"See you next meeting" Enjolras looked at Grantaire who was about to leave with the rest. "Not you Grantaire, I want to talk with you."
"Huh, okay..." he sat in his chair again, looking at Enjolras with a smirk.
The others left leaving them alone. Enjolras took a deep breath, passed his hand trough his face and sat in front of Grantaire.
"You need to stop."
"Stop what?" Grantaire was smirking but he was worried on the inside.
"The 'let's ignore Enjolras', the drinking. We talked about this before and you have ignored me again. Grantaire, unless you are here to help me with the revolution, you can leave" he looked at the other man, who was leaving the bottle of wine on the top of the table. "And when you do such thing, don't come back" his voice was revolted, angry... Disappointed. "Do you think this is easy? I'm trying to change the world, make it a better place and that is already very difficult by itself. And you... Just stand there, ignoring me, making it even harder than it already is!"
"I'm sorry..." the smirk was gone and now he had a guilty, sad, but also angry, look. "I had no idea Enjolras, okay? I'm sorry for everything. And I try to stop. Every single fucking day. I tried to stop drinking, you know? Because of you. But you just made me start all over again because of our 'discussions'."
The leader could barely look the other man in the eyes. He passed a hand through his hair and took a deep breath from his nose.
"Grantaire..."
"Look, if you're going to say something about how you just don't give a shit, thing that I know, just forget it" he said, leaving.
"Grantaire wait!" Enjolras shouted.
"What?!"
"Come over here, we need to have this conversation."
"Fine!" he walked toward his chair again and sat.
"One thing, that is all I'm asking you, stop. Grantaire, if you respect me, stop."
"No, you stop. I would be willing to die for you, you know? Kill for you."
"Isn't that what you're supposed to do?!"
"You know what? Forget it. Everything. I'm so sick of your hate. You have no idea how much it hurts" he felt his voice crack and made a great effort not to cry. "Being hated by someone you admire and love."
"What?"
"What what?"
"What did you say about me?"
"Oh, that I admire you."
"Not that, the last one."
"That was the last one."
"No, it wasn't."
"Yes, it was."
"No."
"Yes."
"Grantaire, tell the truth. Please."
"Okay, you'll hate me one way or another. I said I love you."
Enjolras felt his head hurt and sat down with his head in his lap and hands in his hair.
"Weird right? Hearing 'I love you' from the person you with all your soul."
"I do not hate you."
"Yeah right" he snorted to cover up the fact he was in the limit of being reduced to tears.
"It's true."
"I don't and never will believe you unless you say that to me in the eyes."
He left his head up to face Grantaire. His eyes were red and some tears were rolling down both his cheeks.
"Why are you crying Apollo?" he got closer to Enjolras, who heard concern and guilt in his voice.
"I'm so sorry I've hurt you. So sorry. I had no idea you loved me", he started to sob as he leaned on a hug. "Oh my g-god, I'm so, so sorry Grantaire."
"You didn't? Because everyone else saw it."
"I-I should rea-realized."
"Don't cry, Enjolras."
"I'm sorry" he wiped away his tears and drowned his face in Grantaire's chest. "I just thought you hated me... And I... I don't like when someone doesn't think the same..."
"I'm not following you" he replied, passing his hand through the blonde's hair.
"I... I sort of reply the feelings you have for me" he said, his voice being muffled by Grantaire's t-shirt. He heard Grantaire give a chuckle, it wasn't a light one, but a harmed one. "Why was that?"
"I just... I imagined you saying something like that a lot of times, and now that you are, I'm pretty sure it's the wine that's making me hear that."
"It's not."
"How can you be so sure? Tomorrow I'll wake up and you'll still hate me, I just know it."
"Shut up. It's not the wine. Believe me."
"I'd love to, I really would... But I just can't."
"I'm sure you can... I just have..."
"Have what?"
Before he could say anything else he felt Enjolras' lips against his. He thought he was dreaming, passed out on the floor again, but that seemed too real. What caused Enjolras to do what? That was the big question. But then there was another one, a smaller, but no less important, one: why was he thinking when he could be kissing him back. And that was what he did. He kissed him back soft and tenderly. When Enjolras finally pulled back, he did it slowly, his mind still around that. Grantaire looked at him and smiled.
"Do you still think it's the wine?"
"Not really... Buy there's this thing in my mind... Why would you do that?"
"I told I reply the feelings you have for me."
"Can you say it? I want to hear it from your mouth."
"I love you" it was whisper but it was enough to him.
