I wrote this because I've found a lack of "traditional" Arthur stories (that is, plots that resemble what you might see on the show). Maybe people think they're boring, I don't know. Most of the works feature members of the cast dying/killing others, interacting with weird crap, or just being as OOC as possible (although I will admit, I do love Dead Composer's works, bizarre occurrences and all. He/she knows their way around a piece of prose).

Anyhoo, when trying to pick a topic that hadn't been done yet on the show, I decided to do a little bit of "art imitates life" and have Arthur & Buster try to create a suitable fanfic. In the course of the story, I poke fun at the cliches of the fanfic genre, but I want everyone to know that I'm not insulting them or their writing personally.

Anyway, please do enjoy, or something.

Arthur Read sat at his computer in the den of his house.

"Oh hi" he said, to no one in particular, "Buster and I just discovered a great new concept; fanfiction. You can write stories about your favorite fictional characters and make them do whatever you want. I know what some of my friends would write about. Like Muffy for instance, she loves Princess Peach."

He imagined a Princess Peach castle, only instead of the regular princess, it was Muffy sitting on the throne, flanked by servants.

"Your new shipment of dresses has arrived, your highness" said one, a dog man.

"Oh goody" Princess Muffy said "I'll be able to wear a different dress every day of the year. Now I'd like some lunch."

"Of course" said the man, who snapped his fingers. Another servant arrived with a silver tray and removed the lid, revealing an exquisite gourmet lunch.

"Cooked pheasant, au gratin potatoes, and for dessert, baked alaska" the first servant said, listing off the items.

"What, no soda?" Princess Muffy asked.

"And I know what Binky would write…" Arthur continued.

Inside a wrestling ring, an aardvark man, who bore a striking resemblance to professional wrestler Shawn Michaels, was taking a beating from two others, a mean looking rabbit, and a tough rat.

"Oh man, Sean Michelo is taking a severe beating" said the commentator, who resembled Mr. Haney with a cowboy hat and Southern accent "is nobody going to stop this travesty of justice?"

"Hold on Sean, I'll save you!" came a familiar voice.

Immediately Binky Barnes, clad in a white singlet with black boots and trunks made his way to the ring.

"Oh my gosh, Binky 'the Bully' Barnes is coming to Michelo's aid" the commentator shouted.

Binky quickly bounced off the ropes and hit a clothesline on the rat man. When the rabbit charged him, he caught him and executed a backdrop. Then he grabbed the dazed wrestler and positioned his head between his legs.

"Looks like he's going for the Binky Bomb!" the commentator shouted.

Binky then executed a powerbomb on the rabbit man, and helped Michelo to his feet.

"Thanks Binky" the man said "you are truly a wrestling legend."

"Yeah, I know" Binky replied, a big grin on his face.

The ring and Binky disappeared as Arthur broke from his fantasy, or rather, the fantasies of his friends.

"Yeah, fanfiction can be a pretty wonderful thing" he said, "but the best thing about it is that you can write it yourself. Most of the time."

Fandemonium.

It was a typical day at the Read house, and Buster & Arthur were looking on the Internet to see what they could find about Bionic Bunny.

"Look at all these Bionic Bunny websites" Arthur said, "we could spend hours checking out these."

"Try that one" Buster said, pointing to a link "'Bionic Bunny Headquarters.' That sounds interesting."

Arthur clicked on the link and brought up a webpage emblazoned with a big picture of Bionic Bunny. There were other smaller links leading to episode summaries, pictures and other content.

"Ooh, what's that one?" Buster asked, pointing to the link labeled "fanfiction."

"I think that's where people write their own Bionic Bunny stories" Arthur said.

"Let's read some of them" Buster suggested, so Arthur accessed the link.

"Let's see, 'Bionic Bunny's Bad Day' 'You Know You've Been Watching Too Much Bionic Bunny When…' 'She-onic bunny'" Arthur read off some of the titles.

"Hey, what do you suppose 'slash' means?" Buster asked, looking at some of the story summaries.

"They're probably stories where Bionic Bunny gets attacked with knives, I guess" Arthur suggested.

"That's stupid, he's bionic, knives can't hurt him" Buster said, "some people are so dumb."

"This one sounds neat, 'Bionic Bunny vs. the Giant Monster'" Arthur said.

"Cool! Click on it!" Buster said excitedly. Arthur did so and brought up the story.

One day things were good in the city then a monster started attacking.

Aaah people screamed

'Someone call Bionic Bunny' sad a man

But Bionic Bunny was no home, he was in space stop a comet

"Take this comet" sed Bionic Bunny. Then he herd people screaming.

Uh-oh, people in trouble, I must hep them he said. So he fly down to the city.

"Did that make any sense to you?" Buster asked.

"No, it was like something D.W. would write" Arthur complained, "let's try another one."

"Ooh, this one sounds good" Buster said, "it has a few author created characters though."

"Nothing wrong with that" Arthur said, "let's check it out."

Timmy sat in his house in the big city. It was a boring day, as always.

"I wish things would happen around here" Timmy said, "I mean, besides Bionic Bunny saving the day that is."

Just then, his friend Steve called. "Hey dude, you wanna go to McDavid's and get a burger?" he asked.

"Maybe later" Timmy said, "right now I need to question my boring existence."

"How's Julie?" Steve asked.

"She is good" Timmy said, "hard to believe she and Rick are going steady."

"When does Bionic Bunny come in?" Buster asked.

"They mentioned him earlier, he's probably in here later" Arthur said. But after reading the next chapter and a half, there was still no sign of the floppy–eared hero.

"You know, for a story on a Bionic Bunny fan site, there sure isn't a lot of Bionic Bunny in it" Buster commented.

"Tell me about it" Arthur added "maybe another of these will be better."

But none were satisfactory to the boys. One was a story that completely changed BB's origins. Another was a "what if" focusing on the hero as a girl ("get rid of it, quick!" Buster shouted). Still another just seemed to be a bunch of nothingness, as if the author didn't have a plot and just came up with silly random situations instead. The one where he died a terrible, bloody death also seemed unappealing.

Later the boys were up in Arthur's room, playing with action figures.

"Well that was a waste of an afternoon" Arthur said.

"Tell me about it" Buster said, "those stories were weird. I wish someone had written just a generic Bionic Bunny story, you know. Like when I wrote that episode."

"You mean the one with Elias Howe and the giant bobbin?" Arthur asked. Suddenly, the young aardvark boy had a burst of inspiration "hey, why don't we write a fanfiction. We know what we like."

"Good idea Arthur" Buster said, "we can make it just the way we want it. No girls or knives or anything."

"Yeah, this is going to be fun!" Arthur said, "now we just need to come with a story idea."

"How about 'Bionic Bunny fights a giant snail?'" Buster suggested.

"They already did that. Ours should be something they haven't done on the show yet."

"Oh! But the show's done everything!" Buster exclaimed "those TV writers are such talented guys!"

"Calm down Buster" Arthur said "we can figure this out. Look, let's think about this tonight and tomorrow we'll share what we've got."

"Okay, see ya Arthur"

"Bye Buster."

Next time, the two friends reveal their ideas (i.e. aliens) and Brain & Francine offer their own unhelpful advice.