"Admiral on the bridge," someone shouted.
"Status report," Reginald ordered.
"Approaching the Borg fleet. We will engage them in less than an hour. Damn! that's a lot of cubes," his tactical officer nervously replied.
"Relax lieutenant. Open a channel to all Starfleet ships," Reginald ordered.
"Channel open," his communications officer replied.
Reginald addressed the fleet he commanded. It was the largest fleet of ships Starfleet ever assembled. "To all ships: as you know, our mission is to destroy the Borg fleet approaching Earth and then rescue the crew of the Enterprise, who are stranded on the planet below after having to abandon their ship. As hopeless as this seems, follow the battle plan I gave you and we shall prevail. Admiral Barclay out."
The battle lasted six hours with the loss of many Federation ships and lives, but in the end, Reginald thought to himself, his unique and brilliant plan was a success: the Borg fleet was destroyed and the crew of the Enterprise was rescued. Of greater importance to Starfleet, the mission resulted in the likely salvation of Earth and the Federation from being assimilated by the Borg.
"You commanded the fleet with the confidence and courage I knew you always had, Reginald," Deanna Troi remarked. "Today, you saved the entire Federation. You should be very proud of yourself"
"Oh, just shut up and take off your clothes," Reginald replied. After several hours of passionate lovemaking, Reginald Barclay checked the time and saw that his duty shift was soon approaching. Reluctantly, he put his clothes back on and said to no one in particular:
"Computer, end program."
