Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer – not me. I also don't own the song featured in this story.

Newly Rated: M

New Full Summary (as of 3/19/2010): Sixty years after Edward leaves in New Moon, Bella is on the brink of death – and he can't stay away from her. He follows her into the void after her tragic death, and by a twist of fate the two meet again. Alice is plotting a way to get the couple together once more, but with their dark pasts and entanglement in all things supernatural, will they ever get a chance to truly be together again? Rated M for dark and suggestive themes. Canon pairs, and possible lemons in the future. Somewhat OOC. Vampires and humans both.

I've been busy at school, so I don't really have time quite yet to work on a real story. But I've had this idea mulling around in my head for a long time, and while I know it's been done before, I wanted to try my hand at it!

EDIT: READ THE A/N AT THE BOTTOM, PLEASE!

Far Away from Where You Are

~*~

Edward shuddered, and not from the cold. He knew this day would come, but that didn't make him dread it any less. In fact, his anxiety mounted more and more as time passed. He wished with every fiber of his being that he had never left her, crying and broken, on that fateful day. Edward had since learned that he shouldn't have left her behind. Selfishly, wished he had never come back to see her holding hands and laughing with another man. It tore his heart into pieces, and he thought – no, he knew – that if he had never seen her with that man, Jacob, he would have ran back to her and groveled before her, begging for her forgiveness.

Edward had stopped trying to live day by day, and was struggling to live through each hour – each minute. Each filament in his being was screeching at him to go back to her; back to where the light was. Everything surrounding Bella was full of light, and anything past her radiance was darkness. Edward was blinded by her light, and could see nothing else but her. His mind was battling with his heart… and his heart eventually won. He came back to Forks, a plan already formulating in his mind to beg her to take him back. To tell her he loved her after all, and though he was a monster, he would do anything within his power to just be near her vivacity. He was prepared to do anything – to plead, to wait, to serve her. However, he wasn't prepared for what actually happened.

No, when he saw her and heard the boy's thoughts of love and happiness, he couldn't bring himself – a cold-blooded monster – to intrude on her future. Not again. Not ever. It killed him to see them so euphoric together while he was so distraught, but her happiness was the only thing that mattered to him. He could live this damned life as long as he knew she was alive and content.

And yet, he couldn't stay away! Every year, he watched as she grew into a beautiful woman; even more so than when he first laid eyes on her. Her hips and breasts filled out, her mahogany locks became more lustrous and kissed her heart-shaped face. Oh, how he yearned to be those locks. He watched as the color slowly came back to her deep, chocolate eyes after the heartbreak he knew he – only more proof that he was a monster – caused her, and he watched as her smiles became more genuine, eventually morphing into the laugh he so cherished. Just hearing her laugh allowed him to forget his agony, if only for a little while.

He was always there; guarding over her to make sure she was well taken care of and, most importantly, happy.

The rain poured down on his car, unrelenting. The sky seemed to match his black mood as he traversed the distance to his home. It was getting dark, and he knew it would be late by the time he got there. He just hoped it wasn't too late. The thought alone was enough to suffocate him, so he switched the thoughts in his mind to easier ones, ignoring the rather large elephant in the car.

His "distractions," as he so eloquently put it, had him chasing all over the world for the vampire that wished to do her harm. It was his responsibility to take care of the mess he made. Edward had to admit it; he wasn't very good at tracking, and many times he fell into Victoria's false traps and she evaded him. He was in Brazil by the time he realized that she had lead him into another dead end and finally came back to his home in Forks to guard over his lost love. Victoria never made an appearance after he returned; she had seemingly disappeared off the face of the earth. But he welcomed the peace, for he knew she was safe.

Between chasing after the evasive vampire, Edward was a mess. He would often end up on the damp floor of his chosen shelter for hours on end, curled up into a rigid ball and heaving with dry sobs. He would writhe in agony and hoped it would fade away, yet he realized that he deserved it. As much as it pained him, he pictured her face in painstaking detail, and it burned a whole into his mind… and his heart. He couldn't help but to remember her; the way she used to smile at him, her angelic face lighting up, and her eyes full of love. He recalled kissing her delectable lips, and wondering at the passion he felt that seemed to engulf even the constant bloodlust for her.

But the bloodlust – oh, how it pained him to keep from breaking her thin skin and lapping at the astounding ambrosia in her swan-like neck until she was drained of life. The images would be dredged up every time he saw her, no matter how hard he tried to force them down, and it only served as a reminder to the fact that he wasn't good for her. He would never be good enough for an angel. She was in constant danger while around him, and it was painfully obvious to him that she would have a happier life without him – a soulless vampire – in the picture. The incident with Jasper almost killing her was the final straw, and as much as it tortured him, he had no other choice. She could be killed while around him. He left her.

Edward left her alone in a forest, broken. Broken. He told her that he couldn't continue doing this; he couldn't continue being with her. That she wasn't good for him. The thought would be humorous if not for the grave circumstances.

She was so confused, and it was obvious she was trying to hold back tears as the devastating words sunk in. "You… don't… want me?" she asked.

The look on her face when he told her the one word that somehow broke all his vows to her was almost enough to keep him there. Her eyes, clouded over with confusion and pure agony as he told her, "No," was almost enough for him to fall to his knees, sobbing, and tell her it was all a lie. That he didn't mean it; he loved her with all that he was, and it was impossible for him to ever stop. That he wished he was human so he could give her the life she so needed. He longed to shake her and ask, "How could one word break your faith in me? Why can you believe the lies, but not the truth? After all the times I told you I loved you, one word would make you stop believing?!" But he didn't. Edward hardened his face into a cool mask like he always did and continued to feed blatant lies to her. It was the blackest kind of blasphemy. If nothing else, that was enough to make him a monster. He loathed himself.

His family was in a constant state of distress after he forced them to leave their lives behind for him. Alice could hardly look at him without feeling resentful. Jasper blamed himself for what happened, and couldn't stand to be anywhere near Edward because of his distraught emotions. Emmett's usually smiley demeanor was lost and he moped around. Rosalie, even, found herself missing her – if for no other reason than to not have to see her siblings and husband so upset. Carlisle tried to be understanding of Edward's decision, but it was obvious he didn't approve. And Esme… Esme looked as if she had lost a daughter. She tried to hide it, but her thoughts would break when she thought he wasn't aware and he knew that she was in pain. Over his decision. It seemed he could never stop causing people pain.

There was always a heavy, morose air around the house when he was around. Edward couldn't live with the constant pity and resentment, and he especially couldn't live with the pain. He made sure to stay away from his family and kept himself occupied with his "distractions" – though it only seemed to cause them to worry more.

He was broken from his thoughts as he stopped his silver Volvo three streets down from her house. It was dark, and the full moon shone brightly, derisively mocking him. As if anything should be bright on a day such as this! He took off in a sprint and was behind the single house that held so many fond memories in seconds, standing at the place where he usually concealed himself on his visits. He could smell her scent everywhere, even outside in the rain, and his throat burned. It was fainter than it used to be, but every instinct in him screamed to assail her, even after all this time. It disgusted him.

Edward took a breath and maneuvered up the tree beside the house and through her bedroom window in a flash. He barely registered the other two heart beats within the house; he was only focused on her. There were no signs of a disturbance as he quickly opened her window and lunged inside, landing silently on his feet like he had so many times before.

He stopped, wide-eyed.

There was Bella.

She looked so frail, and he couldn't contain the broken sob that ripped through his frozen chest at the sight of her. She was bruised in several places, as if she was still clumsy after all this time, and her blue and purple veins were prominent in the translucent skin enveloping her. Her body, once full of life, hung limply within the bed. Her heart was thumping slightly – barely a whisper now – slowed from the strong beat it used to have.

She looked as if she was barely clinging to the last vestiges of life.

In the past when he had come to see her, he admired the way age seemed to treat her. She always managed to look young and vibrant, even when she was older. Her face showed no signs of wrinkling until she was in her late 50's, and despite that, time treated her beautifully. She was always, always beautiful. Even now she was beautiful, despite her vulnerability.

Memories flooded through Edward. He remembered most everything that happened throughout her life. In her early twenties she had finished college and worked as a teacher in Forks High, and lived in a quaint little house near Charlie. It was as if she never wanted to leave her past behind – or at least Edward hoped. He always fancied that she still loved him, despite all that he had done to her. She had developed a stable relationship with Jacob (He couldn't help but to sneer his name, even now), and they got married when she was twenty-five. She gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and named her Esme – when Edward first heard this, his heart had clenched painfully. Her capacity to love despite all she had been through astounded him. Esme had since gotten married and had two beautiful babies.

Bella seemed truly happy as time went on, and Edward couldn't help but to smile every time he saw her. Of course, she would never notice him, but he was always there. Always.

When Charlie passed away, Bella was devastated – but somehow managed to make it through like she always did. She inherited the house, and after Jacob died in a car accident years later, she moved into it. At that point in time, Edward had almost come back to her. But she was always surrounded by the people she loved, and he thought that she was still happy despite her losses.

Edward couldn't contain himself any longer and launched himself toward her. She was sleeping, her eyes closed lightly. Her face was serene, despite the minuscule frown on her face. Her frail body adjusted around her bed. It was obvious that she wasn't comfortable, and all he wanted to do was hold her and never let her go. Then he heard it.

A whisper, as quiet as a sigh, took flight and hit him like a brick wall. "Edward…"

It tore him apart. He swore that his dead heart thumped in that second, as euphoric emotions washed over him. She remembered. He couldn't hold himself back as he gripped her hand lightly, as if she were a fragile bird, and whispered, "I'm here, Bella. I'm here." Despite whispering, his voice was trembling.

Bella was startled awake as she felt something cold touch her hand. Chocolate brown met smoldering gold in that instant, and a shock went through the two. Neither of them pulled back.

Edward was expecting her to scream in a hoarse voice, and mentally prepared himself for the grief it would cause him. He was caught, and he couldn't look away. Not even for a second.

Then she spoke. "I had hoped you would come; it was the only thing I wanted. I was waiting for you, you know." Her voice was raspy from sleep, and so feeble. Edward's dormant heart wrenched again.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I… I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. I'm so sorry." It was obvious that he was apologizing for much more than keeping her waiting. There was so much he wanted to tell her. So much that she didn't know. He was surprised she didn't pull away and demand answers or tell him to leave.

"Shh… you don't need to tell me. I already know," Bella whispered. Her voice trailed off and she had to take a breath before going on again. "I missed you." She lifted her hand up to trace the contours of his face. He was shocked at the touch, and stood frozen for a few seconds before responding and leaning his face into her hand. It felt so good – so right – that he almost lost it right then. A tear rolled down Bella's beautiful face, and he watched, fascinated, as it trailed down her cheek. He bent down and kissed it lightly, tasting the salty fluid.

Edward clenched his eyes shut and buried his face in the curve of her neck. "I love you. I love you so much," he choked out. "I never stopped loving you."

Bella was watching Edward in wonder. It seemed as though he hadn't aged a single day since the last time she had seen him. It brought to her a sense of nostalgia, and she reminisced of bittersweet memories. In that instant, she felt whole again. He was here, with her. After all those years…

"I know, Edward. I know. I couldn't stop loving you despite what happened. You were always with me in my heart, and you gave me the best years of my life." She smiled. She had long since forgiven him for what he had done. It just felt so good to drink in his sweet scent once more. Her memories of him hadn't done her justice; he was more perfect than she could have imagined on her own. His bronze locks were unruly as if he had been running; and his chiseled features, even while twisted with his distress, were the most beautiful she had ever seen. And his eyes… he looked up to her, and caught her blatantly staring at him. The orbs were deep and golden, and she felt she could get lost in their swirling depths forever. She would die a happy death while lost in his eyes.

Bella broke into a small smile at the thought – some things never change. At least now she would get the chance to die whilst staring into his dazzling eyes.

"You know… I found the pictures and CD you hid under the floorboards," Bella said suddenly. She had a wistful look on her face. "I think that was the time that I fully realized why you left."

When Edward had left her, he said she would live on as if he had never existed. He had almost taken the birthday presents she had been given, and yet he couldn't bring himself to take away her gifts. He thought she would at least have those to remember him by, if she ever found them.

"I couldn't bring myself to take them away from you. They were meant to be enjoyed, and honestly, I wanted a part of me to always be near you. It was selfish, I know, but I couldn't stand to just confiscate them." He had a hard time admitting that part of the reason he stashed them nearby was to keep a piece of him with her, always. Edward tangled his fingers in her soft white hair and laid his body down against her, careful not to crush her in any way. He buried his face in her sweet neck again, gulping in what could be the last time he smelled her scent of freesias and strawberry. The thought brought on new waves of anguish, and Edward had to force his next words past the frog in his throat. "I wish I could go back in time. I never would have left you – I can't see you… go, Bella." He couldn't say the word that was looming heavily in the air. "I just can't. I wish I could change you, right now. Something. Tell me how to save you, Bella!"

But they both knew that he couldn't change her – not now. Her feeble heart wouldn't be able to pump the blood through her; wouldn't be able to survive the agony of changing. Her voice cracked when she said, "We both know you can't, Edward. It's fine; I'll be okay. I'm happy for the life you've given me, and I know now that I can pass in peace." She'd had a long time to get used to the idea of dying.

She realized that Edward would think everything was his fault, and might resort to drastic measures after she was gone. She had to make sure he understood the truth. "And don't you go blaming yourself for any of this. None of it is your fault; you did what you thought was right, and I've lived a happy life. I couldn't ask for more." She knew everything would be very different if he had never left, but she was happy just to have him back now. The hole that was in her chest all this time no longer ached as she breathed in his saccharine scent. She was finally whole again.

But Edward knew that he was to blame for what happened. He knew she wouldn't have let him leave if she knew what he was doing beforehand, just as he wouldn't have left if he knew it would be this painful. He never wanted to let her go, and yet… there was nothing he could do now. He felt so lost, so helpless. A knife stabbed his quiescent heart.

The heart pumping her life through her veins was slowing. They both could feel her life ebbing away, and knew there wasn't much time left before she passed. Edward could only hope she would pass in peace, content. He decided to make the most of his time left with her and clung desperately to her, as if she was on a the brink of falling off a towering ledge and he was holding her back.

"Don't go… don't go," he pleaded with her. With what deities there were. Bella stroked his hair softly, a smile permanently etched on her face since she glimpsed his fair face. She lifted his head to her, anguished golden eyes meeting chocolate brown depths full of love. He knew what she wanted, and pressed his lips to hers.

The passion that erupted in them at that moment was so fierce – so very full of longing and promises and ache – that they couldn't pull away. Her frail, soft lips pressed against his smooth ones and he pressed his opened mouth to her harder. Their kiss was quickly turning desperate, as if trying to make up for their lost time. She opened her mouth and their tongues met, sweet and full of love and passion. He savored the scent of her, the taste of her, and her fire engulfed him.

Her frail arms reached up and grasped his neck, trying frantically to draw him closer into her intimate embrace. Her heart was struggling to pump blood throughout her body the more they kissed in her heightened state, yet they couldn't bring themselves to stop.

Bella's head was swimming, and she felt as though he had never left in the first place. She felt so alive. So wonderful. His very presence was intoxicating her, making her lose control. She may have been seventy-eight years old, but that didn't affect how she felt pleasure. If anything, she was more enraptured by him now than ever before.

Eventually, Edward had to pull away. His body was trying to force him back to her, but with an extreme amount of effort and concentration, he heaved himself away. He was breathing hard despite not needing to breathe, and Bella's breaths were coming short and shallow. After she calmed herself down a smidge, she opened her mouth and said softly, the words barely able to be heard, "Take me to our meadow, please."

Edward was shocked, to say the least. Take her to the meadow in this state? Really? He was going to shake his head and tell her no, but he didn't want to deny her anything. Eventually, he complied. He picked up her body, wondering at how she was as light as a feather, and told her to hold on and close her eyes.

Bella felt the wind rushing through her hair and Edward's steady breathing. Just like old times, she thought. His running was so smooth that she couldn't even tell they were moving, except for the soft light of the moon flickering against her closed eyes when they passed under breaks in the trees and the wind rustling against her, caressing her face and kissing her frail mass.

Edward wasn't watching the trees as he flew past them, barely touching the ground and not making a sound. He was watching her face. She was so beautiful. She had a slight, but euphoric smile on her face and he drunk in the sight. She was clutching his neck, nestled in his arms like a newborn child. Soon – too soon, he thought with a sigh – they reached the meadow. It was bathed in the glow of moonlight, impossibly beautiful despite it being night and in the fall.

"Open your eyes," he told Bella. He still thought she was the most beautiful part of the forest. The meadow was surely striking, but she was exquisite. She fit here, bathed in moonlight in such an enchanting place. Her eyes were wide, taking in everything. He slowly laid her down on a bed of leaves and grass, and rested beside her. He physically couldn't take his gaze off hers – not for a second. Not now.

They were now staring at each other, the love and passion blocking every other emotion out. Bella felt herself getting lethargic, but she couldn't bring herself to look away. He hummed her lullaby for her, his baritone voice washing over her and calming her. The tune spread through her, reaching from the tip of her lovely head to her toes, kissing her wherever it traveled. His eyes were smoldering, and though she could see the pain gripping him as her heart slowed further, she didn't have to search him to see the unconcealed love through them. And she was truly content for the first time since they were together sixty years ago.

They laid there for hours, the moon beaming down on the two lovers cradled in a bed of leaves as life waned in one and had long departed in the other.

Edward knew as soon as her heart had slowed enough that she would be gone soon. Not wanting to ruin her last moments, he peppered her face with kisses. She was having a hard time keeping her eyes open, fighting the overwhelming desire to let sleep take her. Edward stared into her eyes and, in a brief second, she saw the panic there. It was gone, but in that short time, she knew it was there. She pressed her hand to his face and whispered softly, "Don't be frightened. I'll be fine… I love you." Her hand touched where his was lingering at her collar, and pressed it against her heart.

Edward couldn't hold in the panic. He knew it was finally happening – too fast, too fast! Don't let her go yet. Please, please, please… he was pleading. In that second, he was willing to believe in any god as long as she wouldn't go yet. Not yet.

Broken sobs ripped through his chest, wracking his statuesque form. He whispered his love to her, over and over, through his anguish. Bella was smiling and staring into his golden irises as her lungs took one last breath of his appealing scent. He watched as the last of her life ebbed away right before his eyes and couldn't contain the strangled cry that burst through him. She's gone, she's gone, she's gone… his thoughts repeated over and over, a mantra in his head. He shouldn't have ever left her; he should have stayed and changed her, if only to avoid this moment. The hole in his chest ripped open once more and he knew this time that he wouldn't survive it.

The woman's fragile form seemed to fit in with the rest of the meadow even after death. Her serene face was still smiling, her eyes were closed, and she still had a hand curled around the man's, clutching it over her dormant heart. The moonlight shone on her face and leaves fell all around the pair. One was moving, his body still wracking with his harsh, heartbreaking sobs; the other lay still forever. The forest was entirely quiet as her death finally really sunk in to his tormented mind.

The forest echoed with Edward's cry of, "NO!"

She can't be gone… she can't. Not her. Not her. Anyone but her. She doesn't deserve to die! How could you do this to me? To her?! He lost his faith in deities yet again. No god could possibly kill an angel. A lone tear slid town his face, tinged red.

He knew Alice could see what was happening. He knew she wouldn't try to stop him this time. He knew she would let him do it. There was no way Edward was going to live on without Bella. Existing without her wasn't a life at all – it was just that: an existence. There was no life, there was no hope, there was no love. Beauty ceased to exist and Edward watched with unseeing, deadened eyes as the world passed him by. Empty.

~*~

Edward took a deep breath and stepped closer to the edge. He had arrived just in time – the clock had begun ringing out twelve beats and the sun had risen just enough to expose him for what he was. He knew the Volturi wouldn't allow him to put them in a vulnerable position. They'd have no choice but to end him.

As the twelfth ring struck and the crowd around him pulsed in time with the beat, Edward stepped out of his haven behind the shadows. For the briefest of seconds, his skin gleamed with a million diamond facets and the crowd gasped in wonder before the world evaporated. His death was a quick one; he didn't feel anything as he sunk into the dark recesses of the convoluted Earth.

~*~

So far away from where you are,

These miles have torn us worlds apart.

And I miss you

Yeah, I miss you

So far away from where you are,

Standing underneath the stars

And I wish you were here.

I miss the years that were erased,

I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face.

I miss all the little things;

I never thought that they'd mean everything to me.

Yeah, I miss you

And I wish you were here.

I feel the beating of your heart,

I see the shadows of your face,

Just know that wherever you are,

Yeah, I miss you

And I wish you were here.

I miss the years that were erased,

I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face.

I miss all the little things;

I never thought that they'd mean everything to me.

Yeah, I miss you

And I wish you were here.

So far away from where you are,

These miles have torn us worlds apart.

And I miss you

Yeah, I miss you

And I wish you were here.

~*~

Alice's vision flashes and she's pulled into another place entirely…

~*~

A baby's cry echoes around the hospital. The mother sighs with relief; her daughter hadn't breathed for a long time – too long – and she was so worried. The doctors had to put an oxygen mask on her and force air into her lungs. In the time span that her daughter hadn't breathed, panic had crept up her throat and fear had tried to claw its way into her mind. Throughout her pregnancy, she had had complications and was afraid she would misconceive. It was nothing short of miraculous that her baby survived.

"Ma'am, what are you planning on naming her?" One of the nurses asked.

"Isabella," the mother replied. She was staring at her daughter. She already had a full head of brown hair, and her eyes….

~*~

A young baby boy with strange bronze locks stares up at his mother. His emerald orbs were full of wonder as she laughed down at him. He is so wonderful, she thought. His hair color and eyes were hers, but everything else he inherited from his father. He clutched at her finger as hard as his tiny hand could muster. "Oh, my beautiful Edward."

Her husband, a man with the same features as his son, came up behind her and kissed the boy's cheek before blowing slightly, causing a loud noise to echo throughout the house. The boy's nose scrunched and he giggled at his father. The family looked blissful together, eyes full of love.

~*~

Alice let out a relieved laugh. She knew what that vision meant. Suddenly the bleak future had become a lot more interesting…. She ran through the forest back to her home to tell the rest of the family the wonderful news. She was already plotting.

~*~


So, how did you like it? Did I do the story justice? Let me know! Reviews are greatly appreciated!

The song was From Where You Are by Lifehouse. I thought it really fit this story.

3/19/2010 EDIT: I've gotten tells asking if I'm planning on taking this further. I have decided to continue it, after playing around with the plot. On the next chapter, I have a very important A/N that everyone will have to read. I know people don't like long A/N's, but the next chapter's notes at the beginning and end are very important. I promise to not have as long author's notes after that chapter! ALSO: the summary is changing as a result. I will post the new full summary and rating at the beginning of this chapter and next, and all the gritty details next chapter. Thanks for your patience, and I will be cranking out that next chapter very soon, promise. ;)

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