One glorious day when the heavens opened up and shined heavenly light that was filled with bits and morsels of heaven in it, Lightning rolled out of bed and took a shower because cleanliness is close to godliness. After that, she got dressed in her usual Guardian Corps attire—you know, the really short skirt and mid-section revealing jacket.
After eating a good, healthy, nutritious breakfast like her papa always taught her to do, she went to the door to leave. But there was a package on the doorstep, so she took the time to take it inside and open it. Inside was a letter and some articles of clothing.
"Dear Claire," read the letter, "I hope you are doing well. It's really nice here in Heaven. I get a great, omniscient view of the world and also lots of free cable. But one day while looking down with all my omniscience, I noticed I could see too much of your skin. Please bundle up and keep safe with these hand-knitted articles. Love, Papa."
Lightning unfolded a nice pair of pants and a turtleneck, subsequently trying them on and doing just what her papa told her to do because she's a good girl.
Anyway, Lightning spent the whole day accessorizing her new, super-awesome clothes, so she called in a sick day at the Guardian Corps. Office. Amodar promptly put two of his best people on the job to cover for Lightning, because no matter how great they were, they still couldn't outshine her.
So officers Unknown and Unknown 2 started walking Lightning's beat. Unknown got a cup of coffee while Unknown 2 napped under a bridge like a hobo, because consequently, Unknown 2 was a hobo who just stole a dead officer's uniform.
Later in the day, a couple of burglaries, murders, and uprisings happened and team NORA stopped them successfully while officers Unknown and Unknown 2 played a rousing game of Pooh sticks.
"What is Pooh sticks?" Unknown 2 asked after the seventh round.
"It's a game," replied Unknown after the fifteenth round.
"But what kind of game is it?" Unknown 2 asked after the seventieth round.
"A fun one," replied Unknown after the one hundred and eighth game.
"How fun?" Unknown 2 asked after the one hundred and thirty second game.
"Real fun," replied Unknown after the six thousand four hundred and fifty ninth game.
"Oh," replied Unknown 2 as he stopped to ponder. "How's it played?"
Unknown explained the rules after winning the one million fifty five thousand three hundred and twelfth game. Unknown 2 hummed in accordance.
"Sounds like a stupid game," said Unknown 2 as he threw away his Pooh stick.
"Yeah," Unknown agreed as he, too, threw away his Pooh stick.
Both officers took another nap under the bridge.
Meanwhile, Roo grabbed their discarded Pooh sticks and subsequently returned them to the Fellowship of the Pooh.
The End.