"Ohh!" said the group. "Kyle! You're okay!"
"Aha," Kyle Bojorquez laughed nervously. "Sorry for worrying everyone."
Dark Link "Yami" Avalon pat Dark Patrisha "Tamantha" Avalon-Henderson on the back a little too hard for her standards.
"Tamantha, you did it!" he praised. "You're great!"
"It's because of everyone that we were able to rescue Cousin Kyle," she said. "Thanks, chaps."
"Kyle, could you stay here for a while?" Dark Zelda "Shan" Gōjasu asked. "I'd really like to talk to you."
"Ah…" Kyle replied, unsure. "Um…"
"Umm…" Dark Patrisha said. "Sorry. We can't stay for long. We only dropped by because we were close to Hyrule. "Take some time for a break". That's what the king said. My two mates are back in that planet with the king. And so we… we can stay hereaboot close only."
"Oh," Dark Zelda frowned. "That's too bad."
"I promised I'd see Cousin Kyle safe, after all," Dark Patrisha said.
"I see," Dark Link said. "Hmm… Well…"
He noticed Dark Pit "Kuro" Sanchez, who was dragged to Hyrule against his will.
"Who is that?" Dark Link asked.
Dark Pit made no effort to respond, so Dark Patrisha responded for him.
"This is Kuro," Dark Patrisha smiled brightly. "He's my best mate."
"The friend you said you were trying to find?" Dark Link asked. "You found each other. That's great. I'm Yami. Nice to meet you."
Dark Link stuck his hand out for a handshake. Dark Pit, being Japanese, took great offense to the attempted contact and backed away from Dark Link.
"…Tappy," he sighed. "I'll be checking out the town. I'll come back when it's time to leave."
"Huh…" Dark Patrisha gasped. "K-row, wait–"
But Dark Pit was already gone. Dark Patrisha knew this wasn't going to end well with her older cousin.
"Hey…" Dark Link said, offended.
"Ahh…" Dark Patrisha sighed, face palming. "He's done it now."
"What's with him?!" Dark Link snapped. "What a horrible guy! Almost as annoying as Malon!"
"So-Sorry," Dark Patrisha stammered. "He's not normally fancy this…! He's really a stonking chap."
Dark Patrisha started to head off after him, but turned to Kyle before leaving.
"I wonder if he might be in a bad mood," she said. "I'm going after him for a tad. Cousin Kyle, yeh'll be staying here, right?"
"…Yeah," Kyle smiled.
"Then," Dark Patrisha smiled, running off. "See yeh later!"
She went after Dark Pit immediately. Kyle chuckled and couldn't stop smiling.
"Oh!" Dark Zelda smiled. "Later."
"…They're still the same," Kyle smiled.
"Huh?" Dark Link asked.
"The two of them have always been like this," Kyle explained. "Since a long time ago. Because they would always immediately go somewhere together."
-POINTLESS SCENE TRANSITION-
(Faron Woods)
"Kuro," Dark Patrisha snapped, following Dark Pit close behind. "Kuro! Oi!"
Dark Pit just kept walking, clearly having a destination in mind, and ignoring Dark Patrisha.
"Why are yeh acting fancy that?" she snapped. "Oi… are yeh even listening? Where are yeh going?! Oi, K-row…"
Dark Patrisha felt her heartbeat quicken upon arriving at where Dark Pit was going. She didn't know why it was so familiar.
A-Ah… she thought. A witch's house. This is where I spent a year sleeping…
She instantly wondered why Dark Pit was going through the gate.
"What business dae yeh hae here?" she asked. "I… I don't really fancy this gaff…"
"…You're right," Dark Pit agreed. "Me neither."
Dark Patrisha reacted with surprise when Dark Pit opened the gate.
"Then… let's go back," she said. "Why did yeh come here…? Answer me!"
Dark Pit said nothing as he entered the house, Dark Patrisha following closely. When they got to the Witch's Bedroom, Dark Pit faced the window. Dark Patrisha stood by the table.
"…Why follow me?" Dark Pit asked. "Wasn't it great to be together with them? You wanted to see them, didn't you?"
"…Well," Dark Patrisha answered, annoyed. "Yeh see…"
Such a harsh tone. Dark Patrisha thought. Kuro really seems angry… But why?
Dark Patrisha felt something move beneath her hand. She turned around and picked it up.
"…a picture?" she asked, finally noticing the drawings around the room.
If I squiz carefully. she thought. In the middle… This is… the thingamajig I was inside… and… Kuro? Why…?
Dark Pit snatched the picture from Dark Patrisha before anything else happened.
"Ah," she said. "Kuro…"
Dark Pit looked at the picture with a sigh.
"…What is that?" Dark Patrisha asked.
"…My punishment," Dark Pit answered.
Dark Patrisha was confused by his answer.
"Wha…" she asked. "…Punishment?"
Dark Pit nodded.
"One year ago, I betrayed you," he explained. "And called the Darkness and destroyed Smashville. …This is in compensation. While you spent the year sleeping, I spent it trapping the Darkness inside my body. The Darkness that Master Riku said to never give into. That was what I had planned to do, but…"
"But then yeh went down the exact same path," Dark Patrisha finished, understanding. "But yeh've also turned to normal… We can talk fancy this again, so it's okay. Punishment or not, yeh've already paid the price. No more… It's already dooze…"
"And by doing that, I'm immediately forgiven?" Dark Pit questioned. "Tappy… That's why I came here. Unassumingly. It serves as a reminder. If I come here, I remember the regret, the humiliation… Tappy…"
Dark Patrisha felt her heartbeat speed up in anxiety.
"Even if this battle is over," he said. "We can't be together–"
Dark Patrisha silenced him immediately, placing her hand over his mouth.
"Wh…" she stammered. "What are yeh trying to say? It's dooze already. K-row, yeh've already been through so much. When everything is over, we'll go back together. But even so, why…? …I won't allow this!"
"Tappy," Dark Pit said, grabbing her by the chin, forcing her to look at him. "Listen. Someday, I will most certainly repeat the same thing again."
"Again by the Darkness…?" she asked. "If it's yeh, yeh'll be fine…"
"Wrong," Dark Pit said. "You don't understand anything. It's a simpler matter."
Dark Patrisha gave him a confused look, trying to understand.
"It's you, Tap," he said. "I get irritated when you're close to anyone other than me. I can't relax until you look at only me. …Well, what do you think I should do? That's the reason I brought you to another planet. I won't hesitate to open the door. No sooner have I returned that it's happened again. That's all I thought about when I returned to Smashville. The result is the same as it was a year ago. So, since the beginning…"
"K-row…" she muttered. "Yeh…"
Dark Patrisha began to tremble with anger.
"Tappy?" Dark Pit asked, confused.
"Yeh moronic retard!" Dark Patrisha yelled. "Yeh're saying those irresponsible things by yourself again!"
Dark Pit was certain that she had ruined his hearing for the most part.
"Ow…" Dark Pit groaned. "My head."
"Before yeh think of doing that, tell me!" she ordered. "…Why dae yeh never listen to me?! Does this really make it the same as a year ago?!"
Dark Patrisha began crying, feeling guilty about Dark Pit going against his master's orders.
"But back then," she said, tears falling from her eyes. "If I'd been able to talk to yeh a tad more, to pay more attention to yeh… I hae always wanted to… a- apologise to yeh…"
Dark Pit looked at her, giving her his full attention. Why would SHE need to apologize? She was the one who corrected his mistakes.
"Don't ignore what I say…" Dark Patrisha sobbed, looking up at him. "And make all these decisions by yourself… When all I wanna dae is go wherever yeh go! If yeh leave me behind, I'll catch up… I don't wanna be left behind. Not again."
Dark Pit looked at her before face palming.
"Dammit…" he sighed. "…This is why you…"
Dark Patrisha gave him a look of confusion.
"…For whose sake I'm controlling myself for…?" Dark Pit said. "As usual, a complete moronic retard."
"Wh-What did yeh say?!" she snapped.
Dark Patrisha took offense to this, but calmed down shortly after.
"…That's right, I'm a moronic retard," she said. "If yeh don't tell me, I won't understand…"
"…Maybe I'm a moronic retard, too," Dark Pit said, pulling Dark Patrisha close to him.
He flipped them around so that Dark Patrisha was pinned against the wall.
"…Even though I know the kind of Werewolf you are…" he said.
"Wha…" Dark Patrisha asked.
Dark Pit kissed her, cutting her off. Dark Patrisha didn't know what to do for a moment, but started kissing him back. Their tongues collided, tasting each other slowly, but carefully. They slowly pulled away, being connected by their conjoined saliva.
They shared a hug with each other, both finally able to relax.
"It's been so long, I'd nearly forgotten," Dark Patrisha said. "Glaikit Kuro…"
-POINTLESS SCENE TRANSITION-
(Later That Day)
Dark Pit and Dark Patrisha were heading back to Hyrule to pick up Kyle.
"…We're pretty tardy," Dark Patrisha said. "I wonder if Cousin Kyle and Yami are worried."
I wonder what excuse we should give. she thought.
"Tch," Dark Pit replied.
"Ah, I heard that!" Dark Patrisha snapped. "Yeh just made a noise, didn't yeh?! Why dae yeh hae a problem with em?!"
"I told you," Dark Pit replied. "I get irritated when you're close to others. I don't like you getting all buddy-buddy with them."
Dark Patrisha finally understood.
"What?" she giggled. "Jealous?"
"Perhaps," Dark Pit answered. "In the end, it was just a quick visit. We couldn't stay?"
"Hm…" Dark Patrisha replied. "…Not really."
Dark Patrisha climbed on top of the railing next to them.
"If you think about walking," Dark Pit said. "A visit isn't… bad."
"Isn't bad at all," Dark Patrisha agreed.
"Tappy?" Dark Pit said.
"Hm?" she replied, not well-balanced on the railing.
"Don't forget what you said," Dark Pit said, taking her hand to keep her balanced. "I'm serious. Now that I think about it, it certainly wasn't futile was it? Let's finish everything quickly."
Dark Patrisha gave him a look.
Ahh, he's finally motivated. Dark Patrisha thought. Crap… What a rush… Well… never mind.
Dark Pit helped her get down from the railing and smirked.
"I'll cop a fizzy drink since there's no ice cream here," Dark Patrisha said.
"Brilliant idea," Dark Pit smirked. "It's alright if you're serious, but I won't spoil you…"
-POINTLESS SCENE TRANSITION-
(Meanwhile)
"They're late, aren't they?" Dark Zelda asked.
"Yeah," Kyle answered. "They're dorks after all."
"Are you gonna go looking for them?" Dark Link asked.
"Nah," Kyle answered. "They haven't seen each other in a long time. They must have a lot to say to each other. Right now, they must be…"
Kyle crushed his soda can, realization dawning on him. Dark Link and Dark Zelda jumped at the sudden action.
They're having sex! he thought.