A/N: Listen to your mellow playlist before you read this ;) R&R. I should also warn you that this wasn't edited, sorry.
I knew that deep down, I was still just a poor Rukongai girl. Other people thought I was lucky; it was just luck that made me the wife of the 28th Kuchiki clan leader. The pure, fragile, and lucky Rukongai girl.
And yet, I never thought myself to be one of them. I don't deserve to be a lady, not when I abandoned my younger sister just so that I could survive Rukongai's harsh conditions.
I can never look anybody in their eyes, not when I know that I'm guilty of these heavy sins.
The harsh stares of other nobles didn't bother me, I knew I deserved it. Byakuya-sama wants to establish my importance as his other half, but none of the nobles seemed to be convinced.
"Hisana."
"Byakuya-sama." I bowed and smiled gently at his presence.
"I'm sorry I could not protect you properly…" He frowned at himself.
Sometimes, just like the other nobles and elders, I still can't believe that me, a lowly girl from Rukongai, would hear an apology from a noble as graceful as him. And from the bottom of my heart, I knew I wasn't worthy of it.
"No, Byakuya-sama. It's alright. You have already done enough for me." I bowed again in gratitude; he stood still.
"You are always like that." His voice softened. I blinked slowly. "You always looked down; you never looked anyone in the eye. Why is that?"
I managed to glimpse at his eyes for a moment before looking back down again. "I am nothing but a lowly commoner, I do not deserve such privileges."
Byakuya-sama lifted my chin slowly as he meets my eyes with such love and determination. I widened my eyes at the intensity of his emotions.
"Don't say that. Don't. You're important; important to me. What the others say, doesn't matter. You will always have me; wherever you are, whatever you are… you have me. So, always look into my eyes… remember this whenever you feel undeserving…, nothing can tear us apart."
He was a gift to me; and I embraced him entirely.
In a cold dark room, blanketed by the shadows casted by the moon, I lay quietly still and listened to the silent plead my husband raised into the heavens. I watched the gentle shaking that he tries to hide, the way I tried to hide the blood I coughed. We hold hands in the dark, and I'm afraid he'd be too afraid to let go.
"Byakuya-sama…?" Raspy as my voice be, I didn't pay it too much attention.
He quietly raised his eyes and looked directly at me. I already gave him too much pain and burden; he'll carry the burden of finding my sister even though I should be the one to shoulder it. It hurts.
"Could you…please, come…closer?" He nodded and slowly closer to me.
I reached my hands in his elegant face. I remembered a distant memory from before; I looked into his sad eyes and memorized every detail of his face.
"I want to take a look one more time... I'm not going to see this again." And I did remember it; the love and determination, after all these years, was still there.
I failed to tell him that I'm sorry and I cannot stay. And as I close my eyes, he is the last thing I will remember.
My beautiful and handsome husband.