Hehehe! I'M BAAAAACCKKK!!!!!! Finally I got over the fact that I have a hard time on non-partner fics! Well, I saw a really funny fic called Codes Of Conduct, by Kawaii Frob. I is sooooo funny! Well, I decided I would try it myself, so what I did was I gathered all the stupid, pointless rumors I could find and figured out a way to link them all together. Get ready for the stupidest thing this side of the universe!
The miracle code
Ever wished you could bring back Aeris? She had some of the greatest limit breaks ever! Well, I not only have a code to revive her, but I can also get you a bunch of new characters, and turn Sephiroth nice, all in the process!
Okie-dokie! First trash your old game. That's right. Delete it! You gotta start from scratch. Ok, when you pay through and finally get to the part where you see the sick guy in the tunnel, let Aeris care for him a bit. His friend, named General, will see that you are caring, but the guy still dies. Oh well. You make friends with the General and leave after he says "If you ever need anything, just come to me." He will give you a Sephiroth Statue before you go. (Also, make sure you answer all the questions right while in Midgar. You will know you answered them all right when Aeris begins talking to you about her first love, Zack. This will happen right before the flashback in Kalm. Tifa will mention something about a half-dead guy near Midgar.)
Ok, now play through till you get to Junon. The only thing you gotta remember here is to get those two 1/35 soldier thingies. Then, when you get to the golden saucer, choose Aeris to come with you. Play through as normal and get Cait Sith. Then go to the roller coaster game and get 10 more soldiers, the masamune blade, and the super sweeper.
Go back to Wonder Square and use the fortune telling machine until you find a ticket with a weird answer. Play though as usual until you get to the prison. Sleep in the truck near the elevator guys place (You know, where the two guards are) 10 times, then walk up to the guards. One will say, "You sure must have been tired. You remind me of a weird little kid I once saw laying in a herd of chocobos." Remember this info. This "Weird little kid" will soon be joining your party!
Race the chocobos and all that good stuff until you finally win and get the buggy. Go to the chocobo tracks and equip the chocobo lure materia. Walk around till you get into a fight screen with two chocobos and a kid that looks like a clown. He will say "Leave my chocobos alone!" Say back, "I love chocobos" and the screen will switch (Like with Yuffie). He will then ask you 29 questions. The answers are all "Yes". He will ask them randomly each time you play, but don't be fooled. Once you answer all of his stupid questions he will tell you that he is J. Juggler and will join your party. He will also give you your second Sephiroth statue.
Ok, Now go to the Gongaga reactor with the Masamune Blade and Super Sweeper. After the whole thing with Scarlet ends, get The materia in there and a cutscene will play. Barret will run out (Even if he isn't in your party at the time) and start talking about the Super Sweeper. Suddenly, for no apparent reason, the reactor will blow up again and you will be knocked out. When you come to you will see Aeris and Zack talking. Zack will leave, but you'll see him again.
Ok, play though as normal until cloud is out of his coma and everything is fine and dandy. Now it's time for all the real secrets to be revealed! First off go to the myrthril mines again and walk around tapping the O button. You should find 4 more Sephiroth statues lying around in there. You should now have 6. Just 2 more to go!
Go to Bone Village and find the Midgar key. Return there and got to Aeris' church. If you've been really nice to her the whole game she will say, "I want to come back and help you defeat Sephiroth. If only someone could help us...." There's your clue to talk to General!
He will say, "What happened to that pretty flower girl?" A cutscene will play where they sit down in his friends old place and they will talk about what happened. General will say, "There is a way you can help her. But you have to get back into the underwater castle." You then leave, but you can't do much of anything yet. Breed your chocobos until you get the gold one, then kill all the weapons. Don't take any of the Items to the man though. You will need them. Level up all three Bahamuts until they are masters and go to bone village with the earth harp. Tell the guy you want normal treasure and place one man near the entrance to the sleeping forest. When he points there, make him dig and you will receive the "Bahamut Soul" Materia. No one in your party can use it yet, but hold on to it.
Take the guide book to the City of the Ancients and sleep in the place with the beds. Cloud will wake up in the middle of the night and begin reading the book. He will notice a part that says "Somewhere beneath the waters is a large sea serpent, even more incredible than the great leviathan!" In the morning cloud will state to his group "We need to find this large serpent. I have a feeling..... that somehow it can help us."
Go back to the entrance of Aeris' home and talk to the little boy standing there. He will say "Just recently I have been hearing a strange grumbling coming from inside the flower lady's church. Sounds almost like something is hungry in there!" Go to Wall Market and buy a plate of food. It doesn't matter which one. You'll get a new choice now. "For here" Or "To go" Choose "To go" and take the plate of food to the church. Go up into the rafters and you will see a baby dragon perched there, moaning. Feed it and it will suddenly turn into a boy. For your kindness he gives you another Sephiroth statue and Joins your party. This is Ryu, and he is the only one who can use the "Bahamut Soul" materia. It causes him to change into Bahamut and lets him use really cool magic.
Now get onto the Highwind and go to Goblin Island. Run around until you find a Goblin that is a lot bigger than the others. This is Baakusa, another new party member. He gets mad because you are attacking his friends and tells you he's gonna teach you some manners. Fight him for a while, then her starts running in circles like a moron and finally gives up. After that he joins your party.
Now it's time to find this mysterious "Sea serpent". Take the desert rose and enter the desert prison again. Dio will let you in only because you have the rose, and if you turn it over to the calm traveler he won't let you back in. Talk to the three stupid lying guys and they will say the following:
"No one can breed a silver chocobo."
"There is no chocobo that can survive underwater"
"Not even a sea creature can move that giant fish"
Talk to everyone else and then sleep in the truck again. Cloud will dream of a giant Leviathan-looking creature, and Aeris will say, "Only he can help us..." In the morning, leave and go to the traveler in Kalm. Turn over all the items and get your rewards from him, then go to the chocobo sage. He will deny that he knows anything about a Silver Chocobo, Then cloud sees a picture of the sage petting one. Finally he will tell you to mate two Gold S class chocobos and use a Sahara nut.
Once you have your silver chocobo, put Ryu and Vincent on your team. Equip the underwater materia and ride the chocobo underwater until you find a small cave. Try to go in and the rocks start to crumble, revealing Alpha-Leviathan. He's only about as tough as Diablos on FF8, so he isn't much of a problem. For defeating him you get an Alpha-Leviathan Materia, a Sephiroth Statue, and Access to the cave. Inside is a materia that is even better than HP Plus. 9999 HP Materia!
Ok, now to get Aeris! Go to the place with Mr. Fish. An FMV begins as soon as you approach it. Alpha-Leviathan suddenly comes up from below and eats the fish, leaving the stairs free. The FMV continues as everyone runs down the stairs and Cloud dives into the water after the white materia. When he resurfaces the materia breaks into little pieces and Aeris is brought back. Also, another creature appears. This is yet another new character, Holy Spirit. She only has one ability, "Loving touch" and it automatically heals everyone.
You're almost done! We only have one more character to get! Go to the Nibelhiem mansion and look around for a poster that looks really strange. Read it and Red XIII will appear, saying that there is a strange sound coming from behind the paper. He will bust through it, revealing a secret passage. Go down and you will encounter a strange shadow. It will fight you, and 2 of your characters are guaranteed to die, but don't worry. Holy Spirit will suddenly emerge and seeing this the shadow becomes a grim reaper-looking creature and stops fighting. Holy Spirit will heal everyone, including Shadow Guy, and then Shadow Guy will say "I had no idea you were free Holy! Please, may I join your noble quest?" Say no and Tifa slaps you in the head for being mean. Say yes and Barret slaps you in the head for not asking everyone for their thoughts on the matter. Either way you get slapped, and either way he still joins your team. This guy is called Death Spirit.
Now comes the problem. Since you defeated the weapons, a new set has arisen. Two to be precise. Turquoise and Brown weapons. To fight turquoise weapon you need the Tiny Bronco back. But how do I do that? Siiimmmmmppllleeeee!!!! Put Cid in your party throughout all of this. Go win another Super Sweeper and go to Junon. Talk to everyone in lower Junon 3 times. Then a new guy will appear from a house. Talk to him and he'll say, "You know, with a Super Sweeper you can fix almost anything." Cid will then realize that he can make repairs on his craft, and you are then taken back to the Highwind. Go to Rocket Town and he will begin repairs.
Sleep in the inn and Cid will come out in the morning and tell you he is done. Unfortunately the thing burns up again and can only handle shallow water. That's Ok! That's what you need it to do! First of all, you need a really powerful sword, and Ultima Weapon just won't cut it in this fight. Level up Knights of the Round and keep dividing it till you have 8 mastered KotR. Put all 8 in Ultima weapon and get into another fight. At the start of the fight the sword will start glowing and suddenly become Excalibur. It does 15,000-20,000 damage!! Now put Aeris and Vincent on your team and float around in shallow water till you find a little blue thing floating around (Like Ruby Weapon) Bump into it and start the fight. Defeat it and you will get a Turquoise Chocobo. It can do pretty much what a Silver one can do. Why get it? Who knows? It's fun to almost get pounded into oblivion for a chocobo that does pretty much what another one does!
Ok, now go back to the Highwind and start crashing into all the mountains. One of them is the brown weapon. He's a real pushover, and when you beat him all your characters will instantly level up to 99! Yay for you!
Now go about your business until you reach the northern crater. Go in and open ONLY the first two chests. Then leave, stick Vinny-chan in your party, and swing back over to Lucrecias cave. When you step in Vinny will begin to shake violently, and suddenly you will have to fight a creature called Vincent's Soul. It has over one Million HP, but when you defeat it you will get clouds secret limit break, the Cherry Blossom! It's like Omnislash but is prettier O.o
Now to tuns Sephy nice again! Go to the sleeping guy and give him the set of 1/35 soldiers. He will give you a hint. "Go to Junon and talk to the sailor. He has something pretty interesting." First spend all your cash so you have 0 and go to Kalm. Talk to the big clock and you will receive an Infinite Money Card. Now go talk to the guy in upper Junon (Have Tifa and Aeris on your party) and he will say, "I have a really great materia here. Very, very rare and powerful. I'll give it to you for 1,000,000 gil and 2 kisses from the girls." Give him what he wants and he hands over the "Super nova" materia!
Go now To the crater. You will run into Zack again. He will join your team and then help you fight Sephiroth. When he becomes Safer Sephy, use Super Nova on him and he will pause the battle. The following dialog will commence:
Seph: So you can summon the power of the cosmos as well!
Cloud: That's right. We can't let you destroy the planet!
Zack: Why is it you feel you must destroy us all anyway?
Seph: Because I want love! I want someone to care about me! If I can't get it by normal means, I will force people to care! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
(You now have the chance to decide. "Commence battle" or "display Sephy statue collection" Choose the second)
Cloud: If no one cared, why would someone have made these?
Seph: *Stares at figures* Those are...... Statues of me?
Tifa: That's right. We don't want to kill you. We know that this is not your fault. Please let us be your friend, so we
can help you.
Seph: *Slowly changes back to his human body, he takes the
statues in his arms* But meteor.....
*Holy and Death Spirits appear* We shall stop it!
Holy and Death Spirits shoot out of the crater and collide head first with the meteor, blowing it to chunks!
Now we just have to watch the alternate ending! They leave the crater, and land in the field, and Suddenly a girl just younger than Sephiroth runs up to him and hugs him. (Shameless self insertion!) Everyone watches as the flaming chunks of meteor fall away from the planet in all directions, completely harmless, and everyone begins to sing "In The End" By Linkin Park.
THE END!!!
Well, this was a totally useless fic! Scary enough, all of the things above are rumored to be true. I even found a rumor about a so-called "Cheese Weapon" O.o Definitely strange. Well, next chapter, I'm gonna give a rundown of each new characters Limit breaks. By the way, don't give me stupid flames saying "Sucks" Or "Really stupid". Give me a valid reason why. Yes, this fic was stupid and pointless beyond all reasoning. It was intended to be that way. This code does not work, but it would be really cute if it did. I like Kawaii Frob's story better though. Much funnier than mine. Whatever, hoped you found it somewhat entertaining.
The miracle code
Ever wished you could bring back Aeris? She had some of the greatest limit breaks ever! Well, I not only have a code to revive her, but I can also get you a bunch of new characters, and turn Sephiroth nice, all in the process!
Okie-dokie! First trash your old game. That's right. Delete it! You gotta start from scratch. Ok, when you pay through and finally get to the part where you see the sick guy in the tunnel, let Aeris care for him a bit. His friend, named General, will see that you are caring, but the guy still dies. Oh well. You make friends with the General and leave after he says "If you ever need anything, just come to me." He will give you a Sephiroth Statue before you go. (Also, make sure you answer all the questions right while in Midgar. You will know you answered them all right when Aeris begins talking to you about her first love, Zack. This will happen right before the flashback in Kalm. Tifa will mention something about a half-dead guy near Midgar.)
Ok, now play through till you get to Junon. The only thing you gotta remember here is to get those two 1/35 soldier thingies. Then, when you get to the golden saucer, choose Aeris to come with you. Play through as normal and get Cait Sith. Then go to the roller coaster game and get 10 more soldiers, the masamune blade, and the super sweeper.
Go back to Wonder Square and use the fortune telling machine until you find a ticket with a weird answer. Play though as usual until you get to the prison. Sleep in the truck near the elevator guys place (You know, where the two guards are) 10 times, then walk up to the guards. One will say, "You sure must have been tired. You remind me of a weird little kid I once saw laying in a herd of chocobos." Remember this info. This "Weird little kid" will soon be joining your party!
Race the chocobos and all that good stuff until you finally win and get the buggy. Go to the chocobo tracks and equip the chocobo lure materia. Walk around till you get into a fight screen with two chocobos and a kid that looks like a clown. He will say "Leave my chocobos alone!" Say back, "I love chocobos" and the screen will switch (Like with Yuffie). He will then ask you 29 questions. The answers are all "Yes". He will ask them randomly each time you play, but don't be fooled. Once you answer all of his stupid questions he will tell you that he is J. Juggler and will join your party. He will also give you your second Sephiroth statue.
Ok, Now go to the Gongaga reactor with the Masamune Blade and Super Sweeper. After the whole thing with Scarlet ends, get The materia in there and a cutscene will play. Barret will run out (Even if he isn't in your party at the time) and start talking about the Super Sweeper. Suddenly, for no apparent reason, the reactor will blow up again and you will be knocked out. When you come to you will see Aeris and Zack talking. Zack will leave, but you'll see him again.
Ok, play though as normal until cloud is out of his coma and everything is fine and dandy. Now it's time for all the real secrets to be revealed! First off go to the myrthril mines again and walk around tapping the O button. You should find 4 more Sephiroth statues lying around in there. You should now have 6. Just 2 more to go!
Go to Bone Village and find the Midgar key. Return there and got to Aeris' church. If you've been really nice to her the whole game she will say, "I want to come back and help you defeat Sephiroth. If only someone could help us...." There's your clue to talk to General!
He will say, "What happened to that pretty flower girl?" A cutscene will play where they sit down in his friends old place and they will talk about what happened. General will say, "There is a way you can help her. But you have to get back into the underwater castle." You then leave, but you can't do much of anything yet. Breed your chocobos until you get the gold one, then kill all the weapons. Don't take any of the Items to the man though. You will need them. Level up all three Bahamuts until they are masters and go to bone village with the earth harp. Tell the guy you want normal treasure and place one man near the entrance to the sleeping forest. When he points there, make him dig and you will receive the "Bahamut Soul" Materia. No one in your party can use it yet, but hold on to it.
Take the guide book to the City of the Ancients and sleep in the place with the beds. Cloud will wake up in the middle of the night and begin reading the book. He will notice a part that says "Somewhere beneath the waters is a large sea serpent, even more incredible than the great leviathan!" In the morning cloud will state to his group "We need to find this large serpent. I have a feeling..... that somehow it can help us."
Go back to the entrance of Aeris' home and talk to the little boy standing there. He will say "Just recently I have been hearing a strange grumbling coming from inside the flower lady's church. Sounds almost like something is hungry in there!" Go to Wall Market and buy a plate of food. It doesn't matter which one. You'll get a new choice now. "For here" Or "To go" Choose "To go" and take the plate of food to the church. Go up into the rafters and you will see a baby dragon perched there, moaning. Feed it and it will suddenly turn into a boy. For your kindness he gives you another Sephiroth statue and Joins your party. This is Ryu, and he is the only one who can use the "Bahamut Soul" materia. It causes him to change into Bahamut and lets him use really cool magic.
Now get onto the Highwind and go to Goblin Island. Run around until you find a Goblin that is a lot bigger than the others. This is Baakusa, another new party member. He gets mad because you are attacking his friends and tells you he's gonna teach you some manners. Fight him for a while, then her starts running in circles like a moron and finally gives up. After that he joins your party.
Now it's time to find this mysterious "Sea serpent". Take the desert rose and enter the desert prison again. Dio will let you in only because you have the rose, and if you turn it over to the calm traveler he won't let you back in. Talk to the three stupid lying guys and they will say the following:
"No one can breed a silver chocobo."
"There is no chocobo that can survive underwater"
"Not even a sea creature can move that giant fish"
Talk to everyone else and then sleep in the truck again. Cloud will dream of a giant Leviathan-looking creature, and Aeris will say, "Only he can help us..." In the morning, leave and go to the traveler in Kalm. Turn over all the items and get your rewards from him, then go to the chocobo sage. He will deny that he knows anything about a Silver Chocobo, Then cloud sees a picture of the sage petting one. Finally he will tell you to mate two Gold S class chocobos and use a Sahara nut.
Once you have your silver chocobo, put Ryu and Vincent on your team. Equip the underwater materia and ride the chocobo underwater until you find a small cave. Try to go in and the rocks start to crumble, revealing Alpha-Leviathan. He's only about as tough as Diablos on FF8, so he isn't much of a problem. For defeating him you get an Alpha-Leviathan Materia, a Sephiroth Statue, and Access to the cave. Inside is a materia that is even better than HP Plus. 9999 HP Materia!
Ok, now to get Aeris! Go to the place with Mr. Fish. An FMV begins as soon as you approach it. Alpha-Leviathan suddenly comes up from below and eats the fish, leaving the stairs free. The FMV continues as everyone runs down the stairs and Cloud dives into the water after the white materia. When he resurfaces the materia breaks into little pieces and Aeris is brought back. Also, another creature appears. This is yet another new character, Holy Spirit. She only has one ability, "Loving touch" and it automatically heals everyone.
You're almost done! We only have one more character to get! Go to the Nibelhiem mansion and look around for a poster that looks really strange. Read it and Red XIII will appear, saying that there is a strange sound coming from behind the paper. He will bust through it, revealing a secret passage. Go down and you will encounter a strange shadow. It will fight you, and 2 of your characters are guaranteed to die, but don't worry. Holy Spirit will suddenly emerge and seeing this the shadow becomes a grim reaper-looking creature and stops fighting. Holy Spirit will heal everyone, including Shadow Guy, and then Shadow Guy will say "I had no idea you were free Holy! Please, may I join your noble quest?" Say no and Tifa slaps you in the head for being mean. Say yes and Barret slaps you in the head for not asking everyone for their thoughts on the matter. Either way you get slapped, and either way he still joins your team. This guy is called Death Spirit.
Now comes the problem. Since you defeated the weapons, a new set has arisen. Two to be precise. Turquoise and Brown weapons. To fight turquoise weapon you need the Tiny Bronco back. But how do I do that? Siiimmmmmppllleeeee!!!! Put Cid in your party throughout all of this. Go win another Super Sweeper and go to Junon. Talk to everyone in lower Junon 3 times. Then a new guy will appear from a house. Talk to him and he'll say, "You know, with a Super Sweeper you can fix almost anything." Cid will then realize that he can make repairs on his craft, and you are then taken back to the Highwind. Go to Rocket Town and he will begin repairs.
Sleep in the inn and Cid will come out in the morning and tell you he is done. Unfortunately the thing burns up again and can only handle shallow water. That's Ok! That's what you need it to do! First of all, you need a really powerful sword, and Ultima Weapon just won't cut it in this fight. Level up Knights of the Round and keep dividing it till you have 8 mastered KotR. Put all 8 in Ultima weapon and get into another fight. At the start of the fight the sword will start glowing and suddenly become Excalibur. It does 15,000-20,000 damage!! Now put Aeris and Vincent on your team and float around in shallow water till you find a little blue thing floating around (Like Ruby Weapon) Bump into it and start the fight. Defeat it and you will get a Turquoise Chocobo. It can do pretty much what a Silver one can do. Why get it? Who knows? It's fun to almost get pounded into oblivion for a chocobo that does pretty much what another one does!
Ok, now go back to the Highwind and start crashing into all the mountains. One of them is the brown weapon. He's a real pushover, and when you beat him all your characters will instantly level up to 99! Yay for you!
Now go about your business until you reach the northern crater. Go in and open ONLY the first two chests. Then leave, stick Vinny-chan in your party, and swing back over to Lucrecias cave. When you step in Vinny will begin to shake violently, and suddenly you will have to fight a creature called Vincent's Soul. It has over one Million HP, but when you defeat it you will get clouds secret limit break, the Cherry Blossom! It's like Omnislash but is prettier O.o
Now to tuns Sephy nice again! Go to the sleeping guy and give him the set of 1/35 soldiers. He will give you a hint. "Go to Junon and talk to the sailor. He has something pretty interesting." First spend all your cash so you have 0 and go to Kalm. Talk to the big clock and you will receive an Infinite Money Card. Now go talk to the guy in upper Junon (Have Tifa and Aeris on your party) and he will say, "I have a really great materia here. Very, very rare and powerful. I'll give it to you for 1,000,000 gil and 2 kisses from the girls." Give him what he wants and he hands over the "Super nova" materia!
Go now To the crater. You will run into Zack again. He will join your team and then help you fight Sephiroth. When he becomes Safer Sephy, use Super Nova on him and he will pause the battle. The following dialog will commence:
Seph: So you can summon the power of the cosmos as well!
Cloud: That's right. We can't let you destroy the planet!
Zack: Why is it you feel you must destroy us all anyway?
Seph: Because I want love! I want someone to care about me! If I can't get it by normal means, I will force people to care! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
(You now have the chance to decide. "Commence battle" or "display Sephy statue collection" Choose the second)
Cloud: If no one cared, why would someone have made these?
Seph: *Stares at figures* Those are...... Statues of me?
Tifa: That's right. We don't want to kill you. We know that this is not your fault. Please let us be your friend, so we
can help you.
Seph: *Slowly changes back to his human body, he takes the
statues in his arms* But meteor.....
*Holy and Death Spirits appear* We shall stop it!
Holy and Death Spirits shoot out of the crater and collide head first with the meteor, blowing it to chunks!
Now we just have to watch the alternate ending! They leave the crater, and land in the field, and Suddenly a girl just younger than Sephiroth runs up to him and hugs him. (Shameless self insertion!) Everyone watches as the flaming chunks of meteor fall away from the planet in all directions, completely harmless, and everyone begins to sing "In The End" By Linkin Park.
THE END!!!
Well, this was a totally useless fic! Scary enough, all of the things above are rumored to be true. I even found a rumor about a so-called "Cheese Weapon" O.o Definitely strange. Well, next chapter, I'm gonna give a rundown of each new characters Limit breaks. By the way, don't give me stupid flames saying "Sucks" Or "Really stupid". Give me a valid reason why. Yes, this fic was stupid and pointless beyond all reasoning. It was intended to be that way. This code does not work, but it would be really cute if it did. I like Kawaii Frob's story better though. Much funnier than mine. Whatever, hoped you found it somewhat entertaining.