I had to write a diary entry for English, and it had to be about Margaret. I absolutely loathe her, so I decided to make her a stupid bitch who has to memorize what she says from a card, no questions asked. Well, it's more of a monologue, as my English teacher pointed out (I know, I fail :p), but I had so much fun writing this! I know it's not good, and she is supposed to be extremely OOC.

Disclaimer: I don't own Much Ado About Nothing. If I did, Claudio would have died somewhere in the story and Hero would have married someone else who deserves her.

Dear Diary,

Wow! Today was such a weird day! Hah, not that it concerns me...right? Right? Maybe...*gasp* maybe it really does concern me! But, wait...what does the word 'concern' mean? Or the word 'maybe', for that matter...I guess they sound right...but I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY MEAN! This also goes for the word 'matter'...I like that word...gosh! I'm using so many words that don't make any sense!

Um...what does the word 'sense' mean? Anyway...

Yesterday, everything had begun. That simply gorgeous man, uhm...Borachio, I think his name is...isn't it? Oh, dear, I'm simply atrocious (whatever that means...it sounds bad) at remembering names! But, moving on...he'd told me about this simply charming plan! He'd said that all I had to do was to come to my mistress' balcony at night, wear said mistress' clothing and respond to the name 'Hero', which is my mistress' name. He'd also said that I should flirt (whatever that means...he'd just said that it meant that I had to talk like...like I wanted to see him, if you understand...) outrageously (again, such a big word...what the heck does it mean, really? All Borachio had said was that it meant a lot) with him, so I had. He had been impressed (whatever that means...he told me that it meant that he was proud of me), so impressed that he'd come up to my room to tell me how proud he was of me! I'd felt honoured; this was such a...a...privilege (he'd told me that that big word had meant that I deserved his presence, because I was special), and he'd told me repeatedly how proud of me he'd been.

That was yesterday. Today, however, was different!

This morning, I had gotten up, dressed, and opened the package on my dressing table; it was from Borachio, and in it were pages of paper with writing on it, along with explicit (Borachio had said in the letter that 'explicit' meant very, very, very detailed) instructions that said that I had to memorise the words on the paper extra-ordinarily (that means 'not ordinary'; I figured that out myself!) well for the wedding that was to take place today! I did so, and it took me ages to do it, but I finally did, knowing my dear Borachio would be distraught (I was told that that meant very, very, very upset) with me if I didn't.

Anyway, at the wedding, dear Hero was disgraced (it means, according to Borachio, that she was made to look very bad!) by that meanie Claudio...he claimed that she'd been conversing with someone else on the night before her wedding! And, that man had been Borachio!

But, I found that silly, seeing as Borachio had been talking with me at the time Hero had been said to have been out. Oh! That reminds me! Borachio and his friend, Conrad, have been arrested by the Watch! I can't believe that! I am in shock; what could my dear Borachio have done that would have made be seen as a bad person!?

After the whole wedding stuff-up, I had gone over to Benedick, who had been doing something with a piece of paper. He had implored me for advice on writing a song for his lady-friend, Beatrice, but I had said something else that had resulted in me not getting him to write a song for me that described my awesome beauty.

Oh, I forgot to mention...me, Hero and Ursula had decided to trick Beatrice into believing something...I can't remember, but it must have been boring and not fun at all, for I can't remember. Anyway, this happened before the stuff I mentioned in the above bits of writing, so it isn't as clear in my mind.

Well, that's all from me, until next time!

~Margaret

Yep, I really hate her. But, please don't flame! I'll accept any helpful criticism, though :p

~STEPHANO