Life in the Grey
Author: Hex
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Standard
Note: Who's feeling introspective today? ME! The inner feelings of a Vampire *Grin* fun!
Note: To readers of TSA. I am sorry PT 13 is taking so long, it's at that stage where I open the document, look at it and groan. Sorry.
Dedication: Cal again, this is guilt writing for not doing anymore Buffy for him recently.
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What was it about rejection which always seemed to pull these beasts of the heart? The ones which made you feel like tearing a hole in reality and crawling into that non-space and hiding?
What was is about rejection which always seemed to pull those beasts of the soul? The ones which made you want to tearing into the soul of a man and rip away what makes him human?
What was it about rejection which always seemed to pull those beasts of the mind? The ones which made you want to tear into the flesh of a woman and rip away her still beating heart?
It was not even rejection which brought those inner demons now. Now it was the sheer need to tear into something, anything, to quell that passion and anger. To kill that shadow of humanity within you. That shadow which once felt good things. It had to die as you had died.
Was it the glory of feeling their blood on your hands?
Was it the pleasure of knowing you made more of mankind suffer as your twisted replica of a soul suffered?
Was it the need to do something, anything, to make yourself feel animated again?
Was it the need to try to recapture your sunlight?
Or was it the need to take theirs which drove you?
Some say it is the hunger but I feel no hunger.
All I feel is the need to feel alive again!
Please, by all the demons and creatures of the night, choose for me, life or death? Am I to live or die or am I to be stuck here in this limbo between never ending void and the sun I miss so much?
I crave the kiss of light as I crave the kiss of the blood.
I want my kills to kiss me as they die, to thank me for I do not give them this grey life.
Life in the grey...It is no life...It is no death...It is no ending and no beginning...
Eternity is not black as night or as white as the sun.
Eternity is grey.
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*Blinks* Ok, not sure where this one came from....I have to much spare time and writers block makes my head hurt!
Laters
Hex.