A Wish for Normality

By Andruindel

Always it was the same. She woke every morning to pain. But it was more than physical pain; it was emotional, reaching her very soul. Every day she woke up alone, and she was alone until Vexen came. Vexen was her only company. It was he who had given her life. Or so he said.

Vexen had dubbed her Chilly, for a Chilly was what she was. A chilly was a mix between a Werewolf and a Vampire. That was what Vexen told her. According to Vexen, she needed blood, though she did not crave it. At midnight, every night, she transformed into a fierce, blood-thirsty beast, neither human, nor anything else.

Chilly had only known life for a few weeks. She was told she had been created to be sixteen. When she looked in a mirror, she saw a tall, slim girl, a frail little thing, with eyes full of sorrow and the shadow of what she truly was in her face. Every mirror in her room had been shattered and sometimes she woke to find her hands cut and bleeding. At these times Vexen would bandage her hands, all the while whispering words of comfort. Chilly pretended to take new heart, but truly she hated Vexen at those times. His fake comfort was not needed. What she desired most was to be normal.

Sometimes, when the drive to be normal became too strong to withhold, she would disappear into her room and draw. Her drawings were mostly of her and a boy in different scenarios: Eating ice cream, walking at the park, swinging, and sometimes being chased by a swarm of heartless. But the stories she made up to go with her pictures always ended happily, with she and her friend smiling.

Her friend was blonde, like Vexen and he had blue-green eyes. His hair was shorter than Vexen's, and he was much nicer. He was quick to laugh, and always ready to smile.

Whenever Vexen found Chilly drawing, he would remark bitterly 'You'll never be normal, you know.' To which Chilly would reply, just as bitterly, 'I can always pretend.' Vexen would then stand her in front of a mirror and lecture her. His lecture was always the same. Chilly had heard it so many times she could remember every word of it. If anyone were to open her journal, every single page would be covered in Chilly's bold handwriting, reading something along the lines of:

"Chilly, I did not create you to be normal. I created you to be just what you are: A Chilly. Part Vampire, part Werewolf. Neither of those things is normal, so you, being both, have no hope of ever being normal. You were designed to kill, Chilly, and create Chillers. Your minions of Darkness are going to help me very much."

Vexen would go on like that until her chest was heaving with suppressed sobs, and her eyes were sparkling with unshed tears. Forced to look at her reflection, she was both enraptured and revolted by the beast contained inside her. When Vexen saw that his lecture had taken effect, he would leave Chilly to her violent devices, which usually included the smashing of any mirrors Vexen had bothered replacing while sobbing brokenly.

During one such painful episode, as Chilly sat sobbing on the floor and using a shard of mirror to leave thin cuts on her wrists and arms, she heard the door open. Assuming it was Vexen, Chilly carried on with her self-abuse. If she couldn't be normal by being happy, she could be normal by feeling pain…

"Uh, are you alright..?" The voice was not Vexen's. It was too soft, too gentle, and too full of concern. Chilly whirled around, preparing to scream at whoever had disturbed her. But before she could even think of what to say, she stopped. The stranger who had interrupted her rage was so nearly identical to her drawing friend; she was too shocked to do anything. She simply sat there, clutching a shard of glass, bleeding, and staring in open awe at her drawing made real.

The boy who stood in her doorway was just about her age. He had dirty-blonde hair, which was spiked messily, with a few wisps hanging in front of his eyes. His eyes were a deep, blue-green, and open wide. He wore a cloak similar to the one Vexen wore.

"Are you okay?" He asked again, taking a step further into the room.

Chilly suddenly looked away from him, down at her own hands. She was embarrassed and ashamed to be caught hurting herself by her drawing. "I'm alright…" She said softly. "I just… Who are you?" She had to know his name.

The boy appeared reluctant to change the subject so soon. He stared at her blood-soaked hands for a moment longer before answering. "I'm Demyx." He said, and he ventured a step closer. "Who are you?"

Chilly dropped the shard of mirror and climbed to her feet. She was so overjoyed to see her friend at last, that it almost overshadowed her indignity. "My name is Chilly." She said, and she sounded a bit more defensive than she had meant. "Hasn't Vexen told you about me?" She was a bit disturbed at the thought that Vexen was keeping her a secret.

Demyx shook his head. "No…" He said, softly. "Are you one of his…Experiments?" He uttered the one word as though it might scald him if he uttered it too loudly.

Chilly glanced away from the blonde, a portion of her recent rage returning. "Yes." She said shortly, and this time she meant to sound defensive.

Demyx came another hesitant step closer. "Can I ask you something?" He asked, and his soft tone had Chilly calm again. Just like she had imagined. She nodded, and Demyx went on. "Is that why you were cutting yourself?" He sounded so genuinely concerned that Chilly couldn't help trusting him. She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear while nodding, and that's when she realized again that her hands were covered in blood.

The blonde came closer, and reached for her hand. "Shouldn't you take care of this?" He asked.

Chilly instinctively pulled away, almost immediately regretting her action. Demyx looked a bit hurt at her mistrust. Lowering her hand, Chilly nodded slowly. "I'll be right back…" She said, and she headed toward the bathroom. She heard Demyx following her.

"Do you need any help?" He asked.

Chilly considered for a moment. Bandaging her hands had always been Vexen's job… Yet she had despised him for it… Some how, she didn't think she could let Demyx take that place.

"No... Thank you…" She said, uttering two words she had never used in her life. Vexen had never deserved her respect. Indeed, he had never asked for it. Chilly gave Demyx a bright smile before continuing into the bathroom where she rinsed her hands liberally under the sink. She could hear Demyx in her room, apparently cleaning up some of the glass. In a few minutes Chilly went back into her room, and stared hungrily at Demyx, trying to memorize every aspect of his appearance, so she could draw him better in the future.

The blonde looked up after a moment, and blushed when he saw her watching him. "What?" He asked, shifting nervously.

Chilly smiled. "I want to show you something." She said. She caught his hand, and pulled him toward her bed. She felt him pull back minutely, but when she dropped his hand and lowered herself to her knees to dig around under the bed, he relaxed. After some rummaging she pulled a sketchbook out from under the bed and riffled through it fondly. "Here," She said, handing to him. "Look." He did so, hesitantly. Chilly smiled at him. He seemed so nice, just like he had in her imagination. She watched as he flipped slowly through the book, a look of awe on his face. She knew that her expression upon meeting him must have looked much the same.

"Is this me?" Demyx broke the stillness in a hushed tone. Chilly liked the way his eyes were wide with disbelief.

She nodded, and could almost feel the sparkles that must have been in her eyes. 'I think this is destiny!" She said, her tone hushed. She always kept her voice low and reverent when speaking of such things. "I've been drawing these pictures over the course of a few months, long before I knew you existed… Do you believe in fate?"

Demyx looked up from a picture of him and Chilly swinging at the park. He nodded slowly, never breaking eye-contact. Chilly could feel herself wanting to look away, to break the gaze, but she couldn't. His eyes held her spell-bound, like the ocean locked forever in two, sparkling orbs.

The blonde set the book aside, and sat on the bed. Chilly hesitantly sat beside him. After a moment they began talking. Demyx asked Chilly about herself, and in return Chilly asked about him, and the rest of the Organization. It was then that she found that she and her drawing really did have a lot in common. Demyx was just as misunderstood and unhappy as Chilly was. But, instead of resorting to physical pain, Demyx bore it all with a smile. Chilly smiled at the thought that Demyx may look and act a lot like her drawing, but he was still different.

After a while, Demyx asked Chilly about Vexen. Chilly turned away from him to glare at the floor. She could feel tears stinging her eyes as she thought of Vexen, and what he told her routinely. "He says I'll never be normal…" She said softly, glancing once at Demyx.

She heard Demyx shift his position, and then felt a hand on her shoulder. "Vexen told you that?" He asked. Chilly nodded her response, not trusting her voice. Demyx shifted closer, and Chilly instinctively drew a short way away. "You're more normal than I am. You have the ability to cry, to feel emotion. I don't have that ability... Not even Vexen has that ability."

Chilly took considerable comfort from his words. It was so strange, talking to someone who was not Vexen. She scrubbed a hand across her eyes, and then looked up at Demyx, smiling. "Thanks…"

They talked for hours after that, and Chilly all but forgot her earlier misery. Chilly knew immediately that she and Demyx were going to be great friends. She was so at ease around him, it was like they had known each other for years. She could tell him things without the fear of being laughed at. At the same time, she could listen to him without being bored. Chilly was so caught up in their conversation that she didn't hear a noise announcing Vexen's return.

"My, my… what have we here?" The Chilly Academics voice sent thrills of terror down Chilly's spine. She saw Demyx staring over her shoulder in horror. Turning slowly, she guiltily met Vexen's gaze. He was frowning. She felt Demyx shift beside her, but never took her eyes off Vexen.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" She cried, feeling a righteous anger burning inside her. "You've seen my drawings, why didn't you tell me he was real?" Her hands had clenched into fists, and she glared hard at Vexen, waiting for an answer.

An answer did not come. Vexen looked to Demyx, who seemed to shrink under his fierce gaze. "Get out," Vexen said icily, and Demyx fled the scene, throwing an apprehensive look over his shoulder at Chilly as he went. Chilly watched him leave, and then turned an angry gaze on Vexen. He had no right to send her friend away like that.

"Well?!" She demanded, feeling that if she didn't get an answer soon, she would explode into a tremendous rage. "Why did you never tell me?"

Vexen stared right back at her, his green eyes flashing in a very warning way. Chilly had always regarded that warning with caution and slight fear. But this time she ignored it, and glared fiercely at her creator in open defiance.

When finally Vexen spoke, it was in the same, bitter tone he used when referring to her drawings. "Number Nine has many dangerous ideas. I did not want him putting those ideas into your mind."

Chilly was filled with such hatred for Vexen at that moment that she could not express it. She merely glared at him, watching as he crossed her room to the door. "I forbid you to see him ever again." Vexen said with an air of finality. With that he strode through the door, closing it behind him.

Determined to have the last word, Chilly dashed to the door, opened it and shouted "I hate you!" Without even waiting to see Vexen's reaction, she slammed the door shut, and locked it. Then, shaking, she threw herself down on her bed and cried. Eventually she fell asleep, exhausted.

The next days passed in a feverish blur for Chilly. Filled with an angry rebellion, she stayed in her room with the door locked. Whenever Vexen took the time to portal into her room, she escaped into the bathroom and refused to come out. He tried persuading her, he tried threatening her, and he tried once to force her, but she would not cooperate. She hardly ate; she slept less, for she was dwelling on Demyx, and what he had told her.

She was actually more normal than Vexen. Was that why he had tried so hard to squash any thought of normality out of her mind? Perhaps he wanted to keep her as downtrodden as possible, so as to keep her under control. Whatever his reasons, Chilly was not going down without a fight. On the rare occasion he did manage to get her out of her room, she fought tooth and claw to avoid undergoing any of the usual tests.

Claiming that the results would be more accurate if she did it of her own free will, Vexen would let her go. She would then stalk back to her room to brood. One thing that had come about from this situation was that Chilly no longer awoke cut and bleeding. Immensely relieved about that, she even ventured to look in a mirror. She no longer saw a tortured, haunted girl. She saw a girl gleaming with defiance, with dark shadows under her eyes. But underneath the signs of general neglect, there shone a glimmer of hope, and nothing could dull that hope.

Finally, after about a week of struggling with Chilly, Vexen condescended to pay her a visit. Expecting the worst, Chilly dove for her closet. Vexen was too fast for her. He caught her by the arm, and held fast while she struggled.

"Relax," He cried. "I just want to talk to you."

Ever wary, Chilly stopped struggling to glare defiantly at her creator. Vexen glared right back, his green eyes flashing. "I've decided that Demyx can come visit you, if…" Chilly waited with bated breath for Vexen to finish. "If you cooperate with me."

Chilly considered for a moment. With narrowed eyes, she stared at Vexen. She did not readily trust him. "You promise?" She asked mistrustfully. Vexen nodded, and Chilly shrugged. "Alright, I'll cooperate."

Vexen smiled wryly. "Good. I knew a nice compromise would work." He said. He gave Chilly a calculating look before sweeping out of her room.

After that, Chilly bore the experiments and tests without complaint, and was rewarded with visits from Demyx. Her blonde friend came several times a week, almost every day.

Demyx acted as some sort of tranquilizer for Chilly. When she was with him, she felt calm, happy and content with life. She laughed easily, and found herself talking freely. She had never talked much before, for Vexen was not as understanding as Demyx. Demyx was a good listening, and Chilly trusted that he would never laugh at her. Whenever Chilly looked at the numerous scars traced on her arms and wrists, she was reminded that those times of misery were past.

Several weeks passed in that happy fashion. Chilly was content. Her mind was filled with stories Demyx told her, all about the other members, and her heart was bursting with love for her new friend. She was ever at ease around Demyx, and nothing he said or did could make her angry. Chilly was far beyond anger, now. Not even Vexen on one of his worst days could push her into one of her rages. Her life was too good for that.

One day, Vexen failed to show up. Chilly was confused about that, for Vexen had never stayed away longer than one night. Nonplussed, Chilly wandered despondently around the lab, wondering what had happened to Vexen. Only when Demyx arrived did she find out.

"Vexen's on a mission." Demyx informed her while they sat on her bed. "He won't be back until tomorrow." His eyes were gleaming with mischief, and Chilly felt the beginnings of uncertainty pooling in her stomach. The blonde was full of pranks, this she knew from experience.

"You've never been out of the lab, have you?" Startled out of her thoughts, Chilly looked up to meet Demyx's gaze before nodding slowly. Demyx's eyes lit up. "Then I think you should live a little. Come on," He held out his hand, while with the other hand, he created a portal of darkness. Chilly hesitated for a split second, looking from Demyx to the portal. Then she grasped his hand, and followed him into the darkness.

The sensation was an unpleasant one. She felt as though she were being forced through a space far too small for her. Weight was pushing on her from all sides, constricting her breathing. Panicking, she squeezed Demyx's hand, and felt him return the squeeze. After what seemed an eternity, the sensation lifted, and Chilly found herself outside. She stumbled, unfamiliar with the feeling of portalling, but Demyx caught her.

Looking around, Chilly saw that they were at a park, just like she had drawn. She looked to Demyx, her eyes shining, and saw that he was grinning. "Let's go swing!" He cried happily, and he dashed off to the swing set. Chilly followed at a run, sat on the swing, and pushed off the ground hard with her feet. She heard Demyx laughing, but she was intent on the sensation of flying she got from the swing. When she focused on the sky above her, she could very well have been flying. The freedom it expressed was unbelievable.

After a while, Chilly slowed to a stop, and watched Demyx swinging slowly back and forth. He looked happy, just like any little boy who had gotten his wish to visit the park. Chilly had never seen this side of Demyx before. She knew he was care-free and happy-go-lucky, but his inner child was surprisingly near the surface. She found it amusing, and cute, and smiled.

"You wanna go get ice cream?" Demyx asked suddenly, looking up. Chilly let her eyes widen in surprise at his sudden question, and then nodded, smiling. Demyx grinned, and got up. "Let's go." He said, once again holding his hand out to Chilly. She took it more willingly this time, and let him lead her into the darkness again. The sensation was no more comfortable the second time and she squeezed Demyx's hand tightly. Once again he returned the squeeze, comforting her more than words could have.

Chilly stumbled as they exited the portal, and felt Demyx's arms steadying her. She looked up at him, and smiled. She had never imagined that the outside world could be so wonderful. Demyx returned the smile, and pulled her toward an ice cream stand. There were so many flavors, Chilly didn't know what to pick! Finally she let Demyx decide for her. Ice cream was a completely new experience for her, but she enjoyed it immensely. While they ate their ice cream, the two friends walked side by side, talking. They talked of nothing and everything.

Soon, too soon for Chilly's liking, the day was coming to an end. The sun was sinking slowly, bathing the world below it in twilit glory. Chilly raised her eyes to the sky, and watched the clouds changing almost imperceptibly from white, to orange, to pink, to purple. Then, as the sun was sinking slowly below the rim of the world, and the sky was darkening to a deep, royal blue, she felt Demyx take her hand again and tug gently. Looking up at the blonde, she saw his smile, and his eyes sparkling.

"Come on, I know a great place where we can watch the moon rise." He pulled her into yet another dark portal, and this time Chilly was nearly used to the sensation. But it was still unpleasant. When they stepped out of the portal, Chilly looked around, and shivered lightly. They were standing on a hill over-looking the ocean. The wind rushing past them was salty; Chilly could almost taste it on her lips. The moon was rising slowly already, though the darkness was not quite complete. The darkness was invading the ocean; deep blue seemed to hide many secrets; the enigma of it sent shivers down Chilly's spine.

Together the two friends stood looking out over the ocean, still holding hands. The scene was so peaceful, and tranquil, it seemed a shame to break the spell by speaking. Presently, Demyx did, though.

"Come on, there's a bench over there." He indicated the bench with a jerk of his chin, and they strolled leisurely toward it, still hand in hand. Chilly felt no need to break the grip, for it was normal for her to hold Demyx's hand. It was simply a companionable gesture. The bench was stone and chilly as the two sat on it. Chilly shivered lightly, and scooted a tiny bit toward Demyx. The blonde glanced sideways at her, and then put an arm around her shoulders.

"Cold?" He asked, squeezing her in a one-armed hug. Chilly simply nodded, and watched as the moon rose higher and higher. Coincidently, it was a full moon that night, and the light emanating from it illuminated the whole world below. Chilly glanced at Demyx, and saw the light reflected in his eyes, making them match the ocean they so closely resembled even more than they did normally. Chilly smiled, pleased to be with her friend on such a beautiful night, rather than stuck in the lab with Vexen. Speaking of Vexen, Chilly couldn't keep from chuckling at the thought of what he would say if he knew she had gone out. He had never allowed her out of the lab, for even a second. The first time she had ventured out the door, by only a foot, he had punished her severely.

"What's so funny?" Demyx nudged her lightly as he broke the stillness yet again.

Chilly smiled up at him. "Vexen would simply kill me if he knew about tonight." She said, in such a matter of fact voice Demyx raised an eyebrow.

"That's precisely why he won't find out." Demyx replied, and he leaned down to kiss her brow. It was such a genuinely friendly gesture that it felt completely natural. There was nothing behind it, only friendship, and Chilly felt that she was lucky to have such a friend as Demyx. Situating herself so her back was to the blonde, she looked out at the horizon again, watching the moon rise by fractions of an inch for a long stretch of silence.

A sudden yawn caused Chilly to realize just how tired she was. The excitement of the day, coupled with the walking and swinging she had done that day were proving a bit much for her. Snuggling closer to Demyx, she wrapped an arm around him, and yawned again.

"Tired…?" Demyx's voice was soft and soothing. Simply nodding, Chilly closed her eyes and let sleep over take her. She knew she was safe while Demyx was near.

Chilly woke several hours later, unsure where she was. She shivered, and sat up, looking around. It was dark, and smelled of moth balls. Standing slowly, Chilly groped around in the darkness, and soon found that she was inside her own closet. She frowned, and opened the door, blinking at the blinding white-ness of her room. Several things were out of place, and large gouges littered the walls around the doors. Unsure what was going on, Chilly paced toward her door, and peered out into the lab, where Vexen was picking up shards of shattered glass. At a closer look, they proved to be shards of mirror.

Dread was pooling in Chilly's stomach, and she shivered again. "What happened..?" She asked, and Vexen looked up at her.

"You went out last night." Vexen said, his voice accusing.

Chilly was taken aback. She reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, avoiding Vexen's eyes. He knew. But how did he know? "How did you know?" She asked. It was no good lying. She had tried before, and it didn't work.

Vexen's eyes were cold, icier than Chilly had ever seen them. She flinched as he drew near, grasping her shoulder and leading her back into her room. Her mirror was still intact, but several smears of blood stained it. Revolted, Chilly forced herself to look past the blood and at her reflection. What she saw made her want to throw up everything she'd eaten for the past five days.

Her face, arms and hands were stained with blood. Blood had dried in her hair, and was staining her clothing as well. How she had not noticed before was a mystery to Chilly.

"Tell me truly, did you go out last night?" Vexen asked. He stood behind Chilly, his hand still on her shoulder.

Chilly turned to face him, fear gripping her heart like an icy hand. "Yes." She said softly. "Demyx took me out…" She lowered her eyes to avoid Vexen's gaze, and realized that she was shaking.

Vexen said nothing for a moment. When he spoke, his voice was low. "Have I not told you countless times what you are? Have I not beaten into you the fact that you are a monster? Look at yourself!" He turned her around, and forced her to look into the mirror. "You could have killed anyone, anyone at all, and you would not have known it. Now, some innocent soul lies dead where you left them, and we have lost the possibility of a Chiller. You could have ruined all my plans!" Chilly's eyes filled with tears at the realization of what she had done. But what hurt her most of all was the thought of what she could have done to Demyx. She turned to Vexen again.

"Is Demyx…?" She got no further, for Vexen struck her across the face, sending her to the floor. He had never hit her before, and it shocked her more than it hurt. But still, tears welled in her eyes, and she let out a broken sob.

"Demyx is fine." Vexen snarled. "But now, thanks to him, my plans have nearly been ruined. I was right to keep you two apart. You are never to see him again!"

He left then, leaving Chilly to lie on the floor sobbing. Eventually she crawled onto her bed and curled up into a ball, still crying. She could have hurt Demyx, without realizing. That disturbed her more than the thought of the innocent she had mauled while in her Chilly form. Soon her sobs subsided, and she lay on her bed, limp and still. She was hovering somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. After some time, she got up, and went to wash, for she could not stand the smell of dried blood on her. Then she crawled into bed and fell asleep.

A crash woke her some time later, and she sat bolt upright. Demyx was standing guiltily in the middle of her room, and seemed to have knocked something over. He motioned quickly for Chilly to be quiet, and made his way cautiously toward her bed. He sat on the edge of the bed, and stared at his clasped hands for a moment. Carefully, Chilly crawled out from under the blankets and sat next to him.

"Where's Vexen?" She asked, quietly in case Vexen was near.

"He's on another mission." Demyx said quietly. "I came to apologize." The blonde took a deep breath, but before he could say any more, Chilly had covered his mouth with a gentle hand.

"You're not to blame…" She said softly. Something she'd been holding in was about to come forth. It was time… "It's my fault, really… For not telling you what I am. No, listen." Demyx closed his mouth again, and gazed silently at her. Chilly hesitated for a moment, gathering her thoughts, and then went on. "I could have hurt you last night, and simply because I didn't tell you… I'm a monster… I'm sorry, Demyx." She looked up at Demyx again, her eyes full of tears, and he turned his head, perhaps intentionally letting her see the gash across his cheek.

"But I shouldn't have taken you out… I knew we could get in serious trouble… So, I'm sorry, too." Demyx said, a hint of pleading in his voice. Chilly's heart went out to the miserable blonde before her. "Vexen's angry, huh..?"

Chilly nodded slowly. "How did you know..?"

Demyx lifted a hand and slowly brushed a finger across her cheek. "You've got one heck of a bruise…" He said, and he gave her a crooked smile. Chilly pursed her lips, and then reached up to finger the bruise. It was true, Vexen had hit her hard, but she hadn't thought he'd hit her that hard.

"He says I can never see you again..." Chilly whispered. She could feel the tears threatening to spill, but was determined not to let them fall. Demyx reached out and took her hand, squeezing gently.

"We can still see each other, secretly." He said firmly, and his eyes shone with determination. "I just won't take you out again!" His attempt at cheering her up had quite an opposite affect. Chilly tried to smile, but failed, and burst into tears.

"What's wrong?" He cried, pulling her into his arms as he did so. "Chilly…"

"I don't deserve your friendship…" Chilly sobbed, trying to speak coherently. She buried her face in Demyx's chest, feeling his arms tighten around her. "I hurt you, Demyx… I didn't know it, but I hurt you. How can you forgive that?" A hand reached up to stroke her hair, and Demyx rested his chin on the crown of her head. For a moment he did not answer, and Chilly wondered if he had heard her. Pulling back, Chilly gazed at Demyx through tear filled eyes, and saw that he was smiling sadly.

"Last night, you did hurt me…" He said softly, and took her hand again. "But you didn't kill me… I think, if I hadn't asked you not to, you would have… So, it just goes to show that, even in your… other form, you still care for me…" He smiled, and leaned in to kiss her brow, just like he had hours ago as they sat on the stone bench watching the moon rise.

Chilly smiled, and reached up to run a hand through Demyx's hair. "Thanks, Demyx…" She said softly. Her words were greeted with a smile, and another squeeze of her hand. Then, Chilly heard a noise out in the lab. "You should probably go, unless you know when Vexen's going to be back…" She tilted her head to one side, watching as Demyx shook his head.

"He's supposed to be back by tomorrow, but it's not definite." He stood, and headed toward the door. "I'll see you some other time, then…." He said, a bit awkwardly. "It'll be hard to hang out now, though…" Shrugging his thin shoulders, the blonde left her room, more quietly than he had entered, and left Chilly to resume her nap, much more at peace with herself.

The next few weeks passed miserably for Chilly. Vexen was cold to her, colder than usual, and he never left her alone if he could help it. Chilly spent her days curled on her bed, thinking deep thoughts. And Vexen spent his days testing Chilly for various reasons. One day, after going through a particularly painful test, Chilly stayed to watch Vexen analyze the information. She had never done such a thing before, but today, he seemed to much more excited than usual, she just had to find out why.

"Yes," Vexen exclaimed suddenly, and Chilly jumped. "Yes! It's finally ready!"

Raising an eyebrow, Chilly watched as Vexen accidentally scattered papers everywhere as he stood. She leaned down to pick one up, and two bold words met her eyes. "Subject Ready" and then, underneath that, in less bold letters, 'Operation Organization Revolution' Chilly felt a chill creep down her spine, but then the paper was snatched from her hand. She raised her eyes to meet Vexen's cold gaze.

"You're using me to take over the Organization…" Chilly whispered, afraid of what the answer was. "You need my Chillers to help you, but you won't be able to if I don't make Chillers!" She stood up, clenching her fists in anger as she glared at Vexen.

Vexen shook his head. "Perhaps Number Nine got to you more than I expected…" He said softly. "His dangerous ideas have indeed affected your mind."

Chilly frowned. "And you suppose taking over the Organization is not a dangerous idea? You could die!" It was not that she cared for his life. He had caused her too much pain for that, but if he died, she was bound to die also.

Vexen laughed, sending tingles down her spine. "And you assume that I am doing this alone! No, some of the other members are helping me. Alas, your Demyx is not one of them. Perhaps I'll be able to kill him when he opposes us on Xemnas's orders." He laughed again, and Chilly clenched her hands so tightly her nails dug into the palms, making her bleed.

"You could never kill Demyx." She snarled. "One like you could never snuff out some one like Demyx." Vexen stopped laughing, and frowned. But Chilly was too angry to be wary of the warning in his eyes. "Demyx is twice the man you'll ever be!" She shouted, and she saw Vexen's hand twitch. "And if you dare try to use me as a weapon, I swear you'll never see me again!"

"Chilly, Chilly, you simply do not understand." Vexen said softly. "If I control the Chilly, I control the Chillers… And, I do, in fact, control you."

Realizing the truth of his words, Chilly spun on her heel and marched into her room, slamming the door hard behind her. Her future was now clear to her. And she wondered, as she lay on her bed staring at the ceiling, was there any way to change it?

"Chilly!" Chilly groaned, and turned over, unwilling to wake. She was having a beautiful dream. Grumbling rebelliously, she buried her head under the covers and tried to recapture the dream. Something about she and Demyx having a party… "Chilly!!" A hand shook her shoulder, and she groaned again.

"Go away…" She mumbled sleepily. She was not ready to wake and face reality yet. Dreams were peaceful, and that in itself was enough to make her want to sleep forever. For reality could not reach her in her sleep.

"Chilly, please…" The words were uttered softly, but they served the purpose just as well, perhaps better than the urgent calls of before.

Rolling over onto her back, Chilly cracked her eyes open and met Demyx's blue gaze. He was sitting on the edge of her bed, leaning over her to gaze full into her face. "Demyx…? What's wrong?" She sat up, and ran a hand through her hair. As she watched Demyx, she saw that he was shaking, and fidgeting nervously. His hands were never still, as he fingered her comforter. He glanced once at her, before standing and beginning to pace back and forth across the floor.

"I've got a mission…" He said slowly. "They want me to destroy the Keyblade Master… But…" He fell silent, and Chilly, feeling dread knot painfully in her stomach, slid out of bed to stand, and watched as Demyx kept pacing. "But I think they mean for me to fail…" Demyx finished at last. Chilly had never seen Demyx so distressed. He kept glancing at her, and then looking away again to stare at his feet. Finally, Chilly could stand it no longer, and reached out to touch his arm lightly.

"You mean…" She hesitated, unsure how to say what she longed to. "You mean they mean you to be... killed…?" The last word came out as a whisper, and only with much effort.

Demyx stopped, and glanced down at her hand on his arm. His eyes were dark, and smoldering with something Chilly had never seen in them before. "Yes," He said, and his voice held conviction. "Yes, I think they mean me to fail, and be killed… Chilly, I think I can succeed, if you give me your strength."

Chilly was not sure what he meant. She reached out and touched his cheek gently, meeting his deep blue eyes. "What do you mean?"

Demyx smiled lightly. "I mean, if I know you're rooting for me, I think I can do it…" He said, and he ran a hand through her hair, brushing it back from her face. "So please, think of me while I'm out. I know I can do it…" He seemed to be trying to prove something to himself, rather than to her, but he smiled again.

Chilly tried to return his smile, and nodded. "I will, Demyx. I know you can do it… Just promise you come back…" She tried desperately to keep the tears in her eyes from falling. She would not let Demyx see her cry. She would be strong. For him…

Demyx smiled, and ruffled Chilly's hair. "See ya," He said, and he stepped backward into a portal. He disappeared instantly, without giving Chilly a chance to say good bye, or confide in him Vexen's plans for her future. The fear and disgust that consumed her whenever she thought of her future came at her full force then, as Demyx disappeared, and she lowered her head in defeat. Then, a whistle from behind her made her lift her head, and she turned to see Demyx, grinning.

"You didn't think I'd leave without saying good bye," He said brightly. Chilly smiled, and rushed at him, throwing herself into his arms. She hugged him tightly, and whispered three words against his chest. "Good bye, Demyx…" Demyx squeezed her, and stroked her hair lightly, before pulling away and stepping back.

"See ya," He said, and he gave her a quick thumbs up before disappearing once again into a portal. Chilly stood where she was, staring at the place where he had disappeared, and a single tear traveled down her cheek. For some, unexplained reason, she felt that she had seen Demyx for the last time.

Over the course of three days she thought nonstop of Demyx. She wondered where he was, what he was doing, and whether he was thinking of her. Several times she wondered if he knew that she was thinking of him. Surely, he would not fail his mission. He would return, smiling, and life would continue happily as it had before that night when they'd gone out. Surely Vexen must have noticed a change in her demeanor. She no longer struggled at all when he subjected her to tests, and she barely spoke to him, unless he asked her something. Even then, her answers were vague, and distant, as though she were addressing him from some distant realm. Vexen was confused, and nonplussed by her behavior, but he refrained from saying anything.

On the third day after Demyx had gone, Chilly wandered out of her room to see Vexen speaking with another man. The man had long, layered pink hair, and gray-blue eyes. His voice was charming, but his expression dour, and threatening. Chilly stood still, staring mistrustfully at him.

"Ah, this must be it." The strange man said, addressing Vexen while he stared at Chilly. "I must admit, it doesn't look like much." Chilly frowned, disliking the way the strange man referred to her as 'it'. Vexen noticed it as well, Chilly could tell by the icy look in his eyes, but he refrained from rebuking the other man.

"Yes, this is her." Vexen replied. "She's ready, but we should wait for a few more days before moving on in the plan. She must forget about Number Nine before we can do much more."

Something, a warning of some sort, entered Chilly's heart. She struggled to explain the warning inside her; it was an instinct, though to do what, she could not tell. "What do you mean 'forget about' him?" She asked, speaking a complete sentence for the first time in three days.

Vexen's eyes narrowed, but the other man laughed, and his laugh sent thrills of terror down Chilly's spine. "Surely Vexen told you you're beloved Demyx was defeated in battle yesterday." He said. There was no hint of remorse in his voice, simply an evil pleasure at bearing bad news.

Chilly opened her mouth, but words would not come. He couldn't mean. He didn't mean… "You mean… He's…" She managed to choke three words out, but the rest would not come. Tears threatened to over-whelm her as the reality struck her hard, like a physical blow to the stomach.

"Yes, the Keyblade Master finished him." The strange man said. "Demyx is no more."

Chilly let out a noise, somewhere between a scream and a howl. For once, she could feel the beast inside her trying to break loose. She was finally aware of what exactly she was, and that thought frightened and sickened her just as much as the thought of Demyx, dead. Before she could realize what she was doing, she had dashed forward, and struck the man as hard as she could. He stumbled, and let out an angry oath. Vexen leapt to his aid, but Chilly was already gone. She dashed to her room, closing and locking the door. She heard Vexen shouting angrily at her, but she did not care. All that mattered was that Demyx was gone.

That thought rushed around and around in her mind, giving her no peace as she glanced hurriedly around her room. Demyx was gone; nothing she did could bring him back. And Vexen was to blame for that. Angry that Demyx had put his 'dangerous ideas' into her head, the Chilly Academic had gotten Demyx killed. Chilly clung to that thought like a life-line, for it helped to be able to blame someone, something. More than anything she blamed this mysterious Keyblade Master, for separating her and Demyx forever.

Their friendship had always been opposed, and now, they were never to see each other again. Vexen had succeeded in preventing their friendship. There remained only one thing to be done. Glancing once around her room, Chilly located a mirror that remained intact. Without a second thought, she threw it to the floor, effectively smashing it. She knew Vexen would suspect nothing, for he was used to her smashing her mirrors. She knelt to pick up one of the larger shards of mirror, and lifted it to her wrist. She hesitated for one minute, thinking over her choice.

What was life without her one and only friend? Only being used for Vexen's purposes: Taking over the Organization, making Chillers. No. That may have been her future once, but now, now she had no future. Hesitating no longer, she lifted the shard and brought it against the sensitive skin of the inside of her wrist. She drew the shard gently across her wrist, leaving one, long cut. The effect was immediate. Blood gushed from the small wound, and Chilly could feel life slowly leaving her.

She slumped sideways to the floor, and already her vision was fading. The loss of blood would surely kill her. But she cared for life no longer. As she lay bleeding on the floor, waiting for life to leave her, a vision of Demyx invaded her mind. He was standing with his back to her, but looking over his shoulder with an expectant smile on his face. Yes, she would join him soon enough and they would be free to be friends. Free to be together, where no one could ever stop her.

Hours later, Vexen entered her room only to find her lying dead on the floor. It was obvious what she had done, from the amount of blood, and the shard of mirror in her hand. Yet, instead of a frown, or a look of misery, she had a smile on her face, a smile of pure bliss, and sheer joy. Confused, Vexen knelt beside his creation, and pondered. Even in death she had been happy. Now, she was undoubtedly with Demyx, where he could no longer reach them.