Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to this, just a fun little story that you might want to read. Thank you if you are reading it!

A few thanks before you get to reading, thank you to The Warrior Of Twilight for reigniting my passion to write, he writes amazing stories, better than what I will ever write. His amazing story "A Journey Beyond Sanity" has inspired to do something similar, so there a couple of similarities here and there.

That's all. On with the story!


Ouch… my head.

Not much of a surprise for me, but it still sucks that I wake up immediately in pain.

Seriously, I hate headaches…

Well, this is going to be a great day… I thought, clearly bitter by the fact I started off my morning with a headache. My eyes were still closed, trying to get more shuteye before I have to go to class. I try to relax to avoid getting a migraine and hopefully go back to sleep. A lot of people try to count sheep, listen to music, or visualize a peaceful scenario to calm themselves down for slumber. Not me though. I go static. Any other idea tends to distract me, aside from a small white noise, to which I find that the ambiance is plenty soothing and at a low volume.

To no avail though. I can't relax enough with this pain. I need something. Aspirin. Tylenol. Hell, Excedrin would really help right now. I muster enough strength to get up and get my way to some painkillers, and avoid opening my eyes. Any light would increase the pain tenfold.

I reach over to grab my glasses, but for some reason can't reach to where my nightstand is. Funny, last I checked, it was still right next to the damn bed. Ah, I don't need them. I was just going to take some Excedrin and maybe grab something cold to put on my head and neck.

My body feels worse for the wear. I find crawling is the only comfortable way to get around. Why am in so much pain? I asked myself. What could I possibly have done last night? I don't do much, maybe some basketball here and there, but nothing too major. I'm not a person to take huge risks like skydiving or cliff jumping, so some massive pain throughout my whole body threw me off. But the sooner I get some medicine in me, the better. Slowly, I inch my way over to my bedroom door, and prepare myself for the blinding of the century, as the huge window to my right brings in a lot of sunlight.

Instead what I do is bump into a wall.

I open my eyes immediately. Right where my door should be instead lies a wall. Was my room boarded up? I turn around and analyze this even further. Where was everything? My posters, desk, computer, TV, my Xbox and PlayStation, dresser; it's all gone…

More importantly, where was my bed? What was I sleeping on? I walk over, my headache amplified with this confusion, and check it out. Well, this was no bed. A tarp and dirt is not my bed. I look around. Tools, hay bales, tarps, wood planks: this is a barn. Why am I in a barn?

One long since abandoned…

Rusty tools, degraded hay bales, torn-apart tarps, and broken wood planks accurately convey the atmosphere.

A bit worried and confused, I back out of the worn-down building. What the hell is going on? I thought. Why was I in a barn? Finding the door, I open it and am instantly blinded by the intense light. The ringing in my head resonates deeply and loudly.

Ouch… why do I feel so… lightheaded…?


Feeling regained. I see the trees now. A bit blurry, but I can still tell. I turn around and the barn is still there. Did I just pass out? From pain? That's a first, even for me. After that confused state, I finally get back on track.

Location. I thought. I need to see if I can find out where I am.

Still a bit weak from that strange occurrence with the sun, I stood up to get a look at my surroundings, but only for a good ten seconds, because I was stopped by excruciating pain in my legs. Writhing in pain, I attempted to cradle my leg, but couldn't for some reason. I couldn't reach it. Were my arms worse for the wear? Everything seems to be working against me. I thought. My head, my arms, my conscious, and now to think of it: literally everything. It certainly got my mind off my headache. And this barn. And everything else for that matter. God, this really hurts…

"What the hell's going on?" I ask myself. "Why is this happening?" Two questions that I can't answer.

Finally, the pain subsides and I can get up. Even though crawling might look normal to others, it's best not to try standing up again. I need to find some sort of mirror. How messed up am I? I look around to try to locate something. Ah, a puddle, that will do. I approach it and look at the reflection.

What? No, that's impossible.

I look around, trying to debunk what my eyes just saw in that reflection. My vision is still blurry. Must have been the damn sun. I rub my eyes with what I think are my hands, but am instead greeted with some flat, hard substance. Where are my hands? The blurry image slowly begins to sharpen.

Into two hooves. With a dark red fur leading up to them.

My God… What?! Why?! How?! My jaw dropped. This can't be. I thought. There's no way.

This is impossible. Nobody could ever do this. This can't be real. But the pain, the ground, the barn, this body: it all seemed real. I could feel it. I had to face the facts: I was… a pony. I was one of them. I was one of these candy-colored equines from one of my favorite shows. A dream for some, and at one point mine, but being the cynical person I am, I wouldn't last one day here. They would up and banish me like that.

If I could've snapped right there, I would have. Damn hooves.

All right, this may be real. But then again, for all I know this could be one hell of a lucid dream. No sense delaying the inevitable. Time to assess the damage. I look in that puddle again. Looking at my fur, I realized that I lucked out. Big time.

Dark red.

Not an edgy color like black, nor an abomination like bright orange, nor a dainty one like pink. A nice, subtle dark red. Also, a smooth dark brown mane and tail. Phew, am I glad I look all right.

What am I talking about? I'm one of them. Nothing is right about this. Nothing.

Also, looking again, I see something else…well, the absence of two things. No horn nor wings. Out of the three types of ponies I could have been, I'm an earth pony. No amazing magic spells. No power of flight. I'm stuck on the ground for my entire life.

"Entire life"? The thought makes me sick. I'm not going to be stuck here forever… Hopefully…

"I've got to figure out where I am," I say to myself. Easier said than done. It seems to be all forest around this abandoned shed. That's why no one has touched this place. I thought. It's in the middle of a damn forest. Why was a barn ever here? Who would have lived here? I do a full circle and it's all trees. Peering into the trees and hearing various noises, I make a realization.

"This place looks dangerous," I say quietly, "I'd better stay here until I can…"

Right on cue, the barn collapses.

Christ, I could have been in the damn thing! What if I had been asleep longer than that? Looking back at the barn, or what was once a barn, I assess my options. "This doesn't bode well," I tell myself, "I can't stay here anymore." I faced the trees again. I must do this. I must leave this clearing.

Here we go. One step in and it is immediately darker. There are plants of many colors and small animals that scurry away from my foot, er-hoofsteps. The flowers and weeds grow tall in this jungle. Eventually, I pause and stumble upon these beautiful flowers.

"Wow, these ones are… interesting," I tell myself, "but why do I recognize these?"

Out of the corner of my eye I see a bird fly right above the flowers and then land on a branch. I admire the sight of other life. It opens its beak, about to sing a song of its own, showing the other birds its music prowess, but instead clucks like a chicken. Well, that was quite an experience. I mean, where else could you see and hear that phenomenon? So why did it cluck like a chicken? Maybe I was hearing things. Or maybe it was those flowers. But how could flowers do that? Certain plants can make you suffer allergic reactions, but nothing like that. Why do those look familiar though?

Come on! Why do I have this innate feeling like I know what these are? I shouldn't have any idea of the ecosystem in here! Is this some kind of joke?!

Wait a minute, I remember now. That episode where they unknowingly ran into that patch of it. Poison… joke, I think is what it's called. So, in a way, it was a form of joke.

All right, that's enough. "If that was Poison Joke, then this must be… the Everfree…" I said, putting two and two together. But now something else hits me: I know some of this world. But I did not know exactly where I was in here, nor could I accurately describe it. Well, damp is one way I can put it, everywhere I walk greeted by a squishy sound, as mud gathered onto my hooves. I tried to shake some of it off as I was walked through this surprisingly dark forest.

(scrunch) Not looking where I was going, I walked right into a prickly bush.

"Agh Mother-! Stupid son-of-a-…" I began quite loudly. Brambles tend to hurt, especially ones on the face. I thought of some other words, obviously unfit for this land and its inhabitants, before remembering something about this place. It hit me like a ton of bricks: I shouldn't bring this much attention to myself. I could attract unwanted visitors.

(SNAP) Too late.

I hear snarling coming from behind a bunch of trees. A timberwolf? More than one, most likely. The beginning of "Piece by Piece" echoes through my mind as I now acknowledge what may be my short time here. How embarrassing. I get killed five minutes into this fantasy. Here they come. Three of them, it turns out, charging right at me. Run, damn it, run!

I got a good ten feet, but they end covering much more ground than I do, not surprising though. Also, I am not quite used to running on four legs. The leader hits me with a lot of power. (THUD) Ouch. Right into a tree trunk, then into a pit of mud, and I scream in pain, face down in the mud, as my back took the full force of the blow. I get up, and try running again; this time with a bad back. Not a chance though, as one bites my back-right leg, his large teeth sinking a low blow near my hoof, rendering my ability to run completely useless. Agonizing pain then stops me in my tracks and I fall on the rough forest floor, screaming in pain.

I can't even walk, let alone get up and escape. Only one option left: If I play dead, they might… I started to think, but recognized the chances of survival, oh, who am I kidding? These things don't kill for sport, they kill for food. I'm as good as dead.

One more painful throw. I sensed it coming as one picked me up by their sharp teeth and cocked their head back.

(WHACK) This time into a stone. This one hurt so much more. I try to scream, but this time it just knocked the wind out of me and I couldn't. As I lay on the dirt, eyes closed in pain, unable to move and breathe normally, I hear the growling get louder and louder. Now, I feel the slobber of the middle wolf, ready to finish me off and begin his light snack. Defenseless. That's all I feel right now. I'm dog food. Closer and closer and closer they get, ensuring me that I will truly die. Their breathing is intense.

Then, it instantly stopped. My eyes opened at times, now with blurry vision again, and I could tell they looked back, stopped growling, and instead began whimpering. These menacing creatures are now cowering in fear. Something is scaring the hell out of these wolves, and I can't see it, but am not optimistic. Great, something bigger, I thought.

They start sprinting out of there; the scampering of the wolves grow more and more distant. Well, whatever frightened those things off, I sure as hell don't want to mess with it. Hopefully, whatever it is won't eat me. The wolves were gone. Well, now I just sit here and die, I thought as I let my mind slip in and out of consciousness, during which I see flash images.

One shadowed figure… coming towards me. The stone… is getting…. farther away. Am I… moving? The sky is… becoming visible. The… moon. Night. Something… was dragging me... Probably to my early grave…


Not even ten minutes and he is already broken, beat, and nearly killed.

What did you think of this so far? This is just going to be me inserting myself into the show for humorous purposes. I hoped you like it.

Coming up...

What happens to Zenith? Will he ever figure out how he got himself here? All that and more on the next chapter!