Sleepless Nights in Konoha: Iruka

This was one of these nights when he just couldn't fall asleep. So he sat there, on the roof of his apartment, staring at the night landscape of Konoha spreading out in front of him. He didn't check the time, it didn't really matter. It must have been late though, most of the windows were dark, and the curtains in the windows of most houses were drawn.

He felt alone. Again. Since his childhood, since the day his parents died, these nights would come when he just couldn't sleep. When he felt so alone it was almost like suffocating. When younger he tried many things: going out, alcohol, a good book, a cheap movie, chocolate, none of it ever worked, not really. Recently he tried something else – work. He no longer only taught at the academy. He volunteered for extra work taking in reports (it was such numbing work) and took on as many missions as he could squeeze into his tight schedule. This had been rather helpful, he was so busy he didn't have time for being depressed. Or so he thought. In fact he somehow still managed to have these sleepless nights. Like this one. So in the end he remained with the simplest cure, sitting on the roof of his apartment, an staring, staring, staring. He didn't really see much, his mind was partly numb and he rarely focused his eyes on anything in particular. Sometimes he would watch the dark silhouettes of the villagers in the windows of the houses which were still lit. On one hand it was soothing, but on the other it made him feel even more lonesome. The families filled him with a feeling of… it was hard to define the feeling… resentment... He would watch bitterly as the dark silhouettes of parents tucked the kids in and turned of the lights.

Now there were hardly any windows lit. Even in the Hokage's home it was dark. It was silent too. He could hear the melody of his own breathing, and the rhythm of his heart. He knew how to slow it down. His mother had taught him, it helped numb out the pain, she said. But tonight he didn't have to, he felt so calm, that any slower and he'd fall asleep. Forever.

He sighed. Time to go to bed. Tomorrow it's lessons again he tried reasoning with himself. Tonight however, the rational part of him had little to say. Tonight, though it wasn't supposed to be so when one was a ninja, he was all emotion. So he stayed.

He didn't know how long he sat there, listening to the silence. Perhaps it wasn't even that long, but he had been feeling lonelier and emptier with every second. That was the way it usually went, finally he would reach a point when he just couldn't feel lonelier, or emptier, and he would take a deep breath, and then he would climb inside through the open window and fall asleep on the couch. The next day despite the fact he was weary he would be back to his normal, smiling self (though perhaps slightly more irritable then of usual, lack of sleep may do that to a man).

So he sat on the roof and sank deeper and deeper into the emptiness, waiting for the feeling to finally wear out, when the even sound of his breath was drowned by something louder. Footsteps.

He looked below him at the little streets, and sure enough there was a lone figure walking lightly through the empty street. He watched intently, trying to decipher who it was. The walk looked slightly familiar, but…Kakashi? Well, he did walk in a carefree way, but not as…happy. Genma maybe. Iruka didn't know who it was. Then, to his astonishment, the person started whistling. It was a happy tune, and the persons steps began to fall into rhythm with the melody. It could not be called a dance, but is wasn't plain walking either.

Iruka drew a deep breath and looked up at the moon, then around him once more, at the sleeping Konoha that stretched out below him and was tainted silver in the moonlight. Really, he thought as the whistling continued (though the sound was somewhat stifled by the distance), it was quite a beautiful world, after all.