A crack SasuNaru fic. Utter crack, of course romance, and some drama too!
Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto, because if we did, the world would end. Nor do we own Blondie's song, One Way Or Another.
No ninja were hurt… seriously in the making of this fanfic.
Warning: May contain any of the following: yaoi, crack, perverted comments, rapist pedo snake, crossdressing, memory loss, uke-ness, manipulative seme, fluff, trickery, drama, crying, mild abuse, etc.
Sasuke clashed kunai one last time with Naruto before stepping down, wiping at his forehead. "Break?" he asked, putting his weapon down. The blond nodded, panting lightly. The two were eighteen, and Sasuke had recently returned from being with Orochimaru. It ended up the entire thing had been a secret mission to get a spy in Orochimaru's network. Seeing as the Hebi Sannin wanted the younger Uchiha anyways, he made the perfect choice.(1)
Tossing the kitsune a water bottle, the relatively emotionless raven leaned against the wall, drinking from his own. Naruto downed half of his quickly, sitting down on a bench press. "So, did you ever walk in on Hebi-teme raping that four-eyed lapdog(2) he had?" he asked, grinning pervertedly up at his friend. Sasuke chucked his empty bottle at him with a small smirk. "No, I got lucky. But I did walk in on him singing one day." he retorted, shuddering at the thought.
The blue eyes widened with curiosity, and the Kyuubi container leaned closer. "Eh? What was the freak singing?" he questioned. Sasuke shuddered lightly again, eyes closing briefly. "That one song, One Way or something." the raven answered. Naruto frowned, confused. Sasuke sighed. "One way or another, I'm gonna find ya, I'm gonna get ya get ya get ya." he droned out. Eyes wide with terror, the kitsune made a small retching sound. "Yuck! I would have screamed and ran! I don't know how you survived!" he said. Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I know, dobe."
Naruto stuck his tongue out at the Uchiha. "That man just scares the crap out of me." he announced. Sasuke smirked slightly, getting an evil idea. "Psh, you thought you had it bad, you should have seen what he could do with that tongue." he said, seeming to think aloud. The blond across from him shivered, making a face. Trying not to smirk even more, the sadistic Uchiha pulled out an older bingo book, finding Orochimaru's page.
"Oh, Kami, his eyes too." the raven-haired teen continued. The shorter ninja closed his eyes, shaking his head. "Ew, ew, ew, no stop it!" he moaned, pulling at his hair. Sasuke smirked this time, standing up and sliding over to Naruto's side. Holding the bingo book, open to the picture of Orochimaru's face on it, in front of Naruto's eyes, he nudged his friend and lover. "Ooh, Naru-channn!" Sasuke cooed.
Naruto's eyes cracked open and he let out a scream, ducking under his towel and shaking. Sasuke let out a short laugh, slightly amused by the shaking blob in front of him. His kitsune could be so much fun to torture. Placing the book on top of the blanket, he poked at the blob. "Ya know, he's on you now." the Uchiha informed calmly.
Naruto jolted up, sending towel and book tumbling to the ground. He tried to bolt and ended up tripping over the towel he'd just dropped, sending himself careening into the floor. There was a loud clang and Sasuke stared at the body of his now unconscious friend. Right beside his friend's skull was a metal sparring pole, gleaming innocently in the light from the windows.
"Um…" The Uchiha grabbed his friend and dragged him towards a nearby closet. Looking back down at his friend, he saw blood staining the golden locks. Grabbing a first aid kit from the closet, the raven wrapped up the boy's head. Seeing as Sasuke hadn't much skill with healing, or with wrapping anything other than his own arms and legs, the result made Naruto's head look mummified. "All… better…?" he said, looking a bit confused.
While staring down at the little blond in his arms, Sasuke felt a light stirring. Blinking, he saw the teen's face scrunch up slightly, then his eyes weakly slid open. The blue orbs were hazed over, trying weakly to focus on the dark teen above him. The small mouth opened, and weak words came out.
"Who… who are you?"
1 - My hope as for what Sasuke really went to Orochimaru for. I mean really. Who could ever trust a guy who made himself immortal by incasing himself in other people, looks like a snake, and seems to have thrill in causing children pain?
2 - In the rare case you have no clue what I am talking about, I'm refferring to Kabuto. Not Karin, Kabuto.
And this is where I end it. Just for a cliffy. And because I still have to write up the entire rest of this story… --nervous laugh-- Anyways! This is not from our roleplay boards, and it is actually from a chat Ah-chan and I had over IM, which ended up in roleplay. The whole thing started when she got this crazy awesome idea for an AMV for Zenkaikon 2009, involving Orochimaru singing in the shower. So, I, not being a big fan of freaky, snake men singing in showers, spazzed, and we ended up into roleplay. Currently, I'm working on a fan art for the next installment of this short little crack fic.
Next time, on Memory Loss: "Your master." "Mas…ter?" "I want a less perverted mind." "Per…verted?" Catch this and more… next time…
--evil grin—I'll let that just sink it… think what you want… we're not telling what happens.
Hope you enjoyed the first part of Memory Loss!!! Read and Review please!!!
Da-kun
