It was a notebook with a very ornate design on the cover. He flipped through it and couldn't help but smile and get excited.
His boyfriend came up then to take a look at what Ichigo was looking at. "Oh! I see you finally opened the present!"
"You really keep outdoing yourself. You don't need to do this stuff for me, you know." Ichigo left a kiss on his boyfriend's cheek as thanks. However, Ogihci was listening nearby. He didn't want to, he felt bad, but … Has Ichigo's new boyfriend been taking credit for his gifts? He took a deep breath in order to calm himself and clenched and unclenched his first. Goddammit.
Looks like he had to look into their relationship after all. He couldn't let Ichigo fall into a bad relationship.
"Another secret Santa!" Rukia called out, holding out the hat. "We might as well, right? Orihime wanted to do another one and I'm not one to deny!"
Everyone reached in to grab a slip of paper. Ogihci opened up his and sighed, trying not to show his disappointment. Not Ichigo. Putting it away in his pocket, he looked to where Ichigo was standing and moved to go over to him so they can walk home.
While walking back, Ogihci got a text from Rukia. She found out that Ichigo's boyfriend drew Ichigo from the hat. She heard a conversation among him and his friends. Ichigo noticed him staring at his phone intensely, so he nudged his friend. "You okay?"
"Huh? Yeah, yeah … Sorry. M' just thinking about what to get my person is all. It's a hard job, you know."
"Aren't you a crowd pleaser," Ichigo joked, essentially giving Ogihci an ego boost. He didn't need it, but Ichigo didn't mind. When he got home, Ogihci stood outside for a little bit, staring at the Kurosaki Clinic. He didn't want to see Ichigo disappointed … He had a feeling that his boyfriend didn't know a thing about what Ichigo wants. But what could he do? The day of exchange was in a few days.
When the day arrived, he had his gift in hand and headed over to the Kuchiki house. It was the only house that was big enough to hold a group of people in one circle, so Rukia gladly opened up her house to her friends. For once, Ogihci and Ichigo weren't travelling together. Ogihci made up an excuse to head off alone so he could sneak another present in Ichigo's locker for later. He arrived late, but it was fine. Rukia didn't seem to approve though, but she never did when it came to Ogihci's avoidance of his own feelings.
"Alright! Now that everyone is here, you can hand your presents to your recipients!"
The entire room filled up with chatter quickly and it got loud and was bustling with activity. Everyone was trying to a find someone, it was almost chaotic. Ogihci found his person rather quickly, thankfully, so he could observe Ichigo. He got a rather big present, so his hopes were a little higher, however … Ogihci knew Ichigo got happier with the small things. He was a simple one to please. He smiled fondly at the idea and watched him open his present.
It hurt watching Ichigo's face turn into one of excitement into confusion and then into disappointment. Ichigo hid it well though and still kissed his boyfriend. Ogihci glared at Ichigo's boyfriend. He wasn't good enough for Ichigo and he definitely wasn't going to make him happy.
At least when they returned to school, Ichigo could look forward to something in his locker again.
"Shirosaki, I need to talk to you." Rukia called out, walking over to him right after everyone drew their recipients for the final secret Santa of their highschool lives.
"Is something the matter?"
"Yeah. I don't know if you noticed, but it's senior year and you have yet to confess to Ichigo."
"He has a boyfriend."
"Please, he's dating an asshole. But he's too ... you know, too nice. Too in love. Too … too much like himself. He loves the guy and all. Nevertheless, you know you're perfect for him, stop hiding it."
"What do you plan on doing about it then?"
Rukia grinned, who waited for him to ask that question. She held out a slip of paper to him. "It has Ichigo's name on it."
Ogihci blinked. And then blinked again. "Doesn't that mean someone didn't draw one at all?"
"Chad was willing to carry a blank piece of paper around with him in his pocket, so he didn't have to draw. He cares for Ichigo almost as much as you do." Without waiting for a response, Rukia shoved the piece of paper in Ogihci's pocket. "Show Ichigo the truth."
Everyone stood together in a circle for their last secret Santa of the year. For their last time together. Ogihci held his present for Ichigo and for the first time, it had his name written on it. And he thought it was perfect. It was time for the exchange. Again, chaos engulfed the room as people handed over their gifts. Ogihci walked over to Ichigo, who couldn't hide his surprise.
"You ended up as my secret Santa?"
"You know it. Let's just say luck was on my side this time." He threw Ichigo a wink, who only laughed and bid him away.
"Get going, you dork."
"Anything for you, your majesty." Ogihci bowed and stepped away, continuing to keep an eye on his best friend. This time he was going to make Ichigo happy about his gift. It was well thought out and he'd always wanted to get it for Ichigo, not to mention it wasn't half-assed, like last year's. Never like last year's.
Ichigo looked down at his gift, considerably smaller than the last one he got for this event. He opened it up and blinked at it multiple times, as if he couldn't believe his eyes. It was a medium sized box in a nice pastel blue color with white text written on it, revealing it was an assortment of tea bags. Lifting up the tab and throwing it open, he dug through the contents. Green tea, black tea, lemon delight, earl grey black tea, peppermint tea … All in small packages. Ichigo couldn't wait to try some at home. He closed it up and looked to where Ogihci was. This was … something he wasn't expecting out of him. Actually, it was what he expected out of his own boyfriend. After all, it was his boyfriend who kept putting all these amazing gifts for him in his locker … right?
No.
That wasn't it.
That was never it.
"Shi …?"
Ichigo invited Ogihci over right after Christmas day, telling him he needed help getting the decorations down. Which wasn't a lie. They actually did tear down the decorations, although, Ogihci stayed a little longer at Ichigo's request. They were in Ichigo's room and Ogihci was lying in his bed as Ichigo went around his room.
"What are you doing?"
"Looking for something."
"Do you … need any help?"
"No. Stay there," Ichigo commanded, finally pulling out a box, gift-wrapped and everything. Then, he handed it to his best friend. "Here."
Ogihci stared at it.
"What is this for?"
"As thanks. For everything you've done. Everything you've given me since the beginning of highschool."
"So you finally realized," Ogihci said, taking the gift from Ichigo's hands and sitting up. Ichigo scoffed and sat down next to him with his arms crossed.
"It's not my fault you didn't say anything."
"Touché." He opened the gift. Inside was a neatly folded sweater, extremely soft to the touch. So soft that Ogihci couldn't help but touch it again and again, even go as far to unfold it and hug it close to himself. Ichigo smiled, glad that he liked the gift, but it wouldn't come close to what he now owes to Ogihci.
He hated himself. He hated himself for never thinking of his best friend when he got those presents. He always thought it was boyfriend who couldn't even bring himself to help plan out dates or to have any sort of interest in the things he likes. Ichigo never did tell Ogihci about the clearance sticker that was on most, if not all, of his gifts he got from his boyfriend. It wasn't hard to notice Ogihci's anger. He didn't want to make him any angrier.
"Shi, I … I'm sorry."
"What are you apologizing for?"
"After everything you did for me and everything we've been through, I never gave you the credit you deserved. I ignored everything you did for me. Hell, I even went and gave thanks to another person and –" Ichigo was knocked down, his back pressing against the bed with Ogihci above him and pining down his shoulders.
"Don't apologize. Don't blame yourself. You did fine, Ichi."
"But I –"
Suddenly, Ogihci kissed him. And Ichigo didn't push him away or resist him. He closed his eyes and put his arms around his best friend … No. That wasn't right. Ogihci was his crush. His boyfriend.
Ogihci pulled away from Ichigo, his breath coming out as quiet pants. "I love you, Ichigo."
Ichigo put his hand on the back of Ogihci's head, his fingers threaded through his hair to pull him in for another kiss.
"I love you too, Shi."
They were both curled up on the couch together. Ogihci was resting his head on Ichigo's legs, sprawled out in front of him as Ichigo leaned back against the arm of the couch. It was cold outside and a blanket was covering half of Ogihci's body and Ichigo had his own, which was behind him and over his shoulders. The proximity of his boyfriend's body was enough to keep him warm. He also had a nice cup of hot chocolate in his hands while Ogihci's cup was on the table in front of the couch, forgotten. Ogihci had his eyes closed as he cuddled up against Ichigo, which Ichigo found nothing short of cute.
"M' glad I got to spend this holiday with you. It's nice that we ended up in the same dorm."
"Mhm." A tired response was all he got. That was enough.
Ichigo didn't want to stop staring at Ogihci … He was beautiful. He took a sip out of his hot chocolate and enjoyed the holiday. The bright lights of their tiny Christmas tree on the window really set the mood. Ogihci shifted around and moved to give Ichigo a kiss, which he attempted to avoid.
"Hey! Not with my hot chocolate in my hands! It's gonna spill!"
Ogihci ignored him.
They ended up having to clean up the hot chocolate stain on their carpet.
The airport was full of people, left and right. Everywhere they turned, a crowd of people was always present, whether they were shopping or waiting or rushing. The sound of suitcase wheels and several boarding announcements drowned out any other sound. Ogihci was waiting for his plane to arrive at his gate. His head was on Ichigo's shoulders and Ichigo's head was on his. It was too early for this. But Ogihci couldn't risk missing the plane. The snow was holding up several planes and his was one of them. It was both a blessing and a curse.
On one hand, he had to call his guide at his destination to tell him that his flight was delayed and on the other, he had more time to spend with his lover. They were both looking outside and they had no doubts that the other was thinking the exact same thing.
"Promise you'll call or text as much as you can, Shi."
"Of course. I couldn't imagine my life without you."
They kissed. They didn't want to forget the feeling. They didn't want to forget the feeling of being close. They didn't want to forget anything.
"Maybe we can have a video call from time to time," Ogihci suggested, making eye contact with Ichigo. God, he didn't want to say goodbye to him.
"I'd love nothing more."
The intercom turned on and announced that the flight Ogihci was boarding was ready to start boarding passengers.
"I have to go."
"I know." Ichigo squeezed Ogihci's hand harder, not wanting to let go. He wanted to go with him, but he couldn't. He was still working on stuff in Japan. And Ogihci was working on stuff in another country where Ichigo couldn't readily visit.
His boyfriend got up and Ichigo followed him up until the line. "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too."
"Happy holidays, Shi …"
"You too. I love you."
"I love you, too."
Ichigo watched as Shiro disappeared in the hall leading to the doors of the airplane.
A text notification sound woke up Ichigo. He aimlessly searched for his phone with his hand and brought it up to his face. He cracked open his eyes as much as he could to try and read the notification. It was from Ogihci.
That was enough for Ichigo to rub his eyes open and open the text. What a wonderful gift to open to this holiday season.
Merry Christmas, Ichi!
I love you and I hope it's been a good one.
Ichigo smiled and texted back, hoping his text was coherent enough for Ogihci to understand. Merry Christmas, Shi! I love you too.
His thumb was over the send button, just hovering over it. For a second, he hesitated. He pressed it.
I miss you.
The reply was immediate.
I miss you too. It's hard not to. I think I can video call you soon.
Ichigo couldn't wait to see his lover's face again. He couldn't wait to hear his voice again.
The alarm went off on his phone. Groaning, he swiped his phone to turn it off. Today was Christmas and his family was going to be celebrating and so were his friends. Though he was going to participate in one event, he never stayed out late. He'd always return home so he could obsessively check his texts.
He'd always open up to his chat history with Ogihci. The last conversation was over two months ago and he had received no calls, no letters, no anything. But he always looked forward to Ogihci's text wishing him a happy Christmas. It was the most important and the most fun part of Christmas day.
So he stayed up so he could reply to it immediately. He waited for an hour. Then another. Then another. His eyes were getting tired and there was still nothing from Ogihci.
"Shi …"
He decided to take the initiative this time. Merry Christmas, Shi!
They always kept the read receipts on, so they know whenever they saw each other's texts. They agreed that they loved seeing it because it helped them know when the other was there. When they could pretend that they were physically still together.
But that didn't show up either. Ogihci never read his text. He never called. This was the first Christmas where he didn't say anything.
"Shiro, are you … that busy over there?" Ichigo talked out loud to absolutely no one. Was he too busy for him now?
And that was the day he cried himself to sleep.