Beta: HgBookworm
Light shone through the window of the hospital ward. It was a beautiful day, a day to be outside. However two people refrained from doing so. Harry Potter was sitting beside a hospital bed. He looked slightly ruffled, his hair untamed and his clothes full of wrinkles as if he hadn't changed them in days. His head was bent in sorrow and his eyes shone with grief. Who would have ever thought that he would be mourning for this man? He hated him, that he did. Yet when he saw him lying there he could not hate him, and for that, he hated himself.
It was after he fired the deadly curse that he found out that Snape had actually helped him. Snape had pleaded him to understand, to listen, but he had not listened. He was so consumed by his anger that he fired the curse. And that was why, in the bed next to him, Professor Snape was about to die. He was deadly pale and by his gaunt looks you would think he was already dead. Every once and a while his features twisted in pain, as if trapped in a nightmare. His breathing was erratic and his pulse low. He would not live much longer.
Harry's head shot up a he heard a low moan. Was he waking up? He watched the professor intently. His features were again twisted in pain, but after a few minutes, he released the breath he hadn't even realised he had been holding. He grimaced. It was rather strange; he felt obliged to sit here and yet he was dreading a confrontation. He did not want to see the hate in the dark eyes, the loathing, knowing that his eyes did not hold these emotions. He should hate him for killing Dumbledore and indirectly Sirius, but he could not. The man had done so much wrong, but in the end he had helped him. Without his help he wouldn't be sitting there now! He did not know what to feel anymore.
"Potter?" A strained voice whispered. Harry woke up from his thoughts and saw Snape looking at him from his bed.
"What are you doing here, Potter?" Snape forced out.
Harry looked in the professor's eyes. He could not read them; they were blank with no emotion. It made him nervous. What was he doing here? He did not know.
"I don't know," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
In Snape's eyes, there was a brief revelation of an emotion. He couldn't see what it was though. Suddenly Snape laughed humourlessly. Harry started and looked alarmed.
"Who would have thought that Harry Potter would sit at my deathbed? I thought you didn't care. I thought nobody cared," he added bitter.
Harry looked helplessly at Professor Snape. He wanted to say something. Anything.
"I know you hate me. And I deserve it. I deserve to die. I should thank you, Potter, for ending my life," he muttered.
Harry started to say something, but Snape raised his hand. "You know, I really need to thank you. I will finally be relieved of all the guilt. The regret." He paused.
Harry took a deep breath. "I- I do not hate you, Professor" It felt as if he betrayed Sirius and Albus as he said that.
"Really?" Snape muttered sceptical. "You just say that to ease my pain" He cast Harry a look. "You do not mean it."
"But I do!" He hated this. He hated being helpless. He wanted to do something. Anything!
"You are a terrible actor, Potter, and you know you hate me," Snape said.
Harry closed his eyes in anger. " Do you know how difficult it is to say it? Believe me, I do not hate you. I don't know why I don't. But I simply can't hate you!" Harry shouted.
"You…." Snape seemed at a loss of what to say.
"You do not hate me?" Snape whispered weakly.
"No I do not." Harry said. Looking Snape directly in the eye.
"But you should hate me," Snape said confused.
"But I cannot," Harry whispered.
"Why?" Snape whispered. His eyes were now full of emotion, but it wasn't anger or hate or loathing. It was doubt.
"Why don't you hate me?" Harry asked Snape.
Snape's eyes changed. Doubt was replaced by understanding.
"I understand," he said. Immediately after he said that, his face clouded with pain. He closed his eyes.
"Professor?" Harry asked fearfully.
Snape did not show any reaction. His features were twisted in pain. His eyes moved behind his eyelids.
"No! No I swear I…" Snape said in a strained voice. Harry watched in horror as Snape fought an invisible enemy. Harry then came to a decision. He lowered himself on the bed, and said sincerely,
"I forgive you."
Snape seemed to be stunned for a moment. He rested his head back. His features for the first time were peaceful. Harry watched as Snape slumbered in a deep sleep. Unable to hold his tears back any longer, he cried.
A/N: I was not totally sure about this oneshot, I think it is a little bit too dramatic. Please R&R