Greetings All! After the New Directions lost at Sectionals, I was wracking my brain to try to come up with how they would get back in the competition, and this was one of best (and favorite) guesses. Even though they revealed this past week that they decided to go in a different direction, I decided to write up my idea as a full-fledged story and inflict it upon the world.

You're welcome.

Full disclosure: I don't own Glee, but I love it to pieces and had an obscene amount of fun writing this, so I hope you enjoy my ridiculous take on Glee's latest Road to Regionals. Enjoy!

*~*~*GLEE*~*~*

Hunter Clarington felt like crap.

Not for tripping that Freshman on the spiral staircase on his way to homeroom. The kid was moving at a snail's pace and sniveling about some test that was 'sooo tough'. Hunter had places to be and such weakness could not be tolerated, especially that early in the morning.

Not for crushing the dreams of the other Glee clubs at Sectionals. He had been confident in the Warbler's ability to turn it out, and their victory had been swift and sweet. Sent those Mennonites straight back to their plows, or whatever Mennonites did.

No, Hunter felt like crap because he was sick as a dog, and from the coughing he could hear from the guys next door, he wasn't the only one.

"Okay, guys, new plan! East Lima Elementary has this 'reading is fun' thing in their library every Thursday after school, and a lady called and asked Figgins if we could sing something to help the kids with the alphabet."

Blaine, ever polite and supportive, fought hard not to roll his eyes, even as Artie facepalmed next to him and the rest of the club groaned. Finn may have been grasping at straws, but at least he wasn't ready to give up. He glanced at Tina, who looked resigned, and stood to help Finn teach the club their old Jackson 5 medley.

"Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against singing for little kids, but with Regionals in two weeks and knowing in my heart we won't be there, it's super depressing." Tina closed her locker door with a bit more force than necessary and turned to face her friends.

Artie shrugged. "True dat. This was supposed to be our year! Our chance to prove we didn't need Rachel Berry to carry us to the top. I just hope we don't have to sing at any more assemblies. My Dad freaks out every time McKinley shows up on the evening news."

Blaine followed Artie and Tina down the hall toward Physics, determined to stay positive. "We'll find other places to sing, I'm sure of it. The Warbler's have been performing at the Buckeye Bluffs nursing home since the '80s, and it's always a lot of fun. The ladies are really nice, too, they even baked us cookies."

Tina grinned. "Probably because you look like you just got back from fighting Nazis with Captain America," she said, tugging at his hair. Blaine swatted her hand away good-naturedly as Artie laughed. "That's a sweet idea and everything, but it's gonna take more than some nursing home visits to get us out of this funk."

"No! Shhhhhh!" Artie waved his hands frantically. "Not so loud! Don't give Finn any more ideas!" Now it was Blaine's turn to laugh. He listened intently as Artie and Tina recounted, for the hundredth time, tales of Glee Club's past, leaving their worries for another day.

A surprise visitor was waiting for them at that afternoon's Glee rehearsal. As the New Directions filed into the Home Ec kitchen, their approved meeting place for the week, they found a tall boy in a Dalton Academy blazer standing by the double ovens. The blond looked nervous, although it was hard to tell with the surgical mask he was wearing.

All eyes turned to Blaine, who had come in last after holding the door for Britney. He squinted at the stranger in confusion.

"Jeff?"

The boys eyes widened and he rushed forward, wringing his hands.

"I didn't know where else to turn. The Warblers are in trouble, Blaine! You guys have to help us!"

"Is the theme for Regionals 'Mad Scientists'?" Britney asked.

Sam put a hand on her shoulder. "I think it's 60's Beach Party, actually."

Finn gestured for them to pipe down and turned to Jeff. "Dude, what's going on? And why are you wearing a mask?"

Jeff ran a hand through his hair and turned to face the group. "It's a total nightmare! Almost all of the Warblers are out of commission. Swine Flu is sweeping through Dalton like the Plague!"

Everyone in the room took a giant step back from Jeff. Sugar attempted to hide behind Joe's dreadlocks as Kitty made a break for the door.

Jeff backpedaled frantically. "No, not me! Me and the other guys have been super careful, there are so few of us left. I even had to burn my old blazer."

Blain looked horrified. Casting him a worried glance, Artie turned to Jeff and asked, "How many of you are left?"

"Six."

The group was silent a moment, reflecting on the tragedy of the situation, before Finn said, "Why did you come to us?"

Jeff's face became determined behind its mask. "I've been doing some research, making some calls, and I think I've come up with a solution, if you guys are up for it." He took a deep breath. "The officials I talked to said that we could join forces with the second place group, that is, you guys, and we could all sing together! What do you say?"

He glanced nervously around the room, and was met with many sullen and bitter looks.

"And why should we help you? So the Warblers can go to Nationals?" Wade asked, crossing his arms. Several others murmured their assent.

Blaine, however, looked thoughtful.

"What would happen if we won?"

"That's the best part!" Jeff said excitedly, relieved that he had yet to be tarred and feathered by angry public school choristers. "If our combined group wins, both schools go to Nationals! They feel bad about the New Directions girl who fell during your set-" Marley sank down in her seat, "and the Warblers have a reputation for excellence that spans from-"

"Okay, we get it, you're awesome," Blaine said with a grin. "Geez, you're starting to sound like Wes."

The little they could see of Jeff's face turned red. "Don't tell Nick and Trent that, they'd never let me live it down. But I was elected temporary head of the Warblers, since Hunter's sick, too."

Blaine frowned. "What does Clarington think of your idea?"

Jeff squirmed guiltily. "Well, he…I haven't exactly told him yet."

"No."

"But Hunter-"

"Absolutely not."

Jeff had set his phone on speaker and the others stood crowded around it as the disgruntled voice of Hunter Clarington filled the room, followed by even more disgruntled coughing.

"C'mon, Hunter, think about it. Our only other option is to forfeit! Do you really want to just step aside and let Vocal Adrenaline waltz off to Nationals?"

Jeff's words were met with the sound of a truly spectacular sneeze. They waited a moment for Hunter to blow his nose.

"How do you know we can trust them, Sterling?" Hunter grumbled. "They must be jumping at the chance to make us look like idiots."

Jeff turned to Blaine, who said, "You guys are honorable opponents. The Warblers have always had our respect."

"And everyone wants another chance to compete," Tina chimed in. "We've been dying for another real performance, and if we can pull this off, we can all go to Nationals."

They thought they heard Hunter sigh, although it may have been a wheeze. His coughing even sounded resigned. "Alright. But no funny business. You had better make it through to Nationals so we can thoroughly crush you in June."

DUN DUN DUN

I'm almost finished, I'll have the rest up by this evening, just wanted to go ahead and post the first half. You can check out my Glee one shots, Taking Chances and Dueling Divas, if you like; they're pretty fun, too : ) This is the first time I've attempted to write about the Warblers, and they're crazy fun. Thanks for reading!

MA