Title: Think Of Me
Disclaimer: C.S. Lewis owns the original works. Walden Media and Disney own the movie version, which I have based this little drabble on. Also, credits to Andrew Lloyd Webber who composed and wrote lyrics to the song 'Think Of Me' from the Phantom of the Opera. That's where the title came from.
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"Why don't you hold onto it? You might need to call me again."
She had been slightly flirting.
He remembered that moment she had said this. Caspian had been planning to give back her magical horn, but she had told him to keep it. They shared a moment of silence. Caspian was reluctant to let her and her youngest sister ride off into the woods to find Aslan. Without another word, he did not give her the horn. As she and Queen Lucy departed, his mind was made up.
He would follow her after a few brief moments.
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"It wouldn't have worked out anyway."
Her eyes told him this long before she had said this.
He had known before her tender kiss goodbye.
She and her brother, High King Peter was discussing something with Aslan the Great Lion. Caspian, now crowned the new Telmarine King of Narnia, had approached them with great respect. She had been the second person to look up at him. She was saddened.
Somewhere deep inside, so was he.
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The land of Narnia was in good hands. There was no doubt about that, but was their king? After performing his kingly duties, Caspian retired to his chambers regardless of the time of day. Only his professor, Reepicheep the mouse knight and high-ranked members of his Royal Guard could enter his chambers, but today was one of those days when they left him alone.
He sat at the edge of his bed. Caspian did not speak as he held the magical horn in his hands. He had never given it back to her. It was hers, given to her by Aslan himself when she ruled as a queen in ages past. He was tempted to put it to his lips, draw a breath and blow the magical instrument. His hands were shaking.
After running his left hand through his dark hair, he covered half his face.
He remembered her words. "It wouldn't have worked out anyway."
That didn't mean people couldn't dream. Caspian wondered what could have happened if she could have stayed. Would she be his? Would she be a dear friend? Either way, Caspian would love her with different connotations. He let out a sigh. He would never know how things might have been, only what they are now.
She was not in Narnia. She would not come back. Blowing the horn was futile. Realizing this, he stood and placed the horn at his nightstand. Caspian pulled off his shirt and lay down on his cold bed. He didn't care if it was mid-afternoon. He wanted to sleep. Everything exhausted him.
He wanted to dream.
"Queen Susan…" He muttered.
He saw her in his sleep. Just like he wanted.
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"Good luck."
"Thanks."
"Look. Maybe it's time you had this back."
"Why don't you hold onto it? You might need to call me again."
The conversation played in his head once more. If only she could have stayed in Narnia. It was still pitch-black but he saw her standing before him. She looked as radiant as ever. She appeared the way he had last remembered her. Her brown hair was in curls down to her shoulders. She was wearing a gown that left her shoulders and neckline bare. Then, the words shifted into a different conversation they had.
"I'm glad I came back."
"I wish we had more time together."
"It wouldn't have worked anyway."
"Why not?"
"I am 1,300 years older than you."
Susan took a step back, but Caspian drew closer to her. His hand gently caressed her soft cheek. She flinched at his touch, but later grew used to it. Then, Caspian drew her into an embrace. His face buried in her hair.
"It doesn't matter." He breathed. Within his embrace, Susan shuddered but wrapped her arms around him. Something was coming over him. Caspian inhaled her scent. Before he could stop himself, he began leaving kisses on her shoulder, catching her off guard. He loved how sweet she tasted. Moving up her collar bone, Caspian kept going until he reached her mouth. He had found bliss in that moment.
It was much like that kiss she gave him before she departed. Unexpected. Rather rushed.
She would not let him stop. Susan kissed back. Caspian could have sworn she had said his name in their kiss. He didn't want this to end.
But it wasn't meant to be.
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Caspian awoke with a start. The kiss was still fresh in his mind, but he knew he had been dreaming. He closed his eyes and let out a long sigh. He shook his head. It wasn't meant to be.
He needed to accept it now.
But even for a king, accepting some kind of loss was a hard thing to do.