AN: YAY! So I finally finished the sequel for "Life is not a Go board!" Otherwise known as the Proposition Fic. Thanks for all the positive feedback for the first story, I'm glad people enjoyed it and didn't feel angry over the use of an OC. I hope this is also enjoyable.
Waya Yoshitaka
Waya could swear he only just closed his eyes when the phone went off. The cocoon of blankets was finally just the way he wanted it, the neighbor wasn't having one of his god-awful parties for once, and there were no parties at his apartment to keep him awake. For once he was looking forward to some actual, restful sleep rather than the stupor he often found himself in at around three in the morning when the neighbor stopped blasting music. So of course his phone started blasting the stupid anime theme Shindou programmed it to play when he called.
Waya groaned and rolled over, wrapping the blankets around him more securely. If he ignored it, maybe it would stop. The obscenely cheerful song did two loops before falling silent. There was a beep as it reported a missed call. Five minutes, ten, and it didn't ring again. Waya relaxed. Good. He could sleep until morning and feel rested. And then he could go over to Isumi's and invite him out to that movie they kept planning on seeing. That would be nice. He yawned and burrowed into a comfortable position. And maybe he would play a game against Isumi after…and dammit, the phone was ringing again.
"Whaaaat?" he growled into the receiver before the song could get any further. "I'm trying to sleep."
"Waya?" Shindou sounded strained and more than a little freaked out.
"Who else would it be? You're calling my cell phone. Are you okay? You sound…weird."
"No…Um…Yes?"
"Shindou, talk or I'm hanging up and going back to bed." Ok, maybe it was a bit harsh if Shindou actually had a problem, but Waya wasn't feeling very patient at the moment. He kicked his legs free of the blankets and sat up.
"I was propositioned."
"What." Ok…. He hadn't expected that. "Shindou, I thought we agreed not to talk about our sex lives after the incident with—"
"It's not like that! I'm calling for advice!"
"What's to advise? You go for it if you're interested, you don't if you're not." God, he did not want to be having this conversation at…He checked his phone. At one in the morning. They'd talked later than this before, but he was sleeping, damn it.
"….It's not that simple." Shindou's voice was so quiet Waya had to strain to hear it over the echoey static that all phones seemed to have.
"Then what's the issue then?" If Shindou didn't get to the point, he'd go back to bed, rude or not. There was silence on the other end. "Shindou, I'm hanging up in three…two…"
"It was Touya!" Shindou burst out. It was hard to tell if it was the phone or emotion distorting his voice.
"That cheating bastard." It was one thing to joke around with Shindou about some weird emotional affair going on. It was entirely different if Touya was actually initiating an affair. "I know his marriage has never been all that fiery, but I thought he'd at least be a dutiful husband! I mean think about Natsume-san and—"
"Waya!" Hikaru cut him off. "It's not just Touya. It's both of them."
"What." Either Hikaru was trying to break his brain or he was still dreaming. It was sounding more and more like the latter. "Natsume-san, sweet, dutiful, patient Natsume-san who's only ever polite and proper, propositioned you."
"Yes. And Touya. I think it was her idea though."
"You're kidding me."
"Why the hell would I joke about this? Help me out here, there's only so long I can stay in the bathroom before it gets awkward, and you already ignored my first call."
"Shindou, what the hell? You're still there? Don't tell me you're considering it!" He should have never picked up his phone. He should have ignored it and let Hikaru yell at him tomorrow. He wanted nothing to do with this shit. Gah, there was no way to bleach this out of his brain.
"…well…I do kind of like them both, and I trust them not to fuck me over like my girlfriends, and there was that one time at the annual Christmas party that I tried to make out with Touya… Um. He turned me down and was all nice about it and I was pretty drunk at the time, but I don't find him unattractive. And Natsume-san's very nice and fun to talk with about non-go related things, and it's not like I wouldn't have been at their house all the time anyway and have their kids calling me Uncle someday and stuff…"
"Shindou! Possibly being a future biological father to one of the hypothetical future children is not the same! At all! And when the hell did that happen at any Christmas party? How did I miss something like that?"
"Do you really think I'd pounce on Touya in public no matter how drunk I was? It was when we went outside to get some air. Besides, that's the Christmas that everyone knows what happened, even if you and Isumi refuse to acknowledge it ever happened." Shindou was starting to sound less freaked out and more annoyed. Which might be an improvement. Mostly Waya wanted to smack Shindou for mentioning that day.
"I get it, shut up."
"Ignoring it doesn't change that it happened."
"And if I ignore this phone conversation you'll still be in Touya's bathroom freaking out." Sometimes it was exhausting being Shindou's friend. And there was no call for bringing up…that… Which totally was a mistake. They both agreed on that. And they'd been drunk at the time so really, it didn't count or anything like that. "Whatever." Waya scrubbed a hand through his hair, making bed-head stick out even worse. "Look. Do you want to or don't you? I think Touya cares for you enough to respect your decision either way. What's the problem?"
There was more silence from the other end. "What if I fuck this up too? I can't even stay dating a girl for longer than a month. What if I want out? Or what if they tire of me? What if I like someone else later?"
For the love of…. "Shindou, why are you having this conversation with me? Isn't that something you should talk through with them? Lay down your expectations and stuff before you enter into any kind of triangle-y commitment? And I don't know about Natsume-san, but you haven't shut up about Touya since I met you. I kind of doubt getting into a relationship with him will make you leave each others' orbits. If it doesn't work, you'll either talk it through or have one of your legendary arguments, get pissed at each other, and then get on with life." Waya switched the phone to his left hand so he was less likely to give into temptation and throw it at the wall. "Now can I go back to bed?"
"But I really—!"
"Talk to them. If you have to talk about how it goes, call me at a decent hour when I'm not trying to catch up on sleep."
"But—!"
"Good night Shindou." Waya hung up and flopped back among his covers. Shindou got into the strangest situations. Really? Getting with Touya? Eww. At any rate, he was sleeping. If he concentrated hard enough, he might even be able to convince himself it was all a horrible, creepy dream. He pulled the covers over his head. Yes, that sounded much more pleasant than reality. He forgot, for the moment, the message Hikaru left on his phone. The next day, it would bring his forced forgetfulness back to earth. For the moment, Waya stopped thinking about it and went to sleep.
Shindou Hikaru
Hikaru stared at his cell phone. Waya hung up on him. He actually hung up. Some friend he was. Hikaru sat in the guest bathroom at the Touya house on the edge of the toilet seat. His cell phone sat on his lap, illuminating the room with its small square screen. He had been in the room for the last half hour, quietly having a panic attack. Well, mostly quietly. Some of it wasn't very quiet at all, but he trusted neither Touya nor Natsume would outright eavesdrop. They were too polite for that. Then again, he never thought Touya would ask him to join in his happy married life either. Hikaru wasn't sure if he should feel terrified or flattered or what. But he wasn't uninterested.
"This is so messed up." He stared at the pinkish-red carpet as if it held the answers. "Talk to him? How do I talk to him?" Well, how did Touya choose then to ask? Hikaru had half-choked on his green tea from shock and then immediately excused himself to the bathroom. How long had Touya been interested? Since the start? Or did he only start considering within the last few months since the Christmas party incident? (Hikaru still couldn't believe he got so drunk that he hit on a married man. Touya even. But then it was Touya and Touya was always the exception. Maybe he'd liked Touya longer than he thought.)
A knock on the bathroom door made him drop his phone onto the bath rug. "Shindou? Are you okay? If you're that upset, then I remind you that you can refuse."
Shit, Touya was out there. "Just a minute." He flushed the toilet for appearance's sake. It was bad enough to have a panic attack in a bathroom, but Touya was probably polite enough not to call him on the whole not-really-using-the-bathroom thing.
Touya looked both worried and amused when Hikaru opened the door. "Better?" Touya asked.
"Err, yeah…" Hikaru stared at the air somewhere near the vicinity of Touya's left ear. Correction, at the hair next to his ear and how it was pushed behind it to keep it out of his face. It looked silky and touchable. He slapped himself mentally. No, bad image, bad!
"Next time turn the lights on. I'm sure it would make things easier," Touya said with straight-faced politeness that probably meant he was laughing at Hikaru on the inside. "If you can refrain from coughing it up across the table, please come have a new cup of tea."
Hikaru laughed and found he couldn't stop. Walking became impossible and he clung to Touya's patient shoulder. "You…you're so…"
"So…?"
"You're so you," Hikaru said, grinning up, letting Touya support some of his weight with an arm around his shoulders. What was with the tea? It felt too formal for something as illicit as a threesome.
"Who else would I be?" Touya raised an eyebrow. It was the same expression he had when Hikaru tried to teach him to play his old handheld games. Amused, but uncomprehending and more than a bit humoring.
On impulse, Hikaru leaned up and kissed him. For once he figured it was safe to go with the urge. After all, unlike at the Christmas party several months ago Touya propositioned him first. Touya's grip on Hikaru's shoulder tightened before he leaned forward more than willing. Mm. What took them so long to do this? Touya staggered a step back, hitting the wall as if he had trouble standing. Hikaru took advantage of the stability to lean closer, as close as he could with clothing on. Touya pulled back to breathe and Hikaru let him, though he followed the distance with his eyes.
"Well." Touya sounded breathy and his cheeks were flushed pale red. There was a strand of hair caught on his cheek where it was wet with a strand of saliva. "Is that a yes?"
"I think so." Hikaru didn't move away. "We still need to talk about how this is going to work though."
"Of course." Akira glanced over Hikaru's shoulder and smiled. "We should probably return to the kitchen."
Hikaru followed his eyes to the doorway. Natsume stood patiently with an uncharacteristically satisfied expression on her face, like she had been kissed rather than just watching. She was wearing the bracelet Hikaru gave her for her birthday. Akari helped him pick it out. It peeked out of the long sleeve of the blouse Touya gave her on the same occasion. It hadn't occurred to him earlier, but there was something symbolic in her choosing to wear them both that night. It looked like she was laying claim and being claimed at the same time.
Touya led him back to the kitchen, fingers laced with Hikaru's. He stopped in front of Natsume to kiss her cheek and let her lead the way to the table. Natsume passed across a fresh cup of tea.
Hikaru rolled it around in his hands before taking a sip. "So…what brought this on?" he asked after he could no longer pretend the tea was interesting. "Was it the Christmas party?"
Touya smiled. He made tea drinking look graceful and natural next to Hikaru's fumbling, and he took a long sip before answering. "Actually it was before that. I have been hinting for a while." He shared a glance with Natsume. "Both of us have. I did point out Natsume was fond of you."
"And I'm sure you have noticed Akira-san showing more physical affection," Natsume said, teacup shielding what her eyes showed to be an amused expression.
Hikaru thought about that. "I thought you were joking, Touya. And that, I don't know, you finally were comfortable enough to touch back since I always reach out and touch everyone else. How was I supposed to pick up on this?"
"When have I ever joked about infidelity? Or reached out to anyone else?" Touya still had spit sticking his hair to his cheek, he should not look as calm as he did.
Hikaru swirled his tea around and tried to avoid getting flustered enough to retreat to the bathroom again. "Yeah…I know you don't. It's just…this isn't something you see coming."
"I think I know why your girlfriends never stay long."
"Hey! I usually leave them!" And…that sounded bad out loud. Or in general really. Would smacking his head against the table help? No? And he really would rather go back to kissing Touya. But kissing Touya again was a bad idea because then he would really not be able to back out if it looked like things were moving in directions he wasn't comfortable. "Anyway, what…what do you want from me? Why invite me to squish in to your perfectly content marriage? I know I practically live here half the time, but there's a difference from "Friend that crashes on the couch after a night of go" and "more than friend who crawls naked into bed with you.""
Touya had an eyebrow raised again in the "No shit" expression that he was too polite to say out loud. "The house is more alive when you're here," Touya said slowly. "We'll do whatever you are comfortable with. There's no rush. We can see how things go for a month if you prefer. After that, who knows? I am not adverse to the idea of you moving in. Personally I would hope that you don't have any romantic trysts while you are in a relationship with us, but how much you give…commit…is up to you."
"Oh." It was…more generous than he expected. Hikaru thought Touya would be possessive like he was with their rivalry. Maybe Touya was under everything. There was still one more person in the equation though. Hikaru looked at Natsume. She had her hands wrapped around her cup, their nails clipped blunt for practicality. He never knew how she could look so calm constantly. Hikaru was not a calm person, and neither was Touya once you got past the polite exterior, but Natsume…was. She was strange next to their lives ruled by their passions. She wasn't passive though. She didn't deny what she did or didn't like when Hikaru asked her and she was assertive when she thought he wasn't taking care of himself. And here she was, calmly inviting him into her and her husband's bed.
"Only so much as you are comfortable," she echoed. Natsume smiled. "I do not mind watching."
Hikaru wondered how she hid that sort of desire under polite interest. He was sure he hadn't blushed that much in a long time. This night was all kinds off different.
On the wall the clock chimed two times. Two in the morning. Across the table, Touya hid a yawn. "Shindou? Perhaps it would be better to continue our conversation in the morning. Despite the tea we have consumed tonight, this is later than Natsume or I usually stay up."
"Uh…" Was that an invitation to stay the night? It wouldn't be the first time, but he usually stayed in the guest room. What was being offered exactly?
Natsume rose, taking the teacups to the sink. Touya moved to his side and extended a hand. "Come to bed with us?"
"Uh…." Wow, apparently his face could get redder. Hikaru stared at the offered hand.
"To sleep, Shindou," Touya said, clearly amused. "Even if I thought either of us was ready for something more intimate, I certainly am not awake enough to participate."
"Oh." He took Touya's hand and allowed himself to be pulled up. Touya was as warm and solid standing this close as he was against the wall. He couldn't resist kissing him. Touya kissed him back, not chaste, but not hungry either. It was intimate and warm in a way that made his skin tingle with it. When they broke apart, Natsume was watching again. This time it was not as strange or surprising to feel her gaze.
Touya reached for her, and she leaned against his side. He kissed her forehead, pulling Hikaru against them both in a jumble of soft and firm bodies. Feeling warm to the soles of his feet, he let them lead him to their futon.
Hikaru woke to warmth on either side of him and feeling safe. Two hands rested on his stomach, and a leg was in between his. Hair tickled the back of his neck and his bare chest with each breath. He had no idea what time it was, but he felt more rested than he had been in months.
The shift of the leg tangled with his and the twitch of fingers along his abdomen alerted him that the person behind him was awake. The hand belonged to Touya, which meant the person using part of his arm and chest as a pillow was Natsume. He shivered as Touya kissed the back of his neck. "Good morning," Touya murmured.
"Morning." It was a bit surreal, waking up with two people in bed with him instead of one. It was even stranger to have so much intimacy when nothing sexual had occurred. It wasn't a bad feeling though. Just different. He shifted, feeling skin and hair and cloth undergarments brush along him under the sheets. Touya's hand came to rest over his belly button is a mildly ticklish way. He ignored it. "I don't think I can feel my left arm."
Touya lifted himself on one arm to look and laughed quietly. "She likes using people as pillows," he confided. "You grow used to waking up with a limb trapped."
From the arm in question, Natsume murmured something and waved the arm at Hikaru's waist vaguely.
Hikaru smiled and shifted again. "Err…this is nice, but…I need to use the bathroom." He was nice and warm, but Touya's leg was pressed a bit too close to his bladder; and with all the tea last night…
Natsume rolled off his arm with a sigh, already curling back into a sleepy pile of limbs. Touya pressed close once before giving him space. Hikaru wiggled his way upright and tried to massage feeling back into his limp left arm. Tingles and pinpricks shot through it from shoulder to fingertip, but he could flex his fingers again and his arm no longer refused to respond to his efforts to move it. "Be back in a minute," he muttered, heading to the same bathroom he locked himself in the night before. This time he turned on the light.
After relieving the pressure of his bladder, he noticed something on the floor. It was his phone from the night before. He'd been so panicked by Touya's knock, he completely forgot. He flushed the toilet and washed his hands before returning to pick it up off the bath rug. He flicked it open.
According to the screen, he had five missed calls, three voice mails and eight text messages. It was also almost noon. Padding back into the hallway, he flicked through the messages. Waya, Waya, Waya… They were all from Waya. "Shindou, your message tells me last night wasn't a nightmare. What happened with Touya?" "Shindou. Are you awake? I'm asking for details; don't tell me if I'd regret it." "…Is this your way of saying I'd regret it?" "Pick up your phone." "Are you okay?" "Are you still at Touya's?" "Why aren't you picking up your phone? Answer my messages! I know your phone isn't dead. …If Touya's hurt you he's dead." "If you don't answer in the next ten minutes I'm looking for you starting at the bastard Touya's." Hikaru frowned at the last one. It was marked as half an hour ago.
He dialed Waya's number only to have the call go straight to voice mail. Weird. Well, he was awake now, if Waya called again, he'd answer it then. Natsume met him in the hallway dressed in a light robe over her nightgown.
"Akira-san is getting dressed," she said with a smile. "Would you put water on for tea while I prepare breakfast?"
"Ah, sure…" It felt weird to be without a shirt moving around the Touya house, but also…nice. It made it feel like he belonged there a bit more. With the kettle on, Natsume cooking, and Touya still getting ready, he drifted into the hallway.
He was staring at a wall hanging, trying to remember what flower Natsume called it months ago when he asked when something hit the door with a thud. "What the hell?" he gasped as the noise repeated and became distinguishable as violent knocking.
"If someone doesn't open in sixty seconds, I'm making a scene for your neighbors!" the knocker called between pounds.
"Shindou-san, could you answer that?" Natsume's voice asked from the kitchen. Hikaru was already moving toward the door and wrenching it open. Waya stopped his fist just before it smacked into Hikaru's chest.
"There you are, why the hell aren't you answering your phone, idiot?"
"Waya, what the hell?"
Waya looked Hikaru over, taking in his bare chest and wrinkled his nose. "I guess you sorted out the problems. Is Touya any good in bed?"
Hikaru slammed the door in his face. Waya started knocking again.
"Shindou?" Touya, dressed in his usual button down shirt and slacks—although he was strangely barefoot—peered into the hall. "What's going on?"
"Waya thought you ate me or something. He left a bunch of messages and is currently storming the house."
"Ah." Touya buttoned his sleeves as he approached. "I take it he's being his usual blunt self?"
"He's being too blunt." Hikaru scowled at the door.
"I assume no one is at fault but you for calling him last night."
"You knew?" Suddenly the door seemed like a much more promising escape route. Although Touya looked really good right then. Hikaru wondered how he would react if Hikaru touched his hair.
"Shindou, you locked yourself in a bathroom. Who else would you ask advice from?" Touya sighed and set a hand on Hikaru's shoulder for a moment. "It can't be helped though. Let's let him in."
"Are you kidding?" It's half tempting to block the door. "This is Waya we're talking about."
"If we ignore him, it will only make the situation worse," Touya reasoned. He reached around Hikaru and pulled the door open. Waya froze; mouth open in preparation to make another demand. "Are you done yelling?" Touya said in his overly polite voice. "If you are, please, come join us for breakfast."
"…ok." Waya's hand retracted, his mouth snapped shut, and he all but folded in on himself in an embarrassed effort to avoid Touya's stare.
"Shindou, please inform Natsume that we have a guest."
"Right." Hikaru glanced over his shoulder. Waya gave him a pleading look. Hikaru left him to deal with Touya alone. Served him right for pounding on the door and asking insensitive questions. Did he completely forget that they weren't discussing their sex lives anymore?
Natsume was by the stove, taking miso soup off the stove and ladling it into bowls to accompany the traditional breakfast. "I take it Waya-san will be joining us."
"Heh heh…" Hikaru ran a hand through his hair, feeling embarrassed for his friend's sake. "Yeah… Sorry about that."
"It's fine." She smiled. "It's good that you have friends who care."
"Yeah…." And at the moment, Hikaru kind of wished Waya didn't. He took the bowls to the table and set up the tea cups as Natsume scooped rice into bowls. There was scuffling near the doorway and Waya shuffled in behind Touya wearing the guest slippers that Hikaru never wore these days. Hikaru felt the tiniest bit of sadistic pleasure that Waya looked paler than normal. Touya's expression didn't give anything away, but he'd get their conversation out of him later.
Natsume gestured for Waya to take a seat and poured him a cup of tea. "It's nice for you to join us." With the smile Hikaru categorized as passive aggressive, she set down the rice next to the soup. "In the future, however, please knock and wait for the door to be answered. I'm sure it would make both our lives less embarrassing in hindsight."
Waya flushed and slumped in his chair, shooting Hikaru a disbelieving look.
Hikaru smirked and leaned closer. "Now imagine that smile when she's armed with hedge trimmers. I have never apologized so quickly in my life." He wished he was joking about the hedge trimmers. Hikaru knew to watch what he said if Natsume was cooking or gardening. Even if she wouldn't actually use what she was armed with, it was way too disturbing to see a smile used as a threat.
"Sorry for the noise," Waya muttered.
"Think nothing of it," Natsume replied. "I trust you will be discreet from here on about the nature of our relationship with Shindou-san."
"Uh. Yes. You were serious?"
"Naturally."
"Ah."
"Shindou-san, you shouldn't laugh at your friend." Natsume's smile hinted at mischievous as she turned it on Hikaru. "You reacted similarly to the idea."
"Err…" Hikaru forced the laughter from his face. Across the table, Touya was struggling to keep a serious face.
Touya cracked first. Waya, still looking annoyed, scowled as Hikaru followed. Natsume kept smiling.
"It wasn't that funny," Waya muttered when they finished.
"It's your face," Hikaru gasped. "Why do you keep asking if you're going to look so weirded out?"
"I was worried, idiot."
"It's Touya. We fight, but we don't hurt each other, Waya." It wouldn't be Touya without the occasional shouting match. But shouting matches didn't mean fist fights, and Touya wasn't the violent sort of person. But then Waya probably meant worried about him emotionally. "And we're not going to just dive in. All we did was sleep last night."
"Oh." Waya blushed and slouched in his chair until his chin almost brushed the table. "Um, sorry. I saw you like…" He waved a hand at Hikaru's bare chest. "And I assumed… Well, good. I don't want to deal with you torn apart by another rejection."
And despite being rejected before, this mattered ten times more than any of the girls did in the past. He couldn't replace Akira like he could some girl he met with a karaoke group. "Thanks." Hikaru took a bite of his rice. "Don't you usually go to Isumi's around now?"
"Ah, about that…." Waya had started to relax, but he fidgeted instead. "I kind of called around trying to find you."
"Oh, god, who did you call? Please tell me you didn't tell anyone anything personal." Across the table Touya sighed, but Hikaru didn't bother checking his expression. It was probably his "why do I have to deal with people's stupidity" expression.
"Just Isumi. I called your old friend, Akari, and your mom, but they didn't know where you were. I called Touya too, but no one picked up, and you still weren't answering your phone so I might have called up Isumi to vent a bit." Waya picked up his chopsticks and plucked at his rice, shifting it grain by grain from one edge to the other.
"There are worse people than Isumi-san," Touya said. He sounded resigned and a bit annoyed, but not as much as he probably should be. Waya wasn't very good at keeping secrets. Hikaru wasn't either, which made the lack of knowledge about Sai all the more of an anomaly.
"Yeah… Uh, Isumi might show up too."
Touya sighed and exchanged a look with Natsume. "Well, we didn't expect it to happen so fast, but Shindou brings chaos, so he's a welcome guest."
"I do not!" Hikaru protested.
"You come with a group of friends, are loud, informal, and have a tendency to forget important things at my house when you don't live here, Shindou. It might not be chaos to you, but it's not my normal. We know being with you means accepting all the noise and people you carry with you. We love you anyway."
"Uh…" Hikaru blushed, mirroring Waya's slouch. It was one of Touya's comments he wasn't sure if he should feel pleased with or insulted, so embarrassment was a safer response. "Whatever…So, Isumi?"
"I'll prepare another place setting," Natsume said. Touya stood to get another tea cup, and Hikaru looked across the table at Waya.
"Do you think you can try to get along with Touya a bit more?" he asked.
Waya shrugged, picking at his rice. "It's not like we try to get on each other's nerves. Like you don't try to fight with Touya, it just happens."
"Yeah." Hikaru sipped his miso soup. "Still…We're going to be around each other even more."
"I know. As if you two weren't already tied together." Waya sighed. "I won't pick fights. I'll try not to talk to him about important things at all and maybe we won't kill each other with our opposite world views.
"Good." Hikaru smirked. "And I won't be telling you about my sex life."
"God, please don't. I don't want to know about it. I don't even want to think about Touya and sex in the same thought. My brain is breaking and it's your fault Shindou."
Hikaru laughed. A few hours ago he had locked himself in the bathroom to make frantic phone calls, but it felt a lifetime away. He had Touya and Natsume and Waya in his life, and it felt how it should be.
AN: Aaaaand, if anyone is interested, there is a little bit under this cut about Natsume's side of things. If you are interested. I have it seperate because, hey it's a fanfic, and Natsume is an OC, but I wanted to explore her motivations a bit. Thanks for reading! :)
If anyone were to ask her if she was happy in her marriage, Natsume could honestly answer that, yes, she was happy. If not the way movies depicted happiness, she was at the very least content with the path her life had taken. She was not certain going into the marriage that it would last. Akira was reserved and she was not an outgoing person either. They had their own interests and little in common outside of an interest in the classics. He played go. She gardened. He spoke three languages and traveled overseas. She had never left the Kanto region before her marriage.
At the start of their courting, Akira seemed unreal. He was more polite than any man she knew and had seemingly unlimited patience in answering her questions. He was shy, which put her at ease in his presence, and they took walks, talking of their lives and experiences. Perhaps because he was the first to listen to her passion for working among the soil or to understand her devotion to her parents she first began to care for him. It was barely friendship then. They were distant and impersonal, but grew closer the more they spoke of their dreams and passions. There was understanding in that at least. Passion toward a goal is universal.
When Akira proposed she accepted because she knew he would care for her even if they never truly loved each other. She was twenty-six, four years his elder, and her parents were pushing her to marry. Few men were interested in a woman getting on in years with aging parents to support. She was an only child. She was raised to be a housewife and had not gone on in her schooling. The proposal could not have been more welcome.
Perhaps it was strange to think she had Shindou Hikaru to thank for her contentment in her marriage. Natsume would take the knowledge to her grave than admit how uncertain she was the first few months after her wedding.
It was June when she officially met Shindou, almost two months since her wedding. Until then he was a vague face among the wedding guests, a name in go weekly, or the subject of passing comments her husband would make over breakfast or dinner. He was not what she expected. Confident, loud, and lacking in manners, he was the opposite of what she expected Akira's friend to be.
The first day he stared at her whenever she entered a room with wide eyes, stumbled over his words and tracked mud into her home. She should have hated him for how Akira's eyes lit up when Shindou entered the room. If she were a different kind of woman, she would have.
Instead it made her love Akira in a way she didn't before.
When she was preparing dinner, she heard shouting from the study and ran to find Akira red faced and furious as he argued over the position of a stone on the go board with all the passion he never showed her. And Shindou yelled back just as loud, challenging her husband's argument with his own in a way few players had the guts or impetus to do.
She left them to their argument, neither noticing her witness it, and returned to the kitchen to laugh harder than she had since her marriage. It took a burden from her to see that her husband wasn't perfect after all.
Seeing him impassioned made her feel warmer toward him. Seeing him bicker and joke and watch Shindou over dinner made her determined to invite Shindou back again. So she did.
Akira thought she loved Shindou. Maybe she did. The more time she spent with him, the more she came to care for him. But Akira didn't understand that it wasn't Shindou on his own that she cared for. It was seeing Shindou with Akira, seeing Akira show affection and having that affection returned that made her love them both together. Alone, Akira was too perfect, too reserved to make her truly happy. With Shindou he showed his emotions, letting her experience them second hand. With Shindou she had someone to be informal with, to share emotion with and relax.
So she brought up her solution to the emotions swirling around them, and Akira listened.
As Natsume set aside her tea to watch the two men in her life kiss, she knew she made the right choice. Shindou was life and spontaneity. Akira was devotion and stability. She would smooth the differences between them and it would balance out. Shindou reached out to her and she took his hand. She left her tea on the table, still and warm, and did not look back.
